Undergraduate / Why Michigan? Political Science and Psychology [4]

Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including preferred admission and dual degree programs) to which you are applying at the University of Michigan.

As I matured, I was perpetually asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Despite the monotony of the question, I always enthusiastically set about describing my desired career path. As to be expected, my response varied frequently over the years, but I now aspire to be a doctor with a law degree. Subsequently, I believe the University of Michigan is the perfect place to implement my personalized career path, majoring in Political Science and Psychology in The College of Literature, Science, and the Arts.

I am drawn to The College of Literature, Science, and the Arts at U-M because of its liberal arts curriculum. As my career endeavors have changed countless times in the past, at U-M, I do not have to be wary of a newly acquired academic interest. Additionally, with the offering of Michigan Learning Communities, I would belong to a smaller community within the larger University of Michigan community. Therefore, in a MLC, I would be connected with students and professors who share my interests. Nonetheless, with academic advisors, learning centers, Project Outreach, and ADVICE Online there are no limits to a University of Michigan education.

As a renowned research institution, U-M is my quintessential academic and social community and as an undergraduate, I want to be a part of the "Michigan Difference." U-M turns students into professionals and individual passions into a career; therefore, I know that Michigan can prepare me for future success. Furthermore, as a University of Michigan LSA undergraduate I can fulfill my educational interests, participate in revolutionary research, and study abroad. University of Michigan will provide me with a place to grow, learn, interact with a diverse group of individuals, and be unique. Similarly, as an LSA undergraduate, I imagine myself browsing the well-stocked shelves of the one of the world's largest library systems, as well as, playing intramural sports.

College is a medium through which students can turn themselves into what they want to be. I aspire to be a member of the extensive University of Michigan LSA community; I want to be a Wolverine.

This is due soon so any critiques are wanted. Additionally, I will read your essay in return.

Undergraduate / "a history that began in rural Mississippi" - Michigan short culture essay [3]

Rural Mississippi

Tethered to the world by the chains of history; I covet the stories of my ancestors. I am defined by my community, by my ethnicity, and by my history, but I am also defined by unique identity.

My family history began in Sharon, Mississippi where my great-great grandmother Minerva Mae Davis married Reggie Caleb Porter and later made a home with their nine children: Phillip, Eldridge, Reggie Jr., Lloyd, Minnie, John, Coleman, Robert, and Maudell. Reggie Sr., a railroad worker, died in a train accident and Minerva Mae died of kidney failure after sitting in a hospital waiting room for two days. She was denied treatment because of her ethnicity, constantly being shoved down the waiting list every time a Caucasian walked through the door. Eventually, Minerva Mae acquiesced to her fate and returned home where she died in her sleep. Therefore, after the death of her parents, Minnie, the oldest took over the care of her younger siblings.

This story is the foundation of my heritage, a history that began in rural Mississippi, but now, occupies a multitude of different geographies. I am a member of the Minerva May Davis family, her community. A community that now encompasses different religions, education levels, and incomes.

I am among the two hundred proud individuals that attends the family reunion each Fourth of July, sporting the uniform brightly colored family t-shirt. Moreover, I sit perched among the family tree as the granddaughter of Reggie Jr., the second youngest child of Reggie Sr. and Minerva Mae.

I feel like this is missing something and needs work so any comments are greatly appreciated and I will read your essay in return. Thank you

Undergraduate / I want to be a leader. Why Oxford essay [5]

1. Describe your specific interest in beginning your Emory career at Oxford College and how you think our liberal arts intensive education is a good match for you.

Oxford College cultivates leaders, and I intend to be one. Moreover, the college's dedication to service and leadership will prepare me for post undergraduate life and future endeavors.

By beginning my undergraduate study at Oxford, I will be afforded a comfortable transition from my small high school to the close knit community of Oxford College. With the multitude of opportunities offered at Oxford, I will be able to pursue my various interests such as writing an article for The Spokesman, participating in Theory- Practice/Service Learning (TPSL), or rock climbing on the quad.

Oxford gives students a voice and with the small class sizes, my voice will be heard. Similarly, with the flexible liberal arts curriculum offered at Oxford College, I will receive a holistic education, taking interesting courses such as Human Nature in Politics from the Feminine Perspective encompassing both my academic interests of Political Science and Psychology.

I have always been told that, "the consequences of choices lie in the future," and that the framework of our future is constructed by our actions now. Therefore, I am making a decision about my future by choosing to be a leader and by choosing to apply to Oxford College. I am designating my future because with an Oxford education, I know I will obtain the foundation necessary for success. At Oxford I will become a change agent.

Undergraduate / Emory College why Emory. "The wise heart seeks knowledge" [3]

The Prompt
Many students decide to apply to Emory College based on our size, location, reputation, and yes, the weather. Besides these valid reasons for making Emory College a possible college choice, why is Emory College a particularly good match for you?

Emory College has an unparalleled academic and social community that transforms students into professionals and individual passions into a career. I know that at Emory University I can flourish, be innovative, and fulfill my educational desires.

I first stumbled upon Emory as a timid third grader; my stepfather worked at Emory Hospital and was admitted as a patient there after he had an aneurysm. One afternoon, tired of being pent up in the hospital for days, my Uncle approached my sister and me saying, "We were going on an adventure." This mysterious adventure led us to the urban campus of Emory University and after walking through the Haygood-Hopkins Memorial Gateway, I knew Emory was where I wanted to attend college.

Now, years later I still aspire to be an Emory Eagle. I want to visit different booths on Wonderful Wednesday, I want to browse the shelves of the Robert W. Woodruff library, and I want participate in Cultural Beats. Emory will provide me with a place to grow, educate my inquiring mind, and interact with a diverse body of people. As an Emory student, I see myself achieving academic success, engaging in revolutionary research, training to become an EMT-Intermediate, and participating in the Emory European Politics Program. At Emory College I can pursue my academic disciplines of Political Science and Psychology without limits.

College is a medium through which students can turn themselves into what they want to be. I aspire to be a member of the Emory community. Moreover, I want to live by the Emory motto, "Cor Prudentis Possidebit Scientiam" or "The wise heart seeks knowledge." My heart desires the knowledge acquired through an Emory education.

Any help is appreciated as this is due tomorrow and I am willing to read your essays in return. Also this is over the word limit so any cuts are also welcome. Thank you in advance and be harsh.

Undergraduate / "Women are still not equal to men" - Why Wellesley short [4]

The Prompt
'When choosing a college, you are choosing an intellectual community and a place where you believe that you can live, learn, and flourish. To this end, the Board of Admission is interested in knowing your reasons for applying to Wellesley College and how Wellesley will help you to realize your personal and academic goals.'

My response
Tethered to the world by the chains of history, women are still engaged in a struggle to obtain equality that is effortlessly given to men. We are immersed in a culture where women are no longer required to tread ten steps behind a man, nonetheless, I want more. I want to sing myself hoarse during Step-Singing, I want to browse the shelves of the campus library, and I want bask in the sun on the Severance Green.

Tethered to the world by the chains of history, women are still engaged in a struggle to obtain societal positions that are effortlessly given to men. We may live in a culture where women are no longer required to tread ten steps behind a man, but progress still needs to be made. Clair Babrowski, retired Executive Vice President of Toys 'R' Us, once said, "We picture men in leadership roles. As a woman you already have this hurdle to overcome." As a woman interested in pursuing a career field dominated by men, I believe Wellesley College can help me overcome these hurdles and provide me with the foundation necessary for success. Wellesley cultivates leaders, and I intend to be one.

Wellesley College has an unparalleled academic and social community that transforms students into professionals and individual passions into a career. With the flexibility of a liberal arts curriculum, at Wellesley I can flourish, be innovative, and fulfill my educational desires. At Wellesley, I want to sing myself hoarse during Step-Singing, I want to browse the shelves of the campus library, and I want bask in the sun on the Severance Green. Wellesley gives students a voice and with the small class sizes, my voice will be heard. The college's dedication to service and leadership will prepare me for post graduate life, by providing me with a holistic education, while also allowing me to focus on my academic disciplines of International Relations and Political Science. Additionally, Wellesley will provide me with a place to be unique, to grow, to educate my inquiring mind, and to interact with a diverse body of people. As a Wellesley student, I can picture myself achieving academic success, studying abroad, engaging in revolutionary research, living in Tower Court, and participating in the Wellesley in Washington Internship Program. Furthermore, with the exchange program and the city of Boston located only miles away, there are no limits to a Wellesley education.

College is a medium through which students can turn themselves into what they want to be. I aspire to be a member of the Wellesley community; I want to be a Wellesley Woman. Moreover, I want to live by the Wellesley motto "Non Ministrari sed Ministrare-Not to be ministered unto, but to minister"

Any feedback would be great as this is due today and I will read your essay in return. Do you think I should add more because I feel like I should. Be mean please

Undergraduate / Great academic and social community--Why BU [5]

The Prompt
Given what you know about Boston University, what do you hope to accomplish as an undergraduate here? Please respond in an essay of no more than 500 words.

My Response

"Boston University is a great academic and social community." This is one of the many things I have discovered about the global institution that is BU. In searching for an extraordinary college, I found BU. With over 250 programs and majors, I can examine multiple fields before choosing among the various internship opportunities offered to satisfy any career track.

As a Boston University undergraduate I want to exploit the BU Advantage. Located in the metropolitan city of Boston, BU will provide me with a place to grow, educate my inquiring mind, interact with a diverse range of people, and be unique. I aspire to be a member of the BU community. I want to discover new things and take on new interests. I want to personalize my Boston University degree by double majoring in the College of Arts and Sciences, not only pursuing my passion for medicine and Political Science, but also learning how to play the piano.

BU turns students into professionals. As doctors turn sick patients into healthy ones, Boston University turns student's passions into a career. I want to be that doctor, the one performing an exploratory surgery to find a tumor, the one who follows a patient through sickness and health. As a result, upon graduating college I wish to pursue graduate school and eventually enter the workforce with a career in medicine. I believe that Boston University can prepare for success with their emphasis on a liberal arts curriculum. With a diverse background in core subjects such as humanities and math, I can receive a holistic education while still focusing on my academic discipline.

As a Boston University undergraduate I imagine myself achieving academic success, engaging in revolutionary research, living in Warren Towers, fueling my creativity through the Travel Writing in Australia program, and participating in the Washington Internship Program experiencing politics firsthand. I want to bask in the sun of the BU beach while reading an intriguing novel as well as catch "the T" to immerse myself in Boston's culture. I want to take a walk through the Boston Commons and catch a weekend performance in the basement of the George Sherman student union, play intramural sports, drift along the lazy river, and attend hockey games.

College is a medium through which student can turn themselves into what they want to be. I hope to be a Boston University student; I want to be a Terrier.

Any comments are welcome and appreciated. Do you think I should add anything, take anything out, or expand on anything? As always I am willing to edit anyone's essay in return. Thank You.

Undergraduate / Achieving academic success, revolutionary research, studying in Paris - Why UChicago? [10]

The prompt
How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to Chicago.

My response

Coasting down the highway, eager to reach my destination, I began my excursion from Atlanta to Hyde Park. 710 miles separated me from University of Chicago's beautiful snow covered, suburban campus. At last, on the second day of my journey, I arrived in Chicago's metropolitan area and upon spotting the famous museums and attractions I was jolted from my haze of worn cement and white lines. "Yes!" I exclaimed, while fishing through my bag for directions to navigate the unfamiliar streets of Chicago. Eventually, I reached Hyde Park-Maroon territory. As a high school junior, one individual among a mass of prospective students, I only hoped to learn about the curriculum offered at University of Chicago; however, I found so much more. By the end of my visit, I resolved to spend my next four years wearing maroon while exploring my passion for Political Science and Psychology in the Social Sciences division of The College.

During the information session, I discovered that UChicago operates under a ten week calendar system-the quarter system. A medium for autonomy, the quarter system, not only solidified my interest in pursuing a double major, but also set University of Chicago apart during my college search. I loved everything about University of Chicago-from the core curriculum, small class sizes, theological seminary, and Regenstein Library to the house system with resident masters. Moreover, with the flexibility offered at UChicago, I knew I could flourish, be innovative, and fuel my creativity.

Whereas the tour seized my attention, the campus traditions such as scav hunt, summer breeze, estroand testo fest, Super Secular Secret Santa, and dance marathon, compelled me to want to participate, or even initiate my own tradition. As I browsed the shelves of co-op bookstore, I pictured myself as a UChicago undergraduate achieving academic success, engaging in revolutionary research, studying abroad in Paris with the social sciences program, living in Max P, avoiding the seal in the Reynolds Club like the plague, joining the Society for Creative Anachronism, and ice skating for the first time. I imagined myself following the progression of the Cobb Gate Gargoyles; I imagined myself as a Maroon.

I don't really like this essay so any comments with be great. This is due in a few hours so please feel free to be harsh and tell me if I need to add or take something away. As always I will read your essay in return. Thank you

Undergraduate / Two types of people in the world UChicago Essay [7]

The Prompt
Essay Option 2. Dog and Cat. Coffee and Tea. Great Gatsby and Catcher in the Rye. Everyone knows there are two types of people in the world. What are they?

My response

The holidays are rapidly approaching, causing mass hysteria to sweep the nation. Christmas shoppers trample through stores, rummaging for last minute presents, and families prepare for the annual excursion to see grandma and grandpa.

Rushing through the congested terminals, a bag of presents secured perilously under one arm, parents drag their children through the masses. Approaching the seemingly limitless line of the security check point, people find themselves wondering, "How in the world did I believe that arriving two hours early would give me enough time to reach concourse E." After waiting to transcend through the checkpoint, your turn approaches and you pray not to be among the unlucky individuals asked to step aside for further inspection. As luck would have it-you are chosen.

Finally, upon reaching a wasteland of occupied chairs you collapse into the first vacant seat. After settling your raging heart, you peer out the wall length windows and watch as airport employees carelessly toss luggage into the belly of the plane. You find yourself wondering if the bag that missed and went tumbling toward to the Earth was yours. Then, dampening the Christmas cheer, a disembodied voice crackles through the intercom saying, "Ho Ho Ho, Happy Holidays Christmas travelers it is with genuine regret that I must announce that due to temperamental weather conditions all flights are grounded until further notice." A disgruntled groan escapes the lips of every individual before they race to claim a hard backed chair as if the music had just stopped in a game of musical chairs. Two hours later, hunger grips your stomach and you resign to relinquishing your seat to purchase the overpriced fast food the airport offers.

An hour passes and flights are set to take off once again. Entering the compact space of the plane, you walk towards your aisle seat and drift through the air for the next two hours, with your ears continuously popping. The pilot's voice reverberates through the plane, "Folks, we have begun our decent into White Plains and the current temperature is 32 degrees Fahrenheit, so will passengers fasten in their seatbelts, turn off their electronic devices, and lift up their tray tables." Ultimately, you arrive at your destination jet lagged and late.

Comparatively, there are the individuals who choose to drive to their Christmas destination. Calling the every Enterprise, Hertz, Avis, and U-haul in a 20 mile radius and they discover that a vacant car is non-existent. Therefore, a thousand miles must be put on the family vehicle. Departing during rush hour, they are trapped, inching their way toward their destination. A 16 hour drive just became that much longer and every mile gained is as exciting as winning the lottery. All but stagnant, they hope to get stuck behind a minivan in order to entertain themselves with the movie playing in the backseat.

Around the third time hitting traffic, driving no longer seems like the economical choice for large families or people who developed aviophobia after September 11, 2001. Stops are only allowed in large towns and then only for gas, coffee, and bathroom breaks, therefore, rest stops become novelties and a place to stretch your legs before riding between the white lines once again. After 18 hours, six stops, an empty cooler, and a tired driver you have reached your destination.

There are two types of people in the world: people who prefer to travel by car and people who prefer to travel by plane.

Any comments are helpful. Rip it apart if need be. Also I will read your essays.
Do you think I need to include a paragraph about which type of person I am? Also can someone please help me get rid of the word you in this essay. Thanks

Undergraduate / My childhood innocence- Wake Forest short essay [3]

The prompt
Describe the culture in which you grew up. What are its strengths and weaknesses?

My childhood was a time when all of my artwork was beautiful enough to be displayed in a gallery-the refrigerator. My biggest concerns were making sure my tooth was stationed perfectly beneath my pillow, learning to ride a bike without training wheels, falling asleep before Santa arrived, and organizing my beanie baby collection by name and birthday.

My innocence cultivated me and taught me morals; however, it was also the source of a later feeling of dejection. Moreover, I learned perseverance from riding my bike, continuously hoping back on after every fall, and I laid the ground work for organization while trifling with my plush toy animals. However, my childhood innocence never prepared me for the discovery that reindeer could not fly or the fact that my mother was played the role of both Santa and the Tooth Fairy.

please help, I hate it.

Undergraduate / Fight for the cure- Wake Forest short essay [2]

What idea most challenges you

Wandering through the crowded mall corridors I heard a disembodied voice roar, "The iPhone 5 is set to launch this July." Turing my head to identify the shouting culprit, I watched other bystanders do the same. Nonetheless, unable to uncover who released the excited squeal, I allowed my feet to guide my path once again. However, I had only traveled a few paces before a woman scoffed, "technology" as she turned to leave. Gazing at this stranger, I wondered why she expressed such contempt for technology. This unknown woman compelled me to question the very life force for society's teenagers, technology, by uttering one word and the wearing a Fight for the Cure t-shirt. I began to question how advancements in technology can constantly be achieved but there still be no cure for cancer.

I really need help on this as I don't like it much and ideas on how to make it better?

Undergraduate / I wish I knew -Wake Forest short essay [2]

The prompt
I wish I knew...

My Essay

Dressed in my Sunday's best I padded down the aisle, mindlessly walking toward my customary seat. Sitting among the mass of Sunday regulars all I heard was booming silence. Looking around, I noticed the steadily moving mouths of the choir and the clapping of the congregation, but I was stagnant. Stationed in my pew, I wrinkled my brow. After countless sermons spanned across seventeen years, I had my first religious question. Not wanting to disturb anyone else, I opened the red leather bound book in front of me in an attempt to quell my inquiring mind. However, after scouring the pages my question was still left unanswered. I was confused. I sat, contemplating this uncertainty until my mother tapped my shoulder, an indication that it was time to leave. Gazing upward to acknowledge her, the words spewed from my mouth, "what is Satan's middle name?"

Undergraduate / Hunger occurs all over, volunteering -Wake Forest short essay [2]

The prompt
What outrages you? What are you doing about it?

My response
Advertisements yank at the heartstrings of America's public by portraying the angelic face of a malnourished child abroad. Donate money to stop the war in Darfur, help stop hunger in Africa! Multiple compassionate individuals are willing to hand out money to these worthy causes, and yet they have no problem walking past the man on the corner asking "can you spare a dollar?" Also, what becomes of the undernourished family forced to consume McDonald's everyday because it is the most economical option? These are the things that outrage me. How can a humanitarian society turn a blind eye to the suffering around them while helping another with the same needs? Why are people willing to attend a benefit concert rather than volunteer at the local homeless shelter? Can we not solve problems occurring at home and overseas? Nonetheless, what am I going to do about the issues? Well, I'm going to volunteer at the local shelter and try to stop hunger one peanut butter and jelly sandwich at a time.

Comments?

Undergraduate / "March to the Beat of your own drum" -Wake Forest short essay [4]

The Prompt
As a part of 2010 Wake Forest orientation, the freshman class examined The Andes of Ecuador, a painting by Frederic Church. Next year what work of visual or performing art should the incoming class analyze? Why?

My response

Undeterred by spartan surroundings, an elderly man exudes warmth as he instructs a young boy in playing the banjo. Portraying African-American culture in an unprecedented perspective, Henry Tanner's painting; The Banjo Lesson was revolutionary for shattering the stereotypes surrounding a culture. As an innovative dreamer, Tanner, despite adversity evoked compassion by capturing the innocence of a child, portraying their innate determination to learn.

This painting warrants acknowledgement as there is something to be learned from a banjo player. Reaching beyond the canvas, students can discover that motivation drives creativity. Tanner desired to augment society's perception of a culture and he succeeded. Moreover, one can discover that it is acceptable to "march to the beat of your own drum," to be innovative.

Any more advice on why the next class should analyze it? Any suggestions are helpful as I feel like I have not expressed enough reasons. Thank you

Also I will read your essay

Undergraduate / My journey to Northwestern (Psychology and Law and Psychology and Health) [12]

My response

Coasting down the highway, it was mid-February and school was out for a six day break. Eager to reach my destination, I began my excursion from Atlanta to Evanston, relishing in every mile gained along the boundless highway. 734 miles separated me from Northwestern University's beautiful snow covered, suburban campus. On the second day of my journey, I reached Chicago's metropolitan area and upon spotting the famous museums and attractions I was jolted from my haze of worn cement and white lines. "Yes," I exclaimed, fishing through the depth of my bag to find directions to navigate the unfamiliar streets of Chicago.

Eventually, I reached Evanston-Wildcat territory. As a high school junior, one individual among a mass of prospective students, I hoped to obtain information about the curriculum offered at Northwestern. However, I acquired so much more. During the information session, as an admissions representative described the schools that make up Northwestern, I resolved to spend my next four years wearing Northwestern purple and exploring my passions for Political Science and Psychology in the Weinberg College of Arts and Sciences. Subsequently, I became captivated by the benefits of the quarter system, an unheard of approach to the academic calendar to me. Nevertheless, the quarter system, granting the ability to focus on courses in quarters rather than having to juggle five to six classes a semester, quickly became an asset in my college search. Moreover, I perceived the quarter system to be a medium for autonomy as well as a benefit to students interested in double majoring.

At the session's close, my curiosity drew me towards a mass of purple and white information sheets. Among these pages two headings caught my attention: Psychology and Law and Psychology and Health Professions. Contemplating both law and medicine as future professions, I became curious to learn how Northwestern linked these academic disciplines, so to quell my inquiring mind I collected a copy of both sheets and joined the campus tour. The tour guide's reverence when elaborating on the campus traditions of painting the rock, "Dillo Day" and NUDM compelled me to want to take part in tradition, or even initiate one of my own. Therefore, as my feet crunched against the snow, I imagined myself as a Northwestern undergraduate achieving academic success, engaging in revolutionary research, studying abroad, living in themed housing, and attending football games. I imagined myself as a Wildcat.

Please Help, I know some of it is awkward. Rip it apart if need be. Also I promise to read your essay