Writing Feedback / Improving social-media equipment in this era has an impact on communication among human beings [3]

the use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationship between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Improving social media equipment in globalization era has an impact in communication with humankind. In my point of view, I tend to agree with that statement, in which there is negative effect about that.

First and foremost, the bigger the impact of the electronic media as the communication make a longer relationship because media has a limitation of people face to face and interact with other people. For example, base on research by Global Network, most of the people since 2000s had been tending to send messages or call by phone to communicate with the other rather than by faced direction. In which sometimes people lived some home to do that activity. As a consequence, most of the people in the world have a less emotional connection with humankind or family. Finally, media social has bad impact of relationship with others

In addition, the other drawback of the high media communication is a social impact. Due to most of the people tend to apathetic with surrounding environment. In which it is enough for them using by social media communication with other people. For example base on a statistic research by New York University, people prefer to felicitation by online networks such as Facebook, Path or LINE, than join in a birthday party or married party. As a result the social connection with surrounding or friend, every year becomes unfamiliar.

On the other hand, media also has a positive effect on one side, in which people lived in a different location easy to communicate with each other by a high social network. However, using of electronic equipment rather than meet direction by face to face has a different emotional connection side. in another side, it also has beneficial of physiology and relationship.

The aforementioned evidence shows that media social as a communication has a bad impact on society and relationship in which it also has an influence of people neighborhood.

Writing Feedback / Developing of medical system in many sides keep people healthier and their life expectancy is higher [5]

one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.
do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Recently, as the result of the developing of the medical system in many sides make people healthy and expectancy life people increase. In my opinion, there are some benefits and drawback people who are long age. Then following this essay I will give my strong reason.

First and foremost, the advantages of this, long life age make new chance which they have a very productive age's is very important for the development of the country. Based on data from WHO organization that China is example country in which success open a lot of jobs and develop their citizen to improve the economy country as the consequence china now become the giant economy in the world then they have a higher life expectancy rate. Moreover, long life also has an impact in society in which people have a good physically and mentality is still be needed their help in some side. For instance, The scientists or Professors still be needed of their knowledge and the ability for humankind although their age over sixty years. Finally, Durability and life chances are increased levels in which pushed up opportunities in develop of countries are also very large.

However there is contrast opinion says that good life expectancy has a lot of negative effect in humankind then the most problem is a high increase of medical care. The phenomenon of population ageing is directly related to what is known as health transition. According to an OECD report, the over-65 age group accounts for 40-50% of healthcare spending and they're per capita health care costs are three to five times higher than for those under 65. And there are fears that public expenditure could rise as the result of ageing happened in good life expectancy countries. This has impact continuously which countries will spend more money to give the treatment and good medical for them but the productivity work is not balance in which every year they decrease. As a consequence, make the fee of labor will incline dramatically. Therefore improvement in life expectancy significantly also increases the citizen life cost and country.

In conclusion, the positive of having high life expectancy is there are many populations of productive age that it is an essential part in the country's development. However, there is negative too, which high expectancy in the world make the cost of citizen increase significant mostly in medical care.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TAKS 2 : the best method of learning, through group study or independent study? [3]

In the world of education, there are several techniques to learn, in which many people, throughout the world, assume that for several student learn with group discussion is better, While some students prefer to study by themselves. I argue that both of views have merits and demerits for a student have their own way to study, however in my opinions study together with other friends are more benefit.

Firstly, many schools suggest their students to learn together in a study group, it is related with the research study or other subjects. Base on Pennsylvania research, study group has a purpose educate the pupil skills and analytic, then make them active thinking to solve a problem together with their friends and they improve the sense of mind also they have good skill communicate. Moreover, group discussion teaches about moral and attitude values such tolerance and sharing with the other. Studied in American elementary school, the student has experienced in a study group, generally have higher social respect with their friends and easy to accept of diversity. Finally study group have many positive impacts on pupils

However, a student tends to do an individual study the reason is more focus on their subject. self-study also makes Student gains the freedom to learn without restrictions. they can do anywhere and anytime and improve their concentration. For example based on MOSS (most online study self) organisation, student choose self-learning is more compatible to answer the question in which most of them have high record pass the exam. However many a student do the self-study has difficult when they learn in which they have only a little guidance, if something the book not clear or the subject is confusing no-one friends to help also student needs more time to solve their problem

The aforementioned evidence shows that, although self-learning has a benefit but it also has a weakness. In my opinion, study-group is more useful for students to increase knowledge gained from their peers and be able to correct each other in one group.

Writing Feedback / Nowadays, the substantial issue of the world is the overpopulation - IELTS [2]

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time.
what are the causes of this continued rise?
do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

Nowadays, the substantial issue the world is the overpopulation, consequently many problems faced by humankind around the world. In my opinion, unbalance a low mortality rate than the growth of birth rate and also the level of treatment advanced is the main problem the global population increase then I agree that statement, following this essay I will give some reason to support it.

First and foremost, the overpopulation every year caused by the decline of death rate make of total population unbalanced between the birth rate and death rate in many countries. According to data from World Bank Organization 2010, the birth rate in whole the world increases fifty percent compares thirty years ago, while the mortality rate only grows below twenty percent. as a consequence, the poverty rate is increasing in many countries that cause the new social problem in society such poverty, unemployment, and crime. Therefore, a high birth rate otherwise low mortality is main reason in society

In addition, the improving of medicine system is supporting of the citizen growth. following the industrial revolution, technological advancement was perhaps the biggest reason in which Medical science made new many discoveries. According to the 2014 CIA World Factbook during fifty years, death rate decrease from 35 percent to below 10 percent. Illnesses that had claimed thousands of lives till now were cured because of the invention of vaccines. Because of this, population increase significant in makes the other effects of overpopulation that is a depletion of resources the earth in which can only produce a limited amount of water and food as result starvation happens in many countries. Finally improving treatment techniques increase total the citizen around the world but make new problem another side.

The aforementioned evidence shows that advanced medical technology, as well as the number of deaths worldwide, decline pushed the number of people with significant increases, but then to create new problems, such as poverty, unemployment resources are not sufficient and famine.

Writing Feedback / The change of Stockfort village in 1930 and 2010 [5]

The picture illustrates about the Stokeford town change during 80 years. It is apparent from the information that village was developing significantly with there was many housing and new road construct.

To begin in 1930, from the north to the south the east of Rivers Stock in the village only had one of the major roads. Besides that, there are some farmlands on there. Then there was a post office on the left side of the road, beside the north of building there were two shops and some houses, the opposite was a primary school. In addition in the middle of town, a large house stayed and this building surrounded by a huge garden.

In contrast, over the next 8 decades in 2010, the village many experienced some alteration, in which people in Stokeford village eliminate all the farmland and also demolish all shops which it replaced with a housing and new road. the primary school in this town was developing with constructed of the new building on the east side. In addition, the Large Houses was replaced with a Retirement Home in which the garden area was reduced. Then in the front of this building government build of the housing area.

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Writing Feedback / The new phenomena in this world - the increased crime among young people in many countries [3]

The crime rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions

Nowadays, the new phenomena happened in many parts of this world where Juvenile delinquency is increasing significantly. It is important to know why this has happened and to look at ways to solve the problem.

The most reason is a breakdown problem in the nuclear family. Increasing of divorced in several countries is most support the youngster become a lawbreaker. For instance, as the following data from criminology at Cambridge University, Divorce significantly affects the rate of crime, in which they found that the divorce of parents before the children was aged ten was one of the major predictors of adolescent delinquency and adult criminality. Moreover, there is real indicating the high rate of criminality in society caused by environment and society. Base on Serious Youth Crime organization, the geographic is supporting the concentration of crime occurs at various levels, which is generally due to basic problems such as poverty and high unemployment. Poor family ties, lack of proper supervision, Lack of parental connection force minors to associate more time with their peers thus increasing their chances of receiving wrong information from the environment that lead them into committing delinquent activities.

The methods to reduce the lawbreaker on teenager are Education. It plays a very significant role in molding young people into responsible and law abiding adults. Education-based programs provide both parents and children with the right information and thus influencing their decision. These programs educate young people about drugs, sexuality gangs, and weapons. This information helps them understand the consequences of their delinquent actions. These programs are more successful in reducing juvenile delinquency since they target the young people in their early stages of life.

To sum up, the major reason for crime rate grow on adolescent are the divorce of their parents in which the teenager get less attention from their parents. Moreover, lack of proper knowledge of the surrounding environment encourages crime rate in adolescents. To overcome the lawbreaker on a teenager with education in which right information and the impact on the future of young people.

Writing Feedback / PUCHASING OF BOOKS BY COUNTRIES - the greatest money spent on a book in Germany in 2005 [NEW]

The line graph illustrates about the total amount finished to bought the books in five countries, Germany, France Italy, and Austria in million $ US dollar, from 1995 to 2005. It is apparent from the information that, the first state in 1995 to the final state in 2005, all countries show a positive trend in money finished on books.

To begin, Germany showed the greatest level the greatest money spent in a book by purchasing increased to over 90 million in 2005. Money spent in Germany had experienced growth in 1995 and 1999. Then, it also had experienced in 2001 and 2003. At the final stage, the money spent remained increase until 2005.

In addition, France and Italy showed approximately similar trend both of them from 1995 to 1997 around 50 and 60 million dollars. When the survey in 1997, the gaps had bigger in which Italy had experienced drop but Italy continue steady incline to the end in 2005. Moreover, Austria, although it started with it the lowest country which spent money purchased the books, however, total spend money in Austria from 1995 to 2005 increased gradually, in which finally Austria passed the Italy country at the end of periods.

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Writing Feedback / The source shows the sale of hybrid vehicles in the world from 2006 to 2009 [4]

IELTS-TAKS 1: GLOBAL HYBRID VEHICLES SALES.

The bar chart provides the source of the world sales of hybrid vehicles, based on countries and total sale from 2006 to 2009. It is apparent from the information that the US had the highest in sales of hybrid vehicles and total world sale was increased more than 2 times.

To begin, in 2006 the highest sale hybrid vehicles was the US it stood at 250,000, then in the next year, it increased gradually and reached a high 350,000. However, in 2008 total hybrid vehicles sales decreased slightly and continued to fall to below 300,000 in the end of the period.

In contrary, the sale of hybrid vehicles in Japan in 2006 stood at around 50,000. Then over the two years, it inclined slightly near to 10,000 in 2008. In addition in 2009, the total of sales in Japan rose dramatically 3 times higher than previous last year and it passed over US sale to around 325,000. Moreover, in other countries from the beginning to the end of the period, the data showed that it grew steadily.

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