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Calculus & Diversity - Common App Essay

3 - Thank you so much for your quick response! I will go fix that. Also, somehow this sentence seems...

UndergraduateDamselfly - Oct 30, 2008Damselfly - Oct 30, 2008
Penn autobiography; Adults and children are nearly two entirely separate species

2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, when you start something with quotation marks, make sure you finish it. For instance, what...

Undergraduatex3racha3l - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
Drawing inspiration from Depression - Common App Essay

2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, avoid using contractions in formal academic writing; they are inappropriate and many instructors will count...

Undergraduatemattvroeg - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
to spend summer in New Zealand - Common App essay

2 - Good afternoon. Mechanically, a couple of things. First, avoid contractions in formal academic writing; they are inappropriate...

Undergraduatespinningjenny - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
In the hospitable bed, UF Essay: Meaningful Experience

2 - Good afternoon. The only thing I noticed about this piece was a contraction- "I'd." Make sure you avoid...

UndergraduateObie55 - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
I will always seek the goodness around me - UF Essay

2 - Good afternoon. While this is a very well crafted introspective piece, I'm not sure it answers the prompt....

Undergraduatebitofvanilla91 - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
My very first Youth and Government meeting - Common App Essay 250+

2 - Good afternoon. Just a few mechanical suggestions. First, when "referring" to something, make sure you are using...

Undergraduatecavemenrppl2 - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
a class taught by a historic figure-living or dead - Writing sample

2 - Good afternoon. First, remember punctuation at the end of every sentence. Second, do you mean "stooped," or...

Undergraduatemickeygirl - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
Legend / Subtitles... description of images in texts.

2 - Good afternoon. Generally they are called "captions." "Together," "with," "in addition to," or "alongside" could also work....

Grammar, Usagesaragrunhagen - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
question about application requirement

2 - Good afternoon. The prompt asks you to put forth an original idea and support it, so it seems...

Graduatefx3z - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
"Why Carnegie Mellon University"

2 - Good afternoon. A few things. First, make sure you are only capitalizing proper nouns and the first...

Undergraduatecloudone - Oct 30, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
To become a youth leader at my church - meaningful accomplishment in my life. UF Admission Essay

2 - Good afternoon. Just one correction: "In order to become a youth leader, I had to attend a...

UndergraduateSturz15 - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
fulfilling life because of Color - UF essay

2 - Good afternoon. A couple of suggestions. First "team mate" is one word: "teammate." Also, the conclusion is a...

Undergraduatelizcamp - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
My passion towards History - UMich Essays.

2 - Good afternoon. First, mechanics for the first piece: "But somehow, I found myself caught up in teaching...

UndergraduateJaney - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences - Persuasive essay on why music should be in school

3 - Good afternoon. I'll go ahead and give you some pointers to get you started: When you use...

Writing Feedbackchazbell - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 30, 2008
My parents continually pushed me to be the very best - MIT Admissions Essay

NEW - Describe the world you come from, for example your family, clubs, school, community or town. How has the world...

UndergraduateAleksey - Oct 30, 2008 -
'International Human Rights Projects' - short answer for UPenn

NEW - Prompt: Penn offers its undergraduates an eminent faculty and a wealth of research opportunities. Use the space below to...

Undergraduateflickeringlight - Oct 30, 2008 -
I will accept any of the disadvantages - Personal statement

NEW - I'm applying to Seattle University and I need to write a min 250 words of essay. The question is...

Undergraduatejoy - Oct 30, 2008 -
A passage about some measures to protect endangered animals

4 - That would be more appropriate. Regards, Gloria Moderator, EssayForum.com...

Writing Feedbacksweetbitterrose - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
Recommend change to our next president - Penn State #3 Essay

2 - Good evening. My first concern with this essay is that of missing citation. You have quite a few...

Undergraduatejusanglee91 - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
developing life threatening disease - Penn State #2 Essay

2 - Good evening. The main thing I am concerned about is that you have a lot of statistics in...

Undergraduatejusanglee91 - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
Is Consumerism a good or bad thing?

NEW - Do you think consumerism is a good or bad thing? Given your response, how do you respond to the...

Writing Feedbackrivoltaleandro - Oct 29, 2008 -
"Am I really going through with this?"; the experience which caused me to choose this field of study

5 - It is not necessary. Regards, Gloria Moderator, EssayForum.com...

Undergraduatelburgess88 - Oct 28, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
Hurricane Katrina, summer 2007 - New Orleans suffered great tolls.

3 - Good evening. "During the summer of 2007, my youth group went to New Orleans; since it was already...

Undergraduatejrheeeee - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
'slowest runners on the team' - Cross Country track admission essay

3 - Gloria, Wow! Thank you for the prompt reply. If I might indulge your services one more time...

Undergraduateraymille - Oct 29, 2008raymille - Oct 29, 2008
Need help choosing topic for Sociology paper

3 - thank you, that is exactly what I was referring to....

Essaysbgibson8708 - Oct 29, 2008bgibson8708 - Oct 29, 2008
Presidential Comparison paper (sociology)

3 - thank you for your feedback! I hope my sociology teacher thinks like you do....

Writing Feedbackbgibson8708 - Oct 29, 2008bgibson8708 - Oct 29, 2008
mistakes in foreign policy and planning - admission essay

NEW - Discuss a cultural, social, political, or intellectual topic that you have explored beyond school and explain how it has...

Undergraduatejasonwiesenthal - Oct 29, 2008 -
150 words short answers, my goal and perseverance

2 - I am assuming you are seeking technical assistance: The comma after "time" should be removed and "disagreeably" should...

Undergraduatelikeyapper - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
very short essay- family opbligations

2 - I'm assuming you are seeking technical assistance: First, make sure that if you use a period the first...

Undergraduatelecokr - Oct 29, 2008EF_Team5 - Oct 29, 2008
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