Writing Feedback / Natural resource from outer space [2]

As Earth runs out of natural resources, we have started to look to space for solutions. However, some people argue that this is the wrong thing to do, and instead we should look for alternative solutions here on Earth.

To what extent do you agree with them?
What alternatives might there be to exploiting space for natural resources?

Natural resources on Earth are running out, and this occurs continuously from year to year. Experts seek out solutions in outer space. Nevertheless, it is not such an appropriate way to exploit resources in space. In this essay, I would agree that we should use alternative energy which is still available on the earth. Where possible, the use of asteroid from space to generate greenhouse gases and water as energy should be taken into consideration.

Basically, there are still many forms of renewable energy on the earth as alternative solutions, since its availability is possible to be developed. For instance, water and wind turbine should be improved to produce electricity. What is more, artificial energy can be obtained by synthesis reaction. To exemplify, biogas and bioethanol as fuel for transportation must be increased. Therefore, humankind have other energy resources. As a result, it supplies energy needs for human living.

Alternative resources can be gained from asteroids. It would be possible to generate greenhouse gases and water by firing large the ammonia-bearing asteroids. Benefit from this is that other forms of energy can be resulted in space and it is transported to the earth without containing pollution. However, it also has drawback when it exploits constantly which can result in imbalance for the universe. So, after shooting one asteroid, scientists should give the range of time to the next usage of asteroid.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that the earth actually still has alternative environmentally friendly energy and the consumption of these resources needs to be improved. It is possible to look for other energy from the space like asteroids, but the experts should take into account for using it more than one time.

Writing Feedback / Criminal record has actually increased in recent years [3]

Each year, the crime rate increases.
What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

Criminal record has actually increased in recent years. This has affected people on many levels, often generating fear and leading to victimization and over-reaction. This essay accounts for the reasons why crime occurs such as economic factor and unemployment. Some measurements like CCTV, job vacancy and the involvement of police officer are also clearly stated to cope with this matter.

As a matter of fact, criminal act is caused by two main significant factors. The predominant factor resulting in the crime initiation is economic situation. To exemplify, a poor father may not be able to deliver his children in school and lack of education may lead to juvenile crime. Another cause of the problem is mass idleness. According to Bureau of Labor Statistics, 6 percent of people at the age of 16 years old and over are included unemployment. Consequently, owing to these reasons, it is inevitable that crime statistics are continuously increasing.

As far as I am concerned, there are potential strategies to fight the criminal activity. Firstly, Closed-Circuit Television (CCTV) can be used as a crime prevention method. A study reported that CCTV was used in fifteen housing complexes for elderly residents in Manchester, England and this declined in burglary attempts of 79 percent across all complexes. Also, the provision of employment opportunities need to be improved by new work fields. Finally, police force has to be an important part in society in terms of reducing the crime rate. There should be an increase in the number of police officers in order to control over the offenders.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that although the crime is a serious problem, there are remedial measures which can be taken to diminish it. It is imperative that if the above mentioned measurements are taken into account, the root causes of the crimes can be decreased significantly.

Writing Feedback / The governments have a responsibility to provide welfare services [2]

All education and healthcare should be funded by the government and free for everyone.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The governments have a responsibility to provide welfare services such as healthcare and education for all their citizens. It is based on the notion of equal rights for those unable to meet their basic needs. In this essay, I chiefly agree that both sector should be completely free since it is related to well-being of society and increases standard of living.

The states need to take charge of medical care because it is a part of the social welfare system which can enhance the residents' satisfaction. For instance, the health department can guarantee the health of people with lower income or too poor. They eventually are entitled to emergency care without thinking of the high medical bills. In consequence, it is worth for the government to channel a proportion funding on health aspect.

What is more, free education should be provided by the states for every human being. It is convinced that people will have brighter future and improve their qualities of life. An illustration to this, a high-educated person will have more possibilities to obtain well-paid job in a great deal of work fields thanks to university degree. Without a doubt, people who have educational recognition can meet their own necessities through their occupation. Consequently, it is valued to invest money on education sector because an essential knowledge people gain from schooling can contribute back to themselves.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that free cost for both medical and educational field is sometimes a debatable issue, but the governments are completely responsible for the provision of financial aid on it. It is imperative that the states should render education scholarship for whom school fees cannot be afforded easily and vouch every inhabitant to achieve their rights on health service.

Writing Feedback / Alternative energy sources basically require more money [2]

Alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, waves and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport.

To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is assume that the implementation of environmentally and friendly energy resources like wind, waves, and sun are costly. This is aimed to reduce dependence society on fossil fuel sources such as coal, oil and gas as a power to city and transportation system. While this statement leads to a great deal of controversy, I would argue that alternative energy sources basically require more money to build its plants. This contrast to scientist who have developed plenty of research to create these forms of energy more efficient and it can generate much more power for the world's inhabitants needs.

Admittedly, a cleaner and greener alternative power consumes more money, since it is inexpensive to run, but high-priced to construct its infrastructure. In Britain, for instance, electricity from wind costs twice as much as that from conventional sources like coal, and nearly all the wind turbines are produced by a single firm. This, in a fact, is vulnerable to change the cost of energy consumption in the capital city. As a result, the government remains to extend the life of fossil resources to meet society's energy needs.

Standing in contrast, the vast number of the renewable energy resources must be expanded to diminish reliance on fossil fuels even though it digs deep to fund them. The main reason for this is that an enormous number of experts are continuing to research newer and better forms of energy. To exemplify, a new water battery which is being created at MIT will be able to power a car for hundreds of miles. Next, natural power stations provide more powerful energy. A study found that the use of photovoltaic cell for solar power plant could supply energy for more than one billion people by 2020 and 26 percent of global energy introduces by 2040. Therefore, this is sustainable and a viable solution in terms of producing power to cities and transport sector.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that alternative power sources are important to develop. It can also be seen that although the governments may totally spend more cost to construct alternative power plants, the citizens will obtain benefits from natural reserves for a long-term need.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Students choose to study English independently [2]

A huge number of students choose to study English independently on a self-study basis rather than attend a formal course. However, without the assistance of a teacher, students often find it difficult to manage their studies.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People's success is determined on how they are studying. For this reason, the majority of students are more likely to opt studying English lesson by themselves rather than to follow the instructional class. In contrast to this, there are plenty of possibilities to obtain poor quality of learning without teacher's guidance. A statement seems utterly true, but I would argue that the students choose a self-study method thanks to economic condition. Furthermore, it can affect the students' understanding because there is no fixed assessment of what they learn.

First, course fees sometimes become a hurdle so as that the students decide not to attend course. The pupils think that they can learn language acquisition with their own methods. Take one example, teachers at Kanda University of International Studies, Japan create a solution by implementing an independent English learning. The result of this effort is that 48% of the students feel they know how to study by themselves. Consequently, they have their own scheduled times, no fear of criticism from their friends when they are not good at English, and self-learning will bring effective cost.

Conversely, the difficulties cannot be prevented by the schoolchildren while they study without their teachers' instructions. It is because they cannot punctuate whether their understanding is true or not. To exemplify, when they attempt to figure out how to result good writing, they have to learn about using appropriate words and the accuracy of grammar in every sentence. As a result, they basically need guidance from their teachers.

From my point of view, the pupils still need teachers' help while they learn English. It is aimed to encourage the students in improving their skills continuously. They need not to feel uncertainty of what they learn.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that independent learning renders one of the methods for the students to set their times up well and opt what they want to understand. However, they should realize that even though there is a consideration to attend a course related to money, they will gain broadened knowledge and instructions from teachers in order to develop their English skills.

Undergraduate / TASK 2: Children are supposed to start their schools at the age of four [2]

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight.

How far do you agree with either of these views?

Education is the first aspect to create human's quality. For this reason, many countries implement a rule in which children are supposed to start their schools at the age of four. Yet, people in other countries assess that children have to begin education at seven or eight years old. While both views seem true to some extent, it is believed that children aged seven or eight should obtain formal education and young children need to develop their creativity in the golden age.

Children are easy to imitate what they notice from people's behavior. Through this way, they will improve creativity such drawing, singing, telling a story or even planting. Under the UK's current system, children start full-time school and the formal learning of literacy and numeracy at the age of four. However, experts say this is causing profound damage in a generation which is not encouraged to learn through play. As a result, the continued focus on an early start to formal learning is likely to cause danger for their development of creativity.

On the other hand, when children are at the age of seven or eight, they are ready to obtain some forms of school subjects. This is because their cognitive and motoric skills have developed perfectly in order that they can gain much information to be processed. A country like Finland, children do not start formal, full-scale education until they are seven. Consequently, children present the best performance in the class for understanding what they learn.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that it is better for children to attend school when they are at the age of seven or eight. It is undeniable that they have already to achieve some knowledge of school thanks to the improvement of their physical abilities and brain capacities. Therefore, it is imperative that education stakeholders in several countries should take into consideration for the ages of schoolchildren before they meet formal education.

Writing Feedback / Task 1: The bar chart compares the number of film rentals and sales [2]

The chart below shows the annual number of rentals and sales (in various formats) of films from a particular store between 2002 and 2011.
The bar chart compares the number of film rentals and sales in different sorts annually from a selected store during 2002 to 2011. Overall, after the annual number of DVD sales reached a peak, it decreased gradually. It can also be seen that while rentals and VHS sales fell considerably, Blu-ray sales appeared and experienced a slight growth.

To begin with, DVD sale was the lowest format of film. It stood at solely 500,000 copies. However, rentals and VHS sales showed the highest rate in 2002. In the next year, while both rentals and VHS sales dropped steadily, the annual number of DVD rose significantly instead. Then, after peaking at roughly 215,000 copies in 2007, the figure of DVD sales fell by 35,000 in 2011.

In terms of rentals and VHS sales, both witnessed a dramatic decrease. At the beginning, the annual rate of rentals was 185,000 copies this became 55,000 copies over the following nine years. This also happened for VHS sales in which its number declined from 85,000 (2002) to 10,000 (2005) and this format lost in 2006. But, in 2007, Blu-ray sales existed and it grew gradually to around 15,000 copies during a four-year period.

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Writing Feedback / There are four main features of the wind turbine - Task 1 [3]

The diagrams below show the design for a wind turbine and its location.

The diagrams describe a turbine to generate electricity from wind and three areas which are possible to obtain it. What stands out from the diagram reveals that there are four main features of the wind turbine. It can also be seen that the greatest place to produce electricity is in higher location.

First, the turbine consist of steel tower, blades, wind sensor, and generator. Fibreglass or wood is used for blades, whereas wind sensor has function as speed and direction controller. The first stage of the process begins when the wind turns the blades. Following this, the sensor at the back of the blades detects velocity and direction of the wind. Afterwards, generator connected with the sensor changes wind blow becoming electricity current (1.5 megawatts). In addition, computer is also used to receive data from sensor to display direction and angles of the blades and it is placed in house near by the tower.

Regarding to the location of the wind turbine, the turbine can be placed in the tower level of sea, but it does not generate the optimum electricity. Besides, the second alternative is in the domestic area where the turbine can produce 100 kilowatts of electricity. However, the most suitable area to gain maximum electricity is in plateau zone because its wind strength is more powerful than other places.

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Writing Feedback / Task 2: Nowadays, there has been a rapid progress of modern communication [2]

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, there has been a rapid progress of modern communication that has declined people's time to see their relatives. Although it is believed that this can give a detrimental effect on their social lives, there are also some benefits of the communication development.

Communication is closely related to convenient device which can be used to send email and messages. It affects the way of people to communicate with their friends. Research reveals that 20.3% of respondents in China tend to use text messaging as one of communication ways, and Australian prefer communicating by email, with precisely 12.5%. There is no doubt that the intensity of direct interaction among people becomes less and they are more rarely to meet face-to-face.

Conversely, as technology continues to change, the education world obtains an advantage of advanced communication such as student can be educated with technology usage. For instance, lecturers just need to ask their students to collect the assignments by using email, so they can check the task results immediately. What is more, communication technology allows people to keep in touch with their families or friends who may live farther away. Thanks to both benefits, the more advanced technology is, the more easily for people to communicate with others.

The aforementioned evidence shows that the impacts of communication technology address both positive and negative in societies' life. It is considerable to keep in mind that technological change is inevitable to find an optimal relationship, and this pattern is a continual process. Societal advancement relies on technology which have unanticipated side-effects that also must be mitigated by people.

Writing Feedback / Task 2: Living in rural area became choice of most people [2]

In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays, most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area.

What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community?

In recent years, life has changed and it is not like it was in the past. Living in rural area became choice of most people because they could know all their neighbors. However, these days and ages, people tend to stay in big cities in which they do not really know other people around them. While these views are utterly true, I would argue that living in a small community has many benefits rather than its drawbacks.

At first glance, city life actually affects to people's lives. People do not even know their neighbors because cities are lack a sense of community. As an example, they are more likely to do their own works than gathering to their societies to obtain togetherness. As a result, there is sometimes a gap between the rich and the poor in the society unconsciously.

On the other hand, people who live in countryside cannot avoid the disadvantage. They are hard to use the advanced technology or to afford communication well in sight of the limited signal. As an example, not all places can catch high signal of the internet or mobile phone. Therefore, there is a challenge in making decision to stay in small villages nowadays.

Despite staying in small community has drawbacks, it gives also an advantage like people help each other when one of inhabitants gains a current calamity. It can be realized by people that they will need helps from other people in unpredictable condition. A study shows that people in a village will be fast to give first aid with friendly behavior when their neighbors obtain the problems. In addition, people become more creative to create new innovation in rural areas. They attempt to build the technology which is related to develop those places. There is no doubt that so as to get more comfortable situation, a small village is option for people.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that living in a small community brings both the benefits such helping each other and the drawbacks like the difficulties to afford the convenient technology. Besides, city life restricts people to be involved in socialized activities. Regardless of the reasons, it is important for people to consider where they will live and socialize in the circumstance.

Writing Feedback / It is believed by most of people that work is the main part of their adult life [3]

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

It is believed by most of people that work is the main part of their adult life and they spend much time to do their work. However, the essential element of individual well-being is also determined by satisfaction when people do their jobs. Whilst the first statement is utterly true, I would argue that many factors contribute to job satisfaction, such as people work in an appropriate field and obtain suitable income from their jobs. Then, the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers is usually about the increasing of the income and the companies provide facilities which support people's lives.

The first factor which gives satisfaction is that people work in an appropriate field. People, for instance, work in field which is related to their educational backgrounds will produce the great outcome because they understand what they do precisely and attempt several methods to become experts in that field. Furthermore, another factor such gaining suitable salaries is really significant to improve people's comfortable at work. Also, people can complete their necessities with current income that they need. There is no doubt that job can deal with people's satisfaction through those factors.

Turning to the expectation of job satisfaction, people have a great expectation like to achieve the increasing of the income in particular period of their work. Moreover, the best dedication of people becomes a reason which they can get the huge hopefulness. Besides, people also think that the companies where they work will provide several facilities which can encourage their lives, such as house, car service, or medical insurance so as to improve people's performance at workplace.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that both factors such as people work in a particular field which they can show the professionalism in their jobs and achieve great income are a pivotal element to achieve well-being at work. I also strongly believe that the expectation of contentment toward jobs is more reasonable and related to an increase in salary and the attention of the companies for all workers.

Undergraduate / Nowadays, it cannot be avoided that the number of people gets the weight increase in many countries [3]

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing.
What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Nowadays, it cannot be avoided that the number of people gets the weight increase in many countries in the whole world. Besides, their levels of healthy condition and fitness are diminishing. These problems are caused by several factors, like unhealthy diet and malady lifestyle in society. Whilst these problem happen, I would argue that there are many ways to overcome it.

Firstly, the cause of the weight increase among people is unhealthy diet. People tend to choose fast junk food or well-prepared meal for instant time. This is owing to their crowded activities so that they have no much time to enjoy home-prepared meal. As an example, people are hungry, they directly go to restaurant to gain some meals and they do not care about nutrition and the amount of calories that they need within one day. In addition, malady lifestyle has affected their lives. Lack of exercise and habit such snacking over the limit make them do not realize the importance of health. As a result, their weight increases extremely without consciousness and brings many kinds of disease in the body.

However, there are ways to tackle those problems. People have to shift their bad habit by doing exercise three times a week minimally. Research shows that people who do some exercises routinely in a week will extend their life span and improve healthy life. Another way which people should do is consuming the healthy diet. They can choose organic meal to maintain health and they have to reduce or even avoid fast food in their daily lives. It is aimed to prevent the sorts of dangerous illness which spread out in the environment.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that consuming healthy diet and doing some exercise as a priority to improve health are the ways to decrease the weight or obesity of people and to keep health and fitness. People should recognize that health is the most important key in reaching and creating a successful life, without healthy condition people cannot do anything perfectly in their lives.

Writing Feedback / Nowadays, congestion and pollution problems have become parts of a country. [4]

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
What other measures do you think might be effective?

Nowadays, congestion and pollution problems have become parts of a country. Many people believe that increasing the price of fuel is one of the ways to reduce both of those matters. While there are other ways to solve those problems, I would argue that reforestation and increasing the vehicle tax are other methods to overcome the problems.

The main reason why intensifying the price of fossil fuel considered as the best choice is that people will cogitate about buying their private transportation. People, for instance, do not have intention to have their own cars when the fuel has high price and then this is like condition in which societies are really difficult to gain affordable price for vehicle's fuel. As a result, congestion and pollution will gradually less owing to the implementation of this way.

However, there is way such reforestation to subside pollution. Plants have important role to catch carbon dioxide that is produced by many kinds of vehicles. In addition, increasing the vehicle tax is an option to be done by the government. For example, the government make a strict regulation to pay tax where the tax is increased for people who have luxurious car. As a consequence, societies will choose public transportation to go everywhere and pollution can be diminished through creating the city park and reforestation.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that fuel is needed to increase its price, to lessen traffic jam and air pollution. However, reforestation is also one of the choices to reduce pollution and increasing the vehicle tax can be organized by the government so people realize that they have a significant role to cope with these problems as well.

Writing Feedback / The advanced technology has given influence to the interaction way among people. [2]

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology.
In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make?
Has this become a positive or negative development?

The advanced technology has given influence to the interaction way among people. Technology causes changes of the sorts of relationships people have. They have different ways to make communication to one another. This actually gives a positive development, even though it sometimes results the drawback.

Communication can be done by many ways. People acquire ease to do conversation to others in a long distance by using some applications which are offered by technology. Not only can people use mobile phone, but also access the internet to call their families or friends. The more applications people know, the more benefits they get. For instance, people can use Skype application to talk with their friends in different countries via video call where people can see face each other directly. Thus, several applications are able to change the types of people's relationships in which they are more sociable only just using technology.

Turning to effect given by technology, it results much more positive developments for people. They, for example, are more mobile because of the existence of technology in order to communicate to other people. Although there is a negative impact such people sometimes have individual behaviour because they are too focus on their advanced technology, people actually can use technology to make many kinds of conversations in social media via the internet, such as Facebook, Twitter, and this only can be visited by using technology.

To sum up, technology has a pivotal role to improve communication among people so they do not hard to call everyone in everywhere. Despite technology has addresses negative effect, people should have a good way to avoid it wisely. I believe that technology will always develop the quality of people's lives continually.

Writing Feedback / The process of silkworm life until it produces silk [2]

The diagrams illustrate the process of silkworm life until it produces silk and the steps for resulting silk cloth. Overall, there are four levels of life cycle of silkworm and it can also be seen that six stages are needed to produce silk cloth.

To begin with, moth obtains eggs on the leaf, then ten days later, eggs become larvae which eat mulberry leaf as their food. After that, during 4-6 weeks, larvae produce silk that covers their body. It is called by silk thread. This silk still cannot be processed until it changes to become cocoon. Next, larva change into cocoon within 3-8 days. Silk cloth will be resulted from processing the cocoon. When cocoon are not used for producing cloth, it will become moth again in 16 days.

Turning to the production of silk cloth, the first stage is selecting the cocoon. Following this, cocoon are boiled with water in particular temperature. Afterwards, cocoon are unwound into smooth yarn. The yarn which has been twisted is dyed with certain colour directly or before being dyed, the yarn is weaved first. All in all, after the yarn has colour, it is ready to be processed into silk cloth.

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Writing Feedback / Local customs and behavior are indispensable to be regarded by people who come to other countries [2]

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people consider that local customs and behavior are indispensable to be regarded by people who come to other countries. However, other people assume that it is not needed because cultural differences have to be accepted by the host country. While these views develop in society, in my opinion people must have both characters where they give tolerance to each other about different cultures and follow local traditions.

There are some reasons why people have to follow other cultures in different countries. Firstly, culture is the heritage from early inhabitants that are always done in society. They believe that it is one of the way to preserve their cultures. For instance, Jogjakarta city in Indonesia, the societies really keep the way of behave between elder and younger people. The visitors from other countries must respect toward this condition, so they can learn this as their new knowledge. In addition, customs and behavior reflect the unique culture of the country in which other people should give an honor to the experience they can take.

Besides, the host country will get many tourist when indigeneous people are friendly and open to cultural differences. Because the tourists are really interested in new customs, even they learn it until getting advanced knowledge. Welcoming other cultures is the way to create cooperation among countries, to improve the growth in economy field, and to develop the modern culture in society where they do not lose the root of culture itself.

To sum up, it is evident that people in one country need to open their eyes widely to cultural differences in many countries and the visitors must realize that local customs and behaviour are the main points which are kept in society from other countries. I suggest that people should learn generally about tradition and behaviour in other countries before they decide to visit there, so they can avoid bad character from themselves.

Writing Feedback / To become a professional one do not need to be born with a special talent, skills can be taught too [NEW]

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people feel that certain talents are brought by children since their birth, as an example sport and music ability, but the other do not accept such a particular talent, whereas it is undoubted that children can be formed becoming an expert in music field or a skilled player in sports. Whilst these views are common throughout the public society nowadays, this essay will discuss both points of view.

Basically, all children can be taught with many lessons and skills. They are easy to imitate anything they see and hear. This is the key to form them what they will become. For example, parents accustom habit to play piano or football in their golden ages so they will be used to listen the music or to learn the technique of playing soccer w ell. As a result, children have the great skill to become a pianist or a best football player.

Subsequently, children who are born with special talents also have to learn and are trained to improve their talents because talents cannot develop without practicing. All people, including talented children, need a practice for a particular skill in depth. A study shows the ability that is never rehearsed will lose eventually. Therefore, they must increase their abilities to become professional musicians or high qualified players in certain sports, even though they get those talents in early ages.

In conclusion, although some people think children get talents since they are born, I would argue they also can be taught with many abilities to become professional in a particular field that they like. Besides, any child who have certain talents must develop their abilities continually. I strongly believe that practice is one of the way to improve a proficient skill.

Writing Feedback / People are difficult to permit their children to travel or doing work - IELTS [2]

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.
Teenagers are supported to travel to other countries before entering to university for studying and after completing their high school in many countries. Travel provides many offers to be learned. Although traveling has the drawbacks, I firmly believe that the benefits of travel are greater than the disadvantages.

The reason why people sometimes think young children do not need to work or travel is that there is nothing they can achieve from its. People are difficult to permit their children to travel or doing work so they never leave their countries or town for several days to get experience. For instance, most people in US do not have passport, they then only travel once or twice in their lives. As a result, people never estimate their income to their children for making a journey and eventually children do not have many experiences or knowledge to be shared and to be taught for others.

In terms of the advantages of travel, young people who do a journey can get opportunity to learn many things, such as cultures and language. Travel gives the challenge for young age to study about different cultures, expectation from other societies, and even languages because people in other counties may have some unique cultures and different a language barrier so that teenagers can obtain the chance to learn for a year. A study shows that people who often travel around the world can keep their mind and body young. They gain happier soul and mind owing to their interesting travel. In addition, work or travel also makes people getting more knowledge and this will become another reason to meet other societies in many countries in several continents. Therefore, there is no reason not to decide a great journey for young people at this time.

In conclusion, despite travel addresses the disadvantages for people in which they have to prepare more money to do a journey, it gives more benefits when young people think travel will enrich their experiences and knowledge for their lives. They do not need worry about the risks in their journey or work place because they will learn how to solve the problem as well. Traveling or working guides them to build good character, to be a great leader, and to manage time well.

Writing Feedback / The advertisement gives influence toward the increasing number of popular consumers of the goods [3]

Guys, help me to check my essay. Thank you.

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The importance of advertisement gives influence toward the increasing number of popular consumers of the goods. However, the types of the goods are not a premier necessity for people. Although people nowadays have consumer culture and are easy to be persuaded to follow the latest trend, I strongly believe that advertising is the main key of modern business that has many benefits for society.

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Writing Feedback / The number of population in the U.S. of Oregon - gradual rise in three different counties [3]

Please check my writing task 1 for IELTS. Thank you.

The line graph compares the number of population in the U.S. state of Oregon during 1940 to 2000. Oregon had three counties and population was measured in thousands in each counties. Overall, it can be seen that there were a gradual rise of the population in three different counties of Oregon.

Columbia and Yamhill had a similar pattern. In 1940, the population of both stood at about 30 thousand. Then, they rose gradually in 1970 and again it grew rapidly in the following thirty years. 2000 saw the differences number of population between Columbia and Yamhill and it was different about 15 thousand population.

Washington had more significant increase than other two counties. Population stood at 75 thousand in 1940, which was higher than Columbia and Yamhill. Next, the population grew dramatically to between 120 and 135 thousand. This population continued to rise rapidly in 2000 to above 240 thousand. With this rate, Washington was a leading counties which had the most population in Oregon.