Writing Feedback / The multi-stage process of creating a coffee (Task 2) [2]

The diagram reveals that the process of making coffee through different stages. It is started with selecting of coffee beans from field and ended when the coffee is ready to be packed into jars.

What stands out from the process diagram illustrates 11 stages. First, the beans of coffee is harvested by several labours on the morning. Then, the selected beans are dried in the yard until make sure the beans are ready prior to roasted. After that, the process of cooling quickly is needed before going to the next step of grinding manually. This produces the powder of coffee. Afterwards, it is mixed with the hot water and filter the mixture. Furthermore, it is followed by a freezing process.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, the next stage is the procedure of re-drying in a vacuum. By this, water which included in the powder will be separated by the high temperature. Finally, the coffee powder is prepared to be packaging and labelling before sending to market.

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Writing Feedback / Spendings on six consumer goods and the number of internet users [NEW]

A chart:
A breakdown of the amount of Europe people in spending money for six commodities and is measured in thousand pounds sterling is illustrated by the chart. Overall, British inhabitants spent more money for buying stuff, while Germans solely spent less one.

As is given in the bar chart, British citizens are more likely to expense all consumer goods. This is proved by the data that they spent more than £170,000 for photographic film which this is a highest consumption than other countries, then this trend is followed by toys, CDs, and perfumes which British spent on that goods over £160,000.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, France as the second biggest spending money in film of photographic and CDs. That showed at £167,000 and £158,000 in series. However, in other goods like perfumes, tennis racquets and personal stereo, the citizens' consumption in France became number third after British and Italian.

Interestingly, Germans always be economic in all aspects by noticed the lowest of buying products.

A line graph:
A breakdown of the proportion of people who access the internet in three countries, namely the USA, Canada and Mexico following a ten-year period is illustrated by the line graph. Overall, the figure for internet users in Canada growth significantly and this beats others.

As it mentioned on the graph, most inhabitants in all countries are more likely to be on-line. This is proved by the data that in the beginning period, in 1999, the percentage of population using the internet in USA was in 20%, while the proportion in Canada and Mexico showed lower, at around 10% and 5% respectively. Interestingly, in 2005, internet usage in the USA and Canada experienced the same percentages approximately 70%, while the figure for users in Mexico still under 30%.

However, in the last period of 2009, the statistics of internet usage in Mexico solely reach the maximum point at 40%. On the other hand, the number of using internet in Canada become the highest which almost 100%, while the figure for users in the USA at 80%.

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Writing Feedback / Real estate market in five big cities & a plan of building a supermarket in some town [NEW]

I presented two writing tasks 1, please give correction on my passages.
Thanks

First Graph :
A comparison of the proportion of changes prices in five cities over following a twelve-year period between 1990 and 2002 with the price on 1989 is presented by the graph. As is observed that a decline of average cost in New York, Tokyo and London since 1990 until 1995. On the other hand, the average value in New York, Madrid and London increased for six years from 1996 to 2002.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, there are several changes of house price in several cities in the last ten years. Then, the significant boost occurred in New York and London by 10% and 20% respectively. From 1990 to 1995 in Madrid and Frankfurt noticed the similar worth at 2 percent. Interestingly, solely the value in Madrid where mount to 4 percent, while the house' value in Frankfurt saw stagnant.

However, although almost all regions showed an increasing of house's expense, the price in Tokyo only rose gradually by 3% from -8 to -5 percent.

A map:
The map describes regarding planning of constructing supermarket in Garlsdon town. As it presented in the illustration that this city has population around 65 thousand. Then, two possibilities will be applied, building near Hindon or in the middle of town centre.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, the railway take a cross in all villages and pass town centre which still no traffic. Furthermore, the first probability of building supermarket (S1) is in near Hindon with the approximately 10,000 inhabitants. Yet, this planning will bring side effect to other villages where the citizens from Bransdon and Cransdon go too far to reach it.

Moreover, Town centre becomes the main area where all of roads link to other cities. So that, here becomes the second possibilities which in this place will be constructed a supermarket (S2). Although there is no village where near with the town centre, it will be advantage for all.

To conclude, the second choice will be the best one since a supermarket is located among the industrial areas and correlate to all regions.

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Writing Feedback / Task 2 - The coherence of technology and basic skills [2]

Over-reliance on modern technology means that people are failing to learn, or are forgetting many basic skills.
To what extent this is true? Are people becoming so reliant on modern technology that they are no longer able to do some things without it?

In the modern era, most people cannot get rid of technology. This brings effects to several inhabitants who they fail in the basic skills since they feel be easy with sophisticated device. While, this is true, I strongly believe that the technology can improve the skills of people. Yet, all depend on their personality.

Technology is more likely to intervene in humans' problems. In this case, they feel comfortable if they can correlate to. Yet, this can lessen the capability of people who still in the first studying. As example, juveniles who still in processing to study mathematic, and they use calculator for helping them solve the math questions. This is a severe action because actually citizens cannot blame the calculator as the main issue formation of fundamental skills. In order to, the superintendence of elderly people is vital.

Nevertheless, individuals use technology for solving their assignments. This is caused they state that technology has been a part of their necessity. But, in fact this statement is reverse. A recent study by Stanford University illustrates that average human being always check their smartphone every 6 minutes and they prefer to access it than sleep. This affects to the time for studying which they tend to be more focus on their entertainment. They should be able to separate the time between learning and playing.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that technology has spread in all aspects even in the education. On the other hand, I reckon this is not threaten to the elementary skills. Indeed, they can improve their abilities and insight with sophisticated devices.

Writing Feedback / A comparison of the consumer expenses on several commodities in five countries in 2002 - IELTS 1 [NEW]

A comparison of the consumer expenses on several commodities in five countries in 2002 is illustrated by the table. Overall, the inhabitants are more likely to buy food, drinks and tobacco. This is showed by the high average proportion. In contrast with the percentage of leisure or education sectors experienced lowest number.

From five countries, two of them Ireland and Turkey saw the highest percentages food-stuff aspects with each 28.91% and 32.14% respectively. Then, the proportion of leisure/education in Turkey also experienced the greatest number in 4.35%, while the best rate of clothing/footwear is in the Italy with 9%.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, Sweden had been the lowest number in food and clothing sectors nearly 16% and around 5% in series. Furthermore, Spain noticed in the middle proportion for this aspect under 19 and 7 per cent, yet it became the lowest number in leisure/education with solely 1.98 per cent.

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Writing Feedback / The information regarding the inhabitants who have cars in Britain over the 36 year timeline [2]

A breakdown of the information regarding the inhabitants who have cars in Britain over following a period of 36 years between 1971 and 2007. Overall, the proportion of two cars owner experienced a significant increase, while the percentage of household without car fell dramatically.

In the beginning era, virtually a half of citizens with no car. This is proved with the data stood at 47%, while the rate of people who have one car noticed stable around 43%. Then, figure for mankind with two cars solely in 7%. Furthermore, rich human with uncommon condition by having three cars or more showed in 2%.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, the Britain people are more likely to own one car. This is showed with the movement slightly in high percentages over all periods. The hugest change was in the percentage of individuals without car by 25% from 47% to 22%, while the rate of owning two cars rose steadily approximately 20%. In addition, the proportion of Britain with three or more cars increased steadily around 5 per cent.

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Writing Feedback / Task 1 - How the weather information is collected by Australian Bureau of Meteorology [2]

The diagram illustrates how the weather information collected by Australian Bureau of Meteorology before being broadcasted to the society. Based on the data, three kinds of sophisticated devices which are used to collect the up-to-date information, namely satellite, radar and drifting buoy.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, satellite technology offers photos globally include analysing and forecasting while radar is observed to radar screen which is gained from the inhabitants' houses. In addition, drifting buoy is the equipment which is placed on the sea. It works with sharing information regarding the recent condition in a form of synoptic chart. Officially, all of sources are processed by the main server or computer prior to broadcasting.

Consequently, the climate information should be accurate thanks to comparing 3 sources. Furthermore, the data is presented by various devices like television, radio and recorded telephone announcement. So that, the information will be accepted by the Australians and they know what the weather forecast.

Writing Feedback / Task 1 - Our society is getting older and older. The percentage of elderly people rises rapidly. [NEW]

A breakdown of the percentages of population of elderly people aged 65 and more as long as a hundred-year period from 1940 to 2040 as the prediction year in the USA, Sweden and Japan is presented by a line chart. Overall, although Japan's older inhabitants least in beginning, this is predicted to increase pass all countries in the next a quarter decade.

There are the similarities and differences population among three countries. The number of elderly human in Japan stood at 5%, approximately 7% in Sweden and in the USA at 9%. The rate of citizens in the USA and Sweden experienced the same pattern since 1940 until 1990. However, the figure for older ones in Japan indeed drop slightly to 3 percent. This trend had continued around 25 years later between 1960 and 1985.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, the population in Japan noticed an extreme rise in the last two a half decades, even this trend passed the final prediction of total old people in the USA and Sweden in 2040 which each at 23% and 23% respectively.

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Writing Feedback / The scientists continually make an endeavour to achieve a life in outer space. [3]

Some people argue that space exploration has had more to do with national pride than national effort.
To what extent do you agree with this?
How do you think space exploration will change in the future?

In the globalisation era, the development of technology has spread in all aspects. One of them is in the space exploration. Some people believe that with this mission, it can make a nation proud of. Because of that, this needs great effort to prove it. In my view, I strongly agree that in the next future a space journey become prominent.

Furthermore, the inhabitants who know the technology. They will search novel methods to break the limit. As example, a new discovery of space travelling to the moon which done in July 21, 1969 by three Americans. This is proved that the USA has an immense ambitions of special purpose. From that moment, the USA had been a superpower country since it showed the different performance and become fame state.

Nevertheless, all that inseparable from the country which included in the project. Aerospace organizations contains people all over the world. On account of this, Americas cannot claim that they commit their experiments clearly base on their struggle. In addition, regarding the financial aspects, this project needs much cost and requires loan of money from other countries. The nations which helped this invention should be appreciated and become famous as well.

For several years later, in my point of view the travelling of outer space is predicted become the extraordinary one because until present, solely few of inhabitants who can go there. For instance, only 3 Americans, namely Niel Amstrong, Buzz Aldrin, and Michael Collins in 1969 then, this was followed by Russia in 4 years later. This is because for this project requires high financial and much time for preparation.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that although space exploration is difficult journey for people now, the scientists continually make an endeavour to achieve a life in outer space. Then, in next several decades, the era is predicted to face outer travelling.

Writing Feedback / Task 1 - Information about plant and animals extinctions and the treats to plant life [NEW]

A comparison of the endangered plant and animal species in tropical forests over following a century between 2000 and 2100, is measured by per million species per decade and this is illustrated by the graph while, the chart describes regarding the factors which threaten plant life and is gauged by the percentages. Overall, a decrease number is predicted in the last four-decade period since the behaviour of human plays the vital impact based on the data.

First in all, a significant increase of the number species occurs for a half decade later. This is proved that in 2000, the rate of extinction flora and fauna stood at 5,000 in millions. Then, the trend always rise significantly until reach a peak by tenfold in 2,060. Suddenly, this decrease extremely approximately under 30,000 in the last year.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, although the natural events influence to the threating creatures, the immense aspect which affect is human being factors. The natural incidents like disasters solely causes around a quarter in extinction. Furthermore, the agriculture, harvesting and development have the high proportion in people activities with each 18.7%, 14.4%, and 10.4% respectively.

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Writing Feedback / Task 1 - The process of honeybee's life [2]

The cycle graph reveals the process of honeybee's life. Overall, six steps has been applied for this case. Even more true, all of steps need time for a cycling around 34 to 36 days.

In the beginning, the life process of honeybee is started with insects' females lay eggs approximately 1 or two for every three days. Then, the eggs are predicted to hatch after waiting between 9 and 10 days. There are three phase which for each need a week. The honeybee need 5 days to adapt in the environment. Moreover, the process before becoming adult namely nymph molting which it occurs three times in 2 weeks.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, a phase is held in a process before maturity. This process is the emerging of young adults which this happens solely for 4 days prior to be adult perfectly. Afterwards, the insects will lay egg again, so anything beyond for the next 5 weeks.

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Writing Feedback / A comparison of the trade in two kinds of phone product, namely mobile and residential [2]

A comparison of the trade in two kinds of phone product, namely mobile and residential one in a nine-year period from 2001 to 2010 in the US and this is presented by the a line chart. Overall, it is noticeable that the amount of money which spend for cell phones always increase every year, while another for landline phone experienced conversely.

There were significant changes between selling both commodities. In the beginning year, the price of cell phone stood at $200 and for home phone is more than threefold in $700. But then, the rate of hand-phone noticed a dramatic increase to $300, while the value of house-phone showed a dramatic fall by $80. This condition lasted for a four-year later.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, the line chart described the interesting trend in last five-year period. This is because the lines intersected in 2006, exactly in $550, but the trend of residential telephone described a worse trend since the rise number of users in cell phone. Then, over following the four years later, both lines showed the slight movement until the expense of mobile phone reached a peak at $750 and the price of landline ring dropped to $400.

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Writing Feedback / Humankind can work from everywhere without coming to the workplace. Task 2 [3]

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace (e.g. at home, when travelling, etc.)
Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?

In the modern era, information technology has the prominent role. It can alter the way of labour commit their job. It is utterly true that this brings several benefits like people are able to know the recent condition of working field and it very useful for educational children to gain the up-to-date information regarding the insight. Yet, technology has miserable impacts to people who access it such individualism and unhealthy lifestyle.

One of the main merits which affected by information technology is that humankind can work from everywhere without coming to the workplace. This is because they can control their information from their sophisticated devices. Then, they will know the movement of stock and commodity exchange while, they are in the irritating situation such in traffic congestion.

The other benefits are applied to the students, they are more likely to search the information by using the technology like the internet. With this, they can find the notion by clicking the keyword on the search engine website. Google as example, students who want to study English, they will get many methods on that site. In this case, they do not need any more to come to the library.

Nevertheless, technology as well as influence people particularly in the unhealthy lifestyle. First, the evolving of technology make the inhabitants become individualism because of addicting in front of screen. This is affected because they solely communicate in the virtual world so, they do not care about the around environment. Furthermore, people who sit for many hours for accessing the computer will have a particular disease like diabetes. This is because they rarely move and usually they operate the computer accompanied by snacks. So, to solve it may be they need to carry out exercise for several minutes.

The aforementioned evidence reveals that although the technology of information has some negative impacts to the society, the citizens cannot get rid of it. The reason of this, technology make them easily to manage their jobs.

Writing Feedback / Information Technology brings prominent aspect to the society's life but it cause also addictions [2]

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities.
To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?

Technology of information brings prominent aspect to the society's life and this affect them become addict of it. Then, it occurs in several bustles such in house, spare and working. Although it has influenced us in human's activities, I strongly believe that it has severe effect to a half of people.

One of the main problem which affected by information technology is that humankind will spend much time to operate their gadget which is correlated to. A wide range of workers read many emails and youngsters are more likely to surf on the internet for along time. In this case, it is argued that they may be able to use the better time for other tasks.

Then, the technology can make people have unhealthy lifestyle. This is a true statement for some and they actually should take the exercise. As example, the employees who work in the office sure they will sit in front of their sophisticated device like computer for hours. If they commit this until years, cannot be denied they will get a particular disease.

Despites these demerits, the most inhabitants cannot get rid of the technology since it makes them easily to access the information. With the internet connection, by clicking and type the keyword on the search engine website, they will know what they search solely in several seconds. For instance, if the human being wants to gain the recent news, they just type it like the last condition in Paris. Afterward, a huge of websites will be appeared and ready to access.

Furthermore, another merits of accessing technology can be applied to work. For business labour, the network in the office which is connected to the internet, it can be useful for sharing data. As example, the workers in other places can open the source data from a company although they do not operate the same personal computer.

The aforementioned evidence shows that although there are drawback which is caused by the technology, the surplus of it is more. For this, people do not ignore the impacts of technology information.

Writing Feedback / Task 2 - The influence colour according to the psychologists [3]

Q : Psychologist have known for many years that colour can affect how people feel. For this reason, attention should be given to the colour schemes when decorating places such as offices and hospitals.

How true is this statement?
How far does colour influence people's health and capacity for work?

Colour has prominent role in designing. Some psychologists believe that applying colour can influence the mood of citizens. Because of this, using colour has to appropriate in several decoration of buildings like offices and hospitals. In this case, I strongly believe that imposing suitable colour in the office can reduce the stress level of workers, as well as in hospital. In addition, it can encourages patients to become healthier.

In the beginning, stress due to the work environment. Stress work which is too long will affect to physical and psychological health problems. A 2013 recent study from Angela Wright, a fame psychologists, states that using red dye in work place seems to be emotional to workers since it leads to psychological welfare as emotional. In addition, the level of working pressure is heavily influenced by the uncomfortable environment. Then, staining on the walls in workspace should use soft colours.

Furthermore, a wide range of hospital's managers reckon that healthy recovery can only be done by a medical way. Yet, a half of people state that this is false statement because dying can influence the patient's health. For instance, applying white can create a sense of peace or the green can bring the calmness. Moreover, the interior of hospitals have a significant effect on the comfortable of patients' healing process. The right approach of interior can reduce stress and scary experienced by the patients.

The aforementioned evidence shows that although the comfortable office can be created by colouring and decorating room, this also applied in the hospitals where with hoping it can alleviate the level of stress and fear feeling.

Writing Feedback / Task 1 - Summarize the impact of erosion of a headland [2]

Q : The diagram below shows the stages in the erosion of a headland. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram describes several processes regarding erosion which is affected to a headland. Overall, although the waves always hit cliff, the coastline experiences a stable condition.

To begin, the headland is constructed with two holes which are located in weak areas. Then, the immense orifice becomes larger than before. After taking very long time process, the arch is formed. This is because the waves strike the cave. As example, the extreme erosion occurred in Durdle Door, Dorset where the precipice is smashed by extremely strong waves.

Furthermore, the crack on the rock becomes wider and this crashes the hollow. Meanwhile, the power of water has separated it as two parts after damaging the roof position. What is more, the cuttings are collected beside it. Eventually, the separated headland shot to pieces, most stumps fell to sea. Afterwards, a novel hole is created. This hole is predicted to destroy the hollow slightly.

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Writing Feedback / The proportion alter in the rate of overseas university students in several regions in Canada [NEW]

Task 1 - The percentage change in the number of Canada's international students

The bar chart reveals the proportion alter in the rate of overseas university students in several regions in Canada over following a five-year period from 2001 to 2006. Overall, although most province occurred a rise in the total of international academic pupils, Alberta's zone instead experienced in decreasing number 5 year later.

Based on the data, the total of graduates in several countries had similar pattern exception the figure for international graduates in Alberta and British Columbia. There were three areas where saw a dominant percentage over 10% in 2006, namely New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and British Columbia. Yet, in the beginning of year, meanwhile they witnessed a slight number approximately 7 per cent besides the number of British Columbia's students dropped sharply to 5 per cent. Interestingly, it was the same proportion as Alberta's number in 2006.

A more detailed analysis look at the graph reveals that other provinces such Manitoba, Ontario, Newfoundland and Labrador had similar ways which in 2001, they solely stood at under 4% and increased above 6%.

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Writing Feedback / Task 2 - A pet bring best, helpful and happiness [3]

Pets not only can be our best and helpful friends but they also bring happiness for us.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, some people tend to have a pet in their house. The function of animal is not solely as a friend, yet it can change family's situation become happier. This bring demerits to the owner who is predicted to spend more money to keep the pet. In this case, I strongly agree if a pet makes some citizens become relax, they have to purchase it.

First of all, it is true that pets are the best companion and being more satisfaction to people.maintaining pets is chosen by several inhabitants because they feel better if there is a funny animal such a cat or a dog in their sweet home. This reason is make a sense since a 2004 recent Curtin University revealed that having a pet in home can reduce the family's stress up to 70%. This is because a pet can make members of family smile or laugh. Therefore, owning an amusing pet is prominent for some people.

Furthermore, if individuals decide to have a pet, they have to prepare their budget. It can be seen that the price of maintaining a dog or a cat is expensive. For instance, for foraging, they have to buy special food in the animal's store and they need to buy medicine if their pets get disease. This is acceptable as they will gain satisfying from their cute animals, so it is no problem if just spending money to purchase it.

The aforementioned evidence shows that an animal is not only a friend, yet it also as a family's member. Experienced, people must treat it as well as possible.

Writing Feedback / Task 1 - The amount of waste production in six countries. [3]

A breakdown of the rate of waste production in different regions over following a twenty-year period between 1980 and 2000, is experienced by the table. This data is measured in millions of tonnes. Overall, it can be seen that there was a significant increase in the US while, this is followed by Japan.

First of all, in 1980, the number of garbage industry in the United States stood at 131 millions of tonnes which this is a highest rate in all countries and it increased by 61 million tonnes in the next two decades. This compared with Poland, Portugal and Ireland where three of them solely produced the residue under 7 millions of tonnes over a-fifth century.

Furthermore, great changes was seen in the two countries, namely Japan and Korea where each started at 28 million tonnes and no figure is mentioned respectively in 1980. Then, in the next 10 years, their figures rose to approximately 32 million tonnes. Interestingly, Japan continued the negative trend to 53 millions of tonnes, while Korea produced waste decrease to 19 millions of tonnes.

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Writing Feedback / Task 2 - A foreign language and adopting the traditions [3]

In order to speak a foreign language well, you need to adopt the culture of people who speak that language, and adopt some of their traditions. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

These days, a great deal of invasions come to a country. Some people reckon if they have to adopt the culture first before learning the origin language. In this case, I strongly disagree with this statement. This is because citizens can study language without learning the cultures, yet solely with more practices and exercises.

With regard to understand the language, people believe it is hard to be master in foreign language. As such, that is not mother language as usually inhabitants speak in daily activities. So, they need to practice more in order to make it as a habitual. For instance, a person who cannot speak English well, then he tries to study making conversation with the native speaker. Sure, he is predicted to gain improvement in his language skill although it is not occur in short-time. Furthermore, he has to be more exercises.

However, some others think if individuals wants to be easier in understanding language, they have to learn the foreign cultures. This is true because if people know the cultures, it will be more advantages. But, in other cases, they do not need adoption the traditions. For example, a 2013 recent Harvard University revealed that most Japanese tend to be proud with their cultures and languages and some of them can speak English. This is caused they are more likely to prevent their mother language so they keep their traditions.

The aforementioned evidence shows that if people want to be master in a language, they should not consume the traditions as well. Main point, they have to spend their spare time for practicing.