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Posts by nandasharma
Name: Nanda
Joined: Dec 17, 2016
Last Post: Jan 13, 2017
Threads: 14
Posts: 36  
From: Nepal
School: St.Xaviers

Displayed posts: 50 / page 1 of 2
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nandasharma   
Jan 13, 2017
Writing Feedback / Writing 2: people think instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it [7]

Hope, this will help.

... others think that figurefiguring out how to (...) much worthy for consideration.
... both arguments are of equal importance.

Arlen, you've demonstrated a great consciousness as a writer, but I've to say you still need to work hard on Subject-Verb agreement, Vocabulary choice. Like here

: the government sign the agreement to decrease the CO2, the school ...

: the governments are cooperating on several agreements to decrease toxic carbon emissions, the educational institutions are enlightening the upcoming generation about environmental conservation and recycling...

nandasharma   
Jan 11, 2017
Essays / Help me to decide the content, length, structures of the scholarship essay below. [4]

@Holt This one is for a different college than my previous threads. I've divided it into three sections. I've skipped the list of my extracurricular and achievements, but I've talked about them on my second section. Check this out, please.

The rise :
As my neighbor, Mr.Shakya, had already threatened me a couple of times to not mess with his private (highly secured) network, I-a mischievous 8th grader- used to hole up in my bedroom when he frequently complained my parents about his dysfunctional ADSL router: by plotting a simple brute-force attack to theSubisu's (a National Internet Service Provider) network-bridge being incognito in the workgroup, I had gained access to his Wireless Nanostation and traced the family's entire devices' MAC addresses following the restriction of access from their own wireless network by activating the built-in MAC filtration protocol. With diverse technical skillsets regarding network topologies, I, however, never practiced severe cyber felony which could've critically injured several institutions' database & privacy and I'd be behind bars. This juvenile delinquency of manipulating wireless networks in vicinity-often bummed out my family and neighbors-was maneuvering my vehemence towards something revolutionary in Wireless technology:Utmost Reinforcement of Cyber Security. From controversial incidents like Russian intrusion in American election to the global economic treachery of Panama Papers, this omnipresence of cyber vulnerability psyched me up to enlighten myself with exclusive technical knowledge on Cyber Forensics as well as dedicate my effort towards strengthening of network security in my locality rather than the habitual commitment for cyber-infraction. I now believe that for strict maintenance of upright cyber-world, conventional digital communication paradigms ought to be equipped with Neuroscientific advancements-cum-Artificial Intelligence (A.I) capabilities. In reality, this obsession to investigate the feasibility of bio-neural connectivity, using Silicon chips and Nano-electronics, sparked in my psyche during a lecture on Human Anatomy- when the professor presented a flowchart that demonstrated the intercommunication between the nerve cells (Neurons) via electric impulses. Although I've been stranded in the technological archaism of my locale, I've still kept an eye on the researches and journals of several tech enthusiasts online. Through them I've realized that by following a biologically-hybrid principle of miniaturizing microelectronic and micro-electro-mechanical technologies for the realization of smart machineries from the molecular components, we can probably invent invulnerable systems, superbly optimized in terms of architecture, power consumption, intercommunication, and further motivate their installation as the building blocks for new energy-efficient and eco-friendly initiatives.

The making:
I aspired to build a robot the day I watched the sci-fi movie 'Robocop'. With random electronic parts and junk wires, I began soldering the kits without anyone's knowledge. The machine didn't really do anything-other than get me into trouble: it turned out that those "random" parts were rather costly RCA tubes preserved by my dad. Still, such household fiascoes didn't hold me back from participating in Yantra, a Robotics Team Competition featuring robotic moguls & brilliant high-schoolers with their sophisticated machineries, unlike my homemade recreational toys. Although I was acquainted with the programmability of microcontrollers, I lacked the knowledge of the Voice-delivery modules for my Information-bot. I was always a solitary techie getting my hands dirty in diverse technical entities: from making a bulletin software for my high-school administration to designing UX for an application of Jaycees foundation. I was ignorant of the significance of team-work in today's fluctuating technical empire because I didn't ever sense helpless while I was assigned any sort of responsibility related to my computing forte. One summer I trained myself to animate infographics while the next summer I mastered the art of mediocre computer programming. However, this moment wasn't one of those summer vacations and I was bound to team up with my Science Club buddies from high school. Throughout the process, I recollected all those thought-provoking discussions on Machine Learning & Language Processing I had been engaged in with my fellow techies from the Arniko's ICT & Science Club. I realized that those people were more than just few passersby of my high-school life, so I summoned a team for myself accomplished enough to compete in such a prestigious National event. The decision soon proved to be one of my wisest decisions, so far, as my friends implemented diverse skill-sets, from coding fluent voice-delivery mechanism to the embellishment of system architecture, in finalizing our robot's configuration. After a fortnight of restless collaboration for building our bot and finally contesting in the event, I was gratified to the nth degree while witnessing the dominance of team-effort over my past technical insularity. Although our team secured a minimal honor of 'Innovative Bot' in the competition, watching our creation do something as simple as speaking out few instructions was exhilarating, particularly when we had built it on a short notice with praiseworthy team-spirit. After my high-school graduation at Jhakaas Solutions(a mediocre tech firm), I not only teamed up with the cyber-security professionals as an intern, but I also picked up various technical skills and entrepreneurial experiences while the official crew labored to secure the workstations of a number of local Nepalese commercial enterprises from critical cyber offense.

At XXX COLLEGE:
XXX's prestigious science and research department equipped with state-of-the-art technology and pioneering approach towards learning is what I need to kick off my pursuit of lessening cybercrimes, not to mention perfecting Neural Networking with Deep learning progressions. Under the supervision of world's finest educators and researchers like Mr.Bradley and Thomas O'Copper, I will not only be getting mileage out of top-notch laboratories from early freshmen days, but I'll also be teaming up with Neuroscience & A.I. enthusiasts from the elite institutions like MIT & Harvard- via Dual Degree Engineering Program. XXX's high-tech arrangements on Harder Hall-Linux lab & Computer lab- along with several sophisticated computing and engineering courses, like Artificial Intelligence (CS-322), Numerical Algorithms (MC-316), etc. could enlighten me about the sustainable employment of futuristic technologies towards conglomeration of Neuroscience and A.I for Cyber Security: synthesis of a Neuro-scientifically Intelligent Cyber Space.

Having accomplished some appreciable leadership ventures at my community, I'm also looking forward to directing my own volunteering project through the prestigious Honors Forum. I'm truly excited about XXX's association with Pi Mu Epsilon; witnessing remarkable innovations and strategies on Mathematics from miscellaneous partakers at the annual conference will further broaden my scope of understanding as well as befriend me with some Mathematical virtuosos. Furthermore, I've premeditated to represent XXX's Mathematics division at the Hudson River Undergraduate Mathematics Conference by putting forward a research on 'Statistical Optimization of Neural Transceivers' and by further disclosing the significance of integrating statistical foundations with neuroscientific establishments for débuting an artificial neural internet.

On a bigger picture, I am also looking forward to being professionally involved in a major A.I plus Neuroscience project for substituting contemporarily dumb networking entities with neurologically smart technology and revolutionizing the conventional digital storage and processing mechanisms for the sake of cybersecurity. Despite being an unprecedented communication paradigm,Intelligent Nano-networking demands an interdisciplinary approach with backings from highly experienced group of elites equipped with satisfactory infrastructures, which I readily discover at XXX.
nandasharma   
Jan 9, 2017
Scholarship / 'the idea of being a doctor has developed in my mind' I am writing an essay for APIASF scholarship [4]

I hope these edits will help,

The awe of discovering (...),...these things never grow old.

The awe-inspiring culture of examining the human anatomy, the trustworthiness deserved for prescribing a specific treatment, the gratitude of serving the recovery of the fatalities. These are the moments that I'll cherish the most in my near future.

Vy, I felt that you've not understood the core demand of this prompt. Though you've fully explained your current and future endeavors regarding education, but I think the prompt is wanting to know about the impact you're gonna create which will not only maneuver your future, but also that of others. I can say that you can dig more deeper and present a more intriguing response. Otherwise, you've done quite a job. Well done.
nandasharma   
Jan 9, 2017
Essays / Help me to decide the content, length, structures of the scholarship essay below. [4]

interests, activities and scholarly interests



Please type up a list of any extra-curricular science and math activities you have been involved in (e.g., school clubs, academic teams, tutoring, relevant volunteer work, shadowing/internship experiences, independent studies, summer research programs, etc.) and any awards/honors you have received (e.g., science fair competitions, science or math Olympiad medals, high testing, etc.). Then underneath the list, write a brief essay discussing:

(a) your interests in science and/or mathematics,
(b)how the activities you list above have helped you grow as a scientist and/or mathematician, and
(c) how you hope to pursue your scholarly interests at our college.

nandasharma   
Jan 7, 2017
Scholarship / Bucknell University Scholarship for Creative Writing - Ray Bucknell! [7]

@garibari

What skills or interests would you offer Bucknell's writing community?

Though you've mentioned a bunch of skillsets you possess as a creative writer, but you gotta have some interrelationship with your own capabilites and how are they going to impact the campus, as a whole? Will it be effective in teaching your peers something special, never before seen in any any student.? You gotta dig deeper than that. Research Bucknell's website and sort out different aspects of the Bucknell which will welcome your special skill. Then, relate it to yourself. That's all the prompt is asking for.

Best.
nandasharma   
Jan 7, 2017
Undergraduate / "How you would use the education you obtain at our institution ?" (250) [4]

@Holt
The previous essays where I referred to Khan Academy were each for different colleges. No offence taken, but I understand your concern about the redundancy of Khan. For your information, I've only used that word for a single essay of a single college. How is my article overall, Holt? You just commented about Khan, is that all ? :D
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Undergraduate / "How have you overcome an obstacle or challenge you have faced in your life ?" (250) [2]

Describe an obstacle or challenge you have faced in your life. How have you overcome this challenge and grown from this experience?

common difficulties of life in Nepal



Imagine growing up in Nepal with frequent "bandhas" (worker strikes) and political riots. The party-political tussle has overshadowed crucial national concerns: not only the economy but also the continuity of education.

I was in Grade 12 when the Madhesi political forum announced a vicious series of bandhas. Not a single school gambled the safety of its students and institutional entities from day-1: those who dared, either had their students assaulted or their school-buses torched by the activists. Afflicted with this preposterous intrusion into my regular academics, I, accompanied with my high-school buddies, worked out a peaceable revolt. We approached the college/school officials with an appeal to side with us against the Madhesi movement; however, only few roughnecks showed up the following morning to join our demonstration ahead of the Chief District Office. I even took it to the social media and the local newspapers to summon more dissatisfied individuals to fight for our fundamental 'right to education'. After few weeks of remonstration, backed by several humanitarian & academic enterprises, the spokesperson of Madhesi forum finally approved the normal functioning of educational institutes.

That was the pandemonium where I was raised. Had I never teamed up with my friends on that audacious venture, I, and the rest of high-schoolers, couldn't have accomplished the curriculum in time. Thus, I endorse 'schools' as far-reaching platforms for canvassing one's political ideologies, but not for sustaining outrageous interferences. I've now realized the essence of a Hindu proverb-Tolerating injustice is a bigger crime than doing it.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Essays / Rochester Supplement on applying my powers to 'things needed to be done.' [6]

..how you properly apply your powers to 'things needed to be done....

This my friend is a pretty demanding topic. I'd suggest you to dig a lot deeper and finalize how have you impacted you locale. I'm sure you've done an interesting and influential task. Mention that in brief and repost here, as the word limit is ridiculously just 100.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Undergraduate / "How you would use the education you obtain at our institution ?" (250) [4]

Discuss a significant issue in your home country about which you are passionate and describe how you would use the education you obtain at our institution to create positive civic and social change once you return home. Please provide specific examples.

my plans and aims for the future



Though a landlocked nation, Nepal possesses a vast hydropower potential-the perennial Nepalese rivers and the gradient landscape provide ideal settings for the development of some of the world's largest hydroelectric powerplants. As per the recent statistics, Nepal has approximately forty-thousand megawatts of economically achievable hydropower potentiality. Thanks to frequent political dilemmas and the government's sloppiness in exploitation of National treasury, meager six-hundred megawatts of hydropower is hardly generated. The bitter reality is that only about 40% of Nepalese have access to electricity. With such miserable scenarios, it is significant for Nepal to upturn its energy reliance on renewable resources.

After an epoch of miscellaneous scientific and extracurricular explorations at XXX, I'm looking forward to investments of my XXX engineering expertise-achieved via the Dual-Degree program-for productive operation of hydroelectricity projects at regional/national level. I'll abide by the fundamentals of Environmental preservation and sustainability- as I've planned to minor in Environmental Science- while contributing towards the urbanization of national hydropower generators. With the academic benediction from some of the world's finest physicists and environmental scientists like MR.ABC and ROXY, I'll have the upper hand in my objective of launching eco-friendly solar and wind-power enterprises at a national platform. These feasible undertakings will radically improve Nepal's infrastructural integrity by making electricity accessible in isolated territories, which will be followed by the availability of modern electrical appliances to the ignorant population. Conclusively, my aim will also be to deescalate the national illiteracy by launching an educational web-portal: something like Khan Academy.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Undergraduate / 'What you have learned about yourself as a result of the volunteering activities.' (250) [2]

Discuss your current involvement in community service projects and volunteer activities. Describe what you have learned about yourself as a result of these activities.

science-cum-engineering aficionado and artistic-cum-philanthropic



As an active volunteer of XXX, I routinely assist my district's chapter during disaster management & health care missions. After several training sessions on handling of pharmaceutical apparatuses and medications, I was even assigned by the society's President to supervise a couple of blood donation and health check-up campaigns through which I not only gained hands-on medical skills of preserving blood samples & measuring blood pressure, but I also felt an unusual delight while examining, diagnosing the symptoms, and suggesting minor prescriptions to the participants. Despite being a science-cum-engineering aficionado, I am eventually aware of my pharmacological gusto.

During my entire student life, I'd partaken in none of the school theatricals; however, the XXX's initiative in collecting charity for the quake victims of 25th April, 2015 as well as enlightening the passersby about Earthquake preparedness through an influential street play seemed worthy of my participation. We performed an act called 'Eghharaw Pachaas'- translated into English as Eleven Fifty, the approximate time of the catastrophic 2015's tremor- in eventful spots around the city. Through this artistic-cum-philanthropic venture with my XXX colleagues, I garnered an unprecedented acclaim for my appreciable dramatics, not to mention I discovered my new avatar. I am not just a bookworm burning midnight oil to sustain magnificent academics or an athlete toiling behind the soccer nets for the triumph, but I've come out as a 'Hero'-a compelling stimulus towards the renovation and attentiveness of several unacquainted-but-wounded individuals simply via a street performance.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Undergraduate / Your 'ability to do' will appear in other parts of this application. The 'things needed to be done.' [3]

@marcusimwj

independent thinkers who create positive change in their communities.

This my friend is a pretty simplistic approach towards such a demanding topic. I'd suggest you to dig a lot deeper and finalize how have you impacted you locale, rather than making a couple of orphans happy for a moment. I'm sure you've done a more interesting and influential task than that. Mention that in brief, as the word limit is ridiculously just 100.

Best.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Essays / What unique in Soccer and Economics courses? And what inspired you to apply to Union? Supplement [4]

@Ranaomershehzad
You can include an anecdote that will describe your passion to pursue Economics in Union. When it comes to Soccer, just elaborate on your athletic participation history and specific achievements (if any). I'd recommend to keep the spotlight over Economics rather than Soccer. A brief description of an extracurricular activity is acceptable, but a long and boring text just for soccer could be fatal to your overall presentation.

Best.
nandasharma   
Jan 6, 2017
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 - Compare the merits and demerits of having a car. [2]

I think the following edits would be more suitable:

Nowadays, many people believe that cars bring possess more positive attributes than the negative ,..

Cars are the easiest and cheapest mean of transportation, indeed.

...he wants due to the availability of urbane infrastructures in the most of the places ...

I am convinced that the utilization of cars should still continue.

George, overall the diction use is fine and your content is also appreciable. Well done. I advice you to use the connecting words only when necessary. Overuse of those tools can be fatal for your presentation. So, use it but under limit.
nandasharma   
Jan 4, 2017
Undergraduate / "Describe a situation when you transformed your thoughts about a topic" (100 words or less) [2]

Describe A Time When You Changed Your Opinion About An Issue. What Led You To Hold This Opinion In The First Place And What Led You To Change Your Views?

Inhaling the toxicity



Having grown up in a greenish plateau of eastern Nepal unacquainted with any of the environmental contamination, I used to acknowledge modern means of transportation as the eco-friendly chariots of human locomotion until I witnessed its dreadful ecological consequences during a month-long stay at Kathmandu: Nepal's capital city, home to more than a million citizens, is facing elevated levels of air pollution, thanks to rapid industrialization, rising vehicular emissions and deforestation. Being stuck at a traffic jam in one busy morning on my way to The American Library radically altered my perspective of automobiles' usability- human irrationalism.
nandasharma   
Jan 4, 2017
Writing Feedback / The proportion of primary need expenditures in Malaysia and Japan in 2010 [2]

@ichaa
I've made the following necessary corrections.

Overall, it can be vividly observed that the least investments were made towards health care in both of the nations...

The largest proportion was witnessed in Japan which made it to stand in the first rate with around 29%....

While observing another statistics, the least household expenditure in both countries was in transport and health care with each having variable percentage of primary need. However, a domination of more than double was witnessed for Japan.

I would focus more over structuring your article. Two paragraphs would be enough for this text.
nandasharma   
Jan 4, 2017
Undergraduate / "What Would It Mean To You To Call Yourself A part of our university?" (100 words or less) [2]

the Megamind



Besides XXX University's appealing location, top-notch science & research infrastructures, familial community and outstanding extracurricular idiosyncrasies, I was awed by myriad opportunities it had in its pocket for me, not to mention its interdisciplinary schooling. I would not only just elevate athleticism amongst my fellow classmates or diversify the student body with exhibition of Hindu-Nepalese cultures, but I would also pick up miscellaneous academic/non-academic experiences which would succor my technological resolutions-mostly directed towards strengthening of cyber security by enlightening myself with XXX University's superlative Mathematics academics accompanied with exploitation of the state-of-the-art technologies like the Megamind of College of Arts & Sciences.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / Art can soar economy of the country - spending money for it [5]

@Omerzafar
Here are some edits:

Turkey is famous for it isits art , overwhelming majority of tourismnumber of tourists come from divergent nations s...

You can probably correct several common grammatical errors by revising your essay yourself. I find a lot of simple Subject-Verb disagreements, Article Mismatches..so on. Do that and repost it again.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / Overpopulation of urban areas - problems and solutions [2]

@lalodhi
Here are few suggestions from me.

..., there has been significant rise in the urban population...
... and governments need to collaborate for tackling the overpopulation issues .

this sounds quite immature.
In this essay, I would assert on problems ...

Better write this:
The following essay will discuss about various problems and solutions regarding over-population in today's industrialized society.before delivering an appropriate conclusion.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Undergraduate / Reciting a poem backwards. Lehigh. You've just reached your one million hit on your youtube video. [7]

@alexgzm
It's still not about your talent that you learned when you're little. The prompt is directly asking you about how you utilize the Youtube service. Imagine you made a video about something that was productive for a lot of people/students, not just something about your freaky talent. Think much deeper and state what would you use as your video content that impacted several lives. Then, repost your essay agian.

Best.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Undergraduate / She knows what it feels like to be strong in STEM as a female. Barnard [5]

What would you talk about?...

Then, you gotta have a more serious topic to discuss about, not just about the importance of encouraging woman to go into STEM fields, but something like The Impact of Calculus in Modern Astrophysics, The Rocket Science women figure..or something more interesting. Furthermore, I would recommend you to talk more about the specific topic you'll discuss with her than using unnecessary aesthetic statements. When it comes to your ending statement, I prefer the Red one to the Blue one, since it displays a little bit of aggressiveness within you.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Undergraduate / Through soccer I comprehended the significance of 'team-work' [2]

Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. (150 word limit)

Soccer and it's meaning for my development



Maintaining brilliant academics and community liveliness, simultaneously, demanded a true commitment; however, sometimes between the rush of my humanitarian and scholastic responsibilities, I teamed up with my District's and High-School's Soccer players in several competitive tournaments: HISSAN Cup 2072-73 B.S., Ganeshman Singh Cup, etc. Through soccer I comprehended the significance of 'team-work' for the triumph- be it in an academic pursuit (group science-projects) or an extracurricular longing (athletic team-events). Apart from providing a beneficent physical and mental workout, Soccer made me a guru in strategical planning and tactical thinking since I served as my team's Central Defender to create an indestructible formation of defenders and mid-fielders during crucial finales. I realized the benefits of fitness in a student's life as I could concentrate and succeed in my academic endeavors better than before. Thus, I can confidently comment that Soccer contributed a lot to make me a diligent and versatile student.
nandasharma   
Dec 26, 2016
Undergraduate / I am an elastic and completely down-to-earth guy. A note to my future roommate. (250) [12]

@Holt
Mary, Hackathon doesn't mean something that could harm the college's network. You misinterpreted that word. Even colleges themselves organize Hackathon events periodically. It's just a computing challenge to ensure competitiveness among the students towards Science/Technology. You needn't worry about that. Anyways, thanks again.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / Nepal matters. Am I on the right track of this essay ? [6]

@Holt
With all due respect, don't you think the topic is itself asking for a wide observation (without any specific limit) ? If so, then would it work if I reduce the range of my article to the society where I grew up or my district ? What do you say ?
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / COLLABORATION AND THE TECHNOLOGICAL REVOLUTION [9]

@Holt
It was actually a team-event and also I've clarified that in my latest version of the essay (not posted). Are you telling me that showing an individualistic participation will be more impressive than mentioning the whole team ?
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / Nepal matters. Am I on the right track of this essay ? [6]

What matters to you, and why? (100 to 250 words)

Nepal, my country



My country is on the brink of annihilation due to its never-ending political vulnerability. Neither the citizens nor the players of the constitution are aware of the impending catastrophe. Nepal is landlocked and doesn't own a sophisticated military (powerless defense ministry with archaic equipment) or a backup energy resource (not a single productive thermonuclear/solar/wind power-plant)- under neighboring nations' thumb for many years- and it's a matter of shame and jeopardy for entire Nepal to be listed as one of the weakest countries. The info-graphics on media which exhibit disturbing statistics concerning the deterioration of the only few functional hydroelectricity projects spurs an ambition to strengthen Nepal's infrastructural integrity with inauguration of sustainable energy industry. So, in my case I'm going to maneuver the question as 'Why the future of Nepal matters to you the most?'. Having struggled my entire student-life through reiterative load-shedding(power-cuts) and 'Bandhas' (nerve-wracking political insurgencies), I can't soft-pedal the inevitable crisis my country's going to face due to its long-delayed alertness towards political tranquility and renewable energy production. I care about the agro-based Nepalese commerce and want to invest every inch of my knowledge to trigger an Industrial revolution- the only hope for Nepal's prosperity. I care about Nepal's abundant water resources and want to generate hydro-power from every drop of it. This is not me being egotist for my motherland, but I realize the gravity of global energy crisis while the rest of us are taking endangered resources for granted.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / Lafayette College Supplement: "Why Lafayette?" "Why do you do what you do?" [11]

Originally, I was searching for engineering universities as my tertiary education destinations, [...] For reasons cannot be fully explained here.

I would recommend you not to include this unnecessary information about your college browsing. Since the word count is limited, so you better invest those precious lines describing your impressions regarding the facilities. Overall, the composition is OK. Please repost after making the necessary recommended changes.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / COLLABORATION AND THE TECHNOLOGICAL REVOLUTION [9]

@Holt
Thanks a lot. How about these edits?

However, this time I had to reach out to my Science Club buddies: which proved to be one of my wisest decisions as my friends implemented diverse skill-sets, from coding fluent voice-delivery mechanism to the embellishment of system architecture, for the finalization of our bot.

I was gratified to the nth degree .... Although our team secured a minimal honor of 'Innovative Bot' in the competition, watching our creation do something as simple as speaking few instructions was exhilarating, particularly when we had built it at a short notice with praiseworthy team-spirit.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / I am an elastic and completely down-to-earth guy. A note to my future roommate. (250) [12]

@Holt
I'm extremely sorry if my previous response offended you by any means. I just wanted your further suggestions for editing some specific parts of my essay. That's all. You needn't apologize to me. I'm the one seeking help from you. :) How can I add some aesthetic touches to these kinda responses ?
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / I am an elastic and completely down-to-earth guy. A note to my future roommate. (250) [12]

@Holt
As far as I'm concerned this essay is meant only for the Admissions Committee to review my other extra capabilities/interests rather than for matching perfect room partners at dorms. I respect your thoughts on inserting the sentimental connections that I'd develop with my future mate, but the word limit denies any changes and I'm also very satisfied with this. But, if you think I could insert your words somewhere in between my current text, then I'd be more than happy to do so. I think the statement "Conclusively, we both shall have a lot of fun despite XXX's rigorous curriculum." will do your job.

Thanks.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / COLLABORATION AND THE TECHNOLOGICAL REVOLUTION [9]

@Holt
I think I've clearly mentioned the Voice Delivery system as the major issue for our robot, and also I learned several important skills from my partners

as I soaked up diverse skill-sets regarding apt coding platforms for robotics with the embellishment of system architecture and exteriors.

;However, I've made the following changes.

I was unsure about the configuration of the Voice-delivery modules for my Information-bot.

I lacked the knowledge of the Voice-delivery modules for my Information-bot.

Science Club buddies (from High-school): ...

Science Club buddies: which proved to be one of my wisest decisions as I implemented diverse skillsets from my friends regarding apt codes for voice-delivery and the embellishment of system architecture with exteriors for the finalization of our bot. After a fortnight of restless collaboration for constructing our robot
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / I am an elastic and completely down-to-earth guy. A note to my future roommate. (250) [12]

Virtually all of XXX's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate -- and us -- know you better. (100 to 250 words)

Let's have fun together - letter to my eventual roomie



Dear future roommate,
I am an elastic and completely down-to-earth guy. I can adjust at any viable circumstances you wish for. If you are much of an anti-social nerd then I could study like a madman with you or I could organize a mini-hackathon inside our dormitory featuring only you and I tackling various mathematical/computing challenges-just like I used to compete with my siblings back at home. However, if you are an outgoing fellow who shares his ideas/imaginations with colleagues to venture on an ambitious academic/extracurricular pursuit, then I'm the roomie of your dreams. I love playing music-I hope you won't crush my guitar someday- and I'm looking forward to having several jam-sessions after our long hours of study/assignments for our recreational purpose. At our leisure, I could briefly introduce you to the diverse cultural fiestas of Nepal and momentarily you may also find yourself chatting with me in Nepalese since I'm a 'brilliant tutor'- as quoted by my classmates, students and teachers-, so you needn't worry a pinch even if you get flustered by a professor's lecture or a complex numerical: I'll always attempt my fullest. I'm also a sports enthusiast-be it an indoor board game or an outdoor athletic adventure, you can always count me in. I believe in working smart than working hard so I adhere to going to bed and getting up early for my academic pursuits rather than burning midnight oil. Conclusively, we both shall have a lot of fun despite XXX's rigorous curriculum.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / 'Can I be the next team captain?' A bizarre situation and my reaction [3]

@shuprova
When the prompt asks you

a problem and/or an unfamiliar situation.

, then you gotta take the demand of it seriously. Your essay seems extremely common among several related articles I've seen. Think about a major upheaval of your life. Something that was a bit devastating not only for your academic life but also for your beloveds. This way the reader will pay more attention to your article. Please do revise your essay more seriously.

Best.
nandasharma   
Dec 25, 2016
Undergraduate / COLLABORATION AND THE TECHNOLOGICAL REVOLUTION [9]

XXX students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development. (100 to 250 words)

Collaboration and the technological revolution



I aspired to build a robot the day I watched the sci-fi fiction 'Robocop'. With random electronic parts and junk wires, which I had procured from my family's junk box, I began soldering the greenish electric kits without anyone's knowledge. The machine didn't really do anything-other than get me into trouble. My brother informed me that those "random" parts were rather costly RCA tubes. Still, such household fiascoes didn't hold me back from participating in Yantra, a National Robotics Competition featuring robotic moguls & brilliant high-schoolers with their sophisticated machinery, unlike my homemade recreation toys. Although I was acquainted with the programmability of microelectronics, I was unsure about the configuration of the Voice-delivery modules for my Information-bot. I was always a solitary techie getting my hands dirty in diverse technical entities: from making a bulletin software for my high-school administration to designing UX for an application of Junior Jaycees humanitarian foundation. However, this time the state of helplessness urged me to collaborate with some handy Science Club members and after a fortnight of restless collaboration, the bot was ready. Ultimately, although my team seemed disappointed for just securing the 'Innovative-bot' honor, I was gratified to the nth degree after witnessing the dominance of team-effort over my technical insularity. Without my team's backing, my participation would have been a shaggy-dog story. Watching our creation do something as simple as speaking few instructions was exhilarating, particularly when we had built it with praiseworthy team-spirit. Collaboration is the soul of contemporary technological revolution.
nandasharma   
Dec 24, 2016
Undergraduate / Lehigh Essay. What do you and Lehigh have in common? [8]

@alexgzm
Alejandro , here is the thing, you should be writing a straightforward comparison essay of the commonalities between you and the university that you have chosen to apply to. This is an introspective essay. For me, I think that this was not a recommended response to answer this type of question. Thus, my suggestion is that it is better for you to directly state the answer briefly in the beginning of your answer and elaborate / explain the details afterwards.The similarities between the two will come from the way that you share some ideologies with the school.
nandasharma   
Dec 22, 2016
Essays / My impact on communities. Help me to understand the demand of the following supplemental essay . [5]

@Holt
I prepared the following essay by incorporating words from my earlier article for engineering college. Hope this will work ?

As my neighbor, Mr.Shakya, had already threatened me a couple of times to not mess with his private (highly secured) network, I-a mischievous 8th grader- used to hole up in my bedroom when he frequently complained my parents about his dysfunctional ADSL router: by plotting a simple brute-force attack to the Subisu's(a National ISP) network-bridge being incognito in the workgroup, I had gained access to his Wireless Nanostation and traced the family's entire devices' MAC addresses following the restriction of access from their own wireless network by activating the built-in MAC filtration protocol. With diverse technical skillsets regarding network topologies, I, however, never practiced severe cyber felony which could critically injure several institutions' database and privacy as well as lead me behind bars. This juvenile delinquency of manipulating wireless networks in vicinity-which bummed out my family and neighbors-was maneuvering my enthusiasm towards something groundbreaking in Wireless technology: Extreme Strengthening of Digital Security. From controversial incidents like Russian intrusion in American election to global economic treachery of Panama Papers, this omnipresence of vulnerability in cyber security psyched me up to enlighten myself with exclusive technical knowledge on Cyber Forensics as well as dedicate my time and labor for tightening of network security in my locality rather than the usual commitment towards cyber-infraction. I have concluded that for strict maintenance of upright cyber-world, classical digital communication paradigms ought to be revised for the nanoscale with Artificial Intelligence (A.I) capabilities.

XXX's prestigious science and engineering department equipped with state-of-the-art technology and pioneering approach towards education is what I need to kick off my pursuit of lessening cybercrimes, not to mention perfecting database management with flawless web transmission. By offering interdisciplinary science program, XXX provides a unified platform for engineering and computer science not available in any other institution, and forges fundamental links between modern mathematics and technological engineering. Under the supervision of world's finest educators and researchers like Takunari Miyazaki and Nancy M. Fleming, I will not only be getting mileage out of top-notch laboratory facilities from my early freshmen days, but I'll also be teaming up with Nanoscience & A.I. enthusiasts from other science/engineering faculties. Apart from getting my hands dirty by designing molecular transceivers and motors for short-range calcium signaling or crafting electromagnetic channel models and protocols for an efficacious long-range pheromonal Nano networking, XXX's Electron Microscopy Facility equipped with the recherché infrastructures of Transmission & Scanning Electron Microscopes along with several sophisticated computing courses, particularly Artificial Intelligence(CPSC 382) & Computer Security(CPSC 385) could enlighten me about the futuristic technologies regarding their sustainable employment towards conglomeration of Nanoscience and A.I for Cyber Security: synthesis of a Nano-scientifically Intelligent Computer Network.

After an epoch of miscellaneous scientific explorations at XXX, I am looking forward to being professionally involved in a major A.I project for substitution of contemporarily dumb networking entities with nanoengineered smart technology and revolutionizing the conventional digital storage and processing mechanisms for the sake of cybersecurity, not to mention my mission to deescalate the national illiteracy by launching an education web portal- something like Khan Academy, but more accessible to the geographically remote regions of Nepal. On a bigger picture, by following a biologically-hybrid principle of miniaturizing microelectronic and micro-electro-mechanical technologies accompanied with the realization of smart nanomachines from the molecular components, I am determined to invent invulnerable systems, which are superbly optimized in terms of architecture, power consumption, communication, and motivate their utilization as the building blocks for new energy-efficient and eco-friendly initiatives. This undertaking will ensure a breakthrough in economics, sustainable commercial growth, homeland security, healthcare accompanied with the lessening of devastating cyber offenses in today's digital empire, simultaneously, via heavily encrypted mechanisms buttressed by nanotechnology and A.I for every online business. Despite being an unprecedented communication paradigm, Intelligent Nano-networking demands an interdisciplinary approach with backings from highly experienced and qualified group of elites equipped with satisfactory infrastructural commodities, which I readily discover at XXX's engineering department.
nandasharma   
Dec 21, 2016
Undergraduate / 'I am determined to invent invulnerable systems' - Engineering College Supplemental Essay. (650) [5]

@Holt I made the following change for clarification of my "Merging Nanoscience with CyberSecurity" purpose.

Moreover, the infrastructures of Center of Advanced Computing-Red Cloud, DataDirect Networks- along with those dedicated for Nano-scientific researches could enlighten me about the futuristic technologies regarding their sustainable employment towards conglomeration of Nano-engineering and Cyber Security: synthesis of a supreme Nano-scientific Computer Network.
nandasharma   
Dec 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / Higher fuel price to solve the ever-increasing environmental hazards throughout the world [2]

@krempetkov
George, No offense but hiking up the price of the fuel sounds ridiculous/childish and also not quite practical. Behind the process of increasing the price, there comes several conventions and arrangements regarding the share market. So, if you wish to mention those informations then your article would be a little more acceptable.

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