Writing Feedback / The optimum rate of elephants living in most Asian countries decreased between 1997 and 2004 [2]

A breakdown of the information about the alterations in maximum number of Asian elephants for a seven-year period, started in 1997 measured in thousand is described in the given bar chart. Overall, it can be seen that the optimum rate of elephants living in most Asian countries decreased between 1997 and 2004. India had the highest number of Asian elephant.

To begin, the elephant population which lives in India broke the record as the highest one in both years. It was followed by Myanmar. In the former year, the elephant population living in Thailand reached around 4000 and experienced a dramatic drop in the latter year by roughly 3000. It also happened in Malaysia which witnessed a remarkable decline by approximately 2000.

Although the trends was downward in most countries, the population of elephant in Vietnam and Laos remained stable at around 1100. The only country that showed the increment for the number of elephant population was Cambodia, where it rose by roughly 100. Other proportions were only a small proportion.

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Writing Feedback / Article Summary : The Sweet scent of plastic lures seabirds to a dangerous snack [2]

Recently, the plastic pollution fouls oceans across the globe. There are more than 5 trillion pieces of plastic swirling in the sea and make the fish poisoned dead. The marine creatures sometimes mistake garbage for their natural food. Plastic resembles a drifting jellyfish to marine creatures. Some seabirds are attracted to a particular stinky sulphur compound since they seek out krill to eat. Savoca and his colleagues wondered if small plastic left in the ocean, it might become covered with sulphur that are produced by algae. He proved it when he put some plastic and left them until three weeks. The result is the plastics are covered with sulphur compound let them has the same scent as the krill. This lead seabirds which seek out the food using their smelling skill to eat trash instead of krill.

Source : newscientist.com/article/2112231-the-sweet-scent-of-plastic-lures-seabirds-to-a-dangerous-snack/

Writing Feedback / Students need to be seen and feel like they are valued. [2]

TED Summary : Every Kid need a champion - Rita Pierson

Nowadays, the value of human connection is rarely discussed by educators. The significant relationship between the educators and the student is the key to guide student reaching their potential. The teacher can become a good actors and actresses in changing students from nobody into somebody by leaving a legacy of relationship that could never disappear. Even though there are many students who have a bad behaviour and influence the teaching value, but actually, the students need to be seen and feel like they are valued. Educators can become a champion to every child and create a wonderful world which have the students who not afraid to take a risk.

Writing Feedback / Writing Task 1 : The Elder Population in Three different countries [4]

A breakdown of the information about the proportion of elderly people in three different developed countries for a 100-year period, started in 1940 is described in the given line graph. Overall, it can be seen that the number of elderly inhabitant in those countries has the similar upward trend and it is predicted to increase with the same pattern in the future.

To begin, by 1940, USA and Sweden had higher proportion of older people living there at around 10% and 7% respectively and grew gradually in the next following decades. In contrast, Japanese elderly inhabitant had remain below one a fifth and kept unchanged for several years.

In 1990, the aging people in two countries experienced a slight drop while Japan started to show an increase in elder inhabitant. Furthermore, in 2040, it is forecasted that Japan's elderly population will grow significantly and hit a peak nearly five times higher than the first time of the period. This projection places Japan in the highest position in the elderly citizen ratio and is followed by Sweden and USA.

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Writing Feedback / The number of people visiting the music choice and the pop parade sites [2]

A breakdown of the information about the comparison between two kinds of new music sites visitor in a fifteen-day period measured in thousand is illustrated in the line graph. Overall, it can be seen that both figures has similar upward trend. Also, the pop parade music are more popular than the music choice.

To begin, initially, the number of people visiting the music choice and the pop parade sites start at approximately 40 and 120 thousands respectively. In the next following day, the former experiences a significant incline and is followed by a stable fluctuation. Meanwhile, the latter shows a gradual decline in the total of visitors of the music sites by 80,000s in the ninth day.

A part from previous comparison, the remarkable changes can be seen in the twelfth and thirteenth day when the number of music choice site visitors overtakes the other. However, the number of people visiting the pop parade site reaches a peak at over 160,000s. Eventually, In any case the music choice site visitor is directly below the highest by more or less 80,000s.

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Writing Feedback / Over 200 million people are suffering from Malaria, the disease caused by mosquitos; TED summary [2]

Over the past century, the average of lifespan has more than doubled. In contrast, another statistic shows the comparison of the childhood death rate in 1960 and 2004. In 1960, 110 million children were born and 20 million of those died before the age five. Meanwhile in 2004, 135 million children were born and less than 10 million of them also died before they reach 5 year old. The causes of these death, mostly, are Diarrhoea, Pneumonia and Malaria.

Over 200 million people are suffering from Malaria, the disease caused by mosquitos, at any one time. To get rid of this disease involves many things. It involves communicators, social scientists, drug companies and rich-world governments so that we will be able to eradicate malaria. Having those elements is hard, there are another way to eradicate the diseases. Educating teacher with a good education and improve teacher some skills and these two things can make differences for millions of lives, if people get it right.

In brief, taking brilliant people to study these things and getting other people involved, the solutions will come up.

Writing Feedback / Article Summary : The Causes of Acne [3]

A full-spotty break out, known as the acne, happens when the bacteria adheres to our face. The researcher from the University of California, San Diego, Richard Gallo and his colleagues have discovered a harmless bacterium living on the surface of people skin can turn into acne, triggering inflammation and zits.

The acne bacterial, Propionibacterium acnes, living in the airless environment turns into fatty acids that activate inflammation in nearby skin cells and deactivate histone deacetylases, enzyme that act as a brake on inflammation. Scrubbing our face will make the bacteria clump together form new structure called biofilms making the bacteria going deeper.

According to Gallo, people who seem more prone to acne have suffocating hair follicles. Teenagers, according to Bruggemann, are most defenceless against outbreak because of their sex hormone driving the production of extra sebum in the skin during puberty.

Gallo wants to inhibit the fatty acid and block their impact on skin. In two to five years Gallo will do further works to find new mediations for these problem.

Writing Feedback / The plane contributes to pollute the atmosphere because it uses the fossil fuel [2]

Restricting air travel is the only way to prevent the air pollution. Do you agree or disagree?

The air pollution, nowadays, become the predominant problem faced by the world. Some people thinking that the only way to prevent air pollution is limiting the use of the air travel. Personally, I believe that restricting the air travel is not the only approach to reduce the air pollution.

The air travel, recently becomes a popular transportation people had chosen regarding to the easiness and the cost of the air travel. The increment of using air plane will increase the air pollution. The plane contributes to pollute the atmosphere because it uses the fossil fuel. Reducing the use of air travel can be the way to prevent the increment of the air pollution.

However, restricting the air travel is not the only way to prevent the air pollution. There are abundant factors causing the pollution to the atmosphere such as vehicles and industries. Vehicles and industries are the common factors which has a big contribution in polluting the air. The emission from vehicles using fossil fuel give massive pollutant to the air, they consist of CO2 and CO, causing global warming. The government needs to reduce the use of the vehicles by designing a firm policy in order to preclude the air pollution worsen. Cycling to work once a week, for an example, can reduce the air pollution. The industries also become a big contributors in polluting the air. Nearly all industries are throwing their waste to the atmosphere. It increases the air pollution time-to-time. Taking tire industry for an example, they use coal as their fuel, while some industries use fossil fuel, the burnt coal produce CO2 and CO which can damage the air pollution. Planting some trees can also enrich the oxygen level at the atmosphere reducing the air pollution.

All in all, precluding the air pollution can be done not only by limiting the air travel. Government take a big role to designing the policy that can reduce the use of vehicles and a stringent rule for industries to reducing their waste. Individuals can also keep the air from pollution by not burning their rubbish. There are so many steps we can take to make the air more clear.

Writing Feedback / This essay will examine the motives why people commit a crime and discuss some possible solutions [2]

Topic :
Each year, the crime rate increases.
What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

The predominant problem the world face these day is the gradual increment of the crime rate. Several factors become the excuse why the delinquency rate increases. This essay will examine the motives why people commit a crime and discuss some possible solutions to tackle the rise in criminal activity.

The main causes that lead people commit a crime, mostly, because of their social environment and the people they associate with. The social environment, especially the environment they grew up in, take a big role in influencing a person to do criminal activities. Taking the youngsters in Argentina as an example, the Argentina youngsters are growing up surrounded by people doing vice activities will drift them into major delinquencies such as using drugs and violent crimes. The poverty also becomes the chief cause of criminal activities. The poverty in Indonesia, for instance, which increases time-to-time makes the poor do illegal activities such as pickpocketing, fraud, and robbery in order to fulfil their daily urges. Ultimately, the reason people commit a crimes is likely a combination of many different individual situations.

Nevertheless, there are several ways to prevent the increment of the crime rate, or at least reduce its probability. Firstly, the government need to reduce the poverty by giving a proper education to the poor for free. A good education will give them a chance to get a proper job or at least with a better education they can open their own vacancy. Providing more jobs will also reduce the possibility of the criminality. Designing a strict rule in a bad environment, giving severe punishment such as imprison them who commit more serious criminal offences, and intensifying the secure in some places can also prevent the criminal activities.

To conclude, even though many different factors influence people to commit crimes but both governments and individuals can take many steps to combat crimes. If governments and individuals cooperate each other, the increment of the crime rate can be prevented.

Writing Feedback / Smart camera system checks patients' vital signs from afar [4]

Oxehealth, accompany spun out from the University of Oxford, created a medical device software that can measure heart rate, respiration and blood oxygenation from a distance using camera data. This software has been installed and is being tested at Oxford's main teaching hospital, the John Radcliffe. They asked patients who need an intensive care after surgery to participate in the trial where oxehealth's cameras will monitor their vital signs in parallel with sensors. This software has also been running at London's Metropolitan Police Service and Broadmoor high-security psychiatric hospital in order to make sur someone is safe when they are in a secure room.

This software watches the small changes in video frames as patient breath, for instance. It also tracks subtle changes the colour of patient skin using that to infer patient's pulse. The advantage of The Oxehealth software may come after patients are discharge because both doctors and patients their selves can monitor the illness from home.

Writing Feedback / An extraordinary capacity of creativity can be obtained by having a willing to be wrong [2]

TED sumary Do schools kill creativity? - Sir Ken Robinson

Creativity, recently, is as important in education as literacy. Every child has extraordinary capacity of creativity that can be obtained by having a will to be wrong. It does not mean that being wrong is the same thing as being creative. However, nearly all the schools, nowadays, teach the children how to be good at some subjects such as mathematics and science, not on art. This bears hierarchy in education systems and mainly because the education system was developed to fulfil job and industry demand. But, jobs now need not only high education or intelligence but also creativity.

Based on Ken, there are 3 things people know about intelligence. Firstly, intelligence is diverse, it means that people think in many different ways - in sound, movement, visually. The second is dynamic, intelligence is amazingly interactive. From the interactive brain, original idea comes and leads to the creativity. The third is distinct, it means that people have their own way to do some activities.

Ken recommends people to use their not only intelligences but also imaginations and creativities wisely to face uncertain problems in the future. People should rethink the fundamental principles in educating creativity to the children.

Writing Feedback / Learn Culture from its Language which is the utmost important instrument to communicate with people [2]

Some people think that person can never understand the culture of a country unless they speak the language.
Do you agree with this opinion?

Languages are the important tool to communicate with other people around the world. Some people regard the languages as the only way to understand the culture of a country. There are several reasons why I believe that knowing how people speak in their language is not the predominant way to understand the culture of the nations.

There is no doubt that language is the utmost important instrument to communicate with people. In fact, language, as the identity of country as well as culture, becomes reflection of the culture itself. People can deducing the culture of a nation by comprehending their language. Taking Javanese culture, one of the Indonesian cultures, as an example, the majority Javanese speak calmly and slowly. It can be expected that they have polite and friendly culture. Different to people living in Medan, a city at North Sumatera, they speak much louder than Javanese people and more impolite. It can be indicated that they have strong personality and though culture.

However, there are also another way to apprehend a country culture such as learning their customs or their behaviours. For instance, some Hindi people usually pour milk to their statue, which regards as their God. It reflects that they respect their God with the best material from their environment.

In brief, even though some people have mind-set that speak other country language is the only way to understand the culture of a country, but learning from not only its language but also its customs and behaviours are the best way to comprehend the culture of a nation.