Writing Feedback / TED Talks: 10 ways to have a better conversation [4]

TED Talks: 10 ways to have a better conversation
By Celeste Headlee

In this world, every conversation has potential to be developed into argument. Research that involved 10,000 people in United States of America showed that we are not listening each other while we are making conversation. On the other hand, conversation requires balance between listening and talking. Now, some people lose such balance because of cutting-edge technology. Most teenagers seldom to talk face to face today. They prefer texting rather than making conversation. Therefore, they get difficulty when they do the class project.

Pay attention is the most important way when we talk or listen something. Furthermore, there are several ways to make better conversation. First, we do not allow to multitask. Second, we should go with the flow. Next, don't compare with your experience. Your acquaintance's experience is totally different with yours. Finally, it is about listen. Without listening, the good conversation will not happened.

Writing Feedback / Time : Rainbow cake mountains show stunning slices of colour [2]

Time : Rainbow cake mountains show stunning slices of colour
By Emily Benson

Breaktaking parts of colour are seen in rainbow mountains

There is an alien-like phenomena in China's Zhangye Danxia Landform Geological Park. Such phenomena, which is located in Gansu Province, is colourful mountain that consists of many parts of colour. Since of such a fact, society often call it as rainbow mountains.

Such a view occurred since water and oxygen contacting with iron, minerals, and others element that writhe from sediment. In the past, sediment transformed into rock. Then, tectonic forces made rock moved and formed unique structure as we saw today. Such forces are same as forces that used to make Himalayas Structure. With erosion from water and wind, the relief of rock had been changed as we see today.

reference : time.com

Writing Feedback / The percentage of Scotland's demographic progression from 1940 to 2020 is presented in the graph [3]

The figure shows demographic trend in Scotland. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.
The percentage of Scotland's demographic progression from 1940 to 2020 is presented in the line graph. Overall, the birth rate is projected to decline gradually over time. While the population growth rate is estimated to hit a lowest point in around 2005, there is predicted to increase gradually in the end of period.

In 1940, the proportion of birth rate stood at 2.5 per cent. Afterwards, there was a gradual decrease to 2.0 per cent in half decade later. Then, it began to increase during the period 1945 to 1950. Finally, such a value decreased continuously over years, and it envisaged to remain stable for the following years.

Both of population growth rate and death rate were below 2.0 per cent in the beginning years, at 1.5 per cent and virtually 1.0 per cent respectively. The population growth reached a high of 1.5 per cent between 1950 to 1955. After that, It fell steadily, and hit a low of zero before 2005. On the other hand, a dramatic decline was seen in death rate during early-years of the period. However, it will rise gradually during the end of period.

• 
  14017716_12111851588.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people [2]

Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives. In the ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make?

Sustaining to live full and active lives in elderly people can be obtained from the breakthrough of health and longer life duration. From such a phenomena, I totally sure that they can contribute to their circumstances. In this essay, I would like to point out two ways in which such people can gain advantages from such an interest, such as involving in family's occasions and consulting group.

Engaging into family's certain event is one of the approaches that old people can give benefits. They can show unique traditional games or sports in particular area for young people. If they love cooking, they may also train how to cook tasteful typical food in such a region. Valuable moral values can also be delivered to people who still do not know about attitude. Those examples are reasonable since they lived in the era that recent people still do not exist.

In addition, becoming involved in consulting association is one of the most beneficial ways. Old people can take into account in such an association based on their education background. According to such a method, some retired people are able to criticize the current politics while others might give several suggestions. Those who have experience about environment also could present great solutions to present-day problems related to their knowledge.

To sum up, cutting-edge health and longer life spans can make old people to pursuing their live fully and actively. While joining consulting affiliation is one of the most appropriate ways, taking on family's exclusive situation is also one of the ways to contribute.

Writing Feedback / In 2005, there were 27 million homes in United Kingdom, and most of them in private hands [2]

Task 1: The percentage of housing owned and rented in the UK

The proportion of housing owned and rented in the UK in 1985 and 2005 are presented in the pie charts. In 2005, there were 27 million homes which most of them are privately owned. However, both of privately owned and council rented contributed significantly in 1985.

In 2005, the privately owned gave virtually more than three-fourth of 27 million homes around UK which was the number one of contribution in housing owned and tented. The second place was given to council rented at around 15 per cent. While privately rented cintributed as same as council rented, there was only small percentage that showed in social housing.

More than half of 22 million homes in the UK were privately owned in 1985. The council rented in this year gave more proportion than in 2005 at around 30 per cent. On the other hand, privately rented contributed at certain number same as in 2005. However, there was a slight proportion that gave from social husing.

• 
  24039.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / A work that can give minimum salary should be obtained by people who remain jobless [2]

Some people believe that unemployed people should be made to work for their welfare/benefit payments. Others, however, see this as cheap labour.
Discuss the possible advantages and disadvantages of making unemployed people take any job.
Do you believe that making unemployed people work is a good idea?

Some parts of society argue that work that can give enough salary should be obtained for people who do not have any job. While others claim that they do not appropriate to get good payment as they are less expensive labour. In this essay, I believe that giving good work for unemployed humans is excellent idea since it will decrease the number of crime. However, the firm where they work will lack of budget.

Declining crime level of such a region is one of positive effects that can be obtained. If people have no idea to get welfare payments, they can become thief. Then, this phenomena will disturb rest of society. For example, according to police report of United States of America in 2013, there was correlation between number of crime and number of unemployed people. The number of crime fell down at 30 per cent. Such figure followed by decreasing the number of unemployed people in such an area.

In addition, many companies which hired unemployed people will be closed. This happened because the companies cannot give enough salary to all labour which are included ex-unemployed people. Those firms' budget will experience unbalance between income and outcome which the outcome is greater that the income itself. For instance, research from University of Texas reveals that virtually half of companies in Texas stopped their production in 2003 due to unbalance budget. Such a fact occurred since local government forced them to hire unemployed people.

To sum up, while some people claim that job which can give welfare payments should be made for unemployed people, others argue that policy will make many firms to close their activities. On the other hand, I believe that making unemployed people work is perfect idea since it will make the number of crime to decrease significantly.

Note - you will be suspended if you continue posting WEAK advice in other students' topics.

Writing Feedback / TED talks: Could we cure HIV with lasers? [3]

Could we cure HIV with lasers?
By Patience Mthunzi

Nowadays, if we suffer headache, we swallow pill of aspirin. Swallowing pill is the most effective and painless way of delivery any medication in body. However, there is big problem in HIV patient. They usually take anti-HIV drugs. While it is good for lowering virus in blood by increasing the CD4 cell counts, it gives bad effects. It can make blood to become dilute, experts usually call it "drug dilution".

Fortunately, there is latest technology that we can deliver anti-HIV directly to the HIV-infected cell by using lasers. Such a breakthrough technology has been used for dentistry. In this cutting-edge technology, we use laser pulses to drill extremely tiny holes which open and close HIV-infected cells to deliver drug. Although now it is still testing in test tubes, but the final goal is applying to human body. In the future, such a technology can lead to complete eradication of HIV in the body.

Writing Feedback / TED talks: My underwater robot for ocean exploration. [4]

My underwater robot
By David Lang

In recent days, NASA uses undersea laboratory combined with underwater robot to train astronauts and aquanauts in such an extreme condition. They use ROV (remote operated vehicle) robots to record video in deep sea across with ultra-thin wires back to computer topside. Such a ROV is open-source which means we can modify it without restriction. Such a cutting-edge technology is virtually 1,000 times cheaper than underwater robot that used in exploring Titanic.

ROV is usually used to explore the oceans for oil and gas exploration or construction. However, David Lang, the speaker, built the unique one. At the beginning, the idea came from him and his friend to search lost gold in the underwater cave. Due to lack of technology and money, the decided to ask in the internet, and they made web, namely openROV. In such a website, experts, like ocean engineers, could be involved. Because of such a brilliant idea, people around the world were interested, and supported them to make 'little company' that produced ROV kits that people could build ROV by themselves. Therefore, such a breakthrough will open the world with global ocean exploration.