Writing Feedback / Equal responsibility of parents - what's your opinion? IELTS TASK 2 [3]

"Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up."

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In this globalization era, several inhabitants claim that fatherhood has to responsible as same as motherhood. While, others think mothers are only one to decide weather just wife will determine children and taking their baby growing up. In my personal opinion, I believe both man and woman are equal responsibility for their son or daughter as it will take a wide range of advantages although the other dwellers think the opposite.

On the one hand, society opine if mothers can allow to decide herself, it will be easy and create a lot of benefit for their children. The major one is, motherhood recognizes their baby so deeply, therefore they might easy to choose the best food and education for their baby to growing up. also wonderful mothers know regarding their physic and psychology when they start to bird, beside fathers should hard think about financial life, as a consequence, it disturbs the man to seek out plenty of many for family. As a result, mother should commit their affair their children by their self because it is more precise manner.

On the other hand, there is a strong reason that man and women are similar affair. First of all, the creature as girls are more stressful if they maintenance their children alone, it supports by Journal Scientist that brain in woman more vulnerable than man, for that, they need man who can support each other. Not only this, mother can be difficult to devote time in family, as an illustration, the household must do their household tasks lonely as clean floor, cooking, further looking after their baby for this factor, husband ought to accompany their wife to determine having children and helping them to grow up.

To sum up, even though females know very clearly regarding their children, the proper way commit collaboration together with their husband to decide a good role model for their son or daughter, therefore it constructs amazing outweigh to their baby.

Writing Feedback / Out of country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to prevention [3]

Prevention is better than cure
Out of country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventive measures.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In this globalization era, many people argue that charge of country's health should be spent for treatment regarding health educations and preventive measures in immense portion. In my personal view, I believe healthy determent will bring wide range of advantages in life, although directed treatment is precise way for mankind.

On the one hand, several inhabitants claim the most essential for health is curing, for that, the government has to invest into direct care, the major factor is more immediately to devastating illness, when people get heart attack suddenly, It is automatic, the sufferer takes in hospital for getting straight medication. The other argument is more real to see comparing preventive. If people gain problem in their brain and body, they will get advice or potion from team medic, which they can see symptom and result obviously. Therefor, the administrator has to spend in the straight cure.

On the other hand, there are major reason to support this idea which healthy education and preventive measure are foundation of country. First of all, direct medication is more expensive, the article from Mediciana.com shows the state might save 100 pounds every single year for the cure. Not only this, the civilizations have ability to avoid germs or aphids, therefore they are healthier and stronger to confront disease. As a consequence, the government has to provide a field for team to campaign regarding educations and measures of healthy of entire inhabitants.

To sum up, both preventing and curing are as same as important way to face the sickness, but the best way to destroy disease is the prohibit as it can be economic and safety. Where possible, human should check up their physic and psychology regularly to obtain more effective results.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 : certain talents as sport and music for people, both view [NEW]

In general believe that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and other are not. However. It is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In this globalization era, there are argumentation that several children are born with specific aptitudes as sport and music, while others reverse. Yet, many inhabitants think it can be taught to become an athlete or a singer. In my personal view, I believe ability will make easy to achieve their goal, although teaching people precisely can build their purpose is reached.

On the one hand, society opine that human who learning hardly can accomplish their dream properly when it support by wonderful teaching even they do not have talents. One of main factor is passion, it is appropriate way to complete people target by teaching, as a illustration, children who having big passion never give up, they will learn tiny steps which are influence their abilities, in their school or university. The Music and sport have technique which is taught in the course, for that, if people continue learning and knowing about technique they can be able toward their target.

On the other hand, there are strong reasons that talents are essential parts in the humanities to be good sportsman or musician. First of all, it is easy for inhabitants to learning, for example, the famous football player, Lionel Messi. He has aptitude in soccer games, as a consequence, he makes history by collection 4 trophy Ballon Dior. Not only this, Talents can construct certain ability as different awesome voice, therefore, the powerful singer, Adele is not difficult for singing the stages without having a teacher.

To sum up, teaching or talent is an important subject for civilization, of course, when people want to achieve their goal very completely they must have both ability and learning hardy by teaching. These obviously musics and sports are not complication to mastering

Writing Feedback / Ielts task 1 : Consumer of stuff in Britain - explanation of the graph [2]

An explanation regarding consumer durable portion which is divided into 8 items in the Britain over the course of 11 years is illustrated by graph. Overall, it clearly can be seen that, the percentages of households with all divisions obtained a rise of statistic. In any case, television dominated entire categories although dishwasher got the smallest figure.

According to the table, from eight sectors, the television was the greatest data which got upward trend around 98% in the last year. It was stark in contrast to dishwasher, it was the lowest table around 3 to 5 percent. Furthermore, there was a telephone and washing machine at 42% and 66% in 1972 while in the last period, these gained 77 and 80 percent in 1983 respectively.

Turning to vacuum cleaner this was odd data, it started at 87% in the first phases and missing figure in the last period. Nevertheless, video appeared only in 1983 at 18 percent. Meanwhile, central heating obtained uncertainly statistic in the first year, but it still expanded following this year. When it came to refrigerator, it witnessed approximately at 90% in throughout the period.

Writing Feedback / ielts task 1: A comparison regarding prisoners in 5 decades is elaborated in the bar graph [2]

A comparison regarding prisoners in the five countries namely Great Britain, Australia, New Zealand, United States and Canada in 5 decades is elaborated in the bar graph. Overall, it clearly can be seen that, The United States had the largest number of imprisonment while Australia saw a lower data at the end of the period.

A closer look at the table shows that, at the beginning to the middle phases. There was the greatest figure of imprisonment, it was more than 120 thousand prisoners. In 1940, it is stark in contrast to Great Britain with less than 30 thousand prisoners in the first year. However, 1950 witnessed a minor gap between Newzeland-Australia and America-Canada.

Above all, during 3-decade period, the United states continued to be dominated with immense occupant of people in jail. Although it fell down at 99 thousand prisoners, that expanded to peak of performance in the last session. While Great Britain, Australia and New Zealand recorded at as same as influx in 1970, but Australia dropped sharply in 1980.

• 
  imprisonment.gif
  

Writing Feedback / Juvenile delinquency - young people experience. IELTS task 2 [2]

The position of women in the society has changed markedly in the last twenty years. Many of the problems young people now experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The mischievous young generation has expanded. Proportion of females in inhabitants has shifted extremely over the course of twenty years. There is a wide range of complications such as mischief of young age, it causes high of employees on married women and mothers do not look for their children. In my personal view, i disagree if we just judge women mistake. Although womenfolk bring dire consequence, environment and friendly are the most essential one to effect of juvenile.

On the one hand, several dwellers have given reason that juvenile delinquency due to by trend of women who become workers , for that, they never have time for family particularly their boys and girls. When mothers can stay in house where they spend entire their time to teach and educate young generation with moral behavior, of course, it will create essential value for them and contributed with how they act on the environment. Not only this, women just focus on the job , even she never watches their children, therefore, it emerges detrimental effect.

On the other hand, there are the biggest reasons to support that women are not fully guilty as it causes most of the time other factors, first of all, the environment, it major constructs corrosive effect for the youth which they can involve by a rule of field around them. Other parts that often crop up is friendly which is used by inhabitant to socialize each other, this can influence the young age where they grow up in an area, as a consequence, they often establish conversation and keeping in touch with their friend.

To sum up, the juvenile delinquency is the case when the three items are not functioning properly, therefore, time management from women's career, environment and relationship between young age are rally connection with children's behavior. So we have to create stability of character for young children in their life.

Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1: forecast of weather in Australian Bureu of Meteorology [2]

An explanation of information regarding process to collect data for foreseeing reliable weather by the Australian Bureu of Meteorology is illustrated in the chart. Overall, it clearly can be seen that, the process is divided into three immense parts, before that, it is analyzed by computer for broadcasters to entire corner of the public

At the beginning of the stages, raw data will be driven by satellites for interpretation and prediction into satellite photo. While it connects with radar screen and sends importance data on the system computer. Other data as a synoptic chart which is founded from drifting buoy that puts off on the coastline is transferred on computer device.

Above all, weather news can be accessed by society through prepared steps in electronic device. Following this, figure is broadcasted in different ways such as television newsreader, electronic radio and recorded announcement by phone which give information of weather condition to mass people.

• 
  Academic_IELTS_Writi.png
  

Writing Feedback / An explanation regarding developing populations in the Chorleywood village near London - ielts 1 [2]

An explanation regarding developing populations in the Chorleywood village near London between 1868 and 1994. Overall, it clearly can be seen that, there was four periods of time, which contain expand inhabitants and each of area was near of 3 major lines of transportation.

At the first time of area, from 1868 to 1883, there was a small field covered by the Chorleywood. It offered just main road which very closed with the Chorleywood Park and Golf course. Furthermore, the village had created motorway in 1970. The countryside was an increased area along the main road in the south between 1883 and 1922. At this time, the railway line constructed in the field from the east to west.

The growing of village continued to east and west alongside the railway line in 1922-1970. While on the other part, it raised in population around motorway in the five immense areas intersection with the railway and one of the main road from 1970 to 1994.

• 
  VILLAGE_OF_CHORLEYWO.png
  

Writing Feedback / Comparisons regarding the number of heat level per month and annual hours of sunshine; IELTS 1 [2]

Comparisons regarding the number of heat level in every month and annual hours of sunshine over the course of one year are illustrated in the line graph and table. Overall, it clearly can be seen that the figure looks significant fluctuation In any case, the New York gets immense sunshine, while the London is the smallest statistic.

According to the data particularly in the line chart, the advance cities as Sydney records the greatest temperature in the first month, there is 25 Celsius for humidifier range, next, it plunges in the middle period to 15 Celsius, yet the data witness an increase in December. It is stark in contrast to the New York, this capital city in the America obtains a increase sharply which is the peak performance at 30 Celsius on July. Furthermore, the data falls down to 5 Celsius in the last period, when it comes to London, the temperature level is as similar as with the New York. Both of them look parabola curve, even though the London is slightly expanded heat level.

Turning to the other chart, the New York sees the highest figure of sunlight, it has 2.535 daylight. In contrast, the London obtains the smallest at 1,180 glow of sun every hour. The other figure the Sydney records at the second position with 2,473 sunshine.

• 
  images_33.jpg
  

Writing Feedback / A comparison of three different countries on annual GDP development over the course of four years [2]

A comparison of three different countries on annual GDP development over the course of four years. Overall, it clearly can be seen that the greatest percentage was Tunisia and Japan in the first and the end of the period. While the GDP figure for Tunisia had significant increased, Japan witnessed a decrease sharply in the last phase.

In 2007, there was the greatest percentage of Tunisia's GDP at more than 6 percent, while the Ecuador saw a half as much. Japan's GDP development showed a very small proportion. By 2010,

Tunisia's GDP had decreased sharply to 3 percent, while Ecuador had plunged slightly to 2,5 percent. The GDP growth in Japan had increased threefold .

Again, while the proportion of Tunisia's GDP saw a downward trend, this showed a sign of stagnating to 3 percent in 2009 onward. After a peak, Ecuador's GDP had plummeted to 1.2%. This is in stark contrast to the figure for Japan taking place as by far the most significant growth.

• 
  indexxxx.png
  

Writing Feedback / Music is a fundamental issue recently, since it offers enjoyment for a thousand people. IELTS 2 [5]

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Music is a fundamental issue recently, since it offers enjoyment for a thousand people. It is argued that kind of music as traditional song will give more benefits rather than International song. While it was lack of listener.

Mechanical sound is the most essential part of people live, and one of the major importance of music is a pleasure. It provides an enjoyable human entire their life, society uses music in order to relax and unwind at home, long journey and learning, as many people play music to gain concentration. It leads to this item use to diminish stress into society. The New York Times reported in March 2015 that music can make people more relaxed and minimize stress more than 30 percent, rather than people never hear music. For this reason, people who enjoy hearing music consistently will get many benefits in their life.

Connection with the sorts of music that is really important in society. Traditional music is the main valuable for people, as it brings many advantages indeed international music, while traditional music is an old fashion than global music, this music preserves civilization about history, and help societies remember their nationalism and cultural identity. The University Study For example, a recent study by Queen's University found that traditional music increase a number of feeling love to start at 40 percent in Junior high school. However, traditional music drives more bored for the listener.

To sum up, listening sort of music will help people unwind which influence human feeling, even though traditional and international music drive same benefit, the traditional gives more valuable as nationalism. I would suggest that society should filter every music that they hear, and they have to make creation with traditional music. as it makes this music still exist.

Writing Feedback / Many children in schools have recommended to study foreign languages at an earlier stage - IELTS 2 [2]

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school, do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Second language is an essential issue recently. It is argued that many children in schools have recommended to study foreign languages at an earlier stage , indeed they have been mature. Although this view will be a faster method to study a foreign language in primary school, others claim that young age does not have enough capacity of brain to conquer language.

Patently young children pick up languages much more easily than teenagers. Young child will be immediate to understand and remember entire worlds that is given to them, because the kid are enthusiastic to explore and to learn another language. For example, a recent study of Queen's University in Australia found that 70 percent of pupil in primary school can achieve their goal in second learning rather than secondary school just about 45 percent. However, teachers and parents did not have to enforce children to study foreign languages, as they have different problems.

In considering with language from abroad. Some people argue that small people is not ready to study the language when they come too early. It causes capacity of the brain is not appropriate to study new language. The result of this is young kid will get stress when parents force them to know complicated words. Take my brother as an illustration, he always enjoys with their own activities, even though my mother encourage to learn English by picture. It has proved that children have complicated to decide which language to speak.

To sum up, while children look faster to achieve foreign language when they are in elementary school, society has to know the precise part to encourage young kid, because they are not enough brain capacity. Where possible, I believe that the best way to educate people is by allowing them to choose what kind of activities they enjoy doing.