Writing Feedback / IELTS ; Pay attention to preserve culture and environment [8]

responsible tourists have paid attention to preserve about culture and environment. some people believe its impossible to pay attention . to what extend do you agree or dis agree.

With a tremendous growth of tourist industry around the world,regional authorities have faced with the serious issue about preservation of local's culture and environment. Although there are certain people who state the impossibility of paying proper attention toward this problems by tourists, it is agreed that they must do it forthwith.This will be proven by looking at the main attractive tourist' factors such as natural beauties and traditional goods of torist's destinations.

To begin with, it is reasonable to expect from tourists protect environment because they visit primarely other countries in order to observe different natures. If a person did not control own action in the foreigh environment, other tourists would more unlikely to experience these beauties. For example, in Russia, when people travel around the biggest world's lake they try to not use off-roaders, so next generation will be able to see the important natural phenomenon. Thus, tourists' duty in the preserving local's environment can be seen as an paramaunt objective.

In addition to the above, traditionally, people go abroad to exchange goods which are produced only locally. These products have a long correllated history with local's cultures,so they unconsciously support these tradition's productions. To illustrate this, take chinese's tea, for example. Tourists who visit China and buy well-known tea products maintain financially chinese's production and as a corollary the chinese's tea culture. This example shows that if one's society consumes international products they must protect the foreigh's cultures as well.

As a way of conclusion, tourism industry is being pit in the hot debate about its influence on local's environment and traditions. Nevertheless, preseving them is partly a responsibility of tourists and I would argue that it will be more important in the future. Therefore, I believe that tourist are able to pay attention in terms of evaluate properly their action toward oversee's environment and support monetarily foreigh cultures.

Writing Feedback / Ielts. Problems and solution of ageing populations. [5]

Hi everyone,i would appreciate if you check this essay.

Task: In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

Nowadays, people have lived longer than ever before. Although this tendency is a definitely positive phenomenon, it brings certain devastating outcomes to the population and society as a whole. To tackle these issues, people must enhance the labour market to elders, and find extra places for living in the future.

To begin with, as an average life is extended, the proportion between work capable people and retired will be ever-increased in the future. As a result, taxpayers will have to pay more in order to support seniors. As an illustration of this is Japan. In this country, there been noticed a significant disproportion in the population, so the Japanese government inclines to the seniours-friendly society and increases the regular tax. A solution can be seen through providing additional workplaces to old people to facilitate the seniours' independence out of the budget.

Apart from the pension issue, there will be a crucial problem with the living space. With the progression of population's growth, people need more places to live. Take China and India, for example. It is a well-known fact that the new generation of both these countries will have encountered the deficit of living areas. This issue can be addressed through the settlement of planets nearby such as the planet Mars. The future accommodation of other planets is the imperative objective for the next generation, yet we are fortunate today to witness the endeavour of this movement.

Whilst the humankind continues to grow, the challenges with financially support of the sensitive age group and providing them living spaces come along as well. Therefore, the contemporary society must find a way to give them work and observe closer planets as the future place to live. Thus, it is hoped that these suggestions will be beneficial in the long-run.

Thank you

Writing Feedback / IELTS Human's dependence in the modern world [5]

Some people think that in the modern world we have become more dependent on each other, while others think that people are now more independent.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In a world of technological progress, real connections between people are considered as a great value. While there is an opinion that modern humankind has discontinued to keep in touch with each other, many disagree with it and state that an ordinary men depended on surrounded people more then ever before. This essay will analyze both views before a reasonable conclusion is drown.

To begin with, the major argument why people believe in the modern dependence of humankind is an ever-increasing rate of globalization. As long as costumers opt for international items, they have been forced to depend on alternative countries' supplies. A perfect example of this would be the cinema industry, where people around the globe have anticipated the Hollywood productions.

In addition, the emerging of the Internet and allied connection devices has enabled people in one country work on international corporations in another. These devices have certainly put mankind in dependent position in term of the global employment. Hence, the dependence of people on each other can be clearly seen, as they expedite the level of globalization between cultures through contemporary devices.

In contrast, the improving of the technology has allowed people to rely on a machine instead of a human. When a modern person searches information, he would likely to employ a global search engine rather then ask a brilliant scientist. This example illustrates the current level of independence in regards to knowledge. Thus, it can be concluded that the technology brings tremendous changes in human reliability on each other.

After looking at the both sides of the issue, I would state that the modern world has alerted the way of people's live, causing a serious shift in their communication. Therefore, the global populace can be seen as less depended than they used to be. It is hoped that the global village will change this tendency in the near future for the long-run benefits.

Writing Feedback / IELTS; government´control on water´using. [11]

Some people think they have right to use as much fresh water as they want，others，otherwise believes governments should strictly control the use of fresh water as it is limited resource. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In a world where customers always rights,the controlling own needs can be necessary. One of the most important necessities for a human is the water supply. Although some argue in favour of unlimited using, others consider this resource should be regulated by the authority. As this discussion is an imperative issue for humanity, I will analyze both sides before providing a reasonable conclusion.

To begin with, there appears to be an argument over the people' notion that it is their right to spent as much water as they wish. When ordinary people pay for this service, they deserve to measure their limit on their own. It would be unfair to control people' action toward water' using by the government, as they have legal rights to use it. Hence, the position of people who support water supply without restriction is understandable.

On the other hand, it is a well-known fact that many people around the world are struggling because of the deficiency of water. In this case, the government organisations which jurisdiction is the providing of water resources have to regulate the frequency of water'using. Through the implementation of such policy a local society will certainly benefited. As an illustration of this strategy is African cultures. In these regions,the majority of population suffered without clean water,however, since the certain authorities have endeavored to seriously control this resource, a regional populace experiences an improvement in comparative terms. Thus, the imperative objective of the government in regard to regulating water resources can be seen.

To sum up, after analyzing both views, it is agreed that the state must manage such crucial resource, as long as it is shortage for population. Therefore, it is hoped that people who can afford themselves to get extra water supply will be put in the same position as destitute ones in terms of water' using.

Writing Feedback / IELTS>criminal trials in law court are telecasted on Television for public [5]

In some countries, criminal trials in law court are telecasted on Television for public. Do you think advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

In a world of the media,there is increasing variations of television shows. Some people believe that the broadcasting from court might pose a negative effect on the audience. However, in my opinion, modern society has to understand the principles how legal system works.

To begin with, one of the argument against might be that the offenders have become a sort of celebrities in eyes of youth. While children have access to the internet and allied resources, they may able to adopt unappropriated behavior from the heroes in the television shows about the court's trials. For instance, there is a widely popular video in Youtube, where a girl demonstrates such attitude toward a judge. However, it educates them as well about dire consequences which follow after this type of behavior. Hence, the effectiveness of broadcasting from a court can be necessary.

Apart from the promotion of the correct way to conduct, an ordinary people can also comprehend an entire prosecution process by watching a trial in television, and therefore be aware of his legal rights. Some people do not have knowledge how to behave with the police, and so through learning the basic of law, they would be benefited. An example of this is my youngest brother, He likes to watch real telecasting from a court as it explains the reasons behind each sentence. As a result, he is now able to protect himself in case of a criminal bias. Thus, the positive aspect can be viewed in regard to broadcasting from a court.

To sum up, although there appears to be an argument against television broadcasting of trials on the basis of promotion wrong types of behaviors,I firmly believe that this phenomenon brings tremendous benefits in terms of education purposes.Therefore, It is hoped that a similar strategy will be put into action in other countries as well.

Please evaluate this attempt.
Thank you in advance

Undergraduate / I had participated in a variety of original Russian art fields; Statement of intent [2]

Hi fellows

Please, evaluate my first part of essay as it needs proofreading and correction.

My name is Anton Antonov from Moscow, Russia. 26 years old. From childhood to teenage I have had frequent encounters with all sorts of visual arts. As I had attended local art school for 5 years, I had participated in a variety of original Russian art fields such as wooden and fabric painting, as well as develop traditional skills in drawing, painting , and sculpture. Attending a last pre-professional architecture school in Russia, I had cultivated an appreciation of architecture as a form of art . Consequently by asking the questions and looking for correct information I dealt with my graduation project for a gigantic shopping mall. During my education in Moscow College of Architecture I had been preoccupied with the study of Digital Medias and as a result found my first employee right at the time of graduation. I had gained the foundation necessary to place me into the architecture field. Nevertheless, as my previous academic provider has an exclusive direct pathway into the top of Architecture University in my country I was enrolled to Moscow Architecture Institute. Keeping aside the fact that I was working as an architect technician I could manage to follow aggressive curriculum for one year. However, after a year I had to choose between theory and practice. Unfortunately I opted for the latter as I had thought that my knowledge and skills enough to pursue my true passion in architecture domain. Now I do realize that certain aspects remain elusive and I seem not to have much formal education background about the role and place of architect in society.

In view of this, it is my greatest pursuit to further my level of knowledge, the elegant design of structures,and learn design principles which certainly affect global architecture community.

To pose myself intellectually in relation to various physical and cultural contexts I have faced many opportunities to improve my knowledge independently.
Past 10 years I have visited many famous places with diversity of architecture styles, from modern Asian architecture (Hong-Kong and Singapore) to ancient Europe( Egypt, Spain, Germany),even in the Oceanic region (New Zealand, Australia, Indonesia) where I prepared my English communication skills and explore local aboriginal art and architecture landmarks. However the architecture carrier requires a wide range of expertise which I am not able to gain on my own. What appeals to me about the Architecture course offered at Dalhousie University is the range of flexibility, with profession practice and theory, to suit my desire for rapid saturation of alternative education approach.

thank you

Undergraduate / My education was not just about getting degree; Statement of intent [3]

Please evaluate last correction of my statement.
I do not have words limit so I decided to write for two A4 pages.

Thank you

When you are surrounded by splendid environment it positively contributes into your daily life as well. Nevertheless, I have experienced the opposite side of this by living in Russia. Now my continuing lifelong goal is to change regional standard of living through develop better communication between city environment and local public, yet I know that this is impossible without the exploration of alternative construction approaches at a variety of scales and consider them in relation to climate, urban situation, and the natural environment. In view of this, it is my dream to pursue and further my level of studies on the elegant design of structure and be educated on design principles at Dalhousie University as my prior education background and experience have made me an exceptional candidate for the Bachelor of Environment Design in the Faculty of Architecture and Planning.

From my childhood to my teenage years I had encountered with all sorts of visual arts. I attended a local art school for 5 years, and participated in a variety of original Russian art fields such as wooden and fabric painting, as well as developed traditional skills in drawing, painting , and sculpture. Consequently by attending a pre-professional Architecture College in Russia and studying at Moscow Architecture Institute I had cultivated an appreciation for architecture as a form of art and found my further carrier.

My education was not just about getting degree. In Moscow College of Architecture I preoccupied myself with the study of Digital Medias which landed me with perfect tools for the presentation of my creative ideas. At the same time by exploring associated technical fields of architect's job I dealt with my graduation projects which required a wider range of expertise. As my post secondary academic provider has an exclusive pathway into the top of Architecture University in my country I was enrolled to Moscow Architecture Institute without exams. However, working as an architect technician I could not manage to follow the aggressive curriculum more than one year and finally had to choose between theory and practice. Unfortunately, I opted for the latter as I had thought that my knowledge and skills enough to pursue my true passion in architecture domain. Now I do realize that certain aspects remain elusive and I seem not to have much formal education background about the role and place of architect in society.

Nonetheless, I gained the foundation necessary to place me directly into the architecture field. Working at a large architecture bureau, I realized that Russian studious often tended to work in conjunction with bigger development companies for developing their projects in order to get more money and do not care about building defined performance standards, do not consider issues of sustainability with regard to energy balance and conservation of nature by using components materials. Moreover, there exist a lack of common criteria in the profession of architect except the price, which lead clearly to urban mistakes. However, all of these issues traditionally had been accomplished in the past with apply alternative knowledge and experience by inviting foreign architects to develop correct urban environment in Russia. Therefore, I gain to develop the network of connections with the larger international architecture and actually want to continue my education on a larger scale.

To pose myself intellectually in relation to various physical and cultural contexts I have faced many opportunities to improve my knowledge independently and increase my attention span.. Past 10 years I have visited many famous places with diversity of architecture styles, from modern Asian architecture (Hong-Kong and Singapore) to ancient Europe( Egypt, Spain, Germany),even in the Oceanic region (New Zealand, Australia, Indonesia) where I prepared my English communication skills and explore local aboriginal art and architecture landmarks which reflects a particularly wide diversity of cultural backgrounds. However, I could not explore one of the most important goals that I wanted to gain and finally implement them in my country., creative thinking , which is also an important area that architects must address in their profession. Next step was to find a place where I would be educated by such essential skills.

Canada was a choice of similarity to my country as they both share almost similar climate conditions, and so construction of architecture forms requires following resemble construction norms and usage of materials. In addition a famous in Russia author of Two Hulls House( Brian MacKay-Lyons) seems to be one of the reason why I choose Canadian architecture schools. What appeals to me about the Architecture course offered at Dalhousie University is the range of flexibility, with profession practice and theory to suit my interests in real projects and first-hand technological experience which will bring rapid benefits and enrich my knowledge and skills. I recognize that my acceptance to this program is an investment for the future, and I believe that my future goals and the desire to reach them make me a valuable investment for Dalhousie university .My professional experience, broad academic training, background and style would be of benefit to the School of Architecture, as would my desire to personally progress and help my country and citizens do the same. I am confident that my acceptance into the Architecture program at Dalhousie University will prove to be a mutually beneficial decision and would certainly affect global architecture community in the future as this interaction between architecture schools is able to approach the quality and reach better results for contemporary architecture.