Writing Feedback / Is the criminality among youngsters caused by the lack of the social and emotional learning? [2]

Recent figures show an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18. Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for this is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
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More attention should be paid on how young people get involved in a criminal action. Many a person thinks that the number of crimes has increased among youngsters below 18 years old. While it is utterly true to some extent as their parents are very busy and their teachers only focus on subject school, other people argue that increasing the number of crimes is happened because young people are influenced by their friends, environments, and media. However, I totally believe that senior citizens should be involved to tackle this issue.

In modern era, there are many aspects can affect young people in their lives. Firstly, young people are usually influenced by their colleagues. They play together and follow what their friends do. Many severe impacts will happen to young people if they do not have control themselves such as drugs. Secondly, a place where young people living also can bring a negative side. For instance, if they live around alcoholic environment, they will be a drunker. Thirdly, mass media give some negative effects. For example, many young people can access much information from internet, including pornography website. It is harmful to them and makes their knowledge become limited.

On the other hand, parents and teachers should be responsible to this problem. Many teachers only focus on the subject materials. Never do they care about their student's behavior. It is very essential to know pupils activities. Likewise, most parents are busy people. They work every day and never do they know what their children do in the school or in the environment. Rarely do they meet each other. Children have a little care from their parents. Hence, young people have opportunity to do a criminal.

For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that while there are several factors can make young people do a crime activity, parents and teachers should give well education to young people. It is imperative that older people in every place should encourage young people to be the best person in their lives.

Writing Feedback / Mobile Phone's Market Share; BenQ fell significantly from 4.9% in 2005 to 2.4% in 2006 [2]

The table gives information about the market share of worldwide mobile phone sales between 2005 and 2006, and it is measured in percentage. Clearly, it can be seen that while four mobile phone companies showed a decrease proportion of share, three others experienced an increase figure within a year. However, Nokia's company was the highest market share in the world.

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  WorldWide_Mobile_Pho.png
  

Writing Feedback / More attention should be paid on how people live - the society, people migrates from place to place [2]

In the past, people usually stayed in one place throughout their lives. These days, people move more around. They often live in several places in their life time.

Agree or Disagree?
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More attention should be paid on how people live. Many a person thinks that people in the past were more likely to live in a same place. While it is utterly true to some extent as they wanted to be close with their families, other people argue that people today tend to move to other places because they want to improve their quality lives. However, I strongly believe that living in the many places is difficult for some people.

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Writing Feedback / Today, there are a lot of kitchen utensils available in the market, which people can buy. Quick food [2]

Nowadays, food becomes easier to prepare. Has this changed improved the way people live?

Yes or No
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More attention should be paid on how instant food can change people's lifestyle. Many a person thinks that it is easy to prepare a meal at the present time. While it is true to some extent as many inventions are found to help people accomplish cooking activities such as rice cooker and microwave which can make their lives more relaxed, other people argue that eating fast food is more likely to be harmful because people do not know about the food nutrition especially when they eat meals in restaurant and fast-food outlets. However, I totally believe that this improvement affects the way of people's lives.

Today, there are a lot of kitchen utensils available in the market, which people can buy. This helps people to prepare food instantly. Firstly, rice can be cooked with the rice cooker in 15 minutes compared to a conventional cooker which usually takes half an hour. Preparing rice with this advanced technology makes people much more comfortable because they do not need to do manual check even if the rice is well done. Secondly, microwave can be used to maintain the food warm so as that this cooked food can be consumed more than twice. Unless this way works effectively, then people will not have free time, such as reading books and watching television.

Apart from these tangible benefits, it is believed that instant food is a key factor of chronic illness since this is consumed too much. A 2012 Oxford University pointed out that 85% of people in Singapore, who consume meal in food shop regularly like Mc Donald and Pizza Hut, face a health problem such as obesity, cancer, and diabetes. It happened because never do people concern about the fast food nutrition. It is widely recognised that the instant food can be harmed to the humankind.

For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that although sophisticated devices can make people's lives much more uncomplicated, preparing natural food is much better because people can control the nutrition so as to make them healthier. It is imperative that people should take into consideration on their high-quality food as this affects people's body conditions.

Writing Feedback / The process of pencil making from graphite and wood [3]

The diagram presents the two processes of pencil making. Clearly, it can be seen that the process divided into two stages. Although the process of pencil cases shows many stages, the process of pencil leads were more complicated.

Firstly, pencil leads are made by mixing ground graphite, clay, and water together. Graphite dough is resulted by its process. Afterwards, the graphite dough is pressed into the forming press, and graphite rod is come out. Following this, the graphite rod is cut by using a small saw to get the leads. The leads should be dried in the oven with heated level of 800 degree Celsius. After the heated step, the leads are placed in the wood grooves.

Secondly, pencil cases are made by cutting wood on the saw machine. These wooden slats are shaped with grooves cut to make the slot for the pencil leads. Each slat is grooved, and the leads are glued on to the groove. Slots are put on the previous slats containing leads to produce 'sandwich' of slats.

Finally, the 'sandwich' of slats is shaped to the shaping machine to create smooth finish. Afterwards, the finished pencil has been produced, and it is ready to use.

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  Pencil
  

Writing Feedback / Riversdale University's Map in 1973 and in 2010 - IELTS Writing Task 1 [2]

The map illustrates the changes that have occurred in the campus of Riversdale University over a 37 year period beginning in 1973 and ending in 2010. The most noticeable change is the replacement of many areas with building and transportation facilities.

To begin, there were several major changes to transport in the campus. A tram stop and car park B have been built on the west of campus. While the river has remained, a bridge has been constructed on the south side of the river.

There have also been changes to the building facilities in Riversdale University. A student union has been moved to the west of campus. Although the library building has been extended, social science building and law building have been merged into one building on the south side of campus. Fine art building has been replaced with information sciences building. However, three buildings remained in the campus area.

The nature reserve has changed. Medical school will construct on the south side of the nature reserve and will be planned in 2019.

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  Riversdale University's Map
  

Writing Feedback / Changes in the proportion of online shopping to the film/music retail sector in New Zealand [NEW]

The pie charts compare the percentage of online sales on four different retail sectors in New Zealand between 2003 and 2013. Clearly, it can be seen that the greatest change was in the proportion of online shopping to the film/music retail sector.

In 2003, the most popular retail sector was travel, representing just over one third of all retail sectors, and although it was still a popular retail sector, by 2013 it had fallen to a quarter of the total. At 24%, clothes experienced the second most popular retail sector to sell, but this fell significantly to only 16% ten years later. Initially, online sales on the books retail sector showed fairly low, at only 19%. However, this figure increased dramatically over the ten years to represent the third largest proportion of online sales in 2013 at 22%.

More change was seen in the film/music retail sector. Online sales on its sector went up significantly to 33% in 2013. This figure represented the first highest percentage of online sales over ten years.

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  Online Sales
  

Writing Feedback / Firstly, when the rain falls, the dam is full for a period of time. How the rainwater is reused. [3]

The picture illustrates the use of rainwater for drinking and other domestic purposes. Clearly, it can be seen that the process is divided into three stages. While one stage can be recycled, other two stages is reserved.

Firstly, when the rain falls, the dam is full for a period of time. The water which is collected in the dam then is sent to water treatment plant using a pipe. The water is produced to be drinking water for household consumption.

The second is the household waste-water is used to produce drinking water. The waste-water is sent to the waste-water treatment plant. When the waste-water is purified, the excess treated water is sent to the river. The purified water is collected in the tank. Then, recycled water is sent back to the houses.

Finally, when the rain falls into the roof and water tank, the water is stored in the tank. The water which is collected in the tank then is sent to the garden. The storm-water is sent to the river via drain.

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  RainWater
  

Writing Feedback / Study once specialist subject or a series of subjects in universitiy [4]

[b]Some people think universities students should only study once specialist subject, while others think the universities should encourage the students to study a series of subjects in addition to the one subject.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Writing Feedback / Spend Money for City's Development - quality and a quantity of public service facilities [2]

Some people think that large, impressive buildings are important for a city. Others believe that the money should be spent on improving schools and hospitals.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
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More attention should be paid on how money should be spent for city's development. Some people argue that money uses to construct great buildings are significant for urban areas. Although this is true for some extent, thanks to having impressive buildings make the city more famous, other people think that money is weighty for build education and health institution in the cities. However, I strongly believe that increasing a quality and a quantity of public service facilities better than developing spectacular buildings.

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Writing Feedback / The wind turbine installation method and the optimum choice location of the tower [NEW]

Question:

The diagrams below show the design for a wind turbine and its location.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Answer:

The two pictures describe installing wind turbine and optimum site locations. At the first glance, it can be seen that there are several materials to design a wind turbine and some options to put it in ideal place.

According to the picture, the wind turbine needs sturdy tower that is built from steel. Before the tower was set up, need to be the installation of a generator at the top of the tower. To be able to measure wind speed and direction. Also, used wind sensor on the top of the generator. These sensors will provide information on computers which is nearby the tower to adjust its direction and angle. The blades are built from fiberglass or wood. The blades start rotating based on wind speed and direction. The energy has come to generator according to these blades. This generator changes from mechanical energy into electrical energy. This generator can produce 1.5 megawatts energy.

For the optimum locations of the wind turbine is in coastal areas, at the top of hills. The blades will receive maximum strength wind. In contrast, while the turbine can be set up near coast line, it gets less strength wind. However, domestic turbine can be placed on the hill and produce 100 kilowatts lead power.

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  Wind Turbin
  

Writing Feedback / Reasons for finding talented people [2]

Question:

Televised talent shows have become popular in many societies today. Are these shows a good method of finding talented people, or are they just entertainment?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Answer:

More attention should be paid on how to discover skilled persons from televised talent shows at present time. Most of folks argue that finding a proficient people through the talent competition which presented on television is only for fun. While this view is true for some extent, other people think that this is better manner. Consequently, I strongly believe that looking for highly competent people from televised professional shows is prime method.

Nowadays, we can find many aptitude contests in television. Usually, people who involve this competition are between 18 years old and 26 years old. However, sometimes several contests have no limit for age. There are various kinds of ability are counterpart. For example, singing is the most popular skill that often shown. People who have good voice will sing many genres of song, both of pop and rock. Other thing is comedian, it is known as "standup comedy", the contest that to look for a talented person in comedy. This is the funniest television show today. However, the winners of this program are mostly come from great quantities of short message service that their received from people who watched this contest. This is the drawback of televised talent show.

On the other side, finding skilled person usually should be through from many stages and hard selections. Start from first selection has a huge number of registered participants. More than 1000 people registered and come from many cities. Usually, they will be filtered until top 15 and go on to the next real contest in television. From the top 15, they were quarantined by committee of the competition. In their home stay, they receive training to improve their skill then they acquire more knowledge to increase their ability and talent. This is the advantage of the process on televised talent show.

For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that tracing professional humans from skilled exhibition in television is good method. It is imperative that the idea of televised talent shows is advisable to find out appropriate flair people.