Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:Shopping as a replacement of hobbies and other leisure activities. [7]

Hello forumers.Once again I am sharing my essay.Feedback and advice are always welcome.
I am fully aware that I have overused the word "shopping". I just don't have other means of replacing it.

TASK:Nowadays, many people go shopping in their free time. Shopping has replaced many other activities that people choose as their hobby. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

In today's world, more and more people love to go shopping. They enjoyed buying things not only for themselves but also for others. Thus, it has been preferred over other types of leisure activities and hobbies. Impacts of this development will be taken into consideration.

The perception of people on shopping has greatly evolved. In earlier times, people buy things such as food and clothing for the purpose of preparing supplies to be consumed in the coming days. Nowadays, they have considered shopping as a means of rewarding themselves for working hard. Furthermore, others tried to work hard to earn money for the things they want to buy. Shoppers claim that they felt so relaxed and contented whenever they go around malls and buy things. These perspectives leave other forms of leisure activity less appealing.

Consumers play an important role in a nation's economic industry. The growth of a country's economy greatly depends on how the market flows. If one vital component such as a consumer is not participating, the cycle will be broken. Thus, a country's financial status is deemed to be in trouble. Therefore the more people spend their money, the more chances their nation's economy will grow.

On the other hand, there are also undesirable results brought about by this development. Firstly, spending money or walking around supermarket and malls involves very less physical and mental activities. Undoubtedly, choosing it over hobbies like biking and hiking would mean a person's negligence to his own health. Secondly, there is a great tendency that most shoppers become materialistic. Their preferences are more inclined to brand names and signature items regardless of price. Moreover, these kinds of shoppers usually overspend causing them to be in major debt problems.

In a holistic approach shopping brings benefits to a society. However, looking at the impacts it can do to an individual's character, prioritizing shopping over other forms of leisure activity is regarded as a negative development.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:HOME-COOKED VS BUYING FOODS - which is better? [13]

Hi Friends. Once again I am sharing my work to you guys. Feel free to comment on it.

TASK:Some people say that cooking food at home is a waste of time. They claim that good restaurants are better and can make modern living easier and less stressful. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, the modernization of life has greatly influence the decisions of some people. In most cases, they choose something which is quick and convenient. Food preference is not an exception to this trend. These people claim that buying food is better than cooking one since it is easier and less stressful. Furthermore, they believe the latter is not time-efficient. I strongly agree to both statements.

In today's busy life, people find ordering food from restaurants very convenient for various reasons. Firstly, it merely involves looking at the menu and choosing the food only. They will not feel the hassle of reading through its recipe and knowing how to cook it. Secondly, some people like to eat but do not like to cook the type of cuisine they want. Thus, they are very happy with the provision of restaurants. Lastly, others want to dine in restaurants with relaxing ambiance. It helps them relieve the stress from work or build a rapport with their eating partner. In business oriented countries such as Hong Kong and Singapore, it is commonly observed that food centers and restaurants are more crowded compared to markets. Locals in these countries prefer to eat outside to socialize with friends and avoid the stress of preparing their food.

Apart from the advantages seen in buying food, it has been also said that home-cooked dishes are a waste of time. Numerous steps are involved to cook a meal at home. Initially, time needs to be spent in knowing and buying the essential ingredients. Besides that, tedious tasks also need to be done such as slicing the ingredients, doing the dishes, and cleaning the table. Overall, cooking is just not practical anymore. These days, people would rather save time to spare on working extra hours and doing their hobbies.

In conclusion, summing up the lifestyle people have in modern times, I believe that eating at restaurants is more suitable than preparing food at home. With so many other things to do and experience, people have little time and interest left for cooking.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:Young people becoming less respectful and polite these days [8]

Hi guys, I hope to gain some feedback from you on how to improve my writing.Thank you.

TASK:In some countries today young people are less respectful and polite to others. What could be the reasons behind such behavior? What can be done about it?

Society brings changes to the lifestyle and culture of an individual as it influences each and every person to become someone who is socially acceptable by the people around them. Nowadays, it is evident in some countries that the younger generation has become less respectful and polite towards others. Numerous reasons have been said as to which aspects in a society might have caused these changes.

First of all, most young people believe that the world is cruel because they perceive that being a good samaritan will invite more chances of being pushed around or bullied. Furthermore, it is said that parents who trains their children to practice politeness are ironically molding them to be weak members of the society in the future while the opposite yields future strong leaders. Thus, youngsters have resorted to become tough and rude individuals in order to survive in this type of environment.

Another reason is the influence brought about by peers and parents. As the saying goes, "tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are". Most juveniles have the tendency to think, dress and act like the people around them because they perceive it is the only way to blend in a group and be accepted. Naturally, if a young individual tags along a group of disrespectful friends, eventually he will have the same attitude sooner. Similarly, parents also have a great amount of influence to their children because they are looked up to as role models by the latter. Thus, every action and gesture seen in their parents are considered morally good.

Basing on the reasons shown, it is a fact that young people are persuaded to show less respect and kindness these days. However, these circumstances are not considered uncontrollable and unavoidable. Many solutions can be done to address these problems and one of them is the role portrayed by parents at home. Parents should continuously teach their children the importance of morale values and they should always guide them to become good members of the society in the future. In addition, parents should also be aware to the kind of friends their children are having, those who are bad influence should be avoided.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:Popularity of mobile phones to young people [7]

Hi Guys,

I appreciate if you can give feedback on my essay. Thank you.

TASK:Nowadays, many young people say that mobile phones are the most important thing in their life. Do you think the popularity of mobile phones to young people is a good or bad development? Give relevant examples from your own experience.

Nowadays, many young people consider mobile phone as the most important thing in their lives as it keeps them constantly organized and it provides much convenience for them to reach out their families and friends. Despite all these positive aspects, I think that the popularity of mobile phones to the young generation is a bad development.

First of all, many young owners of cellular phones are struggling at school because they are distracted most of the time with their phones. Games and applications installed in phones have occupied much of their time, leaving them lesser time for their studies and other school activities. Similarly, internet capable phones help influence the young ones to become more interested in chatting and social sites rather than doing school works. In my college days, I was once addicted to a certain game on my cellular phone. I have spent most of my time trying to reach a higher level to show-off to my friends. That goal has led me to my lost in interest on doing my homework and I ended up failing one subject in that semester.

Secondly, juveniles who possess mobile phones have great tendencies to become materialistic. They would not only purchase a phone because of its functionality but also for its brand. Relatively, these do not come at a significant and inexpensive cost. Furthermore, most of these juveniles are students so they would need their parents to support them financially for what they want. An illustration of this unfortunate trend can be seen almost everywhere these days, wherein most teens at an early age own phones which are worth twice the salary of their parents.

This clearly shows that the negative impacts brought about by mobile phones are harmful to a person's education and character. Therefore, I highly discourage the young ones to be overly dependent on mobile phones.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2:Teenagers encouraged to work part-time.Good or bad? [4]

Hi, as always I am looking forward to receive your feedback and suggestions...

TASK:In some countries, teenagers are encouraged to work part-time. Some people say this is good thing while others say it is bad. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is observed that young people in some countries are advised to gain experience through temporary jobs as it is beneficial not only to themselves but also to their families. On the contrary, others including myself regard this as undesirable since the negative impacts caused outweigh its positive impacts.

People in favor to this practice claim that, allowing individuals to experience and feel being in a working environment at an early age would give them a better perspective on what they would want for their future career. Furthermore, being able to discover and learn one's skills earlier would give them enough time to develop it. Other than that, the money they will earn would be a great help to support their financial needs while studying.

However, there are some who oppose to this idea because it imposes a grave threat to a person's education. Teenagers tend to be complacent whenever they experience financial independence from their parents. Thus, usually situations end up having them disregard the importance of education. Aside from that, having a part-time job causes delay in one's education since time needs to be divided for work and studies. Students who want to have an ideal load at school while having a job are bound to receive lower grades as a result.

In my opinion, at a teenager level, one's primary focus should be schooling. If a person has the necessary resources to support himself in being a full-time student then he should not allow any disruption to finish his course as early as possible. It is undeniable that having a part-time job brings good things but since it is harmful to a person's education then I am strongly against it.