Writing Feedback / It is sometimes argued that public libraries are not needed to be conserved [3]

public libraries are necessary

It is sometimes argued that public libraries is not needed to be conserved as much more money is spent to do it and the presence of computer technology can change the way of reading. While I agree that computer technology helps readers in many ways, I firmly believe that maintaining libraries is worthwhile.

Public libraries must kept because there are many benefits when paying attention to it in good maintenance. For example, the national library of Great Britain, there are many collection of book over time which is a home for a thousand ancient book and newest printed book. It is a good place to researchers and student across the world. Moreover, public libraries can be a place of learning of young generations. They can look and observe sequence of knowledge development from real book. Also, written book is priceless item and they convey knowledge for the next generation. Therefore, there is no doubt that public libraries must be maintained in good condition although it needs a lot of money.

However, advance technology such smartphones and computers brings many benefits for people to read book as it changes reading activity become much more convenient. Other reason is not everyone has enough time to go to public libraries. Free-ebook.net, for example, is useful website. It can be accessed by mobile phone or computers which allows users to devise nearly all types of book. In addition, readers can read every time and everywhere that they want. Hence, it can be seen from the example that computer technology change the way people read.

To sum up, I believe that maintaining public libraries are necessary even though computer technology gives an easy way in reading books.

Writing Feedback / The number of elderly people in Japan was stable between the years of 1960 and 1980. [2]

The line graph illustrates the proportion of elderly people in three different countries, USA, Sweden, and Japan. Overall, it can be seen that the portion of elderly citizens in all countries rises between 1940 and 2040.

To begin, from 1940 to 1980, the percentage of aged people in USA and Sweden stood at 9% and 6% respectively in 1960, and then increased slightly to 10% in Japan and 8% in Sweden in 1960. Afterwards, the population experienced gradual increase to 15% in the next year. Conversely, population of aged people in Japan witnessed slow decline. It was stood at 5% in 1940 and then decreased minimally to 3% in 1960. Next, the portion of elderly people in Japan was stable between 1960 and 1980.

Subsequently, in the following three decades, all the countries saw an upward trend and a peak. The population of aged people in japan reached a high of 27% in 2020 and it was the higher level than other countries which reached a peak at 25% in Sweden and 23% in USA.

• 
  WT1_proportion_elder.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / Network openings time, range of services and passengers number in some underground railway systems [2]

The table compares underground railways systems in six different cities including when network is opened, length of services, and passenger number. At first glance, it is evident that the oldest underground networks such in London, Paris, and Tokyo was larger and had a higher number of passengers than others such in Washington DC, Kyoto and Los Angeles.

Turning first to the Oldest network, the first largest system was in London. It was opened in 1863, with 394 kilometers of route and 775 million passengers per year. The second largest networks, in Paris, is only roughly a half the size of London underground and served 1191 passengers. The Tokyo systems was the highest passenger number, with 1927 passengers.

In contrast to this, the remaining 3 countries, Washington DC was the most extensive than the other networks in route, with 126 kilometers. That network served 144 million passengers per year. Next, the other networks were Kyoto and Los Angeles. They had a lower passenger than Washington DC with 45 million and 50 million respectively and had about a fifth of the route size of Washington DC.

• 
  WT1_railways.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / WIND TURBINES - how can be constructed and then activated by the wind if located in a proper place [8]

The diagrams illustrate how wind turbine can be constructed which can be activated by wind and show where it can be placed in different location. Overall, although wind turbines are built in 3 different locations, All of them can be operated well.

The component of wind turbines consists of blades-fiberglass or wood for windmill. Also, there is any wind sensor to adjust speed and direction. Then, generator is located below of wind sensor which has power to around 1.5 megawatts. These elements are supported by steel tower. The work of wind turbines is controlled by a computer. It will receive information from sensor that adjusts direction and angle of blades of wind turbines.

The wind turbines can be placed in land above sea level. It is an optimum location because turbines get maximum wind strength. Landscape should not spoil as well. Domestic turbine will generate power up to 100 kilowatts.

Writing Feedback / Each student has their own study style. Which one is the most effective? [NEW]

Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in groups, while others believe that it is better for them to study alone.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

Each student has their own study style. One group of people believe that study in groups is more powerful, another group think that study alone is more effective to them. Whilst I believe that study alone is good to achieve satisfactory result, I firmly believe that study in group brings a greater result.

Some benefits can be gained from study alone for students such as improving focus and minimizing distraction as students only learn by themselves without interference from others. For example, sometimes students may find difficulties in one lesson. Then, they can stay long time and focus on it until they understand and find a solution. As a results, studying alone allows students to completely concentrate and minimize disruptions that can keep from retaining material. Also, it helps to avoid temptation when students work alone and minimal interruptions. It can be seen from example that study alone only just give little benefit.

However, study together brings many advantages for student such as expanding access to information because they have some study partner to share knowledge. Also, they can ask each other about a particular topic that they do not understand. For instance, in study together, students tend to share their knowledge or notes to others, so that students can understand and have detailed information regarding special topic. Also, they will help each other seeking problem solutions if one of them obtain a trouble. As a results, students spend time to study more effective in a relatively short time. It proves that study in group very useful for students itself.

In addition, study in groups boost motivation or spirit of students as they have friend to discuss a material or particular detail. For example, if you study alone, sometimes it is boring and students tend to fall asleep. Then, they do not continue to study. Studying together contains some person, so that students will tend to have big motivation and spirit to study. As a consequence, students have a passion to learn and review material with their partner, so that they can truly comprehend about lesson. It can be seen that study in group is good for the student.

The aforementioned evidence shows that even though studying alone is good for students but study in groups is better way for them. Hence, students must choose study in group in study style if they want to get study result maximally.

Writing Feedback / There are ten series of action in the process of chocolate production [3]

The diagram presents the process of making chocolate. It can be seen that there are ten series of action in the process, beginning with the pods on cacao trees and ending in the production of chocolate.

First, the chocolate comes from cacao tree, which is grown in three countries. They are south America, Africa, and Indonesia. After the cacao is ripe and red, the pods are harvested and the white cocoa beans are removed. Afterwards, next process is beans fermentation, which is followed by spreading the beans in sun so they can dry under the sun. Subsequently, the beans are put in large sacks, and then transported by train or truck to the factory. Beans are roasted at a temperature of 350 degrees. Following that, beans are crushed and they are separated from their outer shell. Finally, in the final stage, the inner part is pressed and the chocolate is produced.

• 
  making_chocolate.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS - WRITING TASK 1 - estimated world illiteracy rates, separated by area and sex [2]

The bar chart illustrates estimated world literacy rates which is separated by region and by gender in 2000. At first glance it is evident that, female illiteracy was the higher than male illiteracy in all of areas, but the highest rate is in South Asia, either woman or man.

To begin, developed countries was the lowest rate in illiteracy, either male or female. It stood at around 1%. Also, the other areas such as Latin America/Caribbean had slight rates roughly 10% and 20%.

Turning to other three countries, Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States, and South Asia witnessed a significant difference between women and man, with rates 30% in woman and 50% in man. In Sub-Saharan Africa, female illiterates were higher than male, with a gap approximately 18%. Next, Arab states was also had a dramatic number among two gender with 29% and 52% respectively. The highest rate of illiteracy was in South Asia, approximately 35% in women and 55% in man.

• 
  barchart.illiteracy_.gif
  

Writing Feedback / There are many factors for the crime rate increase among underaged people [2]

The crime rate among teenagers has increased in many countries.
Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions.

The number of teens who involve in criminal case has risen around the world. There are many reasons for this increase. The most significant excuse are divorce of parents and poverty. This problem can be overcome by linkage of parents, government and teenager itself.

Children from divorce parents are susceptible to get into crime or other anti-social activities as they lack affection from family and parental supervision. Some of children from incomplete family have problem in psychological and emotion in their life. According to research from scientific American, showed that only a relatively small percentage of children experience serious problems in the wake of divorce or, later, as adults. As a results, children join in bad community and they vent their sadness with criminal acts outside of the home. Family, especially parents, should intervene to their children because family condition is the most important impact and the key word for the people become who they are in the future. Parents should repair the communication relationship between husband and wife to protect their children from harmful effects of divorce.

The other reasons of high crime rate among teenagers is poverty which causes they can accomplish their school as other juvenile, so that they have tendencies to developing criminal. A researcher, Jens Ludwig and his team observe about urban poverty and juvenile crime in America. The experiment showed that particular concern of crime is the possibility that the volume of crime in America may be related in part to the spatial concentration of low-income families in high poverty. Education is very important part in people's life because it will develop good character, so that teenagers must have best education. As a consequence, they will avoid to get in law and take positive activity. This problem needs a contribution from government, such as providing scholarship.

The aforementioned evidence shows that some possible reasons of increasing crime rate in many countries is caused by divorce parents and poverty. Hence, Government and parent are the important party in this problem to make a good future generation. Parents must create health family ambiance in a home and must ensure what activities child do outside, either in school or hanging out. Also, government should pay more attention to the poor with access to cheap or free education.

Writing Feedback / There is no community spirit in high rise apartment blocks? Task 2 [2]

People live in a building and around society. One group of people think that living in high-rise flats block is an unhappy experience because there is no community spirit, but the other groups believe that it has something better in the way of feeling of society than living in houses. Whilst I believe that living in flats is a lonely experience, I firmly believe that it has the sense of social group and has great experience.

Social interaction is a substantial factor in psychological state of someone that determines what people feel such as lonely or happy. This is a problem for people who live in flats as usually they rarely do not know and meet their neighbor, so that there is no interaction in apartment. For example, most of people who live in flats are always spend their time in work place from morning to afternoon. Usually they go back in the night to sleep, so that it causes the lack of interaction among people in apartment. There is no wonder that many people in flats experience the lonely and dull life.

However, there are any rooms in apartment that can encourage people to make interaction, so they have good sense of society spirit, such as cafeteria in rooftop and public space in each floor. They can meet their relative, neighbor, or colleague in that place. For instance, remaining time to enjoy spare time in a day with neighbor in cafeteria is one of activity that some people do in flats. As a result, they have good relationship with other people in flat. As it can be seen from example, happy life can be obtained in flats.

In addition, the room arrangement of flats usually brings people in lobby and corridor that stimulate them to communicate with other residents. For instance, an apartment in Yogyakarta, Mataram city is one of flats that use one-corridor system in space planning apartment. As a consequent, residents frequently communicate with other occupants in that public space. There is no doubt that better sense of society can be reached with living in flats.

The aforementioned evidence shows that although living in apartment can cause a lonely life, but it enhances sense of community. Hence, do not worried to stay in flats because it can also increase sense of social group.

Writing Feedback / IELTS 1 - Money Spent on Books - France and Austria spent the most [2]

The line graph shows the change in the amount of money spent on books in some countries from 1995 to 2005 and is measured in millions of US dollars. Overall, it can be seen that, France and Austria show the upward trend along period, but Germany and Italy experience a fluctuation over 11 years.

To begin, France and Austria spent most money on books. They began at a fairly similar level during 3 years. Then, in France, 1999 saw a gradual increase to around 10, but Austria witnessed a levelling off at 40 in that year until 2001. Afterwards, Money spent on book in France rise slightly for the remainder of the period, while Austria increase dramatically from 2001 to 2005.

Turning to other countries, released funds on books in Germany saw small growth during the period 1995 to 1999, but then fell steadily over the next 5 years. Next, there was a sudden rise from 2003 to 2005. Another country, Italy witnessed a slow increase during 2 years, but then declined slowly approximately 50 between 1997 and 1999. Finally, there was increased steadily to around 65 at the end of period.

• 
  Money_spent_on_books.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / Doctors and inventors should collaborate in many aspects to bring community better life and future [4]

Inventors are not as important to society as doctors. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Society need great people to bring them to the better life. Some people think that inventors have big role in community, but some others believe that doctors have bigger role in community. I think that both of them have same role, doctors are as substantial as inventors that are interconnected.

An invention is needed to bring community in forward life, so that their life can change into better life. For example, the invention of cutting-edge household appliances, such as Samsung smart home, it makes the life of society is easier than before because the tools like television and air conditioning can be controlled just in one device or wearable technology such as watches. As a results, people's life in a home become more convenient and saving their time. Thus, they can do other activity. There is no wonder that inventors are very significant in a large of group of people.

In addition, health aspects also have a huge role in community that involves doctors as they keep the health of society. For instance, the number of disease in some areas tend to increase every year, and an infected person is also increasing. Sometimes it usually spreads to their neighbor that raise people who are infected the disease. The presence of doctors in community becomes very important. The more many doctors do practice in society, the more people have easy access to the health. Hence, it can be seen from example that doctors have a big impact in community.

The aforementioned evidence shows that inventors are as important as doctors in society. Therefore, it can be better if doctors and inventors collaborate to bring community in better life and future in many aspects such as health and convenient life.

Writing Feedback / IELTS - 20 minutes task - the sale of hybrid vehicles in global [2]

The bar chart shows information of the sale of hybrid vehicles around the world from 2006 to 2009, and it is measured by in the number of sales. Overall, it can be seen that US is the highest sales country over 3 over the first three years while in the last period japan dominated the global sales.

To begin, the number of transport sales stood at 250,000 in US in 2006, which was followed by that in japan and other in same number at around 50,000. Then, US saw a peak at 350,000 in 2007, but the sales of other countries increased minimally to around 10.000. Afterwards, 20008 saw a slight rise in japan and other, roughly 20.000 in each country. In opposite, there was a minimal decrease in US of approximately 40.000. At the end of the period, the sales in US also declined slightly to 290.000, but the other country and japan witnessed a sudden increase. Japan reached a peak at 270,000 in 2009 and the other also experienced minimal increase to around 15,000.

• 
  The_sale_of_hybrid_v.jpg