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'learning my whole life' - Cornell CAS essay

2 - Exposed to Cornell at a young age, the campus seemed like a place anything could happen. "You" were...

Undergraduatecvh2010 - Oct 17, 2009Haru0422KR - Oct 18, 2009
Driving in winter vs. summer

2 - Well, you have a plan, at least. I would suggest you list the similarities and differences between the two...

Essayscrtboy09 - Oct 17, 2009EF_Sean - Oct 17, 2009
[TOEFL] All students should be required to study art and music in secondary school.

13 - People like Mozart are going to learn music and art whether it is in school or not. So that...

Writing Feedbackyin - Oct 16, 2009EF_Stephen - Oct 24, 2009
"Idiot." - Too naive or too dense? Ivy league Common App main essay

5 - Thank you so much. It really means a lot >< The "i" is a verb, because to live you...

Undergraduatespicawind - Oct 16, 2009spicawind - Oct 21, 2009
The advantage and disadvantage of the mobile phones

2 - Hi, I don't think mobile phones create a lot of problem for our life and " people should...

Writing Feedbackessay0405 - Oct 16, 2009tuanlnc - Oct 17, 2009
Hypomelanosis does not sound compicated to me!; UofM Diversity Essay

14 - Hey Notoman Is there a way to contact you by email. I wanted to get in touch with you....

Undergraduateworldbound10 - Oct 16, 2009Maira - Oct 25, 2009
U.c. Application Prompt Advice (intented major)

2 - Okay, so you have the prompts. Now, write something that addresses them. I have no idea what personal qualities,...

Undergraduateasim6989 - Oct 16, 2009EF_Sean - Oct 17, 2009
Dancing / Concentration / Slow down - Help-Brown supplements

NEW - Hey, guys! These are my supplements of Brown. Welcome any comments! Grammar is important! THX! 1.Please tell us...

Undergraduatecatherineding - Oct 16, 2009 -
Can't imagine entering a profession not aimed at helping others; UM School of Nursing

8 - I also think that there are good ideas here. The best approach, I think, is to take the tow...

Undergraduateworldbound10 - Oct 16, 2009EF_Stephen - Oct 22, 2009
FSU ESSAY-- VIRUS, ARTES, MORES "BUILD HOMES FOR KATRINA VICTIM" (CRITIQUE)

3 - Thank you for the advice on this essay! I was planning on submitting it that night, but I'm glad...

Undergraduatecbaker0717 - Oct 16, 2009cbaker0717 - Oct 27, 2009
Joseph Heller's novel Catch-22 - U of M favorite book

4 - This is good! I read books but mostly mystery and I don't know how to tie that in with...

Undergraduatepapasmurf - Oct 16, 2009emjay1264jr - Oct 17, 2009
Essay on three businesses if Mr. Gates awarded me with $300,000

2 - First one is a going to be a hookah lounge called the "X-Hale, " and from there I will...

Writing FeedbackSyed - Oct 16, 2009youngeebs - Oct 16, 2009
True Spirit of Maples~ any advice is welcomed,thanks

10 - Ok, I will follow your advice ^^ thanks a loooooooot...

Undergraduatemaniano - Oct 16, 2009maniano - Oct 17, 2009
brain drain and solutions for this problem

5 - Hi thinh, I think not all people in Vietnam who has been go abroad do not go back to...

Writing Feedbackthinhtvdhtm - Oct 16, 2009essay0405 - Oct 17, 2009
Lafayette College SHORT ANSWER (drawing Chinese paintings)

6 - Ummmm...There's a mistake, I meant to type 7......

Undergraduateayida365 - Oct 16, 2009ayida365 - Oct 18, 2009
'headmistress in modern China / Power of Knowledge' - Smith College Supplement

6 - Great! Tell about what kind of psychology you want to specialize in! It will make you more distinguished and...

Undergraduatezouztingt - Oct 16, 2009EF_Kevin - Oct 30, 2009
LEGALIZATION OF SAME SEX MARRIAGE - revise my introduction, argumentative paper.

32 - I personally would simply talk about the essence of human rights; how essentially we are all equal and that...

Writing FeedbackBrianne - Oct 16, 2009Envie - Feb 9, 2010
I'm from China - common app personal statement

10 - lmy125 Yeah, I'm from PRC. Ummm...for example..."A writer who keeps diary since elementary school and strives to capture...

Undergraduatelmy125 - Oct 16, 2009ayida365 - Oct 17, 2009
common app essay- first topic- "The Palpitation"

2 - Ow. The experience you describe, while it must have been terrifying, was not in fact a matter of...

UndergraduateBasker - Oct 16, 2009EF_Sean - Oct 16, 2009
TOEFL - prefer large or small company? Large - stable jobs and fine salaries

4 - it is a contrast essay, so your structure is wrong. mention both merits and demerits , besides what overweighs...

Writing FeedbackAnly - Oct 16, 2009fuhuanluck - Oct 30, 2009
First Cut / Sister's eating disorder - U of M Essay

13 - You choose a good topic, you have some good descriptions, I just think you could work a little bit...

Undergraduateworldbound10 - Oct 16, 2009srandhawa - Oct 30, 2009
giving more chance for women can cause some problem?what are your views?

3 - Hi, I agree with worldbound10, "develop themselves" is used three times. Instead of replicating it, you can use...

Writing Feedbackthinhtvdhtm - Oct 15, 2009tuanlnc - Oct 17, 2009
I still don't know, what who I want to become

6 - I completely agree with Tsunami! For one, just take out "type of" in the first line. It makes it...

Undergraduatesnow153 - Oct 15, 2009gongan - Oct 19, 2009
"Crash" - Tranfer essay for common app

4 - i think you need to focus more on the transfering part...

Undergraduatesoapman - Oct 15, 2009anniebiotic - Oct 17, 2009
"I saw a baby die." - Common App Essay - Significant Experience

4 - Alright, thanks a lot. I'll think about how to incorporate the parents and their feelings. The essay is already...

Undergraduatemuffinman8380 - Oct 15, 2009muffinman8380 - Oct 15, 2009
Area of my choice-- Medicine

4 - Hi Viraj, While my interest in Pre-Medicine provided a foundation of my future, it was the surrounding that...

UndergraduateViraj Patel - Oct 15, 2009qyuiosilent - Oct 15, 2009
Writing about either philosophy or political parties, NEED HELP

2 - This is just my own personal idea, but it fits with what you are trying to do. The...

Undergraduatechocoholic_jo - Oct 15, 2009EF_Stephen - Oct 15, 2009
Adult returning to school... review/critique this very ROUGH draft?

7 - Start by researching your topic. Then, brainstorm to think of things you want to say about your topic that...

Undergraduateboosted_347 - Oct 15, 2009EF_Sean - Oct 17, 2009
Common App Short Answer - Playing piano at retirement homes

2 - First sentence can be "The opening chord was flawless, but" That cuts one word. Third sentence, you can...

UndergraduateWoolachee - Oct 15, 2009EF_Stephen - Oct 15, 2009
Submitting documents by post for an online application

2 - I don't see anything wrong with this format. It conveys the idea you want to convey quite clearly, which...

Graduatero_hej_ho - Oct 15, 2009EF_Sean - Oct 15, 2009
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