Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

reply to Chen：

1. Pressure resistance means Resisitance to the pressure.

2. don't see which "the" you are talking about.

Origin: Therefore, it is necessary to evaluate the vulnerability of water environment in humid regions of southern China , to provide theoretical support for the water environment management

My question： It is necessary to do sth. in ~~China,to ..., Here should i Omit the,？
Here the,, I mean the punctuation symbol.
there are four kinds of expression, I do not know which is the best one.

A : Therefore, it is necessary to evaluate the vulnerability of water environment in humid regions of southern China, to provide theoretical support for the water environment management in these regions.

B :Therefore, it is necessary to evaluate the vulnerability of water environment in humid regions of southern China for theoretical support of water environment management in these regions.

C Therefore, it is necessary to evaluate the vulnerability of water environment in humid regions of southern China provding theoretical support for water environment management in these regions.

I think you could see my disturb are mainly in three places,
one is the punctuation(now I think maybe it is better to add a punctuation in such long sentence);
another is : to provide /providing / for providing , (here I am not sure which is the best one. ) ;
third :　in these regions (which I have acceptted your advice. )

sentence 3.

In order to avoid　the influences of subjective factors to improve the objectivity of evaluation results, and to make the method to be operated easily, this paper attempts to introduce the Data Envelopment Analysis (DEA) to assess the vulnerability of water environment.

Here, the first sentence is not fluent.
in order to avoid A , which leads to the results B. the first result would lead to the second,
how can I express it authentically？

Sentence 4:

Generally, the higher the pollution efficiency is, the easier to be damaged the water environment will be and the greater vulnerability it will be; on the contrary, the less efficiency it is, the smaller vulnerability it will be.

the higher the pollution efficiency is = the higher pollution efficiency it is?
the easier to be damaged the water environment will be
the greater vulnerability it will be;
the less efficiency it is, the smaller the vulnerability will be.= the smaller vulnerability it will be?

are the four sentence correct?

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

sentence 3
Therefore, it is necessary to evaluate the vulnerability of water environment in humid regions of southern China , to provide theoretical support for the water environment management

it is necessary to do sth. in ~~China, to ..., Here should i Omit the , ？

Is it better if i add '' in these regions" in the end of this sentence. ... to provide theoretical support for the water environment management in these regions. As the middle sentence 'in humid regions of southern China' make I feel it is not fluent. -_-

grea...t thanks.

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

Ａnother sentense：

This method, basing on the concept of water resource vulnerability, considersthe vulnerability of water resource as a function of sensitivity and pressure resistance under the influence of climate changes and human activities;

In this sentence, the subject is the method, so delete the middle sentence, basing ..., it becomes :　the method considers the ... as ..
1) Is the structure of this sentence correct?

2) basing ? I am a little puzzled, could I use 'based' instead?

3) or better suggestion for the expression.

Thank you very much^^

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

In order to avoid the influences of subjective factors to improve the objectivity of evaluation results, and to make the method to be operated easily, this paper attempts to introduce the Data Envelopment Analysis (DEA) to assess the vulnerability of water environment.

Here, the first sentence is not fluent.
in order to avoid A , which leads to the results B. the first result would lead to the second,
how can I express it authentically？

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

"its difficulties" - help me check this sentence

Based on above opinions, the vulnerability of water resources is defined as the vulnerable characteristics of water environment to damages from human activities and natural factors, as well as its difficulties to restore to its original state after being damaged.

Here
" its difficulties "
I want to express that the difficulties characteristics of water environment to restore to its original state after being damaged.

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

thank you(☆_☆)

Grammar, Usage / 'the easily to be damaged nature of water resources' - asking for advice for one sentence. [13]

if i say:
Kulshreshtha considers the vulnerability of water resources to be its easily to be damaged nature,
IS IT CORRECT?

Writing Feedback / Ielts Essay: Attitude towards 21 century and the world [6]

There is a widespread held perception that we human beings will be better off in the 21st century...


...living much better lives ...
comparing with (the living standards several centuries ago)


all points mentioned above

Overall, a paper good at the arguments.

Writing Feedback / IELTS:recycling is an essential measure to save the environment [3]


awareness can not be provided. but be raised or strengthened.
awareness of sth/ that
The increasing pollution to our environment has caused widespread concern in each country and people. /Nowadays, there is a widespread concern over the increasing environmental pollution on our earth. Governments from all the countries around the world have taken some actions to prevent the serious environmental pollution and to raise individuals' awareness of keeping our envioronment. Reycling is one of the most effective methods recommended by the United Nations and has been extensive accepted by most countries and people.

Writing Feedback / It is impossible for a man to stay alone - groups are part of human's life [9]

1.


2.


3.


There are some confusing places.
<TS. >
For example/instance, individuals usually enjoy staying with their families with whom they can share their happiness and sorrow no matter how large or small the size would be. Besides that, human are social animals. By establishing a community or society, people follow rules and regulations which bring others peace and wellbeing and constrain the bad manners or even crimes behaved by some individuals.

Writing Feedback / why people attend college and universities [3]


Students who attend colleges or universities can become experts in some certain fields so that it will be much easier for them to find a job after they graduate.

Undergraduate / Nursing School Admissions Essay: "to acquire skills" [6]


The dream to study at a college(/Uni.) has been one of my precious dreams ever since I began to go to school.


...I deeply know that what a college diploma means in the Philipines; It means a decent job, a stable income and a high quality of life to both my family and myself, since education is high valued in this country, just like gold to Filipinos.

need to leave sorry , with see your paper later.
you need to pay attention to the tense.

Writing Feedback / people visit museums when they travel to new places; 'curiosity about ancestors' [4]


Museum is a good place where presents us the histroy, cultures and ...

The first reason is some people like to study history.

For people who enjoy learning and studying history, museum is abbsolutely a fantasic spot. Here, what you receive are not only literal narrations but also vivid pictures or true objects, thereby giving you much deeper visual stimulation so as to make you better to understand the history.

When we come to a new place,the local museum no doubt is the best choice for us to get a clue about its culture and history.

Undergraduate / How and Why: understanding scientific findings [7]

I think your essay's beginning is excellent. By telling your dream of your childhood, readers could see how eager you are to learn this kind of knowledge and how enthusiastic you are to it ,as it has been being you dream since you are a child.


According to my experiences, I think as long as you express your eagerness for this subject sincerely, the readers eventually will be touched by your words.

Undergraduate / How and Why: understanding scientific findings [7]




That is why I am (extremely) eager to be enrolled in ...

Writing Feedback / IELTS essay: Factors Contributing to Job Satisfaction [5]

5:38
Due to the success of Industrial Revolution, the mainstream of lifestyle of human being has experienced an unprecedented transformation. Most time of each day is spending in workplaces instead of at home or in farmland. Correspondingly, most time of our lives will connect with job together. For individuals, whether a job brings individual's satisfaction or not, plays an important effect on personally happiness and enjoyment.

When individuals choose a job, the factors they often consider consist of personal interest, income and the atmosphere of workplace. Which dominates among them depends on the specific situation. For instance, a wealthy employee tends to choose his/her career from personal interest, so that he/she can fulfil personal potential maximum. In contract, a person from an impoverished family more tends to choose career from the angle of total income. The more the income is the more possibility for him/her to engage in it. The team atmosphere and work environment also play some roles in the process of seeking a job, as there is plenty of evidence that a large number of people keep changing their jobs just because they are not satisfied with work environment or the cooperation atmosphere of work group.

Besides what mentioned above, there are still other influences such as the person diploma, distance between home and workplace, traffic condition, local climate also affecting personal choice. Take personal diploma as an example, high educated individuals have more job opportunities so that they even can change the place, like going abroad to seek a high salary job. On the other hand, it is also possible that there are some people who are not willing to leave their home and prefer to work locally.

To sum up, as different people have different limited factors as well as personal position, the influences of job satisfaction should not only be restricted in the factors mentioned above. But over all, I think personal education background, interests, as well as salary occupy a majority of percentage among the factors of job satisfaction.

6:15
334

I am interested in you topic , so write one myself. I have read yours, and there seems no grammer errors, but I personal think the sencond paragraph should be extended.

Writing Feedback / Children spend too much time on computers; IELTS [7]


Children use is as a tool of listening to music or drawing pictures, instead of listening to a radio or drawing on a piece of paper. So obvious has it changed our life especially during rencent decade that we cannot neglect its existence as well as the extensive influence it brings to us.

Writing Feedback / Pie charts, comparing the sales of books [5]

how about "to sum up/ in summary/ to conclude"? which one do you think is the best one?

Writing Feedback / "Eyes On the Road" - Writing task for Emotional and physical journey [3]



I discover that no matter which path you choose, you cannot avoid one intersection after another where a choice must be made.

your essay is excellent!

Writing Feedback / To what extent do you agree or disagree?---modern & traditional building [6]

Thank you Kevin, your encouragement always gives me enormous motivation.


should it be "---accompanying the population exploration" or "----accompanying with the population exploration"? or just "with the population exploration"?

This is one point I am still a little confusion. In my E-dictionary, there is an example as follows:
The Governor was accompanied to the palace by a militrary escort.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL:I strongly agree that government should improve public transportation [3]

First of all, a perfect public transporttransportation system can help people to save many time, they do not waste time on waiting the red light or to find a parking lot.

save time or save much time.
First of all, a perfect public transport system help us save a large amount of time. Passengers do not need to spend time on waiting for the traffic light turning from green to red or finding a parking place for his vehicle.

Writing Feedback / To what extent do you agree or disagree?---modern & traditional building [6]

I am sure the phrase "population explosion" is correct. But I am not sure the another one--- "house problem" or "habitat's problem", so I check up it on the internet. The correct expression, or I should say the common expression should be "housing problem".

The current population size living on earth is unprecedented.
or The current population size living on earth are much more than ever before.

Firstly, it is decided by the present social phenomenon. Nowadays, the population of the world has increased extreme rapidly.

Take ...for example, ==For example/For instance , so, I think all of them are feasible and viable.

But there is indeed a error happening.
Take china for example, which traditional buildings are usually one or two storeys/stories/floors, how can it accommodate the present 1.3 billion population by the past house structure which only need to provide accommodation for half of the current population?

I will go on check it tommorrow. Thank you. Walaa Ahmed

Essays / Is anger ever beneficial? outline/essay [6]

Personally , I think moderate anger does good to our health.

As we are human full of feeling, it makes no sense to try to keep us calm for ever. As a matter of fact, anger ,which is a feeling expression just like happiness, is an effective approach to release our inner dissatisfaction. If reasonable anger can not be emitted in time, the serious consequence is far beyond our expectation. It is said that a certain percentage of people who fall mental illness are because of the pressed mood. ....

Besides that, the reflection of body when we get angry has some obvious features which I think are good to our health both mentally and physically. First of all, you are more concentration at that time. ....sencondly, comparing to the people who sit stably in front of TV, anger makes our body active,from head to toes, we even could say to some extent, anger stimulates our physical metabolism.

So , in my opinion, understanding our inner emotion such as happiness and anger, and futher master how to release them sensibly, is a compulsory course our contemporary people should take part in. Unfortunately, It seems there is lack of such an existence.

(Hope can help you)

Writing Feedback / The amount of money per week spend on fast foods in Britain - IELTS Task 1 essay [3]



By the way , where do your topic come from? I am also preparing for IELTS, maybe I can find the graphs in my materials.

Writing Feedback / Control over happiness - 'people gain happiness differently' (SAT) [5]


(1)If you use "both" at the beginning of the sentence, then the subject should be composed of two units. So we can use either external and internal environments or external environment and internal environment.

(2) In regard to the verb, the word "motive" is apparent a noun, the verb of which should be "motivate". Besides "motive", it also has another noun form , namely , motivation.


He was shocked by the news that Estella had got married when he became a gentleman living an extravagant life eventually.

There are two points in your sentence needing to be pointed out.
(1) tense conflict. ... to hear that ...
(2) squander V. which means spending extravagantly, here I substitute "extravagant" for it.

PS. All mentioned above is only my personal opinion. Welcome to discuss and criticise.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS-TASK1] Progress Diagram of Seawater Desalination [6]

4:40
The chart illustrates the process of seawater desalination, which are coped with by total four steps to make seawater safer for humans to drink.

It can be clearly seen that the seawater is first taken into the pre-treatment filter container through a pipe where the filter backwash is returned to the sea by another pipe; next, the left water is forced to through membrance at high pressure, where the water molecules pass to the next step while the left concentrated seawater which contains the salt and inpurities is returned to the sea once again; the third step is the post-treatment, which tranfers the water into the container where are filled with lime, chlorine and fluoride. Afterwards, the water is stored into the storage where it is prepared for integrating into the water supply system for human consumption.

Over all, there are total four steps which could be divided into three main processing procedures and one storage procedure from seawater to freshwater by the seawater desalination equipment.

5: 10

Ps: Here I am just trying to write an essay under your provided topic, It is not intended to revise yours as your essay has been rather perfect. Besides, about the word 'intake', I check it on the dictionary, it seems it is a noun. (please check once again)

(Welcome any criticism)

Writing Feedback / The role of technology in our lives today: have we become too dependent [8]


There is a variety of examples to testify/certify this viewpoint that individuals are increasingly dependent on high-techonlogy. Take the food for example, the processing time and the shelf life are shortenedand and lengthened tremendously/immensely with the help of modern technolgy such as advanced production equipments as well as more effective preservation methods; undoubtedly, the obvious merits of modern technology would absolutely lead to the extinction of traditional production way. As a result, People will reckon on the technology more seriously to preserve food in the future.

Ps: Here I use one sentence structure like : A and B are C and D; which C are used to decribe A while D are used to decribe B. As I read it before from some articles, I am not sure whether it is correct here, so, discuss.

Writing Feedback / The role of technology in our lives today: have we become too dependent [8]

[quote=singingbird]We are living in a society which is so called "technologically civilized" society.It is not an exaggereted statement nowadays that we all live on the basis of technology as what have surrounded us in rencent decades are a veriety of convenient living devices such as micro wave, washing machine,air conditioner, refrigerator which all are the products of high technology. So to a certain extent, we can safely draw the conclusion that we are more dependent

on technology than any time ever before.

Personally, I do not think we are depending on high technology in essence. So, I would change the last sentence above into the following one:

So does utilizing more modernized apparatuses mean we are more dependent on them? In other words, the more advanced the sci-technology develops the more we depends on high-technology? Personally, I do not think so; on the contary, I believe people living in the contemporary era are more independent than any time ever before.

(will continue later)

Writing Feedback / View and your opinion on traditional culture protect/destroy by tourists [4]

Thanks Azeri for your sincere suggestion.
Thank Kevin for your suggestion and encouragement. It is your encouragement that gives me a lot of couragement to go forward on the road of studying english. I am extremely frustrate recently, as I find both my oral and writing are far away to be satisfied.

But anyhow, I will go on, with all of your help and encouragement.

Undergraduate / Match with my educational goals (Seattle University) [4]

To be frank, the content is not be expressed fully. You can extend it base on your present article.

The first sentence could be extended in the following way：
Seattle University is a famous and respected university. Every year, it cultivates millions of thousands of students for the society. Not only input the students knowlege, but also encourage their creativities via its special education way. The students graduating from it could fulfil their potentials and receive approval from the society.

I want to be a knowledgeable and respected...(about yourself)

Writing Feedback / TOEFL:People enjoy change.others like their lives to stay the same [5]

If we compare those two approaches of life we find that there are a lot of reasons which lead to choose one of them. VS . Compare these two approaches to life.

Firstly, ?....Where is your 'Secondly'