vangiespen
Oct 17, 2015
Undergraduate / Required 'Lifetime goals and extracirricular activities' essay [2]
Michael, what is the maximum word count for your response? The reason I ask is because you don't really need paragraphs 1 and 2 of your essay, you can simply concentrate on paragraphs 3-4. We can apply some sort of spin on the paragraphs to make it seem like the activity is part and parcel of your current and future academic and extra curricular activity in relation to your lifetime goal.
Let us put a spin on how your second year student passion for computer science turned into your career goal in life. Rather than clearly stating that this all happened when you were a sophomore, just say that your interest in computers led you to become an active member of the UIL Computer Team. There is no need to tell the reviewer that there were only 3 of you. Instead, tell us about the competitions that your group joined and the awards and prizes that you won. Tell the reviewer that you did not even notice that your extra curricular activities were still academics based because you are a person who feels that learning is best done through extra curricular activities. Those are some ideas that I hope can help you direct the paragraph towards creating an extra curricular activity for you.
Let us use only 2 paragraphs to explain your prompt response. Going for more than 2 paragraphs will make it obvious that we are trying to redirect the attention of the reviewer. In the last paragraph, don't tell the reviewer that you won't be participating in other computer science competitions. Instead, inform him that you are also competing in Math related UIL competitions because it seemed like a natural progression of your computer science extra curricular activity. Then you can retain the part about your ambition in computer science not ending there.
Hopefully, these 2 paragraphs, when developed using a particular angle, can help create the necessary requirements of the prompt. I am looking forward to reading your revised essay so that I can help you better polish it for your needs :-)
Michael, what is the maximum word count for your response? The reason I ask is because you don't really need paragraphs 1 and 2 of your essay, you can simply concentrate on paragraphs 3-4. We can apply some sort of spin on the paragraphs to make it seem like the activity is part and parcel of your current and future academic and extra curricular activity in relation to your lifetime goal.
Let us put a spin on how your second year student passion for computer science turned into your career goal in life. Rather than clearly stating that this all happened when you were a sophomore, just say that your interest in computers led you to become an active member of the UIL Computer Team. There is no need to tell the reviewer that there were only 3 of you. Instead, tell us about the competitions that your group joined and the awards and prizes that you won. Tell the reviewer that you did not even notice that your extra curricular activities were still academics based because you are a person who feels that learning is best done through extra curricular activities. Those are some ideas that I hope can help you direct the paragraph towards creating an extra curricular activity for you.
Let us use only 2 paragraphs to explain your prompt response. Going for more than 2 paragraphs will make it obvious that we are trying to redirect the attention of the reviewer. In the last paragraph, don't tell the reviewer that you won't be participating in other computer science competitions. Instead, inform him that you are also competing in Math related UIL competitions because it seemed like a natural progression of your computer science extra curricular activity. Then you can retain the part about your ambition in computer science not ending there.
Hopefully, these 2 paragraphs, when developed using a particular angle, can help create the necessary requirements of the prompt. I am looking forward to reading your revised essay so that I can help you better polish it for your needs :-)