Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"It is not possible to eliminate poverty" [3]

Hi,

Request you to please correct my essay.

Do you agree with the following statement?
It is not possible to eliminate poverty.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

:Poverty is a very big problem in developing countries. Poverty is one of the most important reasons of keeping developing country from being a developed country. Poverty can be caused by three most common reasons: Population, Illiteracy and Corruption. I believe that, poverty can be reduced, if these problems will be solved.

To begin with, first reason of poverty is population. Increasing population is a very big problem in most of the developing countries like China, India. Increase in population creates scares of basic needs like food, cloth and shelter, and this results poverty. So, if population will be in control, then poverty can be reduced from country. To reduce the population of the country, government should run some schemes or programs like family planning, which will help to create awareness about disadvantages of poverty.

Second most important reason of poverty is illiteracy. Most of the over populated countries have these problems of poverty and illiteracy. Poor people cannot fulfill their basic needs, then how could they think about education. They spend most of their time to fulfill their basic needs. They also send their children to work instead of school, because of lack of income. This increases illiteracy in the country. There are various schemes of free education which are run by government to reduce illiteracy, but these schemes cannot reach up to the needed people, because of corruption which is third reason of poverty.

Last but not the least, corruption plays very important role in increase in poverty. Corruption is nothing but cheating with public. There are many leaders, politicians and higher posts people are included in corruption. And because of this, rich people are becoming richer and poor are becoming poorer which results increase in poverty. So, corruption should be stop to eliminate poverty.

Finally, I do not agree with the statement that, it is not possible to eliminate poverty, because as stated above, population, illiteracy, and corruption are three important reasons, which could help to eliminate poverty.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"It is important to know about current events.." [3]

Hi,

Do you agree or disagree with the following sentence.
It is important to know about the events happening in the world, even though it is unlikely to affect your daily life.
Making ourselves aware about current news in the world is the need of an hour. World is changing very fast. It is necessary to know about the events happening in the world. This helps us to find out what is good and what is bad for us. Knowing about current news helps us in many ways.

Firstly, as a student, taking current news is the part of my study, because general knowledge is the common subject of many competitive exams, entrance exams, and interviews. We have to be familiar with all the events happening around us. It is not only help in our study, but also in our personal life. For example, technology has developed a lot and is developing day by day. Daily new advanced technologies are introduced by inventors. We must have knowledge about these new inventions. Computer and internet is the best invention of the century. Knowledge about these helps us in our day to day life. For example, if we want to buy a new laptop and we know which one is best and advanced then, we can decide quickly which one to buy.

In addition, competition has increased a lot and is increasing day by day. It is necessary to get ourselves updated to stand in today's competitive world. Keeping knowledge about current news helps us to avoid mistakes. For example, Newspaper, Online news and TV news inform us about Global Warming. We can take care after knowing the dangerous effects of Global Warning. Like this, there are many other news which we can take from news and protect ourselves from dangers.

Finally, it is not possible to take all news from all over the world in today's fast paced world, but we can take the important ones. No matter, that is going to effect on our life or not. We should take these for knowledge.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay," Is daily homework necessary..?" [3]

Hi,

Many teachers assign homework to students every day. Do you think that daily homework is necessary for students? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

We all run away from homework. No one likes it, but I think it is necessary for students, because it teaches students to be a responsible person in their life. It also increases their confidence and interest in classroom activities. It helps students to understand quickly and perform well in classroom.

To begin with my first reason, homework teaches students to be a responsible person their life. If students complete their homework, then it shows their care and responsibility about studies. They learn to understand their responsibilities. They also learn to complete their work which is assigned to them instead of running away, which is very important for their career in future.

Secondly, homework helps students to increase their confidence and interest in classroom activities. For examples, a positive reply from teacher on homework done by student helps to motivate them. It increases their interest and they actively participate in classroom activities. This helps to develop their personality.

Thirdly, students learn to manage all their activities to complete the homework. They learn to take the proper use of time and do their work. This helps students to be disciplined in their life. Homework also helps students to understand quickly. For example, if a teacher gives homework of reading next chapter for the next class and students completed it by reading the next chapter, then it will help them to understand quickly because they already have read that chapter. They can easily ask questions and clear their problems. So, homework teaches students about time management and discipline.

Finally, I do agree with this that homework is boring, but it is essential to succeed in life. Homework allows students to review whatever they have learned in school on daily basis. This helps them to grasp quickly. So, everyday homework could play a vital role in student's life.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"A person should never make an important decision alone" [3]

Hi,

A short TOEFL essay. Please correct me and help me by suggesting some more examples.

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
A person should never make an important decision alone. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers.

Decision making is a very difficult task whether that is in our professional life or in personal life. We have to think every point of view to make a right decision. Decision making is depends on the situations. Some important decisions in our life should always be taken after discussing with our parents or closed ones. This will helps us to take a correct decision.

To begin with my first reason for this opinion, decision made after discussing with our closed ones or parents broaden our areas to think. This will help us to find pros and cons. For example, if in our office, we are working in one project as a team, then in such situation, we have to consider everyone's point of view to make a correct decision which will help us to perform well. So, discussion before taking any important decision can help us save us from taking wrong decision.

On the other hand, some decisions in our life, we have to take it alone. For example, decision of getting married with someone, this decision should be made alone. The person who wants to get marry is the one who can better decide about this than others.

Finally, it is depends on situations. Sometimes we have to take our decision alone and sometimes we have to discuss it with whom we trust. Many times, decision made alone can be considered as poor or wrong. So, where ever it is necessary, we should try not to take our decision alone because that can help us to take a correct decision.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"Earth is being harmed by human activities OR not..? " [2]

Hi,

Some people believe that, Earth is being harmed (damaged) by human activity. Others feel that human activity makes the Earth a better place to live. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Technological, Industrial, Scientific, Educational, and Transportation development made the Earth a better place to live, but it is also true that humans are the one who are damaging it by the activities which are disturbing nature causing environmental imbalances.

In early days, people's life was not as simple as today. Technological development made it possible to do many of human activities with the help of machines like computers. Internet and computers are the best technological development in the century. Development in science saves us from many dangerous diseases. Transportation development made it possible to move from one side of Earth to other. All these innovations and development by humans made the Earth a beautiful place to live.

On the other hand, humans are the one who are contributing to disturb the natural beauty on the Earth. Everywhere there are industries, complexes and buildings. Hardly, we can see open spaces and ground especially in Metropolitan cities. Nowadays, all small cities and towns are turning into big cities. These developments are good economically, but not environment point of view. Activities like destroying forests are removing greenery from the Earth. As a result, we can see the effects of Global warming. People are running after this economic development, but forgetting to protect environment which is harming the Earth.

Finally, human made the Earth a beautiful place to live, but they are only damaging it. Earth can be saved by taking care. If it will not be saved then, it can harm humans only. So, to save ourselves from dangerous effects of damages, we all need to protect the Earth.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay, "Can movies tell us about the country, where it is made...?" [3]

Hi,

Films can tell us a lot about the country where they were made. What have you learned about a country from watching its movies? Use specific examples and details to support your response.

Watching movies is one of the famous entertainment activities. Movies from Hollywood and Bollywood are famous all over the world. Movies made in a particular country can tell us about that country's custom and culture, language, arts and crafts, attractions, and about the development of that country. So, movie can provides knowledge about the country, where it is filmed.

To begin with my own example, before marriage I use to watch Bollywood movies only, but after some days I started watching Hollywood movies, because I knew that I had to move to another country after marriage. From Hollywood movies, I obtained the knowledge about customs and culture of the country. Language was the most important part which I learned from those movies. Earlier, I never understood English language, but now I can understand their accent and can also communicate with native people. They also asked me about my country, and are excited to know about my country. My suggestion has always been, to watch Bollywood movies to gain more knowledge about my country.

In addition, we can obtain knowledge about the different attractions and their importance in that country. Some movies are based on real stories from history. So, we get information about the history of that country. Sport is also another important part which we find in movies from that country. For example, I never knew about American football. I got knowledge about this game after watching movies. Hence, we can obtain information about the sports and history of the country by watching movies.

Finally, there are lots of things which we can learn from movies. Movies are the best option to obtain knowledge about that country, where it is made.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"Planning is better for free time activities OR not" [5]

Hi,

Some people prefer to plan activities for their free time very carefully. Others choose not to make any plans at all for their free time. Compare the benefits of planning free-time activities with the benefits of not making plans. Which do you prefer - planning or not planning for your leisure time? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.

Free time is the time which everyone likes to spend by doing their favorite activities such as, playing, watching movies and hanging out with friends. Planning plays important role to manage your activities without wasting time. Some people like to plan for their activities while others do not. Planning is not only important for our professional life but also in our personal life.

To begin with my first reason, planning helps to utilize our full time without wasting it. I like to plan my each and every activity. It helps me to finish my activities without wasting my time. It gives satisfactions that I have done it according to plan. For example, I like to spend my free time in outdoor activities such as, biking, boating, and kayaking, and many others which are close to nature. These are our weekend activities which I plan and make full use of our weekend. Planning not only saves our time but also money.

Secondly, planning helps me to make my activities more enjoyable. For example, if I want to hang out with my friends on coming weekend, I can plan by finding a correct place and time, and then ask my friends. If everyone will ready then we can enjoy it together. On the other hand, if we go without planning then we might waste our time by running here and there. This will spoil our mood. So, planning is important to make your activities more enjoyable and it will also save our energy.

Finally, it is not possible to plan our activities every time, but we can learn to manage our time by handling such situations. Therefore, I would prefer to plan my activities to save my time, energy and money.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"Success in life: Risk or Planning" [8]

Hi,

Please help me by checking my essay...thanks:)

Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Life is like a race and we all are running in that race to win. To win this race, running is important. If we do planning only and don't run then, that will not help us to win the race. By this way, careful action in any work in life is important, only planning cannot help to success in life. Proper planning with careful action can help us to success in life.

Firstly, taking risk can teach us new lessons in our life. This will give us new experience of learning new things, where we can find our strength and weaknesses. We can find our interest in that work or activity. This will help us to improve our skills and work on our weaknesses. This will not always results success but, failure is the first step to success so, we should learn to take risk in our life to find our strength and weaknesses

Secondly, taking risks can help us to find new ideas and opportunities in life. We can also make a profit by taking risks. For example, in share market, people take risk and carefully invest their money and luckily they earn profit out of that. Second example, while playing, many times players have to take risk to win the match, even if he knows that he could not do that moves. No matter, whether they win the match or not, but they will have satisfaction that they tried. So, failure could also be the result of risks, but that does not mean, we should stop taking risk and keep ourselves away from new ideas and opportunities.

Finally, not every time will get the time to think and plan, so by considering positive points of risk, I think, success comes by taking risks or chance.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"Influence of information available on internet" [3]

Hi,

Can anyone suggest me some more strong ideas about this topic...? I am not satisfied with mine.

The widespread use of the internet has given people access to information on a level never experienced before. How does this increase in the availability of information influence life in today's world.

Internet plays a vital role in today's fast paced world. It has made available worldwide information at one place. In ancient days, we had to go to the places to take out or find out some information but, today internet made it simple for us. Information available on internet has a great influence in our lives.

Internet has vast information available from which we have to find a correct and useful data. I remember, my brother was about to take admission for his masters after completing his bachelor's degree. There were no particular program was available at his place so he was searching from internet only. Internet made him easy to take his decision because, he could find out all available options then compare and decide where to go. So, information on internet has an amazing effect on my brother's career.

In addition, internet has made long distances short. It's very easy to access anyone can use it by following some simple instructions. We can search any kind of information by using search engine like Google. Nowadays, most of the work can be done online such as online banking, online shopping etc. Last month my husband wanted to buy insurance but he was confused which one to buy then he took out information of various insurance companies from internet; compared rates with other companies and then choose one after checking reviews. All was possible because of the availability of information on internet. In today's modern world, it is the best method of searching correct items and services.

Finally, internet has both kind of positive and negative information available. We have to decide which information is accurate and essential for us.

Thanks,
Ana.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL Essay,"It was easy in past to identify career or job" [2]

Hi,

I am submitting this essay after a long time please help me by checking and correcting this essay. Thanks.

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It was easier for people in the past to identify which type of career or job has a secure or successful future.
Use specific reasons and examples for your opinion.

Finding good job is a very difficult task in today's competitive world. This is because industrialization, privatization and globalization. In early days, there were limited options, people used to prefer jobs like government jobs or home business which are secure and spend their whole life by doing that jobs. So, it was simple in the past to choose our career.

Nowadays, Industrialization has brought drastic changes in job market. Increasing industries helped in the economic development of the country which has changed social life of people. Technological innovation has also brought a lot of changes in industrialization. All these changes have opened various opportunities for people so they started moving towards these new opportunities.

Privatization is another important factor which has made competition more strong. Privatization is nothing but the converting public sector into private sector. I remember, after completing graduation my family forced me to do government job only because most of my family members are in public sector and they think that public sector has a secure career but, I wanted to enter in private sector because private sector has more money and opportunities. In early days, when there was no privatization people did not have choices but, now they have and therefore they are turning from public sector to private sector.

In addition, globalization has made possible to connect with world. People started trading, communicating and exchanging products and services globally. This has opened new more opportunities on international level. So, people started moving overseas for such great opportunities. However, before all these, people could not even think to move from one city to another. It was difficult for them but, nowadays development in transportation has made it possible to move overseas.

Finally, competition has raised a lot and also increasing day by day. Sometimes, people cannot identify their career in this competitive world and get confused. Industrialization, privatization and globalization have made these competitions more strong so as compared to today's life it was really easy in the past to identify our career.

Thanks,
Ana.