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Posts by rnsnz18
Name: Antonio
Joined: Dec 27, 2016
Last Post: Jan 4, 2017
Threads: 10
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rnsnz18   
Jan 4, 2017
Undergraduate / Baseball and my grandfather matters to me. [3]

Stanford supplemental essay: what matters to you and why?(250 words)

My grandfather's baseball passion shaped me



I love witness a double play. I get up from my seat to celebrate a stolen base. I even revel in the smell of hot dogs around the stadium. But what I most love is watching baseball with my grandfather. I was 5 years old when he took me to my first game. Since that day, the sport became an obsession and I watched every Dodgers game with him. Baseball allowed me to make a strong connection with my grandfather. I loved our long conversations and his stories about when he was a professional player.

Unfortunately, my grandfather developed Alzheimer his last year. He also lost the mobility of his body and became a reserved person. I started to take care of him and watched baseball with him even knowing he wouldn't pay attention. I just wanted him to recover his passion that made him feel alive. Until one day, he surprised me celebrating a Grandal's Home Run against Chicago Cubs. My grandfather died a week later but at least he smiled again and watched the rest of the series with the same passion I remembered.

Though he'd love me to follow his steps and become a professional player, he told me to embrace my passion for mathematics. "A talent always comes with a responsibility", that's what he always said. I want to be like my grandfather and use my interest for mathematics to change other people lives, just like my grandfather used his baseball passion to change mine.
rnsnz18   
Jan 4, 2017
Undergraduate / Aspiring to Help Others as the way to achieve success - Essay A [4]

@marissamuehl
I woukd love if you post the original prompt to give you a better feedback. The title says aspiring to help other while achieving succes. Well you clearly said what you want to do with your communication studies to help others. But your background story doesn't supoport that, you talked about overcoming a diificulty that made want to study communication, that doesn't supore your desire for helpong other while you achieve success. You need a background story where you help other people and made better they lives, don't focus too much about talking how great you are for overcoming your fear and have given the best speech.Also you talk too much at the end about your desire for your major and more specific things. It would be better to say what things you want to do, what specifix achievements more than just earning a degree, and how Texas A&M will help you do that and help you to help others.But again, the origibal promp will allow me to help you more.
rnsnz18   
Jan 3, 2017
Undergraduate / TEDtalk conference contributed to my development on mathematics and other sciences [2]

Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.(100 to 250 words).

better focus for reaching goals



I remember a class in the Math Olympiad where the professor projected a TEDtalk conference called "Marshmallow test and instant gratification". It had nothing to do with math; however, it's been the most important thing for my development on mathematics and other sciences. The video talks about how people look for immediate pleasure instead of sacrificing it for obtaining a better reward in the future. From that day, I learned that if I wanted to be successful I needed to work hard and left the leisure on a second plane. But instead of making a "sacrifice" I combined the time of hardworking with my passions, that way I'd always be having fun while striving for my future success.

The work ethic I acquired since that class has been the fundamental key for reaching my goals. I narrowed down my activities and focused on the Math Olympiad and School's Science Club. My results on the contests changed considerably and a few months later I passed the state stage that I had failed the previous year.

I also knew the importance of making a balance between working and distraction. Surprisingly for me, I became better in my hobbies too. I forgot everything about math and my competitions and put my entire concentration either on playing soccer or learning magic. Now every time I do something I ask myself if it is going to make me achieve what I want, not only in the mathematical Olympiad, but also in any personal aspiration.

Thanks in advance for your feedback, in my firsy essay I don't mention my awards in the olympiad soccer and magic because that's on another part of the application so i thibk that shows the rewards of my work ethic. I hope this two essays reslly talk more about my voice and are well developed for the stanford application.
rnsnz18   
Jan 2, 2017
Undergraduate / How do you improve the life of others? MIT essay [8]

@Holt
Thank you very much! I already submitted this essay with my application to MIT, you helped me a lot in my MIT essays, I really appreciate your contributions.
rnsnz18   
Jan 2, 2017
Undergraduate / Something thay didn't go according the plan [4]

@NickNack
Thank you for your suggestion, in other part of the application i mentioned that i traveled to the IMO (intl math olympiad) thay was hosted in thailand so i think that shows the importance of the trip, i didn't want to waste space saying it again. I will work on you other suggedtion, thank you very much
rnsnz18   
Jan 2, 2017
Undergraduate / Something thay didn't go according the plan [4]

This my essay for the MIT essay: Tell us about a challenge you faced or something important that didn't go according to the plan. How did you manage the situation?(250 words limit)

an unexpected incident taught me responsibility



"Did you have trouble with the permission?" one of my friends asked while we were traveling to Mexico City. I had no idea what he was talking about. Then he explained that I had to get my parents sign me a statement along with other documents to leave the country without them. We arrived to the airport four hours before the schedule time of our flight to Thailand, but I didn't know if it was going to be enough time to get the documents ready. My parents were 800 miles away from Mexico City.

I was doing everything at the last minute. I searched on mailing services and posted on Facebook asking if anyone was coming in a flight from Delicias to Mexico within the next hours. Fortunately one friend answered and my parents gave him the statement signed. When he arrived I immediately went to the immigration service to get my permission sealed but then realized I had my passport copy missing. In a race against time I searched for a copy machine in the entire airport but found every office closed. I had to run ten blocks to get the copy from a stationery store. Finally, I entered the departure gate to find out the flight had been delayed one hour.

Since that incident, I make sure to do everything within the specified time and double or even triple-check if all is correct. I learned the significance of responsibility and now I apply it in everything I do.

A Mit student told me that it is better to focus on the situatuon rather than emphasize more on a later experience were I used the learning from that experience. I try to give the idea of how irresponsible I was by sentences like "at the last minute" or when i say i had the copy missing. I focus more kn something important that didn't go according to the plan to focus on the things i did to manage that situation, maybe my conclusion isn't that great about conveying the responsibility i have now. I only have 250 words and have read to use that space on the failure more than in the lesrning.
rnsnz18   
Jan 2, 2017
Undergraduate / How do you improve the life of others? MIT essay [8]

@Holt
Thank you, I will try to do it, in the last essay I tried to say that the contribution I made is get involved more people on math and help them to develop their abilities, I really believe that is a good contribution since many kids on my city are now very good at math and I think it is clear that with that they became better in math. However, I will try to add a sentence of something like " beyond the results my city have now on the math olympiad, my students had told me they became better on their math class and are interested on taking studying courses more related to science" I have one teacher recommendstion that says my contributions in the school helping low-grade students to get better in class (he sent me the recomendattion letter). So I wanted to focus more on the other part. I really think that was a made contribution because develop a talent you haven't had the resoures to do it means a great contribution to that person. I hope ant suggestion to transmit betyer that part on my essay.

Here is now my essay, i hope this shows now more my contributions to the community and math development of my students. [...]
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Scholarship / Academic excellence and character. Recommendation for a student to get Erasmus Mundus Scholarship. [3]

@Hthmn
What is wtobg with the letter is that your professor mentions a lot of qualities about you but never give stories about his relationship with you, tell him/her to just focus on a few qualities that he/she considerd are the most remarkable about you. This will help with the word limit because instead of waste space with lots of qualities will focus in just a few and it will be better. Besides, in the firs paragraph your professor mention a lot of courses when it could be summed up to just say " accounting courses". Then change the next sentence to sonethibg like " His excelent performance on my courses is the best I saw among my students".

Tell your professor to share stories where it can be clearly inferred that you have a deep relationship with your professor and that cab prove the qualities your professor see on you.
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / How do you improve the life of others? MIT essay [8]

@Holt
Thank you for your critic, the other essays I have posted here that are related to math are from other applications, in fact in my Mit application this is the only that talks about math besides the essay about my major choice, this is my only community service and it means a lot to me, I will try to focus on what you said and cut out my satisfaction ofthe essay, as a math olympian a had to travel to another city because there wasn't trainings in my city, so i decided to start this math trainings ib my city, perhaps that can say more my contribution to the community? I will restructure my essay beggining with that and post it here, I'd love if you review that too.

""Can you explain it again professor?" I feel weird when the kids call me that since I'm hardly older than they are, but I love what my title means in their academic development. Throughout my career as a Math Olympian, I always had to travel two hours to ...
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / Brown Supplements: Why studies; places you've lived; community you've been a part of [2]

@agoldie
I really liked your first essay, it shows you have a passion for literature, the second one I really dont know if they just want a description or if there is a better way to approach that essay, maybe if you share an experience about where you live will make it more memorable. For the third one, the first paragraph seems a good introduction, but in the second one you should explain why it made you a leader, since think that is the quality that shaped you. Your last two senteces are the ones with no relevanve and you should change then for emphasize on your leadership
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / Barnard Supplements - my need to be in an empowering, tight knit community of ambitious women [3]

@agoldie
You write pretty good, but the content of your essay miss some important things. First, the prompt says why Barnard would be a good match for you, and you just focused on the things you like about them, but you have to say also experiences about yourself that shows why are you interested on them, they now how good they are, you need to tell them how good YOU are, and tie those things with specific things offered at Barnard . You mentioned some good things about them that show your interest, but please cut the third essay, you just talked about the environemnt of the city, which you can encounter in many other cities. You should focus on the unique things that Barnard has and that you couldn' encounter in any other College.
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / My second family - Rice cultural perspective essay [2]

@calypso14
Firts I would like to suggest you to restructure the introduction, all sentences seem kind of cliche that many the reader will see thousands of times. It's good but try to be a little more unique, your second paragraph it's really good. But the third one I feel that you add more charasteristics of yourself that don't have a proof with a background story, try to say an experience that show how you acquire those perspectives. Finally, try to mention Rice specific comments, special things offered at Rice that will get benefited by your perspective, not only general things that you could bring to everywhere.
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / How do you improve the life of others? MIT essay [8]

... Describe one way in which you have contributed to your community, whether in your family, the classroom, your neighborhood, etc. (250 word limit)

mathematical Olympiad enthusiasm



"Can you explain it again professor?" I feel weird when the kids call me like that when I'm still a teenager, but I love what it means to be their professor and help them on their academic development. Throughout my career as a Math Olympian, I've never had to pay a single cent to any of my professors. They get involved just for the love of the project and infected me with the same enthusiasm to follow their steps. Now I also encourage the kids in my community to participate in the mathematical Olympiad.

I feel the necessity to share what I learned and help my students to success on the Math Olympiad. I teach them every weekend, and more than just a class, I like to create a work environment where all get benefited with the others ideas to solve a math problem. I don't only guide them through the path to solve a math problem; I also guide them in the process to do what it takes to stand out on the contests. I share my experiences and motivate them to work harder.

Throughout the classes, I have created a strong bond with my students and now I see them as my children. I don't only want them to be great mathematicians; I want to see them become better persons. When they receive their medals on the competitions, I feel pride and happiness seeing the smile on their faces. I couldn't have a better reward than that.(249 words)
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / Exciting roomie and wonderful music. Stanford Supplementary [7]

@digestadonut
Glad I could help:), We still have four days for this stanford application, I will post maybr tomorrow or in two days my resoponse to this three essays, I'd love if we stay in touch here and help each other.
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / Lafayette supplemental essay: I read so I can listen [4]

@ngokhoa99
First for your word problem, in your first, second and last paragraph you give too many examples, specially on the last one when you mention the people you can't talk to. Besides, it will be better to stay with just one example and deepen on why you are interested on that one and how it makes you want to underdtand people. Look at the prompt again. They ask for passion and not just involvement. I can see you really like to understand the point of viee of others. But i didn't feel your passion enough, if your essay transmit the passion to the reader so then the reader feels even passionate about your activity, then you will have an excellent essay. Please try to emphasize more on why you find pleasure in that activity.
rnsnz18   
Dec 31, 2016
Scholarship / The greatest leader is not necessarily the one who does the greatest things - Ronald Regan [3]

@mahmoud18
I believe this is for the princeton supplemental essay?, I think it's good your first sentence of the essay as it shows how you interpred the prhase of ronald reagan. Forgive me if this sounds harsh but i think that was the only good thing. Your essay you just say over and over the first sentence but with other words, you just talk about general qualitues of a leader, of course it is good to have them, but you need to deepen more aboutyou. You're also making the mistake of telling and not show!. Give a story, I believe the one with the boy scouts could show your leadership. Take in mind that the story of a scout leadet is one of the most commons of expresing a leadership role, si try to be unique and stand out. In addition, when you aretelling a story talk inthe past sense, don't combine past sense then present sense andthen past again, like how you did it on your fourth paragraph and other parts of your essay. I really believe you should write your entire essay again, and focus on just one story and jusy a FEW qualities of your leadership, emphasize on them, show your deep involvement in these qualities and how you acquire them, dont just say a lot of qualities and worse not giving proof with a background story. Please stay with this phrase "Show, don't tell" it really helps a lot to make your essay more interesting and convince the reader about what you are saying
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / Soaking up everything with an open mind. Rice supplemental essay - My international experiences [4]

@kc1099
Thanks for your critic!!, well at least I'm glad my essay shows what I wanted, about saying more things, in other essay they asked what things of rice motivated me to apply and there I mentioned joining their hispanic comunity at theur club SHPE and other things like that, I dont want to say it again here, do you think i should look for another club to join or something, or the combination of the two essays say it already?
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / Soaking up everything with an open mind. Rice supplemental essay - My international experiences [4]

The quality of Rice's academic life and the Residential College System are heavily influenced by the unique life experiences and cultural traditions each student brings. What personal perspective would you contribute to life at Rice?

being absorbed by different cultures



What happened to your accent? My sister asked me one time when we were talking through Skype. Every time I returned from a trip I ended with a weird combination of accents in my speaking, but also with a combination of many cultures and traditions. I've had the pleasure to visit several countries and witness the wonders that each one of them has to offer. From the marvelous Patagonia of Chile to the terrifying castles of Transylvania, each journey comes with incredible experiences and learnings that have shaped me as an open-mind person.

I overcame my fear of heights when I climbed a volcano in Costa Rica; I left my comfort zone in Hong Kong when I had to learn to use chopsticks even if it took me two hours to eat. I even was part of a Buddhist ritual in Thailand though it isn't my religion. I just adapt to the situation of each place, embracing the culture of the country I'm visiting. But when I leave, the people I met acquire a new perspective as well. They have now the Mexican culture in their heart.

My personality is a reflect of the Mexican culture, and I'm not talking about a person who loves tacos and plays mariachi songs. I'm talking about our charisma and love for helping other people. Once I had a tourist guide in Thailand who told me I made her change her vacations plans, and not for meet the landscapes of my country. She said she wanted to immerse herself in an environment of Mexican people.

When arriving to Rice, I know I will keep satisfying my sense of adventure and love for meeting people from different cultures. I will accept every challenge that the next four years can present and also help my classmates to overcome theirs. Whether it's just break the ice sharing a funny experience or contribute with a different point of view to solve a problem, I'll make sure to bring my learnings to Rice. I will look for new experiences and I'll have no more fear to face the troubles I can encounter during my education.

Throughout my career in Rice I'll make sure to carry my Mexican roots and make the same impact on my classmates that I made on that Thai Guide. I'll do my best to make unforgettable the pass through University of my friends and learn from their traditions to make mine unforgettable too.

I'll appreciate any suggestions to my essay, I hope it really shows the perspective i can bring of make an impact with my personality and my persoective of face everything with an open mind.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / "The Fainter" - Undergrad supplemental essay about a challenge [3]

@nilen
Your essay it's pretty good, I liked the way you introduce the story. Let's just avoid cliches like " I was more than ever determined to overcome my fear to face an audience again", it is obvious thst you did thay when you explain it in the rest of the essay, besides, the reviewers will ser sentences like that thousands of times. Or when you say "I knew I had improved". I hope you can realize what kind of sentences I'm refering to, insead of doing that jus let the reader reflect thay by himself, It will be better for your essay
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / Exciting roomie and wonderful music. Stanford Supplementary [7]

@digestadonut
First let me tell you that if you have a deep inviovement in music and piano and have achievemnts on that then you are in a better position than the other applicsnts, if you compete in piano at an international level well you will impress stanford, my applicstion to stanford and all the others is sort of like yours, but with a math passion, I still haven't done the essay of what matters to me, but I would suggest you to change the topic because you already proved that piano matters a lot to you, although here you say that what matters to you is make an impact with your music performances, you can say it in other sectionss, even in the common app essay you did about piano, just adding this, but not making a whole essay about it. So in this one show them something unique, but not piano, you already impressed them on that, the other two essays seem good to me, in the first one I made you a suggestion on another post.

But really, do not try to be well-rounded, you will look that most of the applicants, I have done my essays all related to the mathematical olympiad, but I tried to sho some different qualities that I learn on that experiences, something not related to math. I believe you have learned many meaningful things thanks to playing piano, show one of them on the essay, but not the passion to piano itself.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

@Holt
I deleted the third paragraph and add just a sentece on the fourth paragraph thay I wanted to keep from the paragraph I deleted.
My essay now really looks how I wanted and shows whay I feel about Baymax, thank you for the suggestions.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

@Holt
Glad i could developed a good essay about this, I thought the third paragraph made a transition with the second one with the story about the first time I met him waiting in the classroom, but I did see the point you made by deleting the third paragraph, perhaps some adjustments to the content of the third paragraph to make a better transition? Or do you really believe it is the best just delete it and submit the essay exactly with the other 5 paragraphs?
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / Things I've done during my gap year - working in the paints store [6]

@Holt
Thank you very much, your "wow" means a lot to me, i will make those changes you suggested, I think you're right about the english matter, my toefl score should talk by itself. I wonder how well you know the mit admission process, i still have two more essays to do, the one with the world i came from and the one with a challenge i faced, those are due to january 1st so i will post them tomorrow to see what i can improve about them, again, thanks a lot!.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

@Holt
Here is my new essay, I left many things the same but added the introduction about me and a better conclusion (I think) about my math development.

When I entered the mathematical Olympiad I did it with passion and interest since the first day. I even cried my first year of participation when I didn't pass the regional stage. I didn't know why it happened; I had put my best effort in the trainings offered before the test and loved every class given by the professors of the Olympiad. But later, another teacher would made me realize why.

I still remember the first day I saw Manuel Diaz or "Baymax" as we call him for the funny shape of his body. As I was impatient waiting in the classroom, the older students kept increasing my eagerness by commenting how great Baymax was. He was well known for his contributions to the Mathematical Olympiad in the state, the founder of this Project in 1992 and one of the bests Math professors in Mexico.

When Baymax entered the classroom, he started talking about the value of the Olympiad and continued all the class saying the fundamental keys to excel on it. Surprisingly, Baymax never put us a Math Problem or even talked about Mathematics itself and never did it on future classes neither. Yet, Baymax is the most influent teacher in my development on the mathematical Olympiad, even more than the professors who did taught me math. Baymax said that convince the students about the significance of increase the study hours at home was more important than giving just a math class. He dedicated his classes to motivate us and inspiring us to work harder.

Baymax frequently projected TED talks videos and later pondered about their content. The "Marshmallow test and instant gratification" is the one that most marked me. It's an experiment that gives a marshmallow to kids and if they don't eat it in 15 minutes they receive another one. Results show that the kids who didn't eat it were more successful than the ones who couldn't resist the temptation. Baymax explained that we constantly look for instant pleasure and we aren't willing to sacrifice it for a better pleasure in the future. Then he pointed the importance of making a balance between our time relaxing and time working. I have learned from Baymax that hard work plays an indispensable role in any kind of success, even more indispensable than pure talent. "90% work and 10% talent", that's what Baymax always kept saying. Since then, I started to study more at home; I acquired awork ethic that has been essential for my success in the Olympiad. Now every time I do something I ask myself if it is going to make me achieve what I want, not only in the mathematical Olympiad, but also in any personal aspiration.

Baymax changed the way I prepared for the competitions. Thanks to him, I found out that if I kept studying just in the math trainings like everyone else then my results would be the same or worse as the other contestants results. But I left all the idle activities at home and substitute them for study math, leaving just a few activities to entertain myself. A better performance on my mathematical competitions was pretty noticeable afther that.

Thanks to Baymax, today I'm a person that knows when to have fun and when to work for pursue my dreams. The way of thinking that sacrifice something today will give a better reward tomorrow has been my principal ally for my personal growth. I'm extremely thankful with Baymax for entering into my life that currently I commit myself to have a meaningful impact on other people too.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

@Holt
I really don't know how to thank you, I guess you have realized I had been posting several essays here, my deadline is January 1st, so these three days I'll be posting just a few more essays, for this essay, I will do that and post the new essay here, I guess that I need to delete the fourth essay and use the word space remaining to make the introduction and focus a little bit more on me right? Thank you very much for all the help, I hope you can give me a fibal revision after i post the nee essay here.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / Things I've done during my gap year - working in the paints store [6]

Thank you both!!
@Holt
I have wrote again the essay with the suggestions you made, you've been really helpful and as a result I had more space to add more things I did but couldn't add them because of the word limit (which is 400).I hope you can read my new essay and tell me if this works well now

I planned to be studying my first year of College right after High School, but 2016 has been the worst year for my family. My grandfather on both sides of my parents died last year. Since my dad worked for his father, he had to handle some financial problems that my grandfather left when he died. Needless to say, the unexpected death severely affected our finances so my father was only able to barely answer for our family's financial needs. Besides, my mother couldn't help my father because she developed a disease after his father died. That's why I had to delay attending college for a year. Since our finances have stabilized, I am now looking forward to attending college next year.

As I knew working with my father would take most of my time, I decided to take advantage of it. My participation there has helped me keep abreast of my academic education because I involved myself on the systems area of the business. For instance, I managed the billing, the inventory system and designed some advertising banners. Moreover, I implemented the bar code scanner so we didn't have to memorize the price of every item on sale. All these activities made me go back to look my computer science courses that I took in High School.

In addition to computer science, I have been studying languages as well. Now that my grandfather died, my aunt from Idaho moved with my grandmother and I had the opportunity to practice my English every time I visited her. Furthermore, I took the Basic Level of a French Course and I plan to continue with the Intermediate Level the next months.

My gap year also allowed me to have more time of study and improve my participation on two more mathematical Olympiads. The last one was the Iberoamerican Olympiad on September. After that competition, my participation as a Math Olympian ended but I continued solving math problems. I really enjoyed doing it, besides, it maintained my mind fresh on mathematics. I also have been continuing with my labor as a math trainer. As I had more free time, I dedicated myself to enhance these math trainings in the state, which resulted very well since my state won the national Olympiad this year.
rnsnz18   
Dec 30, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

@TVLAERE
Thank you for your suggestion, in fact I was expecting a comment about that, I do know that I need to talk more about me, I would love if you have any advice about how to empasize in my ethic of working hard and helping others.Also,at what point of the essay you think "okay now it's too much about Baymax", I think until the third pargrapgh it is okay and maybe I need just to restrucutre the fourth paragraph, do you think that would be fine? I know I'm asking too much, I hope we both can meet at princeton :p.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / MATHEMATICAL OLYMPIAD - Princeton: Baymax influenced me [10]

Tell us about a person who has influenced you in a significant way: limit 650 words, recommended about 500.

I changed the real name and nickname because i dont know if he feels comfortable with me sharing it.
I appreciate any advice about grammar content.

Baymax - Mathematical Olympiad



I still remember the first day I saw Manuel Diaz or "Baymax" as we call him for the funny shape of his body. As I was impatient waiting in the classroom, the older students kept increasing my eagerness by commenting how great Baymax was. He was well known for his contributions to the Mathematical Olympiad in the state, the founder of this Project in 1992 and one of the bests Math professors in Mexico.

When Baymax entered the classroom, he started talking about the value of the Olympiad and continued all the class saying the fundamental keys to excel on it. Surprisingly, Baymax never put us a Math Problem or even talked about Mathematics itself and never did it on future classes neither. Yet, Baymax is the most influent teacher in my development on the mathematical Olympiad, even more than the professors who did taught me math. Baymax said that convince the students about the significance of increase the study hours at home was more important than giving just a math class. He dedicated his classes to motivate us and inspiring us to work harder.

Baymax frequently projected TED talks videos and later pondered about their content. The "Marshmallow test and instant gratification" is the one that most marked me. It's an experiment that gives a marshmallow to kids and if they don't eat it in 15 minutes they receive another one. Results show that the kids who didn't eat it were more successful than the ones who couldn't resist the temptation. Baymax explained that we constantly look for instant pleasure and we aren't willing to sacrifice it for a better pleasure in the future. Then he pointed the importance of make a balance between our time relaxing and time working. I have learned from Baymax that hard work plays an indispensable role in any kind of success, even more indispensable than pure talent. "90% work and 10% talent", that's what Baymax always kept saying. Since then, I started to study more at home; Baymax helped me to acquire an ethic work that has been essential for my success in the Olympiad. Now every time I do something I ask myself if it is going to make me achieve what I want, not only in the mathematical Olympiad, but also in any personal aspiration.

My interaction with Baymax wasn't only on classes. Throughout my adolescence, Baymax has accompanied me in many experiences on Math competitions. On one national contest, me and my teammates hanged our medals around Baymax's neck and thanked him for the support he gave us. He immediately broked down in tears and said he did it with pleasure. Baymax is an emotional person that always cares for other people. He is now a friend for me more than a professor and he is always willing to help me if I need it. He has transmitted those attitudes to me and now I'm also helping to the beautiful project called Mathematical Olympiad. I'm doing my best to make the same effect on kids that Baymax made on me.

Thanks to Baymax, today I'm a person that knows when to have fun and when to work to pursue my dreams. This way of thinking that sacrifice something today will give a better reward tomorrow has been my principal ally for my personal growth. I'm extremely thankful with Baymax for entering in my life that currently I commit myself to have a meaningful impact on other people too.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Taxi drive in the New York City - Why NYU Essay [3]

@TVLAERE
Wow I dont really now what to say, it seems all perfect to me, your essay really shows your deep involvement with NYU, and your knowledge about what theu offer, it is also very good that you made the story with the taxi, that way the reader will find your essay more interesting to read.you said clearly why you fit in NYU and why NYU fits your interests, those are the to main points to apporach. GOOD WORK!!
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Beethoven's Opus 109 - Stanford Essay - Intellectual Development [9]

@digestadonut
I know how hard it is to deal with the word limit, i think some words of your second essay can be cut, one must be ready to sacrifice some sentences for others that would be better.Conclude with the idea that the decision of playing Opus 109 helped you to gain confidence on taking more challenging plays, just a sentence to make that conclusion, I believe you can cut words to make that conclusion fit.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Beethoven's Opus 109 - Stanford Essay - Intellectual Development [9]

@digestadonut
I really loved your essay!!, perhaps you're worried because it also seems that it can fit with the prompt " desrcribe a challenge you have overcome and how it shaped you", but your topic fits in this prompt too, maybe if you try to elaborate a little but more your conclusion about how it changed your intellevtual development you'll feel less worried and it will make a more memorable essay for the reviewer, but you already have an excellent work here.

I'm applying to Stanford too, Good Luck! And hope we both get admitted!
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Things I've done during my gap year - working in the paints store [6]

MIT Asks me what I have been doing if I'm not attending school right know, the world limit is 400, I don't think this essay really looks for a polished writing so I focused on explainong everything I've done. Thanks in

advance for any comments and suggestions.

the paints store experience



I alwas planned to be studying in College right after High School, but 2016 has been the worst year for my family. The decease of my two grandfathers significantly affected my family and our economic situation changed drastically. My father worked in my grandfather's business but it closed after my grandfather's dead. Since then my dad's been working in my uncle's paints business.

I decided not to start college this year and instead help my dad in his work, with his new job my father wasn't able to pay for my education and my mother can't work because of health problems Starting College one year later won't affect my education and taking this year off will help a lot to my family. Fortunately, the paints store is passing through a prosperity period and I hope to start College next year. As I know working in this store would take most of my time these months, I decided to help on the systems area of the business in order to stay fresh on academical issues. For instance, I managed the billing, the inventory system and designed some advertising banners. I also implemented the bar code scanner so we didn't have to memorize the price of every paint can or paintbrush. These activites made me go back to look my computer science courses of High School. Additionally, having access to the store's computer allowed me to take some of your free online courses like 18.01SC of Single Variable Calculus and 18.05 Introduction to Probabilty and Statistics, for the next months I'm planning to study the Introduction to Analysis course.

Although my time of Mathematical Olympiads finished after I graduated from High school, I've been solving math olympiad problems in my free time these months. During my period as a math olympian I saw solving problems more as fun than study for the contests, so I decided to continue doing this. Besides, it prevents me of getting rusty on mathematics. I also have been continuing with my labor as a math trainer. As I have more free time, I dedicated myself to improve these math trainings in the state, which resulted very well since my state won the national olympiad this year. Additionally, I've been practicing my english every day with my uncle and also I took the Basic course of a French Program and plan to take the Intermediate course.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Untitled - My Common App - Not one talent, background, or identity defines me. [4]

@scgoalie00
It is really good that you have comitted yourself to all those activities, but I really think the reviewers will be a little upset because you just put one paragraph per activity and then jumped to something entirely different. They are looking for depth rather than breadht, remember that, it is better that you focus on one of those avtivities and that way the reviewers will see your passion, I think that the editor one is where you could show more interest, it really has good points to talk more about.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / MATH - an amazing experience. Talk about an extracurricular activity [4]

MATH - an amazing experience



I was wondering which of the two essays works better, the prompt is elaborate on an extracurricular activity or job experience that was meaningful to me. It's for several colleges applications using the commonapp and the words limit is 150

Solve math problems, travel around Mexico and the world, make friends from other cultures who share my same interests, learn from successful mathematicians and encourage the learning of this science on kids, the Mathematical Olympiad has everything I love. I started this activity very young and have grown with it, gaining both knowledge and maturity. My first travel alone to a competition in other state was at the short age of 12, I can't imagine how worried my parents were. Most of my preparation for these competitions was studying at home but five times per year, there was a 10 days concentration in some city of the country, we studied math intensively every day and we still had energy to go out on nights and explore the city. In every trip I could forget everything and just focus on math, my friends and have fun. I'm really gonna miss it.

It's not just about memorizing thousands of theorems at home to solve the math problems of the contest. For me, it's enjoying amazing experiences while studying what I most love. The Mathematical Olympiad is my second home, where my family is my peers and professors distributed around the country. I'm always eagerly waiting for meeting with them in the national trainings that take place in different cities. When the time arrives, we study the whole day receiving guidance from the professor who is usually a former Olympian that always joins us on the games during breaks. At nights, we still have energy to go to explore the city. Finally, some students are selected for the international competitions and I have the pleasure to travel with my bests friends around the world. These experiences have helped me to gain maturity and a deep knowledge on math. I'm really gonna miss it.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Yale supplementary essay: Sociology and Library [2]

@wendyli328
I'd like to suggest something to your first essay, it is really good and pleasant to read, you have a special quality for writing. But maybe it would be good if you comment about some experiece you had or exposures that motivated you for sociology, not just talk about general things that you enjoy by watching the things around you, with your great imagination and excellent use of words you can create a stronger essay focusing in some experience.

For your second one, I think you can talk more about something of the things you read about yale's history, something more specific that match with your interests and something about yale that you will like to do there if admitted, I don't knowthe word limit but you really should focus on something about yale thay you want to be part of.
rnsnz18   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Duke, Why Trinity? : Program II, availability of choices [5]

@sd6599
No don't restructure your essay, the strenght of your essays is about the deep interest you have on their College, maybe look for any unnecessary word to be able to add maybe a sentence about whay can you bring to Duke, besides, you still have seven words left with that essay, if there is another section in thebapplication to talk about that then dont listen to my suggestion, your essay is really strong now, I just hope that suggestion can make it stronger
rnsnz18   
Dec 27, 2016
Undergraduate / "How did you do that?", 'I love mathematics' - MIT first two short essays [4]

@Crystor
I really appreciate your grammar corrections, english it's not my native language so I can have mistakes sometimes, I'll try to make it more logical and transmit better my idea of satisfy my curiosity about magic. Besides this little corrections, do you think that the overall essay it's a good approach for the prompt?, I really love magic and I hope it can be sensed by my essay, also it matches some things about my application about how curious I am and my passion for problem solving.

@Shamsher sing
Thanks for your suggestions, It's really good to hear that you liked the essay. You don't know how much time I spent figuring out which words to cut on the essay that I never thought the phrases you suggested to change had to be cutted as well. I would change it to more passionate sentences and things that no other applicant would say, Than you very much!
rnsnz18   
Dec 27, 2016
Undergraduate / Duke, Why Trinity? : Program II, availability of choices [5]

@sd6599
Very good essay, I'm not very sure how well can function the transition of combinations between the sandwiches and Duke Programs. It really seem that you've done your research about the University, this shows to the readers the interest you have in their College. I'm aware the short space you have to write because of the words limit, but in this kind of essays it's good to talk about why you love their College and why they should love you. You only focus on the first thing, perhaps you can say something you can bring to the Duke community so both you and Duke will be benefited by admitting you.
rnsnz18   
Dec 27, 2016
Undergraduate / "How did you do that?", 'I love mathematics' - MIT first two short essays [4]

We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do for the pleasure of it. (100 words limit)

"How did you do that?" , these words are music for my ears. Since I was little I told the same thing to magicians, it was easy to fool me and honestly I loved that. But I wanted to satisfy my curiosity and started to watch magic tricks in slow-motion. Anyone can be amazed by how many tricks have a mathematical explanation instead of a "sleight of hand". Unravel magic tricks and then master their performance became a passion for me. Now I have the pleasure to transmit the same sensation that I felt when I was younger to other people.

Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why? (*) (100 words or fewer

I love mathematics, my whole life I've been involved in activities related to this subject. Through my participation in competitions I've been interested in the combinatorial problems and conferences offered by famous mathematicians like "The mathematics of Doodling" by Professor Ravi Vakil on the IMO Lecture. Talking with him and contestants from other countries I've found myself immersed in the maths world, which is why I'd love to be part of your Mathematics Department in applied combinatorics. I find very exciting how your UROP can help me to obtain experience and make contributions in the field before even graduating.

I find a little hard these essays because they have to be very short, I feel like I don't transmit the excitement I have about magic and mathematics in the essays, any advice will be very appreciated it!

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