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Posts by Arun0506
Joined: Jan 6, 2013
Last Post: May 5, 2014
Threads: 27
Posts: 120  
Likes: 34
From: Singapore

Displayed posts: 147 / page 2 of 4
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Arun0506   
Feb 3, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2: Changes in life [5]

we adjusted ourselves

We adopt ourselves

When we secured our first job offer, we got to know

During the first day of office in our career, we enter into a new environment with all new faces around us.

I feel you do not have issue with your grammar usage. Please try to rephrase your writing with the above structure. Good Luck!!!
Arun0506   
Jan 30, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Influence of Colours in humans' feeling [10]

Thanks znack and Vijay.
Vijay,
I dont think it is necessary to mention any research names in Introduction and to be honest I am not aware of any research name :-) to say.
Arun0506   
Jan 29, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task2 : People reluctant to changes. What are the issues and possible solutions? [2]

People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kind of problems can this cause? What solutions can you suggest?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Journey of life is generally a collection of inevitable changes in which people happen to face both positive and negative trends. However, it seems increasing number of people are highly reluctant to experience new challenges in their routine activities. In my personal view, due to such prevalent practice, people often appear to be struggling with wide-range of problems in various aspects over the period. But, such issues can be addressed with proper education and adequate guidance which may help people to obtain confidence in their life.

Firstly, people who are restricted themselves to move out from their comfort zone, often fail to realize their own potential. Therefore, it is adversely affecting their career growth in workplace. Secondly, as a result of being involve merely in monotonous activities, opportunity to learn current system is largely become inaccessible. For example, in particular, software professionals tend to keep improving their technical skills in accordance to the current market's expectation. Because, failing to do so, results in losing their jobs over the period.

However, there are various solutions which can be rolled out to prevent people being away from transition. Government has a greater responsibility in addressing this alarming social issue. It should impose good standard of education to students in order to face real-time transformations. Furthermore, people should be encouraged to learn new things and its benefits. For instance, there was a situation in India, when government officials not willing to work in a computerized environment, on contrary, to their clerical jobs. But, proper training made them to accept such changes and motivate them to utilize the convenient work-life balance.

In conclusion, I would say, by having above said solutions, rather than fearing about initial temporary struggle for any changes, people should have a mind-set of taking new challenges optimistically, in order to avoid difficult circumstances.
Arun0506   
Jan 29, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2: Resist change or Welcome change? [6]

Hi Alison,
I feel your could have been little better by following the below structure

1) Introduction : Hook message, Background/importance of topic and then your view about the topic
2) Paragraph 1: Possible issue arise because being resistance to changes
3) Paragraph 2: Possible solutions for to overcome such resistance in people's mind-set and little bit of benefit due to adopting changes
4) Conclusion : Summary of your body paragraphs and you prompt / view about resisting changes

Good Luck!!!
Arun0506   
Jan 28, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Advertisements are benefial to people or not ? [7]

Hi Dumi,
I was wondering why you have not yet commented on my essay for two days though I could see your comments on others post :-)

Thanks a lot for your valuable idea to manage the time. Today unfortunately I couldn't write anything since I worked on listening module.
Tomorrow I will try to practice your idea and let you know. :-)
Really thanks to God from my heart for make me aware of this forum and people here who are helping others despite their busy work and family responsibilities.'

Thanks to you once again :-)
Arun0506   
Jan 28, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Influence of Colours in humans' feeling [10]

Thanks a lot dumi and Fardhani for your comments. Really encouraging me to face the exam.

Dumi, Actually I meant the kids in the age group of playgroup and nursery in my first paragraph.
Arun0506   
Jan 27, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2 : Colour can affect human psychologist [4]

Hi Fardhani Putri,
Yes , I understand your point here. I am not an expert in writing but still I feel this can be given in different sentence structure.

May be like this or better than this --> Generally, people who are working in a place where huge variety of high contrast colours are in use for decoration, often find it difficult to concenrate on their work.

Let me know your thought.
Arun0506   
Jan 27, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2: Influence of Colours in humans' feeling [10]

Psychologists have known for many years that colour can affect how people feel. For this reason, attention should be given to colour schemes when decorating places such as offices and hospitals. How true is this statement? How far does colour influence people's health and capacity for work?

Research shows that colour is one of the most significant factors which create greater impact in one's mind-set. In my personal view, I too agree with the statement that colours do have the potential of influencing people's feeling to a larger extend. There are numerous evidence available in support of this position to describe here.

To begin with, children are very much attracted by bright colours such as red and blue. Indeed, there are various scientific work proves that educating children in a colour ambience naturally enhance their observation capability. Due to this psychological fact, almost many kindergartens and nurseries are appeared to be more colourful in order to cover the student's attention. Furthermore, during working days people normally prefer to be in solid colour formal attire, whereas, in parties people usually like to wear high contrast dress which is well known for creating celebration mood.

In addition, colours also play a major role in painting buildings such offices and hospitals. Generally, hospitals seem to be in white in order to represent silence and cleanliness. Therefore, patients' trend to be confident about the treatment provided and feels mentally healthy. Similarly, when it comes to office environment, it is mostly painted with light contrast colours which is believed to create a fresh thinking in the midst of overwhelming work pressure.

In conclusion, I would strongly support with the view that definitely, colours have significant psychological influence on people's mind and I believe everyone can easily accept this position with above given details.
Arun0506   
Jan 27, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2 : Colour can affect human psychologist [4]

Fardhani Putri
This statement is not clearly giving the meaning

Generally, the people who work or stay in a room where too much colour as decorating has,

and for intro, please follow Dumi's above suggestion.

Good Luck!!
Arun0506   
Jan 27, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Televisions are the most favorite media for comunicating [8]

Hi Fardhani,
I believe this question has three types of communication media and you have to support one among them as a most popular communication media.
In that case, you have to specify them separately in and support the same in you essay. or else if you are comparing all three . There is no good supporting statements for radio.

Regards,
Arun
Arun0506   
Jan 25, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Advertisements are benefial to people or not ? [7]

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Nowadays, increasing number of people are highly influenced by advertisements which is also act as a major deciding factor in order to purchase an item in the market. This widespread trend creates different opinion among different group of people. Some people believe that advertisements are significantly helping them to explore the market and to obtain necessary information about new products, while, others think that these advertisements merely causing them to spend more money lavishly without having actual necessity. In my personal view, in order to be knowledgeable on current products and various latest promotions, advertisements are largely beneficial.

First of all, in today's context, people don't have time to roam around the market to identify their best suitable product. In that case, advertisements can help people to aware of various brands available in market and enable them to distinguish their best suitable products in terms of quality and budget. Secondly, people can be constantly aware of the latest promotions which will help them plan their purchase to save money rather than spending regular price on different brands. For example, budget airlines especially Tiger Airways use to release many good offers like "Pay for One-Way and return for free" in flight fares, but for limited duration of booking period. Therefore, without advertisement people cannot utilize such highly beneficial deals.

Another supporting factor in favour of advertisement is knowledge about new innovations. Due to ever-growing technological improvements, electronic devices and home appliances have undergone major disruptions. Again, advertisement is the only fastest way to promote such new features among people and help them to lead a comfort living by using latest sophisticated appliances. For example, nowadays smartphones gains tremendous popularity among people, only because of advertising its significant features and its benefits.

In conclusion, advertisement is a significant thing which is useful for both producer and consumer by catalyzing the business and purchasing the good quality products in a better deal respectively.
Arun0506   
Jan 25, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS; what people say about advertisement? [7]

Hi Fikri,
As dumi said do not narrow down you scope in the introduction itself
In several parts of this country, ----> instead you can use " In many countries" " Nowadays " " In this modern era" or " In today's context"

companies to improve their income by encouraging societies to buy their products --> You cannot say income here, rather you can say " In order to increase company's profit, advertisement is a tool to promote their product among people"

This is because they only pay more attention with how much they could get customers as many as possible. So, they never pay attention with the societies who watch their advertising on TV.

This above statement seems to be repetitive and also not relevant enough I feel.
Arun0506   
Jan 19, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 General: Job application for a waiter position [9]

Thanks Pahan. I will take of such typo errors. In my view, people who have prior practical experience will have more chance of grabbing the opportunity. Hence I have mentioned as if I have real time experience already in addition to be a student of Hotel management.

If I use "working part-time in your hotel would enable me to gain practical exposure which would compliment my studies in a great way"

and "I would get an opportunity to translate the theory that I learned from my course books on servicing customers"

will it suit for the rest of my letter about prior experience as it is mandatory to include them for this question.
Kindly correct me if I am wrong. Thanks.

But anyway thanks for your sentences, which I can make use of them in my other writings :-)
Arun0506   
Jan 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2: Best farming methodolgy : Current modern or traditional [6]

Thanks tiaDS.

Dumi, Happy to hear some good words from you, which in encouraging me further to perfect my writing. I agree with your intension to help others. Definitely I will also contribute from my part to help others through my knowledge which I am gaining from this forum. But the fact is that I am not confindent enough with my grammartical stuffs and I am afraid that I shouldnt give wrong guidelines to others. Let me complete my IELTS exam which is on Feb 1st 2014 and then I will start helping others in a better way. Kindly advice ,me how to proceed further in this forum to help others. You can email me as well.
Arun0506   
Jan 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2: Best farming methodolgy : Current modern or traditional [6]

Kindly help me in the below writing.

Topic: Write about the following topic: In recent years, farming practice has changed to include methods such as factory farming and the use of technology to improve crops. Some people believe these developments are necessary, while others regard them as dangerous and advocate a return to more traditional farming methods. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

In this modern era, the field of agriculture has undergone significant changes in various aspects especially in the farming methodology. Some people argue that new innovative methods of cultivating crops are necessary improvements, while others advocate that these disruptions will lead to deterioration of mankind and it is always better to stick to the traditional way of cultivations. In my view, adopting dangerous innovations are not going to be the best practice to obtain benefit.

To being with, people those who believe in modern methods in farming industry claims that sophisticated machines and high potential fertilizers have helped them yield huge productivity with less time and effort. For example, tractor like vehicles is really helping farmers in ploughing the agricultural land and shipping the crops to market in a better way. These innovations significantly reduce the farmers' effort and time. Finally, considering the ever-growing population in this world, pursuing innovative method of cultivation is highly necessary to meet the food demand in future.

However, though numerous benefits were portrayed in favour of existing new farming methodologies, there are much more hidden drawbacks which can be overlooked. Firstly, usage of fertilizers and insecticides will adversely affect the soil fertility and lead to produce low nutrients food crops and vegetables. Consequently, people those who consume such low quality food items substantially lose their immunity. For example, research shows that life time of current generation people are comparatively lesser than the earlier generations.

To conclude, quality degraded food crops are no way acceptable as a substitute for the food with proper nutrients. Hence I strongly suggest that harmless traditional method can only give healthy long living to people
Arun0506   
Jan 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2: farming methods [7]

Hi,
I am not good enough to comment on grammatical errors. But I can help you in certain area of your writing.

I will start off by looking at some reasons why many people believe such agricultural methods . Firstly, there is no denying that these new ways of farming are less time-consuming and more convenient

To begin with, people those who argue about adopting the new method of cultivating crops claims that the usage of modern machines and fertilizers have significantly increase the productivity in less consumption of time and effort.
Arun0506   
Jan 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 General: Job application for a waiter position [9]

You want to apply for the following job. Write a letter to Mr. Moore describing your previous experience and explaining why you would be suitable for the job. Waiter/waitress required for evening work. Some experience necessary.

Dear Mr. Moore,

I am Arun. I am writing to express my interest for an evening part-time job as a waiter in your well-established five start hotel "The Breeze International". Hereby, I am sending you my resume in which you can find the details about my previous work experience and the qualification.

Begin a hotel management student; I have a good knowledge about customer's expectations with respect to quality of services provided in the hotels. In addition to that, I have been working as a part-time employee in the hotel "Lee Royal Merdian" as a usher for the past one year where I experienced on, how well to greet the customer in a polite and friendly manner.

Moreover, I have excellent communication skill in both English and French which is an added advantage to rake care of foreign guest to the hotel.

Based on my prior experience and knowledge, I hope that I am well suited for the existing open position in your hotel.

Thanks for considering my application for evening waiter job.

Yours Faithfully,
Arun
Arun0506   
Jan 18, 2014
Writing Feedback / [IELTS] The traditional skills and ways of life dying out. [8]

Hi Tran,
One of my kind request to you. Please write the full question before you essay so that it is easy for everyone to understand what type of question it is and also people can give you good feedback about your writing. Good Luck!!!

Current teaching methods are likely to be theoretical and the participation in porcelain vases making, for instance, offers students a chance to understand and gain insights into the life of the elder generations. This activity, without a doubt, is more fun and probably inspires the youth to endeavour to conserve traditional values.

In this statement, I think the first statement is incomplete in terms of idea and without expressing your point who have introduce an example.
Arun0506   
Jan 15, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS; government´control on water´using. [11]

If the government controls clean water, the entire world will benefits --> If the government controls clean water usage, the entire world will be benefited.

Your writing is good enough in this two paragraph. Thanks for the sentences.
Arun0506   
Jan 15, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS; government´control on water´using. [11]

Hi Znack,
I feel the below introduction may be appropriate to express our postion / opinion.

Water is an incredible natural resource gifted by God, without which survival of any living organism highly impossible. Despite the fact, some people contend that they have full privilege to use fresh water without any restrictions, whereas, others argue that government's endeavor is needed to monitor the consumption of water. In my view, people should be considerate by not using water lavishly in order to avoid jeopardize circumstances.
Arun0506   
Jan 13, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children [8]

I am sorry Dumi. Though I understand what your are saying about the structure to follow in introduction. I somehow fail to reproduce in my writing.

I thought "Nowadays, it is common to see increasing number of children often affected by various diseases especially obesity whereas, generally old-age people seems have such diseases previously ." as the hook

and In this essay, we will explore the significant causes for obesity among young children and the possible measures to prevent it . to state my position or directing the reader by giving an idea about what I am going to talk in this essay.

Will try to improve further. Thanks for your patience in helping me to get required standard writing for IELTS
Arun0506   
Jan 13, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children [8]

Modern children are suffering from the diseases that were once considered to be meant for adults only. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes and what solutions can be offered?

Nowadays, it is common to see increasing number of children often affected by various diseases especially obesity whereas, generally old-age people seems have such diseases previously. In this essay, we will explore the significant causes for obesity among young children and the possible measures to prevent it.

First of all, increasingly majority of people tend to focus on becoming wealthy rather than being healthy. In the process of earning huge sum, people often fail to pay attention to their family life, in particular, children's unhealthy eating habits. Secondly, technology plays a vital role in encouraging adolescents to adopt sedentary life style. In addition, recent days schools emphasize more on academic curriculum and highly reluctant in motivating students to participate in physical educations and sports events.

In order to curb above said, the emerging detrimental conditions among children, certainly, government should rollout strict rules like standardizing school syllabus to have mandatory extra-curricular activities especially sports. Parents should take lead over their offspring, by providing balanced nutritional diet and shape them up be socialize with the family members rather than being addicted towards computer games. Moreover, parents need to interact a lot and spend more time with children by involve them in outer-door activities.

To conclude, lack of parent's attention towards children, rapid technological growth and disruption happened in system of education are the major items which pose challenge on children's health which could jeopardize their future. However, considering the above said action items could help our children to being away from obesity kind of diseases and could save our future generation.
Arun0506   
Jan 13, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1 General Training : Letter to landlord [7]

Thanks again Pahan and Dumi. Will follow the standard structure for letter writing as below

1) Introduce you to the reader if required in formal letter or (greeting in informal letter where intro is not required)
2) State the purpose reason for writing.
3) Fulfill the task requirements
4) Closing paragraph.

I hope the above structure is fine. Please correct me if am wrong.
Arun0506   
Jan 12, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1 General Training : Letter to landlord [7]

Thanks Sreesam for your time in evaluating my essay. I will make use your suggestions in my next essay. kindly help improving my writing Since I am going to take my IELTS exam on 1st of February. Thanks.
Arun0506   
Jan 12, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1 General Training : Letter to landlord [7]

Hi everyone, Kindly help me in finding my mistakes in the below writing

You are due to move into a rented apartment next month but you will not be able to because you have some problem. Write a letter to your landlord

Explain the situation
Describe your problems
Tell him when you thing you can move in


Dear Mr.Steve,
I am Arun. I am your new tenant who has signed a rental agreement for your apartment at 25, Creams road, block 258, level 6, Singapore two weeks before. I hope you could have remember me.

As per the agreement, myself along with my wife supposed to move in by next month 1st onwards. I am afraid I will not be able to occupy the flat as I had agreed.

Unfortunately, during my vacation to my native last week in India, I had met with an accident, which causes a severe injury in my back bone. Doctor advised me to be in bed rest for at least next two months from now. Due to my physical condition, I have made necessary arrangements in my office to purse my work from home.

However, I will definitely pay your rental amount without fail starting from next month. I believe, you don't have any issues with this regard.

I hope to move in to your flat at Creams road, starting from next to next month 1st.

Yours faithfully,
Arun
Arun0506   
Jan 12, 2014
Undergraduate / IETLS - Today's youth have more power and influence! [3]

To the first and foremost reason, the equality among people have absolutely improved over years. People, therefore, have more right of choices as well as decide their future lives.

This could be like
"First of all, nowadays elderly people tend to understand the value of equality among different age groups in our society, which in turns enabled every individual to choose their own future. "
Arun0506   
Dec 26, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS(Introduction)- Technology Vs Communication/Using Computer/Women in army [2]

Hi Everyone, Here is I am trying to prepare a proper introductions for IELTS task 2: Please let me know whether the below intros stick to format.

Please help me to improve this further or provide me more ideas which may help everyone here for IELTS prepartion

Topic: Technology is making communication easier in today's world, but at the expense of personal contact as many people choose to work at home in front of a computer. What dangers are there for a society which depends on computers rather than face to face contact for its main means of communication?

Nowadays, rapid technological growth provide way for increasing number of people to stay connected to this world via internet. As a result, many people, particularly software professionals, tend to work from home rather than go to workplace. Despite the fact of having numerous advantages by using computers and internet, we cannot overlook the drawbacks involved due to reckless utilization of the modern technology.

Topic: Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children.
Do you agree or disagree?

Research shows that children become highly passionate towards computer which led them to spend very long hours every day and it has become a part of their routine. Though there are numerous benefits which children are obtaining from the computer today, there are, however such an intelligent device also has negative effects on our children which we cannot overlook.

Topic: Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Historical events prove us; ancient women were participated in all defense activities in order to protect their community from rivals. Nowadays, increasingly band of people think that women should be encouraged to take part in defense forces t serve their nation. Whilst I totally agree with the view and I believe this to be a progressive move towards equality among both gender.

Topic: Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Journey of life is made of inevitable changes, in which people experience positive and negative trends. Some people may want to carry on their life with new challenges over a period; however, there are people who are reluctant to accept any changes in their routine activities. In my opinion, every individual should be willing to take up potential transformation in their life in order to become successful a person.
Arun0506   
Dec 23, 2013
Writing Feedback / enthusiastic generation; Who brings up the children: Parents or Teachers [6]

Question : Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Beyond doubt, enthusiastic younger generation is believed to be the future heroes of the society in every nation. In my opinion, both parents and teachers have their own role play in nurturing each child. In this essay, I will explore the responsibilities of the parents and then the teachers in bringing up a better citizen for this society.

To begin with, parents are the sole authenticated person who should teach their offspring to distinguish good and bad around them. Certainly, for every child parents are their first role model from whom they will observe everything. By nature young minds are highly activated with sharp grasping power, due to which parents have to be cautious on their behaviour before their children. Qualities such as obeying others, being considerate and socializing cannot be expected from a structured curriculum like schools.

However, next to parents at home, as the children grow, they happen to spend more time in the school and have consistent interaction with teacher and other pupils. Therefore, the responsibility of inheriting the knowledge of interpersonal skills, problem facing tactics and identifying their talents are ultimately falls in the court of teacher. Finally children from various community and family-backgrounds gather in one place from education and admitted their future only in the hands of teacher who is definitely expected to the potential contributor in providing efficient human to this society.

As a whole, from the above said points one can easily convince that both parents and teachers are essential people who have wide range of influence in shaping up the younger generation.

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