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'math tutoring program' Activity Essay for the Common app

5 - Student tutors were only selected from the senior AP Calculus classes. Being a fervent fan of mathematics, I was...

UndergraduateHelpPls - Nov 15, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
Personal Statement - MFA in Digital Media/Teaching Credential

4 - Yeah, i don't think I've ever been compelled to tell someone, yes! send it in! But something about...

Graduatealejandramax - Nov 13, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
My dilemma dramatically changed my perspectives on life; ethical dilemma/alcoholism

2 - First I think you should omit "useless, pathetic and stupid" and put quotes around "substance abuse" I also...

Undergraduatecalderon - Nov 19, 2009TFS109201 - Nov 19, 2009
'Volunteering at the hospital, pediatrician' - UC Personal Statement: community

2 - Going to school and interacting with friends does not really set you apart from anyone! Yes, you need that...

Undergraduatemshalavadi - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
My Two Sons - Thesis statement for Comparison essay

5 - I have two fantastic boys in my family that were born four years apart and are as different as...

Writing Feedbackbmerrell - Nov 17, 2009TFS109201 - Nov 19, 2009
Dickinson college supplement-globally engaged citizen leaders

4 - My men may sound bad.., My people is not much better. If you say "my colleagues" or something like...

Undergraduateruzhang143 - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
Crack! I was down! ; COMMON APP/ Significant Experience

4 - Crack! I was down. A million different thoughts spun in my head. That is just an idea I...

Undergraduatetjk10 - Oct 28, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
my art essay, parthenon vs pantheon

6 - omg i think you are in my class! i have the same thing... 4 exam questions too for my...

Writing Feedbackstockwell - Nov 17, 2009sesudita - Nov 19, 2009
"Seek, seek"-common application short answer( elaborate on one of your activity)

4 - Maybe you can think of something creative to do with seek, seek, seek. Seeking scholarly sources, web resources, and...

Undergraduatejelly - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
UC Essay #2 An important experience. Roller Coaster

12 - Mustafa, you are so mean! Ha ha, and even though my first impulse is that it is not good...

UndergraduateJennB2288 - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
My passion for knowledge has been nurtured fiercely since infancy, magnifying every passing moment

10 - Whenever someone tells you about a conflict, and they tell you the other person used them as a punching...

Undergraduatenatasha99 - Nov 11, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
MacCauley Honors Essay Topic See the World

2 - Your first sentence is a great attention grabber! You need to make a clear thesis statement at the end...

UndergraduatePolinaFerd - Nov 17, 2009EF_Susan - Nov 19, 2009
Essay on events that have changed Australia's multicultural society - feedback.

3 - Looking good. If you get inspired, maybe you will come up with a more intriguing first line. This is...

Writing Feedbackdubulee - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 19, 2009
the mountain lion UC prompt 1; the world you come from

8 - You are talking about a love of nature but there is no nature in this. Take advantage of your...

Undergraduatecaslyn1 - Nov 13, 2009purl81 - Nov 19, 2009
I am going to make it to UCF, "bump in the road"

2 - ^Ummm...not quite, especially since college decisions are not always uniform...you can be the best student ever and not...

Undergraduatetakemeoutoxox - Nov 18, 2009Llamapoop123 - Nov 19, 2009
UC prompt 1 "Operation Iraqi Freedom"

6 - It's a moving essay, but it doesn't really show how it shaped your aspirations. Your dad going to war...

Undergraduatesamicaligirl92 - Nov 15, 2009Moonshadow0302 - Nov 19, 2009
'No reason I needed these classed' - An experience in which I left my comfort zone

3 - I love your story! For my idea I think you should have more description about your inner feeling for...

Undergraduatetrishaa78 - Nov 18, 2009Twinkle - Nov 19, 2009
UC Essay #1: My family and my dreams

5 - Thanks for the feedback...this is just a first draft, I forgot to say lol. So its kinda boring and...

UndergraduateJennB2288 - Nov 18, 2009JennB2288 - Nov 19, 2009
The United Nations... They go there whenever they want to go...

9 - may you tell me your opinion about it?...

Poetrybilal ABUZENAH - Oct 24, 2009bilal ABUZENAH - Nov 18, 2009
Thanksgiving night; UC Prompt #1 - Traditions

7 - I disagree with amaryrose. I think that the ending sentence is just the right way to end the essay,...

Undergraduategumdrop41 - Nov 17, 2009Pikafu - Nov 18, 2009
I was always told to bury my face in books all day;FIELD HOCKEY/ Topic of my choice

NEW - Please write an essay (250 words minimum) on a topic of your choice or on one of the options...

UndergraduateAnguyen12t - Nov 18, 2009 -
Personal statement for University of Wisconsin Madison. prompt #1

4 - thanks for the advices. I tried doing it again and it did not turn out so well. It...

Undergraduatehelpme143 - Nov 14, 2009helpme143 - Nov 18, 2009
Putting my thoughts on paper; UT austin Statement of Purpose

7 - I think this will be my final, before my submission. Thank you Kevin for the editing that you done...

Undergraduatenuncio900 - Oct 31, 2009nuncio900 - Nov 18, 2009
Overcoming Illness - I am proud of what I have learned from it; UC Prompt 2

3 - in the first sentence, you don't need "of my life" "Walking around out doors was on its own...

Undergraduateateitelb - Nov 18, 2009gumdrop41 - Nov 18, 2009
"got a call announcing that I had the job" - common app short answer-activity

10 - "Instead, I dropped by every cafe in the town with copies of my resume and expounded upon the irrationality...

Undergraduateyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy - Nov 10, 2009thatpersonphil - Nov 18, 2009
Common Application Essay An essay about moments in my life

3 - The premise is interesting, but your structure is very blocky. I would definitely recommend paring down many of your...

UndergraduateTFS109201 - Nov 17, 2009amaryrose - Nov 18, 2009
Short Activity Essay for Common App - Volunteering in Ecuador

5 - The only sentence I think could use some work is the second to last. "Conversing with the children...

Undergraduatemelaaanieee - Nov 18, 2009amaryrose - Nov 18, 2009
Common App- 150 words- Student Council

4 - Hey, considering we are on the same student council i think i may be of assistance lol One...

Undergraduatemle2010 - Nov 16, 2009medelman2010 - Nov 18, 2009
UC personal statement- community and family

7 - Thank you, yeah I didn't want to sound aggrogant. Its really hard for me to write about myself and...

Undergraduatebabylocs23 - Nov 17, 2009babylocs23 - Nov 18, 2009
International Studies Paper on the effects of war.......

2 - How true and terrible that Twain quote is! Hey, I don't understand that last sentence of the first...

Writing FeedbackMGH1989 - Nov 17, 2009EF_Kevin - Nov 18, 2009
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