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Posts by rozha [Suspended]
Joined: Jun 12, 2013
Last Post: Sep 9, 2015
Threads: 15
Posts: 34  
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From: Iraq

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rozha   
Sep 9, 2015
Writing Feedback / Human Trafficking - An Underlying Issue in Today's Society [2]

Human trafficking is a modern form of slavery involving the illegal trade of people for exploitation or commercial gain.

You will divide your passage in to introduction,body,and conclusion.
rozha   
Sep 8, 2015
Writing Feedback / spending on health education and preventative measures (prevention is better than cure) [NEW]

In wealthy countries,the focus of clinical care is changing from cure to prevention,to anticipate future diseases in currently healthy individuals.Treatment are intended to cure or alleviate symptoms and signs.By contrast, prevention is done to ward off something in the future.That is why government should expend hug amount of money from health budget for cure related education as well as preventative measures.

However,quality and affordable medical treatment is important,but staying healthy and disease-free depends even more on where we live,work,learn,and play. So many people,especially those from low-income communities still suffer every day from preventable illness.Most of the risk factors for diseases are behaviour-related.Behaviour choices such as smoking,unhealthy eating and physical inactivity,increase the chances of developing deadly and costly diseases.Ensuring a consistent funding stream for public health is a good stride toward strengthening the nations public health system.For instance,if government fund health sectors to make people awareness about health hazard of smoking or inactivity that are the main causes of cardiovascular diseases and lung cancer,by this way they can prevent a lot of diseases and can safe a huge amount of money that they need to treat those kinds of diseases.

In addition, some diseases like AIDS and cancers treatment are not so effective and needs a lot of money to management,but some preventive measurements are so effective to decrease the chances to get these kinds of mortal diseases and need a small budget.For example, advertisements on TV ,magazines, and etc, about the precautions and how you can have good and healthy life style.

In conclusion, so government should allocate significant amount of health budget to prevention and health education.This will have postive impact on public health as well as on governments financial system.
rozha   
Jul 18, 2013
Writing Feedback / globalization and its advatages and disadvantages [2]

Globalization is a series of social, cultural, economical, technological, and political changes that promote interdependence and growth. Globalization raises the standard of living in developing countries. spreads technological knowledge and increases political liberation. It is a historical process that results from human innovation and technological progress. It has so many solution for world s problems . Its advantages outweigh disadvantages.

One of the benefit of globalization is an increased human development index (H.D.I). It is a measurement of a country s social, political , and economical growth in comparison to the other countries in the world. It depends on many factors one of them is fertility rate. For instance, if fertility rate decreases it is usually an indication that there is an increase in women s liberation . Probably, women are no longer facing as much social pressure to have lots of children and stay home.

Another benefit of globalization is increasing of opportunities for employment. The migration of people has became easier and has led to better job opportunities.

Furthermore, globalization makes competition in the markets. No longer does one find limited number of commodities available. A particular commodity may fetch hundreds of options with different prices. The product quality has been enhanced so as to retain the customers.

In fact, technology is always evolving , globalization will always be evolving as well. Some believe that it has a lot of ill-effects up on the society, such as, losing of cultures, because of the advanced technological progress nowadays , it is a lot easier to access other cultures and know about them . Even though ,This can lead to cultural conflicts and disagreement.

As well as that, health issues are always on the horizon when globalization takes effect. Easily travelling people will come to term with new diseases and facing new illnesses. For instance, HIV was diagnosed in Africa for the first time , now it exists in many countries. Transporting foods and live stock will have the same effect nonetheless.

In addition, to the negative effect on environment , deforestation is one of the major headaches to contend with in the countries involved in globalization. That is all due to non-availability of land where it creates an imbalance in the ecosystem , leading to climate change.

In conclusion, The world has became closer and smaller day by day. It might not be in our hand to control it. But it is totally up to us where we can go with it. We humans have always come out on top in time of big challenges.
rozha   
Jul 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / Parents vs classmates child's education; child copy each other's habits [4]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Classmates are a more important influence than parents on a child's success in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Children spend their times at home and at school, both parents and classmates have their influence on children success. This question is controversial because it is different from a child to another one. I can not completely agree with the statement that classmates are more influence than parents on a child s success in school.

classmates have a significant effect on child s behavior and his or her success in school. Children spend much time at school. Classmates have many things in common such as age,interests, homework, and classes after all. So, they discuss their impressions about a new teacher, solve problems together, learn their homework, gain new knowledge and experience , and even make their own new discoveries. Sharing all these make them closer. Some of them become friends and they spend after-school time together. For instance , my brother was a good student at school he always got high grade, his classmate was not a good student. When he became my brothers friend, they spend most of their time together. My brother had a positive effect on him made him became a good student.

Furthermore, parents have a great impact on child s success. It depends on the parent how much they care about their child. For example, if a parent show an interest in their child s progress and talk to him or her about the success and importance of learning , of course, that child listen to them and do his or her best. Parent can change the attitude of their child toward studying in school and it is essential to him or her to succeed.

Finally, parent and classmate collectively have a great role in child s success in school. parent should be careful about their child and his or her friends also because, friends tend to copy each other's habits and manners.
rozha   
Jul 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; GRADES ARE A GOOD INDICATOR FOR ASSESSING STUDENTS [4]

Grade is a good indicator of students knowledge. It encourages student to effort more and analyze their mistakes. Most of teachers can evaluate their students in a best way by their grades in the examinations and make a competition between them. The difference between their grades is a good motivator which makes them to try and learn more to get a high grade. Of course it may have some drawbacks.

Sometimes this encouragement makes a jealousy and hatred between students. For instance , when a student beside of a great effort and studying who cant get a high grade it makes him or her feels inferiority and has hatred about their classmates, teachers and school. Teachers should be very careful when they convey the students grades. They will not neglect the feeling of their students about their grades because sensible students which may have a bad reflection to his or her grade. for example, some students may attempt suicide when they know they can not get a high grade. The role of teachers is a very important in this situation.

In addition to this, students have some kind of competition among each other for higher grades. When a student gets a higher grade than another one, the second student asks himself: "Why i do not have this grade? Is it something wrong with me? Is he better than me? ". I think every student at least one time asked himself or herself this question.

Finally , there is no doubt that grades encourage students to learn and gain more experience, knowledge, be more self-confident and persistent.
rozha   
Jul 15, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay Money is the best way to motivate people [10]

I will try my best to give a proper feedback from now on. As my english is not very good i am just scared to comment. I have really benefited from this website and would be very sad if i was suspended. I appreciate the notice and hopefully will do better in the future.
rozha   
Jul 15, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay Money is the best way to motivate people [10]

huyenanh1508
SemehenM:Nowadays the employers use different instruments in order to stimulate their laborers to work better and faster....can we use (encourage ) instead of ( stimulate )?
rozha   
Jul 14, 2013
Writing Feedback / People do many different things to stay healthy. 'not skip our breakfast' [6]

Nowadays, the life style of human have changed because we live in a technological world. Most of people have a busy schedules , they do not have time to care their health. There are so many simple things we can do to stay healthy .

simple way to get healthy is that we will not skip our breakfast, it is full of dietary fiber it gives us energy a long the day . If we do not have breakfast we remain starve for a long time then our appetite increase it makes us eat more and this has a bad impact on our health. for instance, i remember when i was a student at the day of examination i could not eat my breakfast because of stress but, when i finished the exam i ate more because i was hungry sometimes i got abdominal pain. Another thing to we should do to remain healthy is " drinking water" water is involved in every function in our body, we will drink at least right glasses of water a day. We will eat healthy diet is an essential components of good health . Vitamin deficiency in our boy can produce disease such as, vitamin C deficiency causes Scurvy. Humans are social animals. Connecting with other people and forming bonds of communication and intimacy nourish our emotional and spiritual health. In this day and age, people can become increasingly cut off from others, leading to increase in prevalence of depression and feeling of isolation. The increasing use of internet , allowing us to connect with other via email and chat groups while remaining in the isolation of our home. Furthermore, we will express our emotions appropriately, inappropriate expression of emotions which leads to physical and mental symptoms. For example, inappropriate expression of anger is thought to affect the Liver. We will also eat fresh fruits and vegetables daily. Fruits and vegetables supply many nutrients that are important for our health. Spending at least 30 minutes outdoors is another way to get health because sunlight is so good for our health it produces vitamin D. However, many of us don't get nearly enough activity to stay fit, due to sedentary jobs and lifestyles, busy schedules, etc. Walking is one of the best forms of exercise and almost anyone can do it.

Finally, i believe that people will think from his or her health before everything . If humans stay healthy can do their work in a better way. unhealthy life style can also have a bad effect on society in an indirect way.
rozha   
Jul 12, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL - Do you like comfortable living or large amount of money? [4]

When we are considering options for a major field in college, the counselor often mention the amount of money that we can expect to earn if we make that career choice. Then it is up to us to decide whether it is important to make large amounts of money or whether we are satisfied to earn a comfortable living . Certainly , there are good reasons for both decisions.

If we make a lot of money, it will be possible to provide a better standard of living for our families. We can live in better home, our children can go to more prestigious schools and participate in activities or take lessons, we can go on vacations and have experiences that would be impossible without the financial resources that a high- paying job produces. We can enjoy what the material world has to offer because we can pay for it. Beside supporting our personal lifestyles, we can afford to give generously to charities.

In contrast, if we make a comfortable living, the advantages are less visible but nonetheless important. We can participate in a healthy lifestyle because we will be less pressured. A job that pays less may have a slower pace and fewer responsibilities. Less stress may allow us to sleep better.There may be fewer demands on our time so we can exercise more and have more meals at home, contributing to good health. The extra time can also be spent with family members instead of at the office . We can be at the ball game when our child hits the home run.

In making personal decision, i am opting for a comfortable living instead of the high-powered job with a large salary. As the daughter of a successful executive , I remember expensive vacations that my father paid for but did not participate in because he was too busy at work. I prefer to spend time with my children instead of spending money on them. I plan to be at the ball game.
rozha   
Jul 12, 2013
Writing Feedback / Benefit of supermarket and how it affects on small buisness [4]

In conclusion., supermarkets and small shops collectively have a great role in our daily life, government should have such a good plan to protect the large and small businesses in a good economical standard.
rozha   
Jul 12, 2013
Letters / Letter about building a factory in my neighborhood-feedback [4]

I think that it will be better if there is an isolated area specialized in developing the industry so that every company can choose their own place to build such kinds of construction, which will not affect the life of other people.
rozha   
Jul 12, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay-Movies should present positive values. Y or N ? [7]

Good writing, if you mention (movie 2012)...it had really a negative affect on people...,,it was just fiction but it made a great influence on our mind....There is also the topic of horror movies and violent movies make people loose their grip on reality and develop mental health issues and in some cases act out what they see in a movie. This is why some movies get bad publicity and wind up getting banned but the irony is that because its banned and gets bad press more people will want to go and see it therefore establishing a cult fan base if you will.
rozha   
Jul 11, 2013
Writing Feedback / Benefit of supermarket and how it affects on small buisness [4]

rozha
Big stores are also quite dangerous for all small shops owned by people privately. And those shops may be the only source of living of them. Those people that living away from city center it is difficult to shop in daily bases , some of them they do not have a car, so the small shops are very important specially at the edge of the cities and sometime in the city center for instance, the corner shops are useful as most of the time you do not need to use your a car to go around your house to buy a thing or two.
rozha   
Jul 11, 2013
Writing Feedback / Benefit of supermarket and how it affects on small buisness [4]

Nowadays, supermarkets are an integral part of modern-life. The corner shop are being squeezed out of the market by supermarkets and large rivals, shopping become a part of our everyday life, we can fit shopping in to our busy schedules we are not even restricted by opening hours, so many supermarkets now open twenty four hours. The price of a lot of product is very low, and the competition of the supermarkets is very good for customers. It is a very convenient way of shopping because you can choose the product you want form a large range and you have the possibility to get to know the new products. You are served in a very polite way no one makes you hurry and an adjacent car park where you can wheel your trolley to your car. A part from goods you can find there a restaurant ,cafe and , a special place for kids to play while their mothers are shopping. we will not forget that some time there is a sales and specials offers "buy one get one free" ,Beside these advantages of supermarkets it has some disadvantages for example, sometimes we buy unnecessary things, we buy things that we did not plan to buy earlier. This is called impulsive buying. For many of us the major disadvantage of shopping in the supermarkets is that it is time consuming it takes a while to get there and back.

Big stores are also quite dangerous for all small shops owned by private people. And those shops may be the only source of living of them. Those people that living away from cities center it is difficult to do shopping in the supermarkets daily , some of them they do not have car, so the small shops are very important specially at edge of the cities and sometime in the cities center for example , when you are hurry you need a thing you can buy it in a corner shop near your house you do not need to use your car.

In conclusion., supermarkets and small shops both of them have a great role in our daily life, each of us need both of them, government should have such a good plan to protect the large and small businesses in a good economical standard.
rozha   
Jul 11, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Food is now easier to prepare than ever; Specific reasons & examples [7]

Nowadays, with the invention of the microwave and with the popularity of fast food restaurants, food has become easier to prepare than ever. Do you think microwave ovens and fast food restaurants are beneficial to society? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

...Nowadays, because most of people have work and they do not have time to prepare food at home , they depend on fast foods and using microwave, of course both of them have a positive and a negative affect on society . Fast food is an enormous chain of food which is affecting our society and is having a huge impact on our environment, economy other factors.Over the years now fast food has become more and more popular, because it is twice as cheap as any other meal and it is extremely quick. Therefore having a huge impact on society and the way we live. Numerous people are now using fast-food as an excuse because it is an easy way out of cooking and saving money. Whilst recently fast-food has been widely discriminated because we are now aware of the impacts and the factors involved in fast-food, we are now more aware of what impact fast-food has had on our society. more people going out to eat other than making food at home, plus the pollution the trucks are putting out to supply all the fast food chains with the food like the burgers, fries etc. Along with the pollution the restaurant is giving off itself whilst making the food. Health problems are probably one of the most known problems that fast food does to you because in general, fast-food is extremely bad for you, because they basically fry everything and the large amounts of fat and salt added to make it easier to cook all add up. These large amounts of fat and saturated fat can lead to heart attack (cardiac arrest) plus the cholesterol which clogs up your arteries, plus many other diseases like diabetes and Kidney Stones from all the soda which they offer you. This then can lead to more people going off work and larger amounts of money having to be spent on hospitals and health.

No one can deny that the microwave oven helps save time on food preparation. People of all ages are trying to balance their work and personal activities. The home has become a shelter for people to get away from non-end stressful life. In this way, the microwave oven is important because family members can spend less time in the kitchen and more time in the living room. After more than 50 years in use, microwave ovens have held their place on kitchen counter top . The microwave oven helps save time not only for families but also for the fast food and the food service industry. In such a fast-paced world, people require more fast services, instant foods and quick meals. Without the practical role of microwave oven, none of the above could be done. Time, money and energy have been saved, our society is benefiting more and more by the industrial application of microwave ovens. Nowadays, we live in a technological advances world we are surrounded by waves, microwave are a type of energy that is absorbed by the food particles inside an oven, that waves may have a bad affect on human health.

In conclusion, i think that fast food and microwave have play an important role in our life, we will partially depend on them , because their disadvantages will be more than advantages if we depend on them everyday.
rozha   
Jul 4, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS; Paid work for children is good or bad? Discuss [10]

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work children are engaged in some kind of work all over the world especially in the poor countries... ....i think this is better because some time children are engaged in unpaid work.
rozha   
Jul 4, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:Should driving be taught at school? [10]

it is a good writing, but i think learning rules and driving skills at school is a good way to decrease the car accidents , but teaching children how to drive a car is dangerous....i took benefit from your writing...thanx.;)
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / Global water scarcity - a Global concern [2]

Global water scarcity has risen world wide concerned. Natural ecosystems require water for the survival of humans, plants and animals that live with in them. This ecosystems help to regulate water quantity and quality.

As the world population continues to expand peopel are overusing water and destroy many natural resource. Human consume water, poisnous it, waste it , without considering the consquence. Supplying enough water in the right quantity at the right time and in the right place has always been a concern. All of life depend on water. It is as important to life as air, food, and sunlight. For this reason water has always played an important role in civilization through out history. The problem with water is that there is the same amount now as there was in pre-historic times and no way to make any more of it.

The potable fresh water which the human race need is declining, Some try to turn salt water to potable fresh water which is generally known as desalination. This technique is time consuming and expensive we cant depend on it for treatment of global water shortage.There are so many causes such as global warming , cutting down forest, seasonal change, these have great impact on water sacarcity. Our live on the earth depends on water so everyone should concerned about this great natural source of life , and we should decrease consume of water and protect our environment from global warming.

We will concerned abou our future genration , because scarcity of water is the main cause of world war, and may change the life of human in a negative way, and also decline of potable fresh water is the cause of spreading water borne disease such as diarrohea and also is the major cause of poverty such as in Africa .we will try to safe water and protect water from pollution , and also protect underground water.
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / goverment has a plan to plant trees , dose this have affect on ecosystem and water ? [2]

Ecosystem is a complex set of relationships among the living resources, habitats, and residents of an area , it includes plants, trees, birds, fishs, animals, microorganisims, water, soil , and people. Everything that lives in an ecosystem is dependant on the other species and elements that are also part that ecological community . If one part of an ecosystem is damaged or disappears, it has an impact on everything else. trees and water are part of this ecosystem they interact togeather. Each government should encourage people to plant tree making their houses or their cities greener, because plant create oxygen and absorb green house gases and promote a cycle of evaporation and rain fall such as Amazon forest is a best habitat for animal species most of the animals live in the forest ,destruction of trees may, therefore, encourage global warming and increase temperature. Cutting tree can result in loss of habitats for animal species which can harm ecosystems.

finally , because water and tree are parts of that ecosystem both have a great role in making a balance in the ecosystem, if one of them disappears it cause a great harm to that system.So plant of tree is a good way to protect our environment from warming and pollution and it has postive affect on water resources and rainfall beside that makes our cities beautiful.
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Undergraduate / Honestly Hypnotized. Stanford Essay: Intellectual Development. [4]

Children do a great deal of learning between the ages of three and twelve taking them from rather simplistic preschoolers to independent thinkers, capable of understanding complex issues. Learning and intellectual development is a gradual and continuing process, one that hopefully lasts throughout all of life, rather than merely in childhood.

Importan tools of intellectual development are language and communication skills.
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / Imported fruits &vegetables can affect the home grown vegetable market [2]

Economy is crucial for our life, so each country has its own standard for importing and exporting products, it is different from one country to another. Bringing products from outside has great affect on the markets and on the home grown products, this has a negative and postive affects, on one hand , domestic vegetables and fruits in some countries cant supply the great number of people ,so those goverments should put a good system for importing fruits and vegetables from outside, surely this can have an influence on the prize of vegetables and fruits on the markets,and also on the homegrown products .

On another hand , tropical fruit and vegetables have essential commodities in the enternational markets, in some countries these kind of fruits and vegetables can not cultivate because of cold climate in those rea so importing of tropical fruits and vegetables has a great influence on the markets and home grown products, because these tropical products are very desirable people are ready to buy it even if it is expensive, in turn makes the homegrown products to be less desirable and decline its prize. Nowdays , most of people live in the urban area and are busy with their works a small number of people live in the rural area and working as farmer, goverments should encourage farmer to harvest their products and put a good economical system between importing and exporting fruit and vegetables from outside.

Finally, i believe that organic farming and products are better than those vegetables and fruit that importing and growing by chemical fertilizer in a short time just for trading , and also some time lost their nutritional content because they remain for a long time till they reach the place of useand aslo they may cause the spread of epedemic disease .each goverment should encourage their farmers for cultivate fruits and vegetables,and allocate a budget for that. and protect the prize of domestic product on a stable level.
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Scholarship / No community service work course; SCHOLARSHIP/ Proposed study [6]

did you mention the enfluence of international student on Australia??? i cant understand well from this subject...it is obscured :( for me ...if you write again clearly in an easy language it is better...in my view it is very complex .:(
rozha   
Jun 27, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOURISM and its IMPACT on our society [7]

thank you....i searched for essay about tourism and but i couldnt find it, so i decided to write about it....hhhh ..thank u...(enviroNment) i always forget that N.
rozha   
Jun 26, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOURISM and its IMPACT on our society [7]

One of the most essential things for toursim to be successful in a particular place is a quality of the enviroment both natural and man-made.However tourism involves many activities that have a negative effect on the enviroment.These occur when the level of usage is bigger than the amount of caring for the enviroment.Uncontrolled tourism is threatening many natural area around the world.it can put great pressure on an area,and lead to negative enviromental impacts on air and water quality,vegetation,soil,wild life,and many other thing.

One of the most important areas of tourism is transportation.transport by air , road, rail is rising steadily because of increase in the number of tourists.One consquences of this is that tourism is responsible for a large amount of air transmissions.these emissions, as well as those from the production electricity,another important tourist need, are linked to acid rain, chemical pollution and global warming.They contribute to severe air pollution,not only in cities but in natural enviroment as well.Some of these impacts are directly related to tourism.For example, in very hot or cold conditions,Tour buses often leave their motor running while the tourists go out on excursions so that the bus is at comfortable temperature when they return.

Another negative effect of tourism is water quality.Bushwalker can damage small streams by walking through them too many times,causing them to be muddy which then in turn makes it difficult for small fish to feed.Also, less experienced bushwalkers some times like to pursue activities such as washing their hair in small creeks and streams, sending chemical in shampoo and conditioner downstream and further damaging to the enviroment.

However, not all effects of tourism are long term. The most common impact of tourism is litter, and its effect is almost instant. Litter is a serious problem in areas with high concentrations of tourist activities and natural attractions. It can have a major negative impact on all areas of the natural environment .

Tourist destinations in the mountains often end up with a great deal of unwanted waste. Tourists on expeditions leave behind garbage, oxygen cylinders and camping equipment. In the less developed or remote areas this is even worse as there are few disposal facilities. Some of the more frequently visited mountain trails in the Andes and in Nepal have been nick-named by the locals things such as "Coca-Cola Trail" and "Toilet Paper Trail", and the Inca Trail in Peru is often referred to as the "Stinker Trail" as a result of all the rubbish that tourists leave behind.

This has a bad effect on not only the appeal of a tourist site but the plant and animal life in the area as well. Natural tourist sites need distinct pathways and signposts so as to minimise the impact on vegetation. Destroying plants is also destroying many homes and habitats of the fauna in that particular area. This can eventually lead to the loss of biodiversity.

Constant trampling of natural habitats has a negative impact on vegetation, animals, and soil as well. Large amounts of trampling on soil causes loss of organic matter, and also accelerates erosion in that area. In beaches all over the world, especially the more popular ones such as those in Hawaii, the erosion is so bad that sand has to brought in to keep the beach attractive and viable. Once again, clear signs and distinct paths are needed to minimise this impact.

Tourism has many destructive environmental effects. However, it also has some positive impacts. Tourism contributes to environmental protection and conservation by raising people's awareness of environmental values. Tourists often travel to a destination because of its quality and purity. Many of these tourists both directly and indirectly cause pollution to these places, making them unappealing to other tourists. However, the next stage in the cycle is employing local people to help clean it up, making their lives slightly easier and more comfortable. It is only when the gap between these stages gets too large that it becomes a real problem, but with good planning and having everything in moderation, this may not happen any more.

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