Undergraduate / U of M: describe your interests and aspirations in engineering. [12]

College of Engineering Please describe your interests and aspirations in engineering. What experiences have influenced you?

Math and science have always fascinated me since I was a child. However, it wasn't until this year that I've decided that I had a penchant for engineering. It all started when I built my computer from scratch, drilling screws and making sure every part was in place. Something as simple as a fan not working can fry your CPU in just 20 seconds. When the lights finally went green and the startup screen was on, I knew I had completed my goal. This diligent yet rewarding procedure is what I love about building. The satisfaction knowing that you are why the product is standing in its entirety is insurmountable. Even so, I don't think I ever truly understood engineering to say I aspired to be an engineer-until now.

While I enjoy building things I also fancy chemistry and medicine. I finally found a way to combine these two predilections of mine into one-nanotechnology. After being introduced to nanotechnology on Discovery channel, I was definitely captivated. Nanotechnology turns out to be the bridge to all my ambitions. It allows me to build machinery on a sub-atomic level and then use them for medical applications, including curing cancer.

Additionally, my interests in nanotechnology stem from the fact that we are just beginning to learn about nanotechnology which means I can actually help contribute to our knowledge on such an arcane subject. I believe that University of Michigan is a place where I can explore this ambition. With its specialized Nanotechnology Institute for Medicine and Biological Sciences, I can learn not only from its insightful engineering program but also delve into the intricacies of nanotechnology. It is there I will be able to combine my interests in math and science and my ventures to help society.

I fixed up my last sentence.. I don't think it's very strong though.. still.

Undergraduate / Question about Umich's Diversity.. Modern Art [10]

Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.

I seriously can't think of anything for this prompt, I haven't really been in international community program or in another country..

I was getting desperate and thinking if I wrote about how I had high stereotypes and how my two best friends that i met in high school, who happen to be part of the some of the races i had stereotypes about, break this stereotype. Only thing is I don't have a "specific experience" that showed me diversity but rather a combined experience in my years of high school with them. Would this topic be a little too cliche and not really show my respect for diversity.

Any help of any kind would be appreciated lol

Undergraduate / "I already had many stereotypes" - U of M: Diversity essay [4]

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this because well this is just a question I'm having troubles with so tell me if this is good at all for starters or should I Just completely start over. Thanks

Coming into high school I already had many stereotypes compounded into my head. I judged people, liberally, without getting to know them first. I thought that all Hispanic people were stupid and lazy and that all Jews were unfriendly and cheap. Ironically, as it turns out my two best friends in high school are both from these two ethnic groups, Arthur and Guillermo. They make up an important part of my high school experience and an important lesson that I've learned.

They've showed me that stereotypical and first impressions don't help you understand a person at all. Instead they give you a false sense of knowing them when you really don't. Indeed, they have both helped me a lot in my high school years, whether academically or personally. Arthur has helped me developed as a person who challenges themselves and not give up. In fact I attribute my change in high school completely to him. He encouraged me to compete with him and as such drove me to my limits. Without him I don't think I would've had the academic success that I did. Guillermo, on the other hand, is great to talk to when you're feeling down. His humorous and joyful demeanor always cheers me up even in the toughest situations of life. I am happy that I didn't avoid them when we first met, I am happy I got to know them and I'm happy I learned how false, and ridiculous, stereotypical judgments are. My two friends have definitely grown on me and while I can't say we're going to the same college or even the same state, they will definitely be adamantly set in my memories as my best friends in high school.

Undergraduate / 'Asian in New York' - Cultural Differences Essay. [3]

This is a crappy rough draft, I'll probably ornate it with more imagery, but I'm just not sure if this topic seems too ostentatious or not >_>

Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.

Growing up in Flushing, New York, I never fully appreciated the vast range of cultural differences in my area. As I walked down Main Street, I only knew how to complain about the stench of the flea markets, the annoying multi-lingual conversations, and the annoying Bollywood store next to my favorite mall. In truth, I did not know I was in a central, cultural melting pot, and how lucky I was. As I got on the plane to Hong Kong, I would soon understand the phrase of "you don't know what you got till it's gone."

When I arrived in Hong Kong, I was excited about the new landscape and the new culture that I would enccounter. I was not disappointed, as the renowned cuisines tasted amazingly refreshing for they had foods I hadn't eaten before. The pop culture there was just as electrifying as that of New York. And yet, even with this excitingly new atmosphere in Hong Kong, something was missing; a link that I could not establish with that of New York. While everything seemed "new," it all seemed to come from a similar source and was not very eclectic. There were no Bollywood stores next to flea markets, or next to Toys R' Us. There were no subway restaurants next to Chinese restaurants, next to Italian restaurants. The conspicuous cultural identities that existed in New York were gone as everything in Hong Kong was "Asian."

After that trip, I came to understand the privilege of living in New York. Having been exposed to a multitude of cultures, I don't consider other ethnic customs weird or awkward, but rather a common aspect to what I see, hear and taste everyday. I hope to my appreciation and acceptance for cultural diversity will contribute to the diversity of University of Michigan.

Undergraduate / Looking for fundamentals of how everything is functioning Cornell Arts & Sciences 'interests' prompt [7]

I feel this is a pretty weak essay, so any help to fix it would be nice. Not sure if I should edit or just start over.

Describe your intellectual interests, their evolution, and what makes them exciting to you. Tell us how you will utilize the academic programs in the College of Arts and Sciences to further explore your interests, intended major, or field of study.

My drive to explore the fundamentals of how everything functions underscores my interests in Chemistry. I wanted to know why we used salt to thaw snow, why iron rusts, and why water can't mix with oil. Chemistry explained all this, and vivified the intricacies of the matter around us. I thought Chemistry was the sole field I wanted to dedicate my life to studying. And it was until my trip to Hong Kong, in 2006, which caused me to want to explore medicine as well.

Her hacking cough resonated throughout my eardrums as I observed her pallid, attenuating, complexion. Combined with her blood-stricken and dry lips, it spoke volumes about her health. I knew my grandma did not have a lot of time left. Chemotherapy had been ineffective for the last few months, and her body was getting weaker by the second.

When I arrived in Hong Kong, I saw my grandma for the first time since 1998. However, I didn't see that uplifting smile I remembered her for, but, instead the nefarious lung cancer slowly devouring her. She lost the charisma, the energy and the aura of affection that I admired her for. Hearing not her delectable laughter, but her strident cough of blood, I cringed in fear. She was dying, and I couldn't help her.

I heard the news two months after I returned to New York. My grandma's battle with lung cancer was over; she fought an enduringly, but ultimately succumbed to the disease. Even though I had expected it subconsciously, it didn't mitigate the pain at all. My sadness eventually transformed into action, as I decided that medicine was another field I relished to study. I wanted to prevent other teenagers from having to face the same pain I felt of losing a loved one. Still, my predilection for Chemistry was unfazed, as I now strived to study both.

Last year, after exploring the Nanotechnology Exhibit in Albany, I finally discovered a way to combine my penchant for chemistry and medicine-nanotechnology. After seeing the exorbitant amount of nano-based products, I was impressed by the vast array of possibilities for it-including electronics, energy sources, and medicine. More importantly, the study of nanotechnology permits me to incorporate the complexities of chemistry with my passion to help others. Through dedication and diligence, I will be able to assist in and contribute to our knowledge on this phenomenon and hopefully cure cancer.

Cornell's college of Agriculture and Life Sciences provides the environment in which I can explore my ambition of improving society through fields I enjoy most. Through its renowned undergraduate research facilities, I hope to apply my talents and interests to help advance our erudition in science. It is here that, as my school's motto says, "I will be able to leave my city greater than when I found it.

This essay seems unfocused and it's also above the limit. So any advice and any deletion of parts/sentences that I don't need is fully appreciated