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"lust for knowledge" - FSU admissions essay

7 - No, the connection with Vires is not at all clear....

Undergraduateryanthelion - Aug 26, 2009EF_Simone - Aug 27, 2009
UCB Transfer Hopeful

7 - EF_Simone: Thank you so much for your feedback! I tried to incorporate that tidbit as such: When...

Undergraduatetwofer - Aug 26, 2009twofer - Aug 27, 2009
UCF Admissions Essay - Which topic does my essay suit best?

6 - Any more suggestions from anyone?...

UndergraduateMieMie09 - Aug 26, 2009MieMie09 - Aug 27, 2009
help pick my essay topic (applying to art colleges)

10 - haha yea i guess i'm ok with cartoons, still developing my style though x_x. nah that's a good amount...

Undergraduateautumnclouds67 - Aug 25, 2009autumnclouds67 - Aug 27, 2009
it is important to find out if the decision will be popular with others (IBT)

5 - Your grammar and word choice are generally correct, so you are in good shape for taking the TOEFL. ...

Writing Feedbacktuanlnc - Aug 26, 2009EF_Simone - Aug 27, 2009
Celebrating Nerdiness - Tom Rogers

8 - Don't ask me what's in the article. Read the article yourself. What does your teacher want? A summary...

Essaystempestuous - Aug 26, 2009EF_Simone - Aug 27, 2009
Should we tell the truth always in order to preserve our friendship?

8 - First, you must register an account on this site. Then, On the right-top corner, there is the "New Thread"...

Writing Feedback123toilama - Aug 26, 2009tuanlnc - Aug 27, 2009
Admission essay - Grandfather

7 - I love this essay. I think it was creative to use someone who you never met before. You don't...

Undergraduatedcqqqq - Aug 23, 2009MieMie09 - Aug 27, 2009
GRE: Corporate executives' responsibility

4 - Thanks Sean and Simone for those invaluable suggestions....

Writing FeedbackJunYuan - Aug 26, 2009JunYuan - Aug 27, 2009
"the League of Nations after World War 1" -Stanford Intellectual Vitality essay

7 - get people to look at it please lol i need a better rewrite by tomorrow at 12 =P...

Undergraduatethegerman - Aug 26, 2009thegerman - Aug 26, 2009
Money or Health

10 - wow, you are more more better than me. Thank for your paragraph it help me to improve my essay...

Undergraduatejeffrey L - Aug 25, 2009jeffrey L - Aug 26, 2009
traditional foods vs international fast food (which is bad)

6 - Yes, one only has two hands. So, one can only say, "on the other hand" once....

Writing FeedbackEricc - Aug 15, 2009EF_Simone - Aug 26, 2009
'like a zombie' - Standord intellectual engaging supplement essay

14 - So should I modify the last paragraph so as to make the parallel more apparent, or just leave it...

Undergraduateeternal flame - Aug 24, 2009eternal flame - Aug 26, 2009
RISD SHORT ESSAY

16 - Hi, I am so new Anyway I read your essay. It's okay maybe your real experience could help....

Undergraduatebenz - Aug 24, 2009h Y - Aug 26, 2009
single parent home - Proofread, suggestions-MSU Personal statement

3 - This is great advide,and exactly what I was looking for. THANK YOU!...

UndergraduateMG4192 - Aug 26, 2009MG4192 - Aug 26, 2009
'Everyone was burned to crisp' - "Jacob" - grammar for my Essay?

4 - This part is confusing to me. You should state that Jacob insisted on quitting school first. Otherwise, there...

Writing FeedbackSPak - Aug 26, 2009Llamapoop123 - Aug 26, 2009
[toefl] topic (dis/agree) There are times when lying is acceptable.

4 - I think lying for good purposes is not only acceptable but also necessary. White lies are sometimes very useful....

Writing Feedbacksugarzhi - Aug 26, 2009tuanlnc - Aug 26, 2009
'Summer camp days' - Stanford letter to roomate

8 - hmmm... its relaxed and humorous, i like it but check others out... it seems like there more detailed but...

Undergraduateselter01 - Aug 22, 2009thegerman - Aug 26, 2009
Why I chose to apply to UCF? (my journey to success)

21 - If there really isn't anything about the essay that is well written or if there isn't any good points...

UndergraduateMieMie09 - Aug 25, 2009Llamapoop123 - Aug 26, 2009
Old saying; 'experience is the best teacher' -Review for CLEP

11 - Should be an "are" here because of the word "and". ____________________________________________________________ _______________________ I would suggest including...

Writing Feedbacktg2009 - Aug 12, 2009JunYuan - Aug 26, 2009
(A cheating incident I was involved in) is essay topic is OK?

9 - ^People's decisions are influenced by other activities, surrounding them, that occurred in the past, or can possibly happen...

UndergraduatePhoenix1300 - Aug 25, 2009Liebe - Aug 26, 2009
"horrible accident" - UC Undergraduate Admission TRANSFER PROMPT 2

13 - The tone is *much* better! You need to watch your verb tense. You are jumping around from present...

Undergraduatevuko323 - Aug 22, 2009Notoman - Aug 26, 2009
Non-traditional Student College Personal Essay

6 - Thank you so much for the tips. This was the first draft which popped in my head. I know...

Writing FeedbackSFLady77 - Aug 25, 2009SFLady77 - Aug 25, 2009
Moral and ethical standards and effective leadership--GRE issue

3 - Why do you mention business leaders? The prompt specifically asks you to discuss public officials. I think you...

Writing FeedbackSuperkid - Aug 24, 2009EF_Sean - Aug 25, 2009
princeton summer- I practiced soccer with my cousins

4 - What is your thesis? That is, what main point do you want the essay to make about you, that...

Writing Feedbackladidi - Aug 25, 2009EF_Sean - Aug 25, 2009
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world"; Community Problem Solving

7 - Yes, we can, inasmuch as we have the ability to do so. To the question you probably meant to...

UndergraduateCjacobs17 - Aug 21, 2009EF_Sean - Aug 25, 2009
Appearance and society values--An GRE issue

9 - Tell us what you mean by that. I'm also curious about your insights on differences in thinking patterns....

Writing Feedbacktsp8487 - Aug 23, 2009EF_Simone - Aug 25, 2009
"I eat fish" common app + uc app essay

8 - Your writing is very descriptive and really paints a vivid picture. The reader will feel a part of the...

Undergraduatemnkmnkz16 - Aug 24, 2009MieMie09 - Aug 25, 2009
Benefits and drawbacks of urbanization. Better life for older in the countryside

8 - You should focus on the vocabs like simone said...

Writing FeedbackJino - Aug 4, 2009HarryK - Aug 25, 2009
GRE: Knowledge and Rejection of Authority

5 - Thanks Notoman for aiding me with my English. Thanks Sean for correcting my inaccuracies and also giving me...

Writing FeedbackJunYuan - Aug 23, 2009JunYuan - Aug 25, 2009
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