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stanford supplement: what makes stanford a good fit for you?

6 - I think you should explain more on how Stanford is different than any other university. You said how Stanford...

Undergraduateanhammond - Dec 21, 2009tchonis05 - Dec 23, 2009
"As a devout Catholic" - Notre Dame optional statement!

3 - It will be better if you name some of those great things!! :-) As soon as I...

Undergraduatetaylor318 - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
My Common App essay - going to Princeton, Yale, Williams, Tufts, et al.

6 - I'm glad someone brought up the incorrect use of semi-colons, because you use quite a few of them. Also,...

UndergraduateIvy_Equestrian - Dec 21, 2009cgnolan - Dec 26, 2009
Activity Essay for Common Application (paintings)

8 - I think this is much better. I wouldn't say it's too flowery, but it is more elegant than many...

Undergraduatepmurray62 - Dec 21, 2009goldeneye98 - Dec 31, 2009
My Mother's Words--CommonApp Essay

5 - She said that the letter was something that she wrote to us in case something ever happened to her,...

UndergraduateMarHall - Dec 21, 2009mjellma - Dec 27, 2009
Notre Dame Supplement Essay on project during high school

2 - This is such a strong, thoughtful essay; it seems to have everything. It catches my attention at the start,...

Undergraduateilovelaughing - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
Late in explaination ("someone couldn't keep their promise with me")

2 - That was the day on which our class said goodbye each other after three years of high school. ...

Undergraduateautumnwave - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
The Discoveries of Technology - Supplement Essay for CMU

4 - No, the title is not good enough. I think you already know that, though, because the title is so...

Undergraduateneow_neow - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
My name and it's influences on me: COMMON APP ESSAY:

5 - Though your original is gone, this revision appears to be almost identical, so my earlier comments stand. Sorry I...

Undergraduatejuesewang - Dec 21, 2009Jeannie - Dec 24, 2009
Rice Supplement - what motivated you to come to Rice?

4 - I think your essay is fine... But on my first draft, I also tried to use the quote "What...

Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 21, 2009leemj308 - Dec 22, 2009
Boston University Supplyment-the three key words to describe you

5 - as I have the ability to organize everything in perfect trims-- sounds better your first line really grabbed...

UndergraduateElysion - Dec 21, 2009AMehj - Dec 25, 2009
"Not quite an enigma" -Stanford Prompt

5 - At the beginning, you introduce the idea of an enigma, disqualify yourself from being one, and then change the...

UndergraduateBluePurgatory - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
"Ten minus seven"; EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITY- tutoring

5 - This is a very well written response, however I agree with juesewang about the elaboration part. How has tutoring...

Undergraduatejamiexc - Dec 21, 2009swirl92 - Dec 21, 2009
Stanford Supplement #1: Intellectual Vitality (Human Trafficking)

3 - this is a really good topic but maybe you should focus more on how the topic affects you and...

Undergraduateashley118 - Dec 21, 2009anhammond - Dec 21, 2009
"To be different from the world" - notre dame essay

10 - Im sorry. I don't want to sound annoying or anything, but if someone could please look at my essay,...

Undergraduaterjctcollege1 - Dec 21, 2009rjctcollege1 - Dec 28, 2009
John Hopkins Essay - Chemistry, The Combustion Reaction of My Knowledge

2 - While she continued to fill our minds with more cute analogies, and other students turned their attention to doodling,...

Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 21, 2009EF_Susan - Dec 22, 2009
"Memory" - Common Application Critique! my jet-black SLR camera

2 - ...juxtaposed against a background of my rivals between other competitors as my torso contorts itself over the barrier, each...

UndergraduatePsyched - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
Cornell Supplemeent - Intellectual Interests at College of Arts and Sciece =)

4 - I actually got rid of that in general haha...it suited better for another essay and if I included that...

Undergraduatetimeturner36 - Dec 21, 2009timeturner36 - Dec 24, 2009
Brown Supplement Essay on my Drama Team Experience

6 - Oh, I missed part of your question. Yes, I think you should not focus entirely on the content. The...

Undergraduateelement_g - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 25, 2009
About drugs, essay cornell

4 - Heyy thanks, it is a draft of what first came to my mind I would be majoring in Development...

Undergraduatemkjn91 - Dec 21, 2009mkjn91 - Dec 21, 2009
Northwestern supplement:: "A second chance"

6 - It definitely had some touching spots. Story of your home country You may consider the following tips: ...

Undergraduateginny2345 - Dec 21, 2009ZuluYaN - Dec 22, 2009
"independent person"- family history, culture, or environment influenced who you are?

3 - My family's culture has given me the confidence to overcome every obstacle that has been presented to me. ---->...

Undergraduateejiro - Dec 21, 2009EF_Kevin - Dec 24, 2009
The world, "ambitious and relentless" -common app essay (topic of my own choice)

2 - I really like this. My only suggestion is that I would be careful being so negative. I know your...

Undergraduatedaisyx3 - Dec 21, 2009twizzlestraw - Dec 21, 2009
Common App Essay- Own Topic: "Who I Am and What I came from."

2 - ^When you first talk about a phenomenon, are you referring to your friends getting a haircut? ...

Undergraduatejimmjacks12 - Dec 21, 2009Liebe - Dec 22, 2009
"Stronger" - Name an influential person: My Father (Common app essay)

7 - Jiyooun, you did a great job in making the story more about you. You do a lot of telling...

Undergraduatesportybluei - Dec 21, 2009daisyx3 - Dec 24, 2009
"I'm the definition of oxymoron" - stanford supplement essay (roommate)

11 - I don't doubt your reasons for referring to yourself as a jumping bean. But you are not the...

Undergraduatedaisyx3 - Dec 21, 2009Ellan - Dec 21, 2009
Common app essay, free topic "The Beauty of Translation"

10 - Lyolya, thank you for reading my essay over 3 times!! :) Your comments really helped. Harshil, thank you...

Undergraduatesportybluei - Dec 21, 2009sportybluei - Dec 23, 2009
"Anything is possible if you wish hard enough"Founder's scholarship to study abroad!

2 - is altered the right word? yes it means change, but altered seems to fit elsewhere. why...

Scholarshipsymmetrybox - Dec 21, 2009meisj0n - Dec 22, 2009
NYU 5 Supplements "Day with Adam Richman, Haiku..etc"

4 - don't really see the point of this sentence. is this to show that u have a good sense...

Undergraduaterawrfest - Dec 21, 2009hodari - Dec 25, 2009
"My Real Life Hero" - Common Application Essay Help-- Significant Influence

6 - Great job. Your narrative is brilliant and it shows how your mother inspired you. She spent endless hours...

Undergraduatedesidude2011 - Dec 21, 2009ChanelD1 - Dec 25, 2009
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