Writing Feedback / Daylight Saving Time Bears A Unique Matter [3]

A new puzzle appeared in Samuel and Ronan's birthday. Due to the daylight saving time that required time to retreat an hour, the first child was then younger that his twin. Fact said that Samuel was born at 1.39 a.m. on sixth November, 31 minutes later, his twin brother was given a birth but the o'clock set at 1.10 a.m.

Source : cosmopolitan

Writing Feedback / People may become crazy over such things as sports, religion and learning English [3]

TED Summary _ English Mania

People have their own types that they are crazy about such as sports, religious and learning English mania. People would go to put much effort on their interest. Lets pick Chinese as an example. They started to learn English in the very first time and therefore China is the world's largest English speaking. Factually, in order to get a bright future, or to tackle global matters, English is involved in it.

Writing Feedback / A place with Big Ideas to Get Rid of Fossil Fuels [2]

The most noticeable thing in Costa Rica is that they do not have army. In 1994, due to a civil war, a massive number of their societies were died and therefore people decided to abolish military. Hence, all the expenditures for military were turned to social expenses - free education and nursing - and it was what the citizens need more rather than army. Then it was what they called as stability.

Ms Araya, a costa rican, presented what her country had done regarding fossil fuels issue. Costa rica had utilized renewable energy to generate their electricity since couple of years ago. There were 299 days that this country did not use fossil fuels. She believed that seven out of ten of energy consumption was spent on vehicles.

She stated that we, world's occupants, can let fossil fuels go of as army's case in Costa Rica. "Let go fossil fuels for good" she said. Her statement then was strongly supported by the impact of climate change which do harm people. Then the question is, why do other country keep importing oil if the existence of other sources such as water from river, heat from volcanoes, solar and wind that surely can generate electricity? Later, it had been predicted that by 2020 there will be clean transportation like electric bus or car which reduces pollution and saves money. In the end of her speech, Ms. Araya suggested people to engage citizens starting to make a change in order to create country that we want. Thus, let's make the small developing country, Costa Rica, as the real model to not rely on fossil fuels anymore.

Writing Feedback / An Easy Brand New Approach for Gardeners [3]

This summary is extracted from an article published on readitenglish.com/read/rcXgoi# . Its original title is Grow it yourself : Aquaponics

A brand new method in farming field is appeared to be true, Aquaponics. It is one way to farm plants by combining aquaculture and hydroponics system. Hence, the waste water from fish farming is utilized to grow organic foods owing to the fact that the required chemical fertilizer is found on the fish waste. It is needless to say that by using this kind of approach, everyone who settle in a poor soil can do farming as well since the plants only need one out of ten amount of water of what ordinary plants need. This methodology is overwhelmingly natural as no pesticide is involved. Then the other merits goes to the reduction of climate change, groundwater pollution and overfishing.

Aquaponics is completely easy to be done due to gardeners only need to feed their plants once a day without need to think about watering time. For all people who are interested in applying it can go to visit the inventor's, Ms. Bernstein's, video on her Youtube channel, or read her published book.

Writing Feedback / Creative Approach to Teach Engineering for Everyone [3]

Fawn Qiu starts her idea by problems faced in her daily experiences. Taking back 'Fluppy Bird' games by app store and going to an event but nothing to be worn inspire her to create a physical Fluppy Bird games in a box and design a unique costum as well. Considering about the people's responses to the 'real' game, Qiu then comes up with the idea to teach primary and secondary students about engineering through creative projects. By utilizing paper and fabric - everyday materials - to replace costing tools in school, she changes the perception of technology as affordable and easy to be found.

Then, it results massive interest of students to make their own plays through those materials as they are eager to play their own games. Hence, through this creative project, in introduces new kind of technology and educating societies about engineering in other way. Later, three excellent points are brought out regarding this project; low floor, high ceiling and customization.

Writing Feedback / Some Daily Light Foods Trigger Serious Disease [2]

Emulsifiers is one of light foods such as ice cream, chocolate bar, bread, soda and margarine, ingredients that is used to gain the best texture of the food. Nonetheless, fact says that cancers are triggered through the mentioned substance. Emilie Viennois, has carried out a study toward Emulsifiers and find out that this stuff could make the consumers suffering chronic cancer-death disease since Emulsifiers can bear inflammation and colorectal cancer. Another conducted study stated that involved mice consumed Emulsifiers results the rodents having tumor.

Viennois suggests everyone to minimize the consumption of snacks and have a healthy diet in order to reduce the amount of dangerous chemical be eaten. Even though there is a regulation not to utilized Emulsifiers one to two percent in each product, no one can count how much Emulsifiers come to our body.

Source : cosmopolitan

Writing Feedback / Elephants Quantities over Eight-Year Period [3]

A breakdown of the information about the highest level of elephants quantities in nine different countries during eight-year period started from 1997 measured by thousand is presented in bar chart. Overall, it is really important to notice that apart from Cambodia and Laos, all of figures experienced a decrease. Meanwhile, India broke the record by dominating the trend.

The elephants number in both years was contributed by India as it reached roughly ten thousands in 1997 and hit eight thousands in the last year. It was then followed by Myanmar and Thailand who took the second and third place respectively in the former year. Nevertheless in 2004, Thailand saw a slight drop to around 1000. Interestingly, Malaysia and Sri Lanka experienced the same proportion in the first year whereas a converse appeared to be true in the other year.

Surprisingly, Cambodia was the only one country who saw an upward trend meanwhile Laos flattened out in both years. Furthermore, other elephant populations given by other nations was only a small proportion.

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Writing Feedback / The information on aging societies' numbers in three different developed countries during an century [2]

A breakdown of the information about aging societies' numbers in three different developed countries during a century, started in 1940 presented in the line graph measured by percent. At a glance, all figures show an upward trend meanwhile the Japan populaces' number dominates the trend.

Initially, there were roughly 10% of USA and Sweden societies are elderly people. Both of figures rose steadily in first 50 years to around 15%. While a contrast trend experienced by Japan as aging population decreased slowly to around 3% in 1980. Nevertheless, a remarkable incline is predicted will be faced by the latter in 30 next years since it rises its number considerably at present.

Furthermore, an intersection was experienced by Sweden and USA as the former figure overtook the trend by its rising level to 20% while the other party remained stable. The surprising trend will be offered by Japanese as it will dramatically rocket to over 25% and reach its peak thus therefore its exceed the other two figures.

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Writing Feedback / TED Summary _ It's Time for Women to Run for Office, Halla Tomasdottir [3]

Halla started her speech by presenting Iceland as the best place for women to live. She brought her audiences to look at the history where the first woman president governed her nation. She stated that by the president all of children who grow at that time get inspired including herself. Within years, she then becomes a candidate of four, the only one female candidate, to be a president in Iceland, so role model is the crucial thing to be owned. Next, she witnessed a day that a newspaper reported the changes percentages of each candidates, she cannot find her pictures on the news as her point is too low. Hence she decided to work harder and came to a mind that media, muscle and money take part on this election.

Halla then remark some points that lead her placing the second level of the percentage. The first is work hard followed by listening to your own voice and intuition. The next is team you take along, and time investment as well as attention. Hence, when women have a great desire to reach something, they absolutely will gain it since those points are paid much attention.

Writing Feedback / An Amazing Response Regarding The Election Day [2]

This summary is extracted from an article published on November 10, 2016. Its original title is "Starbucks CEO's Statement About The Election Will Make You Cry"

Starbucks's CEO and chairman, Howard Schultz, behaves to the election results wisely. Since he is in Hillary Clinton's side prior to the election day, it cannot be denied that Schrultz is also fascinated by the outcome of the "big Tuesday". Nevertheless, he professionally takes it easy by sending an email entitled "Onward Together" to his workers. The mail simply advises that inhabitants should move forward to live this beautiful life rather than stuck in a deep disenchantment. The CEO writes that as good societies, we need to give Trump a chance as he is given reliance by the majority of Americans. Then, the other humble advice come from Schultz is that he suggest Americans to build or create the country as what they wish by utilizing well-being to everyone. One pivotal thing that I adore by this leader is even though he genuinely stands for one party, he inevitably never forces other people two follow his choice even when he has huge power.

Writing Feedback / Alumni's proportion based on gender in Canada from 1992 to 2007 [2]

The given line graph indicates alumni quantities over fifteen-year period in Canada based on gender, measured by tens of thousand. At a glance, both figures experienced an upward trend. In any case, female students contributed the highest proportion.

From 1992 to 1995, male and female graduated scholars' numbers showed a slight increase by 5000, yet directly fell to almost 70,000 and 100,000 for male and female respectively in the three following years. Next, the significant changes were seen after 2000 in which alumni numbers increased dramatically to 150,000 by female figures and 100,000 by male figures.

Moreover, female student's level led the trend as in the end of period it rose a half of its starting point and therefore female scholar's quantities reached a peak to 150,000. Meanwhile, even though by 2007 male figures had increased almost by 30,000 as its peak, it only reached the lowest point by females'. Furthermore, the considerable gap was shown in which there were 50,000 women graduate's numbers above men.

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Writing Feedback / Guests' quantities on two music sites [4]

A breakdown of the information about visitor quantities regarding to new music sites presented in line graph measured by tens of thousands during fifteen days. At a glance, both of figures witness an upward trend meanwhile Pop Parade site is the most popular on the web.

Initially, Pop Parade guest's level experiences a slight drop for the first five days and keep falling down by 40 roughly in the two following days. In contrary, Music Choice's proportion shows a steady increase to 60 in the third day then remains stable for four following days. Moreover, the surprising trend is appeared to be true in the seventh day in which both figures hit its low to around 30. It is followed by a fluctuation by 10 and 20 for Pop Parade and Music Choice levels respectively.

Furthermore, a considerable gap between two parties widens up since a dramatic increase is contributed by Pop Parade's proportion by almost threefold. Likewise, an intersection happens in the second week as Music Choice visitants' volume rockets to 120 when the other party shows a slight drop to around 80. Additionally, the latter figure immediately overtakes the trend by double additional guest numbers and therefore it reaches its peak. Nevertheless, Music Choice declines by about 40 in the last day.

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Writing Feedback / There are four natural circle stages. Process of Silkworm's Life and Silk Cloth [2]

The given diagrams indicate the silkworm's life cycle and how it produces silk. At a glance, there are four natural circle stages started from eggs while the latter passes five linear steps to create silk cloth utilizing pupa.

Firstly, eggs from moth will hatch after it brooded within ten days to be a silkworm larva. Spending a month or one a half month consume mulberry leave, it then create silk thread covering their body. Later, before it needs double eight days to transform into moth and lay eggs, it spends approximately three to eight days to be a chrysalis.

Next, to produce a silk cloth, a pupa that is got from silkworm's cycle life is utilized. To get it loose, it is boiled in the hot water. After it is being stretched, a 300 - 900 m yarn then is created. Afterwards, before it dyed, it can be twisted first or being weaved.

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Writing Feedback / Writing Task II _ Creative and Practical Subjects are Essential for Students' Future [2]

It is pointless making children who lack artistic talent learn painting and drawing in Art classes at school. Instead, they should concentrate on other creative and practical subjects which they may have more aptitude. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, it is commonly found that there are many schools offering art subjects particularly painting and drawing. However, teaching some art subjects which students do not have any skill about it will completely be useless. Thus, I genuinely believe that teaching children creative and practical subjects will be far worthy since this kinds of matters facilitate students to improve their special skills and can directly be applied after graduation as well.

It is often said that instead of forcing students to learn some materials that they have no idea about, having creative and practical subjects in school is more essential as it does help students to develop their given abilities. The reason for it is because the aptitude is already owned by students school, thus school facilitate them to improve what has already existed. Besides, it will be easier for students to comprehend the subjects as they must have huge interest toward the field. Busan International School who already applied this method stated that even though a few students still involve hard-work in class, most of them finally mastered subjects since the materials are easy and loved by students. Hence, creative and practical subjects are worth to develop students' abilities.

It goes without saying that having practical subjects demand students to directly utilize what they have studied and ease them to apply for a job. They must have been familiar with any cases related to the subject because they are habituated to do so within ages. Besides, students will become an expert through the field doubt as being trained for a long time makes their skills be more perfect. This is supported by a conducted research held by Sony Firm, the biggest company who control all the agency corporations in Seoul, South Korea, found 67% of agencies joined Sony Firm has high quality workers as they are graduated from vocational schools. Thus, it is true that teaching children some practical subjects are more useful and needed by students in the future.

In conclusion, in order to offer a high quality people for the world without facing significant obstacles, having practical and creative subject in school is an effectively method through this case. I strongly suggest this approach to the all schools, particularly the one who is willing to have high prestige.

Writing Feedback / Top ten countries which won medals in the capital of UK 2012 Olympic Games [2]

The table below shows the number of medals won by the top ten countries in the London 2012 Olympic Games.

The presented table gives information about medals quantity that was obtained by top ten countries in the London 2012 Olympic Games. The rank was determined by the number of achieved gold medal. At a glance, gold and silver medals won mostly by United States thus it placed the first rank on this event.

The data shows that by 104 total medals achieved by United States, there were 46 gold medals, 29 silver and the rest was bronze. The second and third positions were taken by China and Great Britain as they owned 38 and 29 gold medals. Even though Russia showed its power by holding the highest number of bronze, it still came after China and Great Britain since it only won 24 gold medals. Besides, South Korea saved the fifth ranking as it possessed 13 gold medals.

With 11 gold medals, Germany and France placed the sixth and seventh rank on this event. The same case was also faced by Italy and Hungary as both of them won 8. Then the last placed was stolen by Australia who obtained 7 gold medals.

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Writing Feedback / Writing Task I _ Household's Basic Needs Expenses [2]

The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given pie charts compare household's basic needs expenses between 1950 and 2010. The data is measured by percentage. At a glance, money spent on housing and education experienced a significant drop while other figures increased significantly.

In 1950, expenses contributed mostly on housing where it took almost three fourth of the overall expenditures. It then followed by food that pulled 11.2% and education needs seized 6.6%. Whereas, 60 years later, the massive differences came from housing and education needs where they fell to 22% and 6.3% respectively.

Moreover, other figures such as health care, transportation and other that took only 2.4%, 3.3% and 4.4% respectively in 1950 improved noticeably. The expenditures of food rose over threefold increase to 34% and it then dominated the household expenses in 2010. Besides, healthcare experienced double improvement compared to 60 years ago. Next, transportation and other inclined considerably as well to 14% and 19.2% each figure.

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Writing Feedback / Clothing and health care expenses are not so big as expenditures for food, transportation, housing [2]

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in The United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.

The given bar chart indicates the amount of expenses spent on five common daily need categories in four different countries in 2009. It is measured by percentage. At a glance, apart from Japan, all figures contribute their shares to housing meanwhile health care and clothing seized the least earnings.

The data shows that American, Canadian and British spent their money mostly on housing where in United States people contributed over a quarter of their money and were the major contributor whereas in United Kingdom and Canada, the societies contributed approximately 24% and 21% respectively. By contrast, Japanese spent their money only 22% for housing but 23% on food. Next, transportation and food run after housing where except Japan in food, all countries' expenses did not reach over 20%.

Furthermore, all figures agreed to place clothing and health care on the last part of their expenditures. American, Canadian, British and Japanese averagely contributed their money not more than 6% on clothing. Besides, the same case also faced by health care category as people in United States spent only 7%, while in Canada, United Kingdom and also Japan, people's share did not even touch 5%. (193 words)

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