Writing Feedback / Influences that can be caused by computers! [4]

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children.

Do you agree or disagree?

Computer has always been an underlying utility for every steps of life since it can provide you numerous information of any aspects in a split second. Whilst, it has some obvious benefits, notwithstanding computer engenders so many issues for people, especially for children, such as reducing eye vision and hampering from working properly. Therefore, I am personally convinced that computer's detrimental effects outweigh its pros for children.

The majority of children these days carry glasses with them, since they have way too many opportunities to utilize electronic devices like phones and computers, television, and also, their eyes are still developing at the early stage of their life , and thus, there is an increasing number of child who cannot see without glasses. Once they grow up, ironically, their vision will not return, unless if they will spend a colossal amount of money for the eyes surgery which can be quite painful. Envision yourself, a kid, who possess lots of electronic devices such as computers, obviously the likelihood of him having blurry eyes in the future is quite high, albeit it does not always apply to every single human being, since it is all about genetics, but it is imperative to have a backup plan. As a result, computers should be prohibited for children.

Aside from the eye issue, computers are capable of preoccupying children's time because they usually have an abundance of astounding games as well as other utilities such as programs which can be really enticing. This can lead towards lack of performance in the school and that is not we are struggling for. Assume that there was a kid, who was bought a powerful computer, he will definitely try to utilize it at first, as time went by, his addiction to computer would keep increasing because computer was too immersive. Hence, computers can make a huge impact on child's studies in a horrible way.

Consequently, the influences which computers can create for our offspring are horrifying because they diminish our young generation's eye vision and they jeopardize our children's studies. Taking all the aforementioned points to the account, I totally consent that relying on computers can cause more disadvantages than advantages when it comes to children.

Writing Feedback / Overall, transportation, housing, and food were the underlying utilities of all four countries. [3]

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The line graph provides a breakdown in term of percentage of five main categories which are Food, Housing, transportation, Health care, clothing of The United states, Canada, The united kingdom, and japan in 2009.

Overall, Transportation, housing, and food were the underlying utilities of all four countries.

When it comes to Housing and Health care, United states had a step ahead of all five countries with its 25 % and 5%, while these values are huger than a few percent of other countries. Food on the other hand was reckoned to be the highest in Japan which is about 23 %, this number is larger than United kingdom for two point five percent, while United states and Canada both are less than United Kingdom by approximately 5 percent. Canada managed to take the first place in Transportation and clothing since it possessed 20 percent and 6 percent, in the meantime, the gap between Canada and The United states when it comes transportation is about two percent, and the difference kept exaggerating for the rest two countries. Clothing somehow was almost identical for four countries for about 5 percent each relatively.

Writing Feedback / It is extremely arduous for globalization to completely eliminate our precious culture. [3]

As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to a phenomenon known as globalization. Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Globalization has always been a polemical issue for people who worship their traditional belief and things. Whilst, globalization can somehow influence one's culture, notwithstanding the impact that it will engender is insignificant since our government will always be intervening if the absolute globalization takes place and our traditions will often be inherited to young generations by the older ones. Therefore, I am totally convinced that globalization's influence will be insubstantial when it comes to influencing our culture.

The majority of people these days tend to globalize themselves since that way will help them to catch up the contemporary people. However, it has its own limits, our government will never permit something to take out completely our culture, after all, our culture is our history and it should always be remembered by the youngsters. We also yearn to prove that our culture more or less special just as other cultures, even though it does not always apply to everyone, because there are some individuals who have a penchant for desiring a complete globalization. Those folks simply do not understand how majesty and priceless is our culture's identity, and thus, they fail to see the truth, but they are not many. As a result, the likelihood of our culture being exterminated is quite low.

Aside from the intervention, our education has a tendency to impart traditional notion to our kids and the traditions will also be reminded frequently for the rest of our life. This way will permeate our people's mindset,that we always have to proud of our culture. Assume that you are part of our culture and you dwell in our country, obviously you would be inspired to advocate our culture and eventually your offspring will behave the same as you when they grow up, since you are the person, who they look up to. Hence, it is extremely arduous for globalization to completely eliminate our precious culture.

Consequently, the influences of globalization is quite weak to fully occupy any cultures because the traditions of a specific culture will be left to their kids, and also, the education will take care of our culture. Taking all the points to the account, I am fairly certain that our culture will keep existing until we cannot breath in this world any longer.

Writing Feedback / A typical day of the underground station, rush hours in London train station - IELTS task 1 [2]

The line graph provides a breakdown information in term of the number of people who rely on London Underground station on a typical day.

If analyzed, the data show that there is always a significant rise of people in the early morning as well as in the mid evening.

Initially, the number of people stands at 100 at six o'clock. After 2 hours, this figure peaks to 400 people, while this value is huger than the number of people at 10 o'clock for almost 200, with a slight increase from 10 o clock to 14 o clock. The value plummets after 14 o clock to roughly 100 people at 16:00. Subsequently, the story almost repeats itself as the beginning, since at 18:00, there is approximately 400 people and then, the number dropped to close to 100 people at 20:00. The story ends with some insubstantial fluctuations up and down during 20:00 to 22:00.

The data suggest that the rush hours of London station are at 8 o clock in the morning and at 6pm.

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Writing Feedback / Starting earlier, you will encounter more types of sentence structures, grammars and vocabulary [3]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Learning a new language has always been arduous for many individuals. The vast majority of them, usually starts comprehending another language, when their childhood have already said goodbye to them, and thus, beginning to learn a language as soon as possible is the best option, since it can reduce your accent and solidify your language foundation. Therefore, I am personally convinced that children should start experiencing a new language, when their formal education starts off.

An abundance of people finds it difficult to learn, for example, English language. It is perfectly understandable, since most of them did not have the opportunity to learn it, when they were young. As you become older, your tongue gradually adjusts to the language that you utilize most of the time. The only way for you to thwart that from happening, is to learn a new language in the beginning of your life. For pragmatic instance, I have an elder brother and a younger brother. They both began learning English at different age, specifically, the elder one from eighteen and the younger one from six. After five years of practicing English, my younger brother managed to possess the American accent, while the elder was no way near that wonderful accent. As a corollary, the sooner you start, the better it is going to become.

Aside from the accent, you can also strengthen your English or any other language foundations, since, by starting earlier, you will encounter more types of sentence structures, grammars and vocabulary. This can advocate you to articulate more like a native speaker. It does not always apply to every single human being because numerous individuals tend to never put any efforts into their subjects, when they are young, notwithstanding they will still be better than those who start learning a language later, when it comes the accent. Envision yourself, being a lucky kid with lots of chances of studying English, apparently, sooner or later you will surpass other typical kids because you have a better understanding of English. Hence, it is imperative to urge your child to study any language right in the beginning of his education time.

Consequently, the benefits of commencing to study a language, when you are young and ingenuous are enormous. Taking all the points into account, I have a robust belief that start doing anything early in this life is lucrative, including languages.

Writing Feedback / 'Overall, all three museums had an upward trend' - Museums and its attenders. IELTS task 1 [NEW]

The line graph provides a breakdown of information in terms of thousands of numbers of visitors per month in summer 2013 who visit British museum, science museum and natural history museum, from June to September.

Overall, all three museums had an upward trend.

When it comes to Natural history museum and science museum, they both declined from June to July to 380 thousands and 350 thousands respectively. While the British museum sharply increased to roughly 700 thousands. The later period which is from July till august, the British museum and science museum share each other fates, by decreasing their thousands for more than 200 thousands and approximately 50 thousands. In Sharp contrast to this, natural history museum remained constant at roughly 380 thousands. At the end which is from august to September, all three tourist attractions rose simultaneously, as British museum increased its thousands for almost 100, in the meantime, Natural museum and science museum reached about 470 thousands relatively.

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Writing Feedback / Children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need; children and crimes [2]

Recent figures show an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18. Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for this is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Young people under the age of eighteen, these days, often commit lots of crimes. It is perfectly understandable, since people who live in this contemporary society such as their parents tend to be tied up all the time, and thus, they do not have a sufficient amount of time to take care of offspring. Teachers also contribute to this phenomenon, because some of them have a penchant for slugging during their job time. Therefore, I absolutely consent with the community which asserts that this phenomena is engendered due to the lack of attention of parents and teachers.

In this busy world, everything should be finalized promptly and efficiently, time is money. This can cause a significant impact on the child's behavior, since one yearns to obtain at least some attention from their parents, and parents sometimes are just too busy to satisfy their child's demand. For pragmatic instance, I used to have a friend whose parents were merchants and they usually worked abroad, because it was almost impossible for them to earn numerous profits in our country. So, there was a day, when my friend could not suppress his desire which is to talk face-to-face with his parents. He began to rob people in order to get caught to attract some attention from his parents. As a result, parents' attention is imperative for any kid's life.

Aside from parents' common mistake, teachers, especially in our country tend to be way too warm-hearted. They do not fulfill their duty at some extent which is to educate children properly. It does not always apply to every teacher on this planet, but some individuals act this way. I can recall myself, when I was an ingenuous kid. There was a classmate of mine, whose habit or hobby was to snitch somebody's item. At first, the teacher did not pay attention to his action, because she believed that, eventually, he would become a better person. Unfortunately, it did not go well as she had planned. After two years, that guy went to jail due to his innate habit. Hence, some teachers do underpin this phenomena.

Consequently, teacher and parents can substantially affect on the child's behavior. Taking all the points into account, I have a robust belief that nowadays, both parents and teachers spoil young generation's behavior.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1; Employment patterns of females and males in Britain! [2]

The two pie charts provide a breakdown information of the employment patterns of Great Britain, in 1992. Both charts were measured in percentage. If analyzed, the data suggest that male superior than women when it comes to Managerial and Professional and Craft or similar, while the woman had an advantage of General laborers, Clerical or related, other non-manual and manual.

When it comes to males in 1992, specifically, Managerial and Professional, they possessed 36 percent, whereas this value is higher than a woman's one for 7 percent. Clerical or related had another story, the opposite gender of male experienced 31 percent, but the male had only 6 percent. Other manual had the same story, women were recorded 27%, and this is 1 percent higher than a male's one. Both genders which are female and male, stood at 9 percent and 6 percent, when it comes Other non-manual. Male totally vanquished females if the story was about Craft or similar and General laborers, since a male had 24 percent and 2 percent, whilst the opposite sex had only 3 percent and 1 percent respectively.

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Writing Feedback / Worst criminals in our society. Murderers and their destiny! IELTS task 2 [2]

By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilt of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Murderers have always been the worst criminals in our society. They should be punished austerely, otherwise the number of murderers will increase. By providing the death penalty for murderers, our society will be more placid to live in, and that is what we are struggling for. Thus, I absolutely disagree that murderers should sit in the prison, in lieu of being dead.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS: The first diagram exhibits the way the structure produces its electricity [2]

Two diagrams provide the breakdown information of the structure that produces electricity from wave power. The structure consists of chamber, turbine and two columns with some supports from the sea wall and wave.

The first diagram exhibits the way the structure produces its electricity is by having a wave as the source to create the air. Once the air is generated, it will force the turbine to spin clockwise. Not to mention that both columns and cliff or sea wall will assure that the air will breeze the turbine. Thus, that is the first way of creating electricity

Shifting to the second diagram, its features obviously identical to the first method, which are columns, cliff or sea wall and turbine, nevertheless, chamber. This time, the wave will retreat, and therefore, it will engender the turbine to spin clockwise as well, because of the wind that go from up to down. Notwithstanding, the turbine will still be revolving and making electricity.

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Writing Feedback / The benefits of living in the contemporary world! We used to squander hours on preparing our foods. [2]

Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Foods used to be an issue for people, since our people did not know, how to correctly cultivate or herd back then. Notwithstanding, now, we do not have to experience that problem any longer, because we now are quite erudite when it comes to foods. In fact, we can prepare our meals promptly. This phenomena helps our society expedite, and it can make us more salubrious.

We as human beings used to squander hours on preparing our foods. This engendered numerous troubles for us, such as being late to work or missing some memorable events. Nowadays, we can reduce the time of food preparation, which can be really convenient. For pragmatic instance, me , as a worker, tended to arrive late to work because of the foods, many years ago. Obviously, now, when I have a plenty amount of fast foods in my fridge, I will have more time for myself and works. This also applies to many other individuals. As a result, foods' these days have advocated us immensely.

Aside from the aforesaid benefit, when we do not have to waste much time on preparing foods. We will have more to cook other helpful meals. This can bolster our physical condition. Even though, it does not always work for every person, since one might decide to consume potato chips. However, the vast majority of people yearns to possess a healthy life, and thus, only minority begin to eat unnecessary foods, after the advent this phenomenon. Envision yourself, having more time after the preparation. This might possibly force you to cook more, since you used to allot an ample time to your foods. Therefore, our current preparation time definitely underpins our health.

The aforementioned reasons insinuate, that our swift preparation has contributed a lot to our society. Without it, we would never be able to be this healthy and productive, which are what we are struggling for.

Writing Feedback / Japan was the leader when it comes annual income and life expectancy - IELTS table [2]

The table provides a breakdown information of social and economic indicators for four countries which are Canada, Japan, Peru and Zaire, in 1994. If analyzed, the data suggests that Japan was the leader when it comes annual income and life expectancy, whereas Canada took the first place of daily calories per person. In addition, Japan and Canada both had the same and the highest adult literacy rate.

The annual income of Japan in 1994 stood at 15760 $, while this value was huger than Canada's one for almost 4000 $. The life expectancy, however, both had an insignificant gap, Japan's life expectancy at birth was 78 and Canada was less than 2 years. Canada managed to surpass the daily calories per person in Japan which was 2846, with its 3326. This two under review country had the same Adult literacy rate which was 99 percent.

Another two countries had the opposite story, the annual income of Peru was 160, whilst Zaire had only 130. The life expectancy at birth in these two countries which are Peru and Zaire were quite low, 51 and 47 only. The daily calorie supply per person of two countries were also terrifying, Peru was recorded as 1927 and Zaire even worse, which is 1749. It seemed like Peru's adult literacy rate equaled to two Zaire combined, which was 68 percent.

Indicators Canada Japan Peru Zaire
Annual income per person (in $US) 11100 15760 160 130
Life expectancy at birth 76 78 51 47
Daily calorie supply per person 3326 2846 1927 1749
Adult literacy rate (%) 99 99 68 34

Please provide me with some useful advice!