Undergraduate / Unity will be the catalyst Unversity of Chicago direct learning essay! [2]

hey guys. I really didn't know how to write this one for some reason. I had some sort of a problem even though it was an easy essay prompt. I hope i did answer the question. Please help me read it and grade it! Be as hard as you like =)

PROMPT:
Question 1. How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to UChicago.

Whether it would be making a plane out of solar cells or using hydrogen ions power everything in homes, people often think and tell me that these ideas are too childish or advanced. Having a desire to display and present my engineering ideas, I believe University of Chicago will be the best place for me to implement my ideas. Having six academic departments in engineering and a large and high level faculty, I feel UChicago will be the catalyst that initiates my engineering research goals and provide me with the excellent educational foundation and experience necessary to succeed. Having multiple research laboratories and project opportunities, UChicago will enhance my love for research and discovery for new, innovative ideas while providing me with the necessary knowledge to develop my ideas. With the successful and published research projects, the question is not "Can it be done?" but "When can I do this and publish it?". The advanced technology will allow me to explore the frontiers of engineering and give me a whole new perspective of the world through the eyes of an engineer.

With the high student diversity and culture around Chicago, I can be exposed to new and meaningful cultures. With over 400 student organizations, I can engage in a lot of interesting activities that I want to do such as kayaking competitions. From Study Breaks to Dance Marathons, the customs and traditions that students do at UChicago help contribute to a sense of a close community. Being like a family, everyone can work together and help each other seek their own unique talents while working individually on projects or homework. I believe that this style of learning and community will help me flourish both personally and intellectually and allow me to discover my own potential in working with others. The unity will provide me with more comfort in expressing my ideas without any problems.

Undergraduate / The bridge between two immiscible worlds. UChicago Essay! [3]

Hey guys. This was a pretty hard essay for me. I think I kind of did bad on this rough draft. So please help me grade it! Be as hard as you like because I REALLY want to get into this school :P =)

PROMPT:
Spanish poet Antonio Machado wrote, 'Between living and dreaming there is a third thing. Guess it.' Give us your guess.

Imagine yourself dreaming (not daydreaming) of your own great invention. Now here is the catch: your dream was so good that when you wake up, you still remember it; however, all you are left with is the living world that surrounds you and your invention idea. So what is it that connects these two seemingly immiscible worlds? It is the act of creating.

Whether it be hard or easy to remember any dream, I believe that what exists between living and dreaming is the act of creating. When I dream, I feel as if I'm at a buffet: I am supplied with unlimited and different types of tools necessary to feed and satisfy my brain when I sleep. I'm am given the opportunity to come up with innovative or unique ideas to build or design things like hydrogen ion propelled Ironman suits that might change the world. As I grab each tool and put it in my mind, I construct the invention; however, when I wake up from the subconscious delicious meal , these things that I have created probably couldn't exist in the living world because of the lack of tools or the accepted scientific facts or theories that suggest that these inventions are impossible. Although I sometimes clearly remember these wacky and wild ideas, I'm given the same opportunity to create when I dreamed in the living world. As I transition from a mundane student to a potential engineer, I will gain the necessary knowledge and skills from great professors and unique research projects. I have the chance to reconstruct and recreate what I dreamed up for a few hours in the living world that might revolutionize the world using these technical skills and advanced technology that I have. Although there are limitations and obstacles that might hinder me from reforming my great invention, there is just more for me to discover and work with in. And just like a buffet, I'm given unlimited chances to go back and redesign or modify my ideas.

While dreaming, I create and come up with an idea. While living, I deal with the practical tasks and demands that I have. People often think that because of the huge disparity between these two worlds, there is nothing that can exist in between; however, this third thing is what initiates the invention from the dream, instigates it into the living world, and is the bridge that connects and supports the two immiscible and magical worlds: the act of creating.

Undergraduate / A hobo changed my poverty perspective. Brown ESsay [6]

Hey guys! It's close to the deadline and I hope you can help read this essay. It was kind of hard writing this essay because there was so much I wanted to include on this event with 2000 characters. I hope it's good. Please be as hard as you like when grading it =)

I never knew his name, but I always saw him walking with a small plastic cup and a small sign saying "Please Help Me...Please" and asking for money when I drove to church. Like every other homeless person I saw, I thought poverty was a joke and just a destiny or problem people faced. One time, I even laughed at him when I drove by.

It was that one day where he completely transformed my whole perspective on poverty. As I drove by, I saw him again, but with a policeman. Because of my snobbish attitude, I couldn't but help laugh hysterically as I saw him getting handcuffed. However, as I drove closer, I felt an intense chilly feeling as I heard him yell and fall to the ground. Looking like a suicidal attempt, I noticed him banging his head against the muddy dirt. I tried to finish the bread I had, but I couldn't help but direct my attention toward him. As I looked back at the people laughing and throwing money at him, I started to have thoughts of disgust and shame at not just my ignorant thoughts I had but at those who ridiculed him. I wanted to give him the left over money and bread I had but couldn't. When I stared at him again, I soon began to comprehend a little of the reality of poverty. It was not some joke but a scary feeling that I did not want to face. As the homeless man entered the police car, he expunged my conceited and ill-mannered mind and left me with me a completely new subservient mindset.

People often take poverty for granted. I have learned that it is easy to become absorbed in dealing with life's practical problems forget the reality that surrounds a person. It is not every day that someone can say that they can understand what poverty is like. The homeless man left a impact on my life in that there was no reason I could give to tell why I should not be thankful and appreciative for the life I lived. Although I never saw him again, I still try to take every opportunity to give back whatever I can in hope that something I give will reach him.

please help me edit it =)

Undergraduate / Between Living and Dreaming? Who knows? UChicago Essay! [9]

Hey guys. I have a few hours before I turn this hummer in and I need desperate help! This was a really crazy topic that drove me nuts. I hope it's good. I know it's long but please read it and grade it! Be as hard as you like. I'm going to fix the conversation grammar erros so don't mention those in the grammar errors =) THANKS!!

PROMPT:
Spanish poet Antonio Machado wrote, 'Between living and dreaming there is a third thing. Guess it.' Give us your guess.

"Mayday, Mayday. Our airplane has run out of gas. Please put on your breathing masks located above you" said the flying captain.

"OH MY GOD. I"M GOING TO DIE. PLEASE GOD PLEASE SAVE ME!!!" said the stranger next to me.

"Don't worry! I have this cool device I made that will help us survive." I said.

"I bought it along with me just in case something like this would happen. I made it so it could transform into a case. But when you press the button right here. It unlocks, unfolds, and becomes a mini flight deck! It has an infinite internal combustion engine with about 2000 horsepower! It even has food in the jet pack too! It is great for almost any get away or emergency situation." I explained excitedly.

"WELL GIVE ME ONE TOO. I WANT TO LIVE TOO YOU KNOW." the stranger yelled.

"I only got one, but just to make sure, let me test it. Here it goes. One. two. three. OH MY GOD. IT S..." I said.

Right about when I test my invention, my 6:45 alarm goes off. I wake up and do what I need to get ready for school. So what is it that connects these two seemingly immiscible and completely different worlds? It is the act of creating.

Although I still have my wacky dream engraved in my mind, I continue to live the mundane life of a high student: walking to class and hanging out with friends. As I eat and talk during lunch, the laughter and aroma of food detract my mindset away from the schoolwork. With my mind so engrossed in Chemistry and Math formulas during class, I no longer think about the dream I had 4 hours ago but about the grade I will get on the test and the girl I really liked. As I go home with my mind so blanked out from the formulas bouncing around, I open up my Lego box and build some random objects to relieve my stress. And as I try to build, I remember the dream invention I once had 12 hours ago with the mini jet pack I built.

Even though I am trapped within the distractions and demands of the living world, it is through the act of creating that exists in between living and dreaming. The thing that exist between the subconscious and conscious state is what initiates the invention from the dream, instigates it into the living world, and is the bridge that help carries this idea into reality. Creating fuses my two distinct thoughts to form one coherent and ground-breaking idea. Although an infinite internal combustion engine with 2000 horsepower may or cannot exist in the real world, I have the chance to break the limitations and obstacles that hinder me from developing my invention. Like engineering, I can acquire the hands on experience and necessary knowledge from research projects to bring this novelty idea to life.

People often think that because of the huge disparity between these two worlds, there is nothing that can exist in between; however, like an axel that connects two car wheels, this middle thing that is what links living and dreaming: the act of creating.

Undergraduate / 'enjoy working with others' - Why Uchicago? [4]

Hey guys. So i tried my best for this answer. Please help me grade it and read it =)! I'll return the favor. I'm turning this in soon and I need it fixed. Be as hard as you like =)

Question 1. How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to UChicago.

Whether it would be schoolwork or fun competitions, I always love and enjoy working with others because when I work collaboratively, I not only feel a sense of belonging but also a stronger sense of success. I learn more when I work together with others than by myself; as a result, what attracted me to applying for University of Chicago was its unity. Through UChicago's tight and welcoming community, I get the feeling of "I am here at a second home". Having over 400 student organizations and surrounded by a beautiful city, this large but close community will allow me to study efficiently while having fun at the same time. From music groups to intense debate teams, I feel that I can expand my love for working with others while exposing myself to new cultures. Being like a family, everyone can work with and help each other seek their own unique talents while working individually on unique engineering projects. I believe that this style of community would help me flourish both personally and intellectually and allow me to increase and improve my communicational and leadership skills that will benefit me greatly in my future jobs.

Scholarship / An Engineering being born (science, technology, engineering, or mathematics) [4]

Hey guys! i'm turning this thing in in about 30 minutes! I really need some quick feed back! Be as hard as you like and thank you!!

PROMPT:A key element of this application is an essay of approximately 500 words describing your interests and experience as they relate to science, technology, engineering, or mathematics.

2012 NSHSS Foundation $1,000 STEM Scholarship Essay

As I gaze into the Lego play box, I am immersed with inanimate objects waiting to be morphed into life. Although there was a guide to aid me in my creations, I irreverently tossed it to the side of the room. I soon became unable to suppress my imagination-filled mind that waited eagerly to enter the Lego box. As I grabbed the first block, I felt surges of excitement pulsing through my hands.

Whether it'd be building Lego structures or bottled rockets, I have always been interested in assembling models and objects. Ever since I was a kid, gazing at colossal skyscrapers or outrageously styled cubic buildings had greatly amazed me. I kept pondering how people could construct such eye-catching and complex creations. As I entered high school, my interests further expanded when I took Physics and Chemistry classes that answered my never ending questions about these buildings. Participating in the Egg-O-Naut (bottled rocket) event in Science Olympiad and learning about structural mechanics and stress gradually built up my erupting curiosity and interests in engineering.

My experiences and interests in building have also affected the way I perceive the world. I view everything as a building block that will contribute to something greater in the future. From something as simple as a wooden table to something as complex as a skyscraper, everything has a purpose in transforming the innovative world. While one might see a Lego piece as just a child's toy, I see it as a potential piece of novelty that will give rise to new ideas that might revolutionize advanced technology. To that end, while any given object or idea includes a foundation, it itself can serve as a foundation for new knowledge and ground breaking inventions that will help pave the road for the future.

This scholarship will be the catalyst that will initiate my engineering goals and the provider that will offer me the excellent educational foundation and experience necessary to succeed. Furthermore, the scholarship will give me extra opportunities to implement my innovative and unique ideas in designing ground-breaking mechanical engines that would help revolutionize the dynamic world. From neutrino powered jets to water propelled vehicles, I can open new doors to new ideas or possibilities for change. I want to take my love for building and invest it in studying and researching engineering in order to become a professional mechanical engineer for Boeing. By gaining the necessary knowledge and skills with the help of this scholarship, I can help create these unique engines or designs that will greatly contribute to the people around me.

Undergraduate / A passion for research and a change for the world (Michigan research community) [2]

Hi guys! This is my essay for why I want to enter the MRC (michigan research community). Its due in about an hour and I need some opinions! You can be as hard as you like as long as you back it up (:

If you read and grade it, I will read yours too =)

Based on this description of the program, please tell us why you would be a good candidate for membership in the MRC next year.

Although my fellow classmates find it very annoying, I have discovered that my habit for asking questions has been one of the key characteristics that has made me diverse from others. Whether it be questions about engineering such as "Is it possible to make a water combustion engine or a neutrinos powered engine?" or questions about theory of knowledge such as "Does knowledge require some form of rational basis?", I've realized that this habit has not only aided in and enhanced my erupting passion for research but has also opened doors and opportunities for new discoveries and innovative ideas. Having been participated in plant biology research as well as being a Brahma Tech research intern, I have obtained personal research experience and developed strong personal relationships with others that have allowed me not only to develop emotionally but also academically; as a result, I believe that I am a qualified candidate for the Michigan Research Community.

As an IB senior taking Biology HL, I have done extensive research concerning plant life and morphology. In addition, I have also participated in Brahma Tech research concerning technology and its affect on the human population. Participating in numerous labs and one year-long research project with a 4,000 word essay regarding Pea plants and egg white, I have not only gained special experience in the researching field but also developed individual skills that have helped to work and study better. Furthermore, besides gaining deep insight and exploring the frontiers of biology, I have also developed personal relationship with my research mentor as well as other students involved in the same research projects as I have.

However, something I noticed through my biology research was that I was not satisfied. Despite the numerous questions and knowledge I've accumulated, I desired to go out of thinking box and onto more complex research that would affect the outside world. And both of these desires can be fulfilled through the Michigan Research Community because through the MRC, I can be exposed to not only the interdisciplinary nature of research but also to new perspectives through the eyes of an engineer, continuing to ask and formulate new questions as I expose myself to the new stimulating academic field. I can go beyond the high school laboratories and enter a community that I can engage with people who have similar or different passions. Furthermore, with the MRC, it is not longer the question of "So what is the research question professor and when is it due?" but "Is the lab open daily and can I research multiple topics?" With my "asking question habit" and past research experience, I believe that I am a qualified candidate for the Michigan Research Community because I can use this opportunity at the MRC to carry out and successfully fulfill my thirst for research and explore the frontiers of multiple research fields such as engineering and biology.