Writing Feedback / The pie charts illustrate the water usage for six different regions around the world [3]

The writing of IELTS Cambridge 11 Test1 Task 1

The pie charts illustrate the water usage for six different regions around the world. It is crystal clear to see that argriculture water using purpose occupied the greatest amount in Central Asia, and it is also the most biggest percentage among the three water categories. Next followed by industrial water usage,which contains about 53% in Europe. Compared to the others, the motive of taking domestic water is relatively less,only South America has 19% and demands more domestic water usage than the other five territories.

As we can see that although Central Asia consumed the most ratio of agriculture water purpose, its industrial one is the last. Taking a close look, we can easily to find out that its domestic one is in the last position as well, just 7%, same as South East Asia.

Then it is quite straightforward to know that Europe and north America are industrialized cause they need a lot of water for industrial purpose. On the other hand, the other four regions are non-industralized due to the extremely less portion of industrial water using purpose compared to the former one.

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Writing Feedback / The issue of whether government should invest on railway systems more than roads or not [3]

The writing of IELTS Cambridge 11 Task 2

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The issue of whether government should invest on railway systems more than roads or not is controversial in society. It is argued by some people that putting efforts on railways is a brilliant way compare to constructing roads. However, I personally disagree that constructing more railway systems are much more beneficial than roads. The following essay will illustrate the two chief reasons of my opinion.

First of all, creating a mass railway system need to accumulate abundant of money and time. Unlike the money which invests on roads, governments have to gather funds from private companies or increase tax from citizens in order to create a new railway. It might cause the financial heaviness of society. In addition, roads can be built within a short-term period, and we can start to use it in handy. On the contrary, from planning to completing the whole train system, it takes at least more than ten years. Nowadays, world and society are changeable, we never know what is going to happen in the next second, not to mention if we can really use railway facilities in that far future. This is my first reason why I disagree the statement which mentioned on the topic.

Secondly, it is not so efficient for train to reach all the villages or rural districts. It is said that all roads lead to Rome and it is a true fact compare to the limitation of railway expansion. Most of the time, railway only can reach main cities. The citizens who live in country would prefer to chose roads. Based on the efficiency and convenience factors, I strongly deny the statement that held on the topic.

In summary, I once again reaffirm my position that governments spend money on railways rather than roads is inappropriate and I completely disagree with that due to the massive money and time investing. Last but least, its own efficiency.

Writing Feedback / The unemployment level in Australia 2012 (IELTS Writing Task 1) [3]

Australian citizens without any occupation

The line graph illustrates the percentage of citizens without occupations in city districts and countryside territories from the beginning of 2012 to the last of 2012 in Australia.

Overall, the ratio of unemployment in countryside showed downward in the first two quarters while the other portion of city area was displayed upward. However, it is exceedingly apparent that both proportions which displayed the citizens without job decreased dramatically at the beginning of third quarter.

After the downward trend, both lines went to the steady upward trend for a period of time. Nevertheless,when the percentages of rural sections reached around 5.5%, it suddenly turned into fluctuated situation which can be apparently seem the line ups and downs until the last month of 2012. On the contrary, the city districts depicted the third-increased trend from around 3.9% to 4.9% in the last quarter of 2012.

Moreover, the percentages between both areas in last quarter are the closest compared to another period of quarters.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 Writing - Compulsory military service for unemployed youth [3]

The youth in many countries are unemployed and unskilled, where at the same time, the military services are in need of people. Compulsory military service is beneficial and necessary.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

military activity for youngsters

The issue of whether the teenagers must join the essential army service or not is certainly a controversial topic. Despite some people argued that it is pros outweighed cons.I personally disagree with that. The following examples will illustrate my point of views.

Firstly, based on the economic value,army facilities can be replaced human beings not only for the duration of function but also the expanse. In one word, it can fulfill the demands of people. For example, government can purchase the high-tech tank or automatic weapon which is controlled by machine and they can be operated properly more than a real human being. In addition, a well-trained army takes around 3 to 5 years to finish their training while the automatic weapon can be operated right after we purchased it. Moreover, citizens need to pay for a well-trained army salary until he passes away. In my opinion,I would like to pay tax for long-term used facilities rather than an army.

Secondly, I generally believe that teenagers should attend schools to acquire knowledge instead of join military. As like the topic mentioned about, most of the children in the world are without occupations and talents for employment and join military cannot provide them a well education to gain more practical skills to find a proper job. For instance, a study showed that a teenager who joined military did not acquire any general knowledge while the others who went to school obtained a numerous skill from educational center and they found a proper job afterward. It goes without saying that joining the compulsory military service for children is not beneficial for them, instead, it is a somewhat negative.

In summary, I once again reaffirm my position that I disagree necessary military activity is positive and essential for teenagers. On the contrary, I believe that it is not an appropriate way to do so based on economic value and the importance of education for youth.

Writing Feedback / IELTS 1 - the statistics between marriages and divorces rate and marital status of adult Americans [2]

Number of marriages and divorces in the USA

The two bar charts below illustrate the statistics between marriages and divorces rate and marital status of adult Americans ratio from 1970 to 2000.

Overall, the rate of marriages outweighs the divorces within that period of time. Meanwhile, it is crystal clear that the proportions of married Americans is stand at the greatest amount compare to the others' categories.

Having the exact figures, the total quantity of marriage reached the same level between 1970 and 1989,which is occupied 2.5 million. However, begins from 1990, the number tends to dwindle from approximately 2.4 million to 2 million until 2000. At the same time, the trend of divorces is upward from 1970 to 1980,which is from 1 million to roughly 1.4 million. Nevertheless, it decreased slightly from 1980 to 2000.

The second bar chart displays the ratio of marital status of adult Americans. Compared to the married Americans percentage, the others of marital status are strikingly less. It is exceedingly apparent that the least amount is located in 1970 of divorce rate,which is rarely reached 2%.

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Writing Feedback / Should travellers obey local customs and behaviors when they visit other countries or not? [2]

foreign visitors and the local customs

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The issue of whether travellers should obey local customs and behaviors when they visit to other countries or not is certainly a controversial topic. Despite some people utterly disagree that and claim the host country should be open-minded and accept culture differences. However, I personally believe that visitors should follow local policy as and respect their culture. The following statements will illustrate my point of views.

First of all, some people said that if one country would like to embrace different concepts of other nationalities, people will become more flexible and diversity, which can be easily get along with different kinds of people. Nevertheless, in my humble opinion, it means lose of their own culture's features. Take a real example, New York is an international city and millions of different countries' people live there, yet we even do not know how to describe New Yorker's behaviors or their customs. Their own customs are getting vanish due to the acceptance of culture difference. Based on this reason, it is quite inappropriate to accept all countries' culture difference.

Second, following and respecting local policy would be a proper way out. Not only preserve the original of local people's behaviors,but also they share the different values to the visitors. In the meanwhile, visitors should respect that some people in the world who are not having similar concepts like them and it would be perfect if they can balance their culture differences. For instance, like Australia, they embrace people from around the world to immigrate to their country while they still keep their original culture concept and their culture and local customs are not influenced by outsiders at all.

In summary, I still believe that respect local customs is necessary. No matter others dispute and think that host country should be open-minded, I strongly consider protecting local culture is overriding.

Question : I don't know if I should stand firmly at one side or not in summary..( I mean after I discuss both point of views, should I state which position I prefer or i think it is better than the other one in summary?)

Writing Feedback / Overpopulation Causes and Solutions; imbalance of employment opportunity and educational resources [3]

Most major cities around the world continue to grow at a phenomenal rate due to the massive increase in population. This has led to a general decline in the quality of life in city area as the environment becomes more crowded and polluted.

Give some reasons why this growth has occurred and suggest some practical solutions to this problem.

Nowadays, a rate of the majority main cities around the world increases dramatically because of the huge population. This has caused a significant reduction in the quality of life in urban areas. For example, the environment becomes over-populated, and many pollutions have occurred. The following will illustrate the factors of over-populated and how can it be solved.

First of all, the opportunity of employment might be one of the factors. A study shown that organizations tend to set their company in a big city, which can easily earn money and build reputation. Hence, they would like to offer more job opportunities in cities more than in the country areas. This definitely causes many people move to the city. Another reason is the educational resource. Take me as a real example, I had studied in two different universities because my parents changed their working places. One is in the countryside, which is lack of teacher resource, I even did not need to attend most of the courses due to there was no teacher to teach that course. Once I moved to the capital of my country, I started to realize that why people desperately want to move to the city to acquire better educational resources. Good quality of teaching resources, professional examination system, those definitely trigger more and more citizens to move to the city.

Secondly, the best and the most appropriate solution to solve over-populated issue is that the government should balance the employment and educational differentiation between urban and rural areas. By doing this, it might equal the chance of employment, people would like to stay and find an occupation in their hometown, which leads to reduce the over-populated and pollution in the city area. Furthermore, if the government would like to assign some good teachers to rural area and provide affluent salary, this would be another proper way to persuade citizens not to move to the city.

To sum up, the factors of overpopulation in the city and how to solve them are always a popular issue to discuss. I would like to restate that the imbalance of employment opportunity and educational resources are the main factors of it. However, I strongly believe that these two factors can be solved by the government well-arranged resource management between city and country.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - Procedures of Recruitment Flow Chart [4]

organization's staff hiring

The flow chart below illustrates a procedure of organization's staff hiring.

Overall, it is crystal clear that this flow chart contains thirteen different stages which beginning with the drawn-up requirements list and ending up with either applicant successfully obtained a job offer nor received a rejected letter.

To begin with, list of requirements have been drawn up, then the advertisement will be placed in the newspaper. Followed this will be the application form selected, after the application have been completed and returned, it will be opened and assessed by the human resource.

Secondly, the applicants will be either invited to the interview nor rejected by letter. Once interview finished, the applicants will be evaluated into two groups. One is an appropriate applicant and runner-up will be selected as a staff and company will offer the job. The other is an inappropriate applicant will be rejected and refusal letter will be sent to them personally.

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Writing Feedback / Language students - IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - TWO PIE CHARTS COMPARISON [3]

proportion of uk students able to speak a foreign language

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts illustrated the percentage of students who were utilized languages beside English at an university in England in the years of 2000 and 2010,respectively.

Overall, it is crystal clear to see that Spanish accounted for the majority portions of both years while students who are fluent at German stood at the least percentage.

Having an exact figure, it is exceedingly obvious that students who can speak Spanish not only occupied almost half portions of pie charts in both years but also increased 5% from 2000 to 2010.

While the percentage of students who were able to speak Spanish rose, the proportions of students who have no other language abilities decreased slightly from 20% to 10%. Similarly, the percentage of students who were able to speak French shared the same trend which decreased from 15% to 10%.

Furthermore, other languages spoken by students such as German remained steady which was 10% in both pie charts.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2- E-BOOKS V.S PRINTED MEDIA ? WHAT IS YOUR OPINIONS ? [2]

printed media will not go extinct

With recent developments in technology like e-books, some people feel that printed media like books, newspapers, and magazines will soon be a thing of the past. Others feel that these forms of media will never disappear.

What is your opinion ?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays, the topic of whether the printed media such as books, newspapers, and magazines will soon be replaced by the e-books or not is definitely a controversial one. Despite some people believe that printed media will soon be eliminated by generation. From my perspective, I still believe that hardcover books will never vanish. The following essay will illustrate my reasons and point of views.

Many people think that printed media such as newspaper is uncomfortable to read not only because during flipping the newspaper, the fingers will have ink on them, but also printed media is not so eco-friendly cause most of them are made from wood. Hence, they tend to read e-books online instead of reading printed media. However, it is a well-known fact that printed media still has a significant role in this generation. In 2018, the total selling amount of hand over books is twofold compared to e-books online. It is exceedingly evidence that can prove people still keen on reading real books rather than e-books even they consider e-books are more efficient.

Furthermore, for the health concern, it is no doubt to indicate that reading e-books online for a long period of time will harm your eyesight. A study showed that reading 1 hour in front of technology devices will diminish the degree of your eyesight. That is 2 times faster than reading a real book. Consequently, this repercussion drags down the willingness of people who are in favour of reading online.

In summary, I would therefore reaffirm my opinion that although the developments of e-books have spread widely since they were created, I still strongly believe that traditional printed media will last permanently owing to health concern and people's reading habits.

Writing Feedback / The quantity of water usage by different ways in the world and water consumption in Brazil and Congo [2]

water use and water consumption coverage

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

There are one line graph and one table. The former illustrates the quantity of water usage by different ways in the world while the latter depicts the water consumption in Brazil and Congo in the year of 2000.

Overall, it is exceedingly evident that agriculture water usage accounted for a great deal of amount in 2000. Meanwhile, water consumption for each citizen in Brazil was for than in Congo in the same year.

Taking a closer look at each graph and table, it is crystal clear that agriculture water usage was gradually increased from 1990 to 1950 and rose dramatically from 1950 to 2000 and reached 3000km3 in the year of 2000. On the contrary, industrial and domestic water usage remained stable from 1900 to 1940. From 1950 they both increased slightly while the industrial water usage rose higher than domestic one until 2000.

As can be seen on the table, Brazil had 176 million population, which was 35 times more than Congo. Compared to both countries' water consumption for each citizen, it is no doubt that Brazil required more water than Congo due to the fact that tremendous irrigated land and population.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS1 Comparison of population and projection in Yemen and Italy; the differentiation of percentage [4]

Age Structure in two different countries

The charts below give information on the ages of the populations of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

Here I have a question:
May I rephrase "aged 0 to 15" into " teenagers"
"aged 15 to 59" into "adults" and "aged 60+" into "elderly"?

The pie charts illustrate the total amount of all ages citizens between Yemen and Italy in 2000 and the comparison of projections for 2050.

Overall, it is exceedingly evident that the group of adults from aged 15 to 59 accounted for the majority proportion not only in populations but also projections in both countries. However, the age from 60 plus stood at the least percentage in population and projection of Yemen while the aged from 0 to 14 occupied the least ratio in population and projection of Italy in 2000 and 2050,respectively.

Taking a closer look, the differentiation of percentage between 15 to 59 years old of populations and projections in Yemen and Italy are quite slight in 2000 and 2050. Only 15.3% and 11.1%, respectively. In addition, the group of aged 60 plus accounted for almost half of pie chart of projections in Italy while it stood at the least in Yemen. There is 36.6% differentiation between both countries.

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