Undergraduate / "Bullying" ; MIT World Prompt/ world you come from [14]

Describe the world you come from; for example, your family, clubs, school, community, city, or town. How has that world shaped your dreams and aspirations?(*) (200-250 words)

"Chino (Chinese in Spanish)" someone shouted across the street. It startled me; this dreaded word stirred up my worst nightmares. I still vividly remembered when I first arrived at my school in El Salvador. It was supposed to be a bright and sunny day until someone called me "Chino Culero". I greeted him with a smile and said "Hola (hello)", but suddenly the whole class burst in laughter, little did I know that "Chino Culero" means "Gay Chinese" in Spanish. Even now I can recall the cold unfeeling eyes staring at me and the evil monotonous laughter ringing in my ears.

Two years later, when I was in a summer camp in Taiwan, a similar scenario unfolded before my eyes. During lunch break three bullies flipped my friend's desk over and threw all his possession over the window. Immediately, I tried to stand up but my lack of strength left me seated when memories of evil laughter starts to resurface. I began sweating profusely and my heart starts beating faster than the snaring drum. I tried to shout out but I was suffocated by my own throat. Helplessly, I watched my friend suffered by the hands of the bullies while my chest starts to tighten. To him, I was just another cold unfeeling eye.

Eight months ago I witness another bullying. But this time I said no. I said no to my fears because of my anguish, my friend's agony, and my anger towards my cowardly self. I stood up.

The same idea guys, please review for any mistakes and harsher the critic the better.

Undergraduate / "Broken Bow" MIT Challenge Prompt - [4]

Tell us about the most significant challenge you've faced or something important that didn't go according to plan. How did you manage the situation?(*) (200-250 words)

Taking a deep breath I draw my bow. I can feel my trapezius tense up while my pectorals relax. Tension gradually builds up in my forearms while stresses of IB fade away. I can feel everything, from the slight up-and-down movement of my chest to the blazing sun and the breezy wind. Finally, the long awaited ringing sound of my clicker* arrives, but instead comes the unpleasant "crack".

I jerked forward as this ominous sound pulled me away from my world. I looked down but I could already feel what happened, my bow arm was snapped in half. Tomorrow is my last tournament and there is no way I can participate with a broken bow. I expected this moment to be more dramatic, with tears flowing, theatrical music playing, and weather changing. But everything seems the same. I talked to my coach, asked him if there were any alternatives for tomorrow, and told him "I am sorry".

After I went home tears start to drop as disappointment overwhelmed me. However as I gradually remembered the fun I had when I practiced with my friends, the anxiety I had when I attended my first tournament, and the astonishment I had when I first saw the exorbitant price tag of my favorite bow, tears slowly dried up. I remembered something important: passion. I remembered that medals, honors, and GPA are just the byproduct of chasing my dream. I was smiling.

*A signal that shows that I reached the correct draw length.

How is the essay? Any feedback and revision is much appreciated, and remember the harsher the better

Undergraduate / Papercraft and its influence on my life; extracurricular activities/ work experiences [8]

Hi everyone, thank you all so much for reviewing my past two essays. Can everyone help me with this essay too?

Prompt: Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).

Running the X-Acto knife meticulously down the center of the cutting line and waiting patiently until the glue between two small pieces of paper dried, I came to love this craft. In papercraft each cut and paste has to be perfect, a simple error of deviating 1mm from the cutting line could affect the integrity of work and a small over application of glue may destroy the aesthetics of the craft. However, despite the craft's mind taxing nature, I find it comforting. With every incision and gluing I slowly forget about the stresses of my life: the essay due tomorrow, the pending college application, and the upcoming exams. I, instead, focus on my creation. I pour my heart into every pieces of paper, and every time when the new parts are added I grow excited, because I can see my ideas slowly come to live. Finally, once the last piece of paper completes the craft I would look at it and with a big smile of satisfaction, because my dream had just come true.

Many thanks in advance