Writing Feedback / Adolescents should be taught to compete, since this brings a decision maker skills for their future [3]

Some people think that a sense of competition children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are thought to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give own opinion.

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In general, adolescents should be taught to compete, since this brings such as a better decision maker for their future. However, it is believed that children are more likely to be useful persons such as good relationship in their adult age, if children are given a co-operation learning.

Apparently a strong competition leads children to be a great person. It is true due to the fact that this method is going to drive them to be a good decision maker. A 2009 recent Australian National University research showed 90% of pupils in Toronto, Canada were required to join in minimal five national competitions. This regulation should be done before students graduated from the second level education. As a result of this, most students who were working in a company clearly took a brief decision when they faced a problem. From this, competition among children is child needs.

In contrast, children are taught to co-operate seem to have better relationship, as long as they learn how to socialize to other people around them. In addition, co-operative children are able to know about other character and psychology people, inasmuch as they always meet and share with different friends. Finally, children could control their emotion when they have a problem, since they used to seat together with different people.

In conclusion, although children who are thought about co-operation bring huge benefits in the next time, it is believed that children provided encouragement of competition are more likely to be useful in their adult age. Where possible, it is better to mix these principal methods, since these bring merit in both.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: The charts below show household spending patterns in two countries between 1980 & 2008 [NEW]

The breakdown of the proportion of patterns' household spending in UK and New Zealand from 1980 to 2008, a 28 - year period is presented in the pie charts. Overall, the patterns of household spending are dissimilar in both countries. In any case, while patterns of spending utility bills increased slightly, the figure for food and beverage experienced a gradual fall in both the countries.

To begin, 1980 had showed a slight increase in household spending of UK, from 27% to 34% in 2008. In addition, this case also occurred in the figure for utility bills of both countries. At 26%, the percentage of household spending' UK mounted gradually to 28%, and there was a steady rise of the same subject in New Zealand from over a quarter to almost a third of household spending in the second period.

In contrast, there was a sharp fall of spending's household in UK from 23% to 13%. This term is the same as did New Zealand, with falling four percent by twenty-five percent. In addition, spending of transport in the two countries witnessed one-percent drop by 14% and 16% irrespectively in UK and the other one. 1980 to 2008 saw a gradual decrease of percentage' spending leisure in New Zealand. The remaining figure solely dropped slightly.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : the proportion of changes in students graduated from universities in Canadian [2]

A breakdown of the proportion of changes in students graduated from universities in eight dissimilar provinces in Canada from 2001 to 2006, a five-year period is presented in the bar chart. Overall, it is clearly seen that the percentage of international-student graduates in 2006 were higher than the other one. In any case, although student graduates in Alberta province was dominated in 2001, the other provinces experienced a reserve.

To begin, graduate numbers in some provinces reached over eight percent, and the proportion of graduates in 2006 always surpassed the year of 2001. International graduates in New Brunswick witnessed the greatest number of students at approximately 12% of proportion, figure for nova Scotia graduates experienced virtually the same proportion as it was in British Columbia at about 10%, while Quebec international graduates was at nearly nine percent. In contrast, 2001 experienced under eight percent of the number of graduates in the four provinces.

A more detail look at the graph reveals that the remaining figures showed proportions of international-student graduates were at around six percent. There was a similar percentage of the number of graduates between Manibota and Newfoundland province at virtually seven percent and three percent respectively in 2006 and 2001. Astonishingly, Alberta graduates were higher in 2001 (around 6%) than 2006 (around 4%).

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Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 : A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland [3]

A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland is presented in the diagram. Overall, it is clearly seen that time by time the headland gradually disappears, and the process continues for some natural steps without any affection of human.

To begin, beneath the base of the headland, there are weak areas, hollow lands caused by erosion, which is like a small cave. After that, the hollow land becomes huger, so the cave turns arch, where it is possibly shaped like Durdle, door, or Dorset. After the sea water beats against the hollow lands for long time, the roof of the headland disappears, and it gets wicker and wicker.

Following that, after being eroded, the stack area is separated from the headland. Whereas a frequency of water pressure causes a powerless area. Eventually, the roof of the separated land retreats, which effects virtually a half of the size lost. Consequently, the stack land falls into the sea, and creates stump.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 : It is pointless making children who lack artistic talent learn painting and drawing [2]

It is pointless making children who lack artistic talent learn painting and drawing in Art classes at school. Instead, they should concentrate on other creative or practical subjects for which they may have more aptitude.

To what extend do you agree or disagree.

It is true that pupils who are learning painting and drawing without having many skills or art talents is useless. Some people argue that encouraging students to switch those non-academic subjects to subjects which they have aptitude in is needed most. That is true since students are able to maximize their working. However, I believe that skills of art could be developed during the learning process.

To begin, most student will render excellent result for their work, if they have more aptitude about that. It is because they feel never bored and always love their subject. A 2014 recent study from Melbourne university have shown that children in girl primary and secondary school Perth, Australia easily mastered and learned fast for their mathematics major, after they rejected art subject and chose the mathematics. As a result, in the future, they will have a range of job opportunities, as most company requires specific skill. From this, an interesting subject can create more value.

On the other hand, pupils who is lack skills of painting and drawing should be encourage to continue learn more, since they are able to obtain the talent over the process of the study. It is absolutely right, as children are naturally creative thinking, and they belong to high logic. A report by the Arts Education Partnership in 2002 revealed that schoolchildren exposed to painting art are often more proficient at reading, writing, and math. Consequently, they have more preparation for the future.

In conclusion, although changing intent to other subjects brings merits, children should account for art major, because it drives them more skilled. Where possible, serious consequences should be taken into consideration.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 : DEVELOPMENT OF TECHNOLOGY TO A NEW LIFESTYLE. [2]

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace (e.g. at home, when traveling, etc.)
Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?
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Technology is changing people habit. Development of information technology has influenced society lifestyles by working outside of their workplace. This case brings benefits, since this leads to efficient time consuming and more pleasure. Although both ideas are utterly acceptable to some extent, I would argue that there must be serious a consequence especially unhealthy lifestyle.

Apparently due to development of information technology, it comes to an abrupt withdrawal of lack of activity. This is because there seems to be a busy with heavy workloads. A 2004 recent Harvard university study reveals that 90% of employees working at home in Zamfara, Nigeria have obesity, since they does not spend energy and their muscle is not exercised properly. Besides that, the workers get minimal calorie expenditure. It is clear that effects of healthy are often seen in sedentary activity.

Despite the drawbacks, we cannot deny that technology has made many aspects of life more efficient time. People who work in international business have to replay hundreds of emails every day, and people can spend gather with their family. Some people argue that this time could be better spend.

It is more pleasure using technology information at working home. This is owing to the fact that people have instant access to entertainment and social connection just a click away. Like many people, I use a networking site, which apparently has more than 700 million active users. This type of statistic illustrates just how popular this website is.

The aforementioned evidence shows that the immense benefits of information technology of working in non-workplace has offered pleasant and efficiency of time. However, it is argued that this activity leads people serious disease. As seen, both views introduce merits and demerits. It is imperative that societies should take regular breaks from their computers, so there are benefits that remain.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : The average spending figure for cell phones from 2001 to 2010 [2]

Hai, here are two my essays of IELTS task1. I am really keen on waiting your suggest and comment.

The first graph :

A breakdown of the number of average annually spending on mobile and landline phones by American costumers from 2001 to 2010, a nine- year period is presented in the line chart.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that there was a big changes in the final period. In any case, although cell expenditures of phone service showed the lowest in the first year, this figure rose sharply in the last year by surpassing the level of residential phone service in the middle of period.

To begin, there is a big different of both figures between the first and the final years. The average spending figure for cell phones in 2001 stood at about $200, while for residential phone services was approximately $700, which is difference $500 expending. In contrast, 2010 experienced a reverse. There was a significant fall in level of average expenditures of residential phone service by virtually $400. On the other hand, the other figure boosted dramatically to just under $800, which is different $500 average expenditures, and reached a high of the annual expenditures over period.

Next, there was a surpassing in the middle of period. Between 2001 and 2006, the figure for cell phone costs witnessed a slight decrease, while the residential phone users fell markedly. Astonishingly, the former surpassed the later in 2006.

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  the first graph
  

Writing Feedback / Extinction: less and less species from plant and animal tropical forest - IELTS TASK 1 [NEW]

A breakdown of the number of extinctions species from plant and animal tropical forest per decade between 2000 and 2100 as a projected year, a 100-year period is presented in the line chart. On the other hand, the bar charts compares threats of plant life by human impact and natural events.

Overall, it can be seen that the number of extinction species will reach a peak, after that this decreases slightly, while the plant threats are dominated by human impact. In any case, the number of plant and animal extinctions decreased are caused more by human intervention than natural events.

To begin, extinctions of plant and animal in tropical forest stand at 5,000 million species. Over the following six forecast decades, this rises dramatically and reaches a high of 50,000 million species. After a peak, the figure is overseen to fall until the final period by 30,000 million species.

Next, plant life has its threat from two main resources: human impact and natural events. The most serious damage was caused by human at 81.3%, while natural even witnesses at just 18,7%. Specifically, the same exact percentage (18,7%) happened for agricultural events, the highest percentage of human impact. On the other hand, 7 per cent natural disaster and 11.7 per cent other natural events offered for natural events.

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Writing Feedback / Diagram shows that the percentage of people aged 65 and more is predicted to increase [2]

A breakdown of the proportion of elderly people from 1940 to 2040 as a forecast year, a 100-period year is presented in the line chart. The data is carried out from USA, Sweden, and Japan.

Overall, it is clearly seen that the percentage of people aged 65 and more is predicted to increase. In any case, although figure the number of people aged 65 or more in Japan experienced the lowest one in the first year, this figure is overseen to surpass and becomes the greatest one.

To begin, there was a huge changes between the first and the last view year. 1940 showed that all of the figure stood at just under 10%, which Japan societies was the least. On the other hand, all of the levels increased significantly and showed a reserve. The percentage of USA inhabitants witnessed the lowest one at approximately 23%, while figure for Japan reached a high of virtually 27%. the level of more-or-65-aged-Sweden population was between them.

Next, there was were an increasing and surpassing in the middle year. From 1960 to 2020, both the ageing population in USA and Sweden mounted slightly but fluctuated, while the level of Japan fell gradually but surpassed the other ones in 2030.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 : Observation of automobiles number owned by British people from 1971 to 2007 [2]

A breakdown of the number of car per household in great Britain from 1971 to 2007, a 36-year period is presented in the line chart.

Overall, it can be seen that car ownership in Britain increased between over the year. In any case, although the proportion of households with two cars mounted slightly, the number of citizens without a car decreased.

More specifically, nearly half of a large majority of British households did not have regular use of a car. About 7% of households had two cars, yet solely around 44% belong to one car. At 2%, households with three or more cars, because this was uncommon for the number of families to own the numbers.

Next, households with one car was the most common type from the late 1970's onwards, while this figure witnessed little change. The considerably change was seen in the percentage of households belong to one car, while this level decreased gradually over the period to approximately a quarter percent in the last year. Astonishingly, the two-car households experienced a steady growth, reaching about 26% in 2007, and the proportion of households with more than two cars rose by around 5%.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 : Today's issue is a technology addiction. [2]

QUESTION : Over reliance on modern technology means that people are falling to learn, or more forgetting, many basic skills.
To what extent is this true? Are people becoming so reliant on modern technology that they are no longer able to do some things without it?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Today's issue is a technology addict. Over the last 50 years, to use of computer technology has been increasing in modern society. Almost everything is done with a help of a modern technology, so people are less likely to want to learn or carry out the same thing. This is utterly true, since technology brings human to automatic and instant lifestyle. Yet, I would disagree, because this reliance Encourages innovation and creativity.

Apparently modern technology drives people more enjoyable, since they are influenced by automation and instance of modern technology. For instance, mobile phone has been used by someone to communicate each other 24 hours a day, so that he need not visit someone who is talking with. Just imagine, if he goes there, it will spend much time, power, and money. As a result, people are capable of conducting other activities. From this, It is clear that the way of people live look simple by modern technology.

However, some argue that thanks to reliance on development of technology, human can make more innovation and creativity. Since technology is challenging, it sparks the brain to work to its full potential. In the past, it used to be very difficult to start a business, one had to have lots of capital and they even had limited access to business information. Today, it is very easy to start a business while at home. For example, kickstarter.com which helps creative people get funds for their projects through crowd funding. On this platform, creative developers post projects seeking for funding from the community, this helps them generate lots of cash for their good ideas which latter leads to creation of new Jobs.

The aforementioned evidence shows that modern technology makes everything instant. In addition, it is stated that more innovation and creativity will be created easily. As seen, both views introduce merits and demerits. It is imperative that other consequences should be taken into consideration.