Writing Feedback / [writing task 1] The graph below shows the polulation of Chile by age group between 1975 and 2035. [2]

The writer will recieve a preliminary failing GRA score for the summary overview. It is confusing and represents a true - blue run-on sentence. This presentation should be composed of at least 3 individual sentence presentations. This current type of presentation is definitely a score-down right at the very start of the scoring process.

Essays of these sort must be brief and concise to fit in the 20 minute time provision. The writer did not meet that requirement. He has over- written the essay for no reason. Leaving him open to more score deductions due to his failure to double check his work for clarity, conciseness, and other scoring needs. Case in point, he makes a trending point / reference twice, in different paragraphs.That is only done once.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2 Online meetings or offline meetings for teenagers? [2]

Social media interaction is a passive activity.The writer was in evor when referring to this as "encourage activeness of teenagers". No such encouragement is provided by the activity. The writer will lose points for an erroneous discussion that was created by a single word choice error. Word choice matters. It can help increase or decrease a score. The writer must improve his vocabulary knowledge to avoid similar future errors.

The with could have used one or two well developed explanations to encourage face to face meetings. The writer got lazy and opted to little explain his solutions. These are not acceptable as developed suggestions because of the lack of cohesiveness and coherence in the paragraph.

Writing Feedback / The charts below show the results of a questionnaire that asked visitors to the Parkway Hotel [2]

The writer needs to provide a more specific image identification to help fulfill the summary requirement. The type and number of images are important to the presentation. The summary should offer data highlights and image identification is an integral part of that. There is also a lack of data basis for the comments. What were the y sections? The trend is confusing to read without that run-down.

Analysis paragraphs are not completely provided. The minimum sentence requirement is 3, the provided analysis are always 2 run- on sentences. There is confusion in the presentation because of the compressed and hurried presentation. The writer must take the time to write a relaxed analysis to create a reasoned analysis basis.

Letters / Ambition and Persistence. Motivational Letter for MSc in AI & Machine Learning for ERASMUS MUNDUS [2]

A motivational letter is just that, a 5 paragraph summary of why you are interested in applying for the scholarship. It should not bea 3 page writing exercise such as this one. It is definitely too long and runs the chance of not being read by the reviewer. He might read one, two, or 3 paragraphs, but he will not read it to the very end. He won't have the time to do so. The result? Your application might be passed on because it was over informative. Keep it short, relevant, and interesting to the reader. This letter does not meet that qualification.

Focus only on the following:
- Pertinent personal and academic data
- Relevant reason/motivation of your application. What you hope to gain by becoming an EM scholar
- A strong conclusion

This essay is mixed up and rambling on. Try to use the info above to gain more focus and control of the content.

Writing Feedback / Task 2: outdoor activities benefit more than computer games [3]

The writer is not being asked to give an opinion about the topic. There was no need to cite a truth that altered the discussion topic/ target. He must not make unnecessary references in the restatement as that action alters the restatement by offering an unexpected opinion.

The writer has a strong supporting assessment of the topic provided. Therefore, 2 supporting reason paragraphs must be used to prove his point in the witten debate. Indicate a perceived benefit of video games. Explain the benefit as the supporters all it. . Then, in the same paragraph, tear down the topic in support of your reason. strongly oppose it with valid reasons. That is how one recieves a high score with this prompt.

In this case, only the paragraph related to the opinion is scorable. It will not be enough to overcome the scoring problems to recieve a passing score.

Writing Feedback / The bar chart shows the proportion of British people who give money to charity in five age groups [2]

The writer wrote the report based on active timeline presentation. This means the activities are ongoing. However, the image represents previously completed contribution schedules.The essay will fail on G R A mistakes alone. The writer must become familiar with tense usage if he is to improve his GRA score. Additionally the writer shows a limited sentence structure range. Consider not writing run-on sentences next time. Use individual sentences for data presentation instead. It helps with the C + C score. Also, vary the presentation by using other punctuation marks to show an advanced writing skill.

The writer understands what the image is about and what data should be presented. However, his limited writing skills fail to show a passing potential.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 - SHORTER WORKING HOURS [2]

The prompt paraphrase is incomplete. It must reference the original 35 hours work week consideration as originally mentioned in the prompt. A clear topic reference in relation to the discussion basis must be provided to create the thesis statement for the A/ D reference. At least one topic each should be mentioned regardless of the accompanying topic in the individual reasoning paragraphs. The prompt paraphrase can expect a weak starting score.

The writer presented an incomplete discussion as it only focuses on the advantages. This is an advantage/ disadvantage discussion so the format should be:

Reasoning paragraph 1: 2 related advantages in a coherent and cohesive paragraph .
Reasoning paragraph 2: 2 related disadvantages of the connected kind.

This is just a comparison essay. There is no personal opinion requirement. Points will be deducted because the writer added an relevant . discussion point in the summary conclusion paragraph.The essay can fail as there is no proper conclusion presented.

Writing Feedback / Topic: outdoor activites and children [2]

The writer did a good job of offering a prompt restatement and question response. The reasoning is also based on well-known public knowledge. Both paragraphs present solid supporting reasons in relation to the writer's opinion. It stayed focus on a single opinion defense which shows that the Writer understood the discussion and format requirements of the question in the presentation. These are the well scoring parts and considerations of the essay. Now for the problematic part.

The writer has vocabulary issues as he uses words in a manner that betrays its meaning:

fan- noun, any device for producing a current of air by the movement of a broad surface or a number of such surfaces.
fun- noun, enjoyment or playfulness

newborns - babies, recently or only just born. They do not have the capacity to playin any way or form yet.

The writer needs to understand the homonym differences and also, work on his vocabulary meaning /skills. The term "etc. " is not advised for use in formal and academic writing as it a shortcut reference for "and so on and so forth". Simply end the sentence with a period instead.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing task 2 | Topic: Culture and cultural identity | Words: 275 [2]

The writer provided general discussion points in each paragraph. The assumption will now be that the writer did not provide a comparative analysis of the public opinion based on public perception. There are no proper pronouns used to indicate the difference between the writers opinion and the public oultook. This was further reinforced by the lack of personal opinion paragraph presentation in the essay. Had the writer provided an actual personal opinion paragraph in the presentation, the repetition of it in the concluding summary would have been acceptable. Without that paragraph, the essay is deemed incomplete in discussion considerations and without proper group for presentation. The writer must strive to present opinion clarity through the use of proper reference words to achieve response format compliance.

Writing Feedback / Thee days the communication between people has been revolutionised by technology [2]

The way relationships have been changed could have been more properly addressed by the writer had he avoided 2 irrelevant discussion points:
- electronic commerce
- online learning in relation to foreign teachers.

Both do not classify as social relationships as the former is all about business and the latter, is related to educator - student relationships. Only the last, and sadly, undeveloped reason qualified as a related topic response.

As this is not a weighted benefit /drawbacks essay, the writer used an incorrect response to the question provided. The response basis should not weigh positives and downsides. Rather, it must provide a direct response as " This is a positive development" as a method of question related response.

Writing Feedback / Writing task 2: students have the right to university education [2]

The prompt paraphrase was near perfect but, the question response was incorrect. The student altered the discussion concept and expected response. That will educe the score for this section.

Question: To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Response: While there is no denying the benefits, I disagree with this idea because it takes a heavy toll on individuals and society.

The response is not based on a consideration of the degree of agreement or disagreement. The student chose to use a comparative response and comparative reasoning presentation. The actual response and supporting paragraphs should have been based on a single opinion justification. Nowhere in this presentation was that presentation requirement met. This type of presentation is in the running for a failing score.

Writing Feedback / The proportion of male and female in an Asian country who got the driver license from 1980 to 2010 [2]

The trending statement would have been more / completely informative if it had "included the measurement trend as well:

" Overall, the decade on decade trend was upward... "

Since there were measurement gaps in terms of years, it is necessary to inform the reader of the trending measurement basis.

The writer has shown a lack of sentence formation and vocabulary control throughout the presentation. The spelling errors cannot be ignored because the LR and GRA scores will be severely reduced by the mistakes. Surely the student is practicing and word document program that provides a spellchecker. The student should use it for scanning the essay for spelling and presentation errors. That will act as an additional English lesson for the learner.

Writing Feedback / Consumption of 6 different kinds of energy in USA [2]

Writing the summary report is not a marathon. A summary is defined as," a comprehensive and usually brief abstract, recapitulation, or compendium of previously stated facts or statements." That is why it has to be brief and concise. It should not rival a task 2 essay in length. stay within 200 words. The summary overview would have been a good place to start in reference to concise but accurate summarization. This portion of the essay is where the writer should have used 3-5 short sentences to highlight important parts of the image presentation. The run-on presentation prevents the writer from insecting clarification pauses in the paragraph that would have allowed the reader to better comprehend the short version of the report.

The last paragraph kicks off with a confusing reference due to incorrect word usage:


...consumption of fuel by the...

Do not try to use too many words in a task 1 presentation. Keep it simple and do not write more than 200 words to allow for editing and revising within 20 minutes. In truth, the writer wrote a good report in the 3rd paragraph. It was just the right length and word count.

Student Talk / Italy student visa cover letter [2]

Visa cover letter requirements vary from country to country. The specifics are part of the student visa application packets. The standard information though, pertains to the student's ability to study abroad without having to work and, proof of ties to your home country. The idea, is to convince the visa officer that all you will do is study, with a strong desire to return home after completing the degree. Ties to home are best proven through your parent's ability to support your overseas education and work opportunities at home. A familiaritywith the rules governing your stay as a student will also help.

* Please contact me privately to inquire about sample letter services.

Writing Feedback / The given map illustrate the redevelopment process of the island and their facilities. [2]

Let me start by saying that the with does not do a very good job of explaining himself in English. The sentence presentations show a weakness when it comes to using accurate descriptive words. This may be due to a severe lack of English vocabulary on the whilein part. The writer cannot control his sentence formation properly. He cannot form proper simple sentences. He must do more sentence exercises and grow his English vocabulary to overcome these problems. These are actually the main reasons that this essay will fail.

The task 1 essay does not need a concluding summary. Such a presentation only exists for task 2 essays.

Writing Feedback / The bar chart shows the number of cars per 1000 people in 5 European countries in 3 years. [2]

The summary overview does not present a clear restatement. Since the writer did not upload the image , I am limited in presenting a solution to this problem. All I can say is that the reader will definitely feel confusion and irritation after several assessment readings of this line. The GRA score will be non-passing in this instance. The writer must make more of an effort to write comprehensive sentences by separating the sentence information.

Information basis appears to be questionable. The writer mentions Europe in the essay but then uses numerical ordinances for the other countries. Again,the writer did not succeed in creating a mental picture of the image for the reader. The essay writer needs to learn how the create a descriptive report essay. Unfortunately, I can advise on how to accomplish that due to the lack of image.

Writing Feedback / Over the past few decades, the world has been morphing into the era of globalisation [2]

In the restatement paragraph, the original words trade and communication were not replaced by the writer. Synonyms should have been used ( e.g. trade= business, communication = correspondence) to show some vocabulary range. In the opinion presentation, there is no need to specify, "and this essay will elaborate the aforementioned idea." since that is already known to the reader. Only an opinion sentence should be found in that paragraph.

If using a comparative discussion, the 2 paragraphs should use the following format:

Sentence 1 - Topic representing a benefit
Sentence 2 - Reason it is believed to be a benefit
Sentence 3 - Reason it is a drawback
Sentence 4 - Example of the drawback
Sentence 5 - Additional explanation or transition to next paragraph.

The idea is to disprove the benefits to prove the writer's opinion as correct both times.

Writing Feedback / The graph details the proportion of Internet users in three different nations from 1999 to 2009 [2]

In the summary overview, the writer mistakenly used a comma instead of a period whe presenting his trending sentence. This created a clear grammatical eror in the form of a run-on sentence. This will result in a GRA score reduction. Remember, form one idea per sentence to avoid GRA and C + C problems.

Although there are some imperfect sentence presentations, these did not deter the writer from creating clear reports. There is no need for repeated readings of the paragraph to understand the content. There was an efficient data restatement. The analysis is also well developed and presented. This essay will get more than just the average passing score.

Writing Feedback / Wheat Exports from 1985 to 1990 (in million tonnes) [2]

The writer has used a Task 2 under-word count for a Task 1 essay. There should only be 200 words present in this essay. That count is representative of a 20 minute writing allowance. He must use a timer next time and, there is a need for him to learn how to write driect reports. indicative of image data. References to a personal opinion such as " It seems" must not be used in this report because personal opinions are not a requirement for this type of writing. The analysis references must use general comparison methods instead. The summary needs to cite the years of measurement to complete the overview data. The writer must focus on clear content rather unnecessary sentence and paragraph lengthening.

Writing Feedback / Ielts Writing Task 2: Whether people should possess a home or rent one [2]

The essay will immediately start with a failing score. While the topic paraphrase is related to the original one, the writer provided an unrelated response to the 2 direct questions as can be seen below:

Questions: WHY MIGHT THIS BE THE CASE? IS THIS A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?
Response: It is, however, pivotal to have their own ones in several countries.

The writer did not present a response in the expected format. Rather than providing discussion reasons, a personal opinion was stated instead. This is a prompt deviation that will result in a failed TA score. There is no recovering to a passing score when the interpretation and response presentation is deemed incorrect and given a corresponding score.

The writer chose to use a comparison discussion in the body of paragraphs. This is another clear failure on the part of the writer. He has shown an inability to respond in the indicated format (single opinion). He cannot be awarded a passing score.

The writer finally decided to present a related response in the conclusion, but the essay will still fail for 2 reasons:
- No clear opinion provided. This is not a comparison essay
- No proper concluding summary is provided. The opinion is part of the reasoning paragraphs, never the concluding summary.

Writing Feedback / The amount of money which was earned by three different products over three years, starting in 2000 [2]

The writer neglected to give a complete rundown of the chart items in the summary presentation. There is also a hyper-focus on CD sales in the presentation. This caused an inefficient comparison and analysis presentation of the remaining 2 items.

The topic of the graph is also improperly presented. The review says the image relates to amount earned, but the graph clearly says the images present figures in relation to the change in global sales of the 3 items. The task is now an inaccurate report. It is now providing incorrect data representation. That error can lead to a failing TA score related to restatement inaccuracy.

Writing Feedback / Young people work or take long journeys between graduating from high school and entering tertiary [2]

Overwriting an essay is just as bad as underwriting one. When an essay is overwritten , in terms of word count during practice, it stands to reason that the writer will fail to meet the 40 minute writing limit during the actual test. There is a suggested 300 word limit for the discussion precisely because of time considerations.

The tendency ofa wordy essay is to be discussion filler focused rather than concise content presentations. The current essay proves this as the first 2 sentences of each paragraph presented are not topic sentences but sentence fillers. While the writer makes strong presentations, he takes too long to get to the point. Remember the time limit at all times. This mistake affects the C + C and GRA scores of the essay.

Writing Feedback / Choosing university or a job straight after school? [2]

The writer was not informed of the repercussions connected with writing an essay comprised of less than 250 words. A significant portion of the TA score will recieve preliminary scoring deductions before other scoring considerations are reviewed. The percentage of deductions are quite notable since such an error will almost assure the writer of a failing score. Why? The essay will automatically be considered lacking in discussion development, leading to a failing C + C score. The first reason is lacking in terms of example discussion and support. Making it the least developed paragraph in the discussion. Neither does it properly transition to the next paragraph.

Writing Feedback / Media focus far too much on the personal lives and relationships of different celebrities [2]

The first reasoning paragraph should be leased on the topic provided. The writer should have used the current 2nd paragraph as the first reason. That is because of its direct relationship to the given topic. By offering the related discussion first, a proper and related transition sentence could have been used to properly connect the celebrity and ordinary man comparison discussion.

The writer does not provide the correct 40 word, 2 sentence wrap up paragraph in the conclusion. The presentation could have delivered an appropriate recap had the proper concluding summary format been followed. Right now, it just represents the writer's opinion making it an incomplete conclusion.

Writing Feedback / [ IELTS ] The line graph illustrates the number of cars that were owned by households in Britain [3]

The writer has a tendency to use ven on sentences for his presentations. Though this makes it easier to complete sentence presentations, it affects the clarity of information as presented in the paragraphs. A clear sentence is one that focus on individual data delivery per sentence. Compressing the information confuses the sentence focus and paragraph discussion targets.

It is important that the writer makes better use of transition words to achieve this. There are no transition words or phrases used in the presentation which means the GRA score is compromised. While the presentation works to a certain degree, the writer can still do more the improve his score.

Writing Feedback / The percentage of people aged 65 and over in 3 distinctive nations during 100 years period - IELTS 1 [2]

The summary overview should list all 3 countries to give clarity to the trending presentation. The reader will wonder what nations are being compared and how it relates to the trend. To avoid such confusion, the future projection trend should be used.

The writer made a measurement projection in the last paragraph, indicating another or a repeated trending statement. That should only be presented once. The percentage measurement or assumption should have been presented instead.

Aside from these mistakes, the writer has done a good job of reporting data based on the image. He should however, learn to present paragraphs with similar sentence counts for formatting and conciseness considerations. Try to write only 100 words at the most.

Writing Feedback / Do you agree that the problems (what forms do they take?) outweigh the benefits of mobile phones? [2]

The writer cannot offer selective responses in the restatement + opinion paragraph. Both questions must have representative response topics. It helps the essay gain a better starting score. Outlining the discussions helps support the writer's opinion with clarity from the very start.

The reasoning paragraph lacks coherence because it started with employee phone use after hours then, without a related transition sentence, suddenly discusses children's health in relation to the topic. The writer should have used a related work reason instead for coherence considerations.

The next paragraph disconnects from the previous paragraph in the first half. Only the second sentence relates. Coherence means all the paragraphs must have inter-related discussions moving from one to the next. Topic relevance in relation to previously presented discussions are needed.If the first topic relates to work, then the full discussion must be based on a work discussion.

Writing Feedback / Electrical equipment changes in ownership and the amount of time expended on doing household chores [2]

The summary should indicate the end of the measurement period. The summary requires precise highlighted data for the benefit of the reader. The idea, is to inform regarding spotlighted information in a manner that does not require completely reading the essay. That is the objective of the summary paragraph. The writer failed to do this in a clear manner due to the run-on sentence presentation. He must learn to write short sentences that target information delivery in an individual manner.

Without having the actual image to compare the provided information, the data is clearly explained with sentence issues here and there. It is not enough to affect the information clarity though. This might be a passing presentation.

Writing Feedback / Problems & Solutions of a growing gap between technical skills of younger people and those over 50 [2]

Technical skills are only related to profession /work related abilities. The writers first reasoning paragraph is totally unrelated to the discussion. The reference is based on social needs, not technical requirements. That paragraph will be disregarded as a supporting statement related to the topic. It will not be given any scoring allowance. Now, the inclusion of this paragraph helped the writer meet the word count but,it caused the essay to provide an under-developed explanation with only one paragraph presenting a related discussion. So the essay has a discussion coherence problem due to the 2nd missing supporting statement. The C + C score will be low due to this presentation error. The essay may not recieve a passing mark due to the large score deduction in the aforementioned section.

Scholarship / Just thirty-six percent of women own small businesses. Personal statement KGSP undergraduate [2]

For starters, reviewers do not admire any student whose motivation for studies was influenced by a fictional movie character. Talk about Oprah winfrey, Michelle Obama, Melinda French Gates, Amal Clooney, Ivanka Trump, or any other successful and influential female executive who has a true track record of success and how that person's success or business mantra has influenced you. A movie character is trivial and not consistent with real world settings.

The mention of the scholarship in the second paragraph is inconsistent and misplaced. That is not the right paragraph to mention it in. Remove the reference. Mention it only in relation to what motivated you to study in Korea.The whole essay is focused only on the motivation and family background. It fails to address the rest of the requirements. The total essay needs to be revised to create the proper responses based on requirements. Represent the experiences and achievemients in a better manner.

Writing Feedback / The diagrams illustrate how the village of Stokeford had changed over an 80-year period, from 1930 [3]

Though the grammar presentation is problematic in terms of word usage and time references, the description is mostly on point. There was an image identification mistake at the start. The images are illustrations rather than diagrams. Diagrams relate to process instructions. Illustrations are drawings related to changes or adaptations in an area. Avoid exaggerated word or phrase use like"sacrifice of farmland." Since the drawings do not support a claim in relation to sacrifice, such erroneous claims must be avoided as it pertains to report accuracy.

The good news is that the report is still understandable on the reader's end. While perfect grammar is not expected, this is an example of understandable and clear imperfect grammar writing. The writer just needs to perfect his writing skills from this point. Suggestion: Do not say " On the other hand " if there is me reference to"On the one hand " in the previous paragraph.

Writing Feedback / Is it important for people to be concerned about the way they look? What are the consequences? [2]

The writer failed to identify if this is an IELTS task 2 essay or a mere writing exercise. It is difficult for me to give targeted advise when I have noidea what my review targets are. Kindly indicate that next time.

Regardless of what the purpose of the writing s, the first paragraph neeas to have clear discussion topics. The writer needed to present direct answers to the questions to meet that reqqucement. Without it, the say does not have a clear thesis basis / statement. The discussion direction and topics need to established in the first paragraph / introduction.

These discussions should not contain rhetorical questions because those are unnecessary content fillers. Do not keep repeating discussion points. That does not add clarity or more the discussion forward.

Do not include an afterthought example in the conclusion. The conclusion is just a recap. so added information is not necessary.

Writing Feedback / Percentage of Internet users in three countries USA, Canada and Mexico during the period 1999-2009 [3]

The summary overview can use more clarity. Compressing all 3 important presentation points in a single sentence will lessen the score in 2 sections: C+C and GRA. That will n the end result of the run on sentence presentation. Always aim to seperate the information using individual sentences. Divide it into:

- Image type
- Data representation
- Measurement Type
-Trending sentence (When applicable)

Why did I add the trending point as a sentence rather than a paragraph? A trending sentence provides exactly that, a steady measurement of data. Attending paragraph is not always needed. It should, in fact, be avoided because students tend to start the analysis at that point rather in the reporting paragraph or create a redundancy. Case in point:


The statement indicates the same information twice. The second sentence should actually be part of the extended report as the topic sentence.

The last paragraph requires an extra sentence to meet the minimum requirement per paragraph.

Writing Feedback / The debate about giving rewards to exceptional students or well-advanced ones [2]

The paraphrase will get a failing score for including personal opinions of the writer based on the general discussion rather than just restating the original facts. The original discussion points have been changed. It is no longer an accurate restatement.

The response format, though covering both points of view, does not fall under the required public opinion comparative analysis prior to the writer's opinion. Both paragraphs represent the opinion of the writer alone. The essay meets only 1 out of 3 discussion considerations based on the public T explanation.. It is not properly nor completely developed so it can only recieve a third of scoring considerations in the TA and C + C sections because of this presentation mistake.

* contact me privately for scoring consultation.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING - TASK 2 - INVENTION OF COMPUTER [3]

The writer presents a clear understanding of the topic. The restatement is well-worded and shows a relevant word usage. The opinion follows the suggested response format. Discussion basis presentations are on the mark and increase the accuracy of the restatement + opinion paragraph.

When writing based on personal knowledge the winter must include a short description when the example is native to his county. Explaining what and how Kahoot is used could have increased the clarity of the paragraph. The examiner is not familiar with the app so an explanation would have benefitted the C + C score.

The writer mistakenly wrote a concluding run on sentence for his conclusion. He must be aware that this is a concluding PARAGRAPH not a concluding SENTENCE. It requires the same 3-5 sentence paragraph format comprised of the topic restatement, writer's opinion, and supporting reasons focus to fall under correct scoring considerations.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: LINE GRAPH - the number of cars registered for the first time by fuel type [3]

The report does not meet the 150-200 word requirement for the task. Under former scoring guidelines, this would result in an automatic failing score. However, new guidelines allow for word count deductions to be applied while the other scoring sections are completed. This however, does not result in a passing score. It just means the score will not be 0.

The chart type is not indicated in the presentation. The petrol types are not listed either. The paragraph formations do not use the minimum standards either. The analysis requires a longer observational report. The presentation fails to provide all data that may be used for scoring. The writer has notmack a true effort to pass the test.

Writing Feedback / The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 [2]

The task one essay should be completed within 200 words. The writer has only 20 minutes to write the report, with 5 minutes allowance provided to correct writing errors. The writer needs to develop a short but informative writing style to meet the time limit.

There is an incomplete image identification as to the type of chart provided. The writer still does not have accurate information regarding the measurement presentation. Since there is no image provided, the writer will lose points in terms of image accuracy. The writer should have completed this presentation in 3 paragraphs. Since only 1 image was provided, a trending sentence would have been more word count compliant when compared to a trending paragraph. The 3nd paragraph could have also been presented in a shorter report manner.

Writing Feedback / Discovering the stories and facts connected to the house or the building in which we reside [3]

Do not make assumptions in the presentation as this indicates the writer is not confident of his opinion. The task 2 essay is an analytical opinion statement and must be stated with confidence in the facts provided. There are no right or wrong answers so there need not be an "on the fence" response. By the way, the essay requires discussion outlines, not repeated instructions. State the topic responses directly, without a discussion.

The response paragraphs are clearly presented with proper samples. More transition words /sentence usage would have added scoring substance though. The writer needs to develop a better summary conclusion over 2-5 sentences for proper scoring application.

Writing Feedback / Adults continue to live with parents after they graduated [4]

The topic restatement was well developed and clearly offered to the reader. However, the opinion statement lost its focus and clarity to the point where it became almost incomprehensible to the leader. Several readings of the opinion sentence Was required to decipher the two sense of the statement. This will be a negative GRA preliminary scoring consideration at the start.

The writer has not explained his reasons in the needed format. His already fuzzy opinion is further affected by his comparison reasoning in a single opinion essay. The prompt requires a 2 paragraph discussion of why his stated opinion is correct. As in a debate, the purpose is to prove the other side wrong. The writer lost focus and instead said "Both opinions are correct" instead of "My opinion is the only correct one in this arguement". Scores can only be provided for discussion paragraphs in support of the writers opinion statement.

Writing Feedback / Write sales report on top five mobile phone brands for a university lecturer [2]

The summary overview should have responded to the following qquestions to qualify as a complete quick-rundown:
- What brands are being compared? (In relation to the trending statement)
- Indicate the units of measurement for sold units
- comparative years (It is not a continous graph measurement.That representation is incorrect)

The writer stated the measurement topic twice in the presentation. This is proof of lack of editing and proofreading of the essay. While the comparison paragraphs are acceptable, the repeated line will cause TA and C + C deductions of a minimal kind. Precise presentations all a must even in practice tests as these assements help the writer prepare for actual test scoring.