Writing Feedback / The quantities of goods moved using four kinds of means in the UK between 1974 and 2002 [3]

The graph below shows the quantities of goods transported in the UK between 1974 and 2002 by four different modes of transport.

TRANSPORT AND DELIVERY WITHIN UK

The line graph compare the quantities of goods moved using four kinds of means in the UK between 1974 and 2002, measured in million tones. Overall, it can clearly be seen that pipeline was the only mode that never experienced a decrease.

Road was used for the delivery of the highest quantity of commodity in UK, starting at 70 in 1974 and ending at just under 100 in 2002. it experienced decreases twice, from 72 to 70 between 1978 and 1982 and from 82 to 79 between 1991 and 1994. Meanwhile, the least amount was sent using pipeline. at first, it stood at only 5 then it kept increasing to 21 in 1995, followed by a stable trend afterward.

in the first 4 years, water and rail were almost at the same level, around 40, but in the next 7 years whereas rail decreased to 30, water rose to just under 60. Between 1986 and 1998, the rail fluctuated between 30 and 40 while the water declined slightly to around 50. the following years saw the surge, with water witnessing more significant rise than the other.

@holt please examine this writing. million of thanks for you

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Writing Feedback / Writing Task 1 - how many people took computer science at university of UK? [4]

The bar chart below gives information about the number of students studying Computer Science at a UK university between 2010 and 2012.

statistics of computer science study in UK

The bar chart describes how many people took computer science at university of UK. They are divided based on their gender and country's origin. It is noticeable that there were always more British students both in males and in females easy year while there was a sustained increase in all figures except in the figure of men in 2011.

In 2010, the number of male students from UK started at just under 40, 20 points higher than the number of international ones. The same trend occured in the category of females, in which the native ones were twice higher in their number than the overseas ones, at 30 and 15 respectively. There was a significant increase of local women by 15 in 2011 while the overseas female students rose slightly to just above 15. Meanwhile, in the male group, there was almost approximately 20.

The number of local and foreign learners increased remarkedly to above 35. In the contrary, the quantity of women's figures in both categories rose slightly to 45 for British and 20 for international students.

@holt, please examine this writing.

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Writing Feedback / Writing Task 2 - Travelling to other countries with appreciation for different customs [3]

Some people think visitors to other countries should imitate local custom and behaviors. Some people disagree, they think the house country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss the two views and give your opinion.

respect for locals and their culture

It may be true for some people traveling overseas have to follow behaviors and values believed by local society while others believe that the home country should appreciate different cultures brought by travelers. This essay will discuss the two points of view.

It is good for foreign people to imitate local custom and behaviors when they travel to other countries. It is a sign that they appreciate what local people believe and it will help them to mingle with everyone who lives there. In addition, it is undeniable that international tourists who behave locally can prevent themselves from conflict with local people because there will be no cultural clash between the local culture and theirs, and they will enjoy their traveling more. For example: to be accepted by the native, European people traveling to Islamic countries should not drink alcohol in public area because it is against Islamic values which forbid Muslim to drink it.

Apart from previous explanation, it is believed that a visited country should accept cultural differences due to several reasons. Foreign travelers may have a hard time and need to take a longer time to adjust to the local culture which is totally new for them so that native people cannot force them to behave as they do. In addition, appreciating new culture shows that local people have high tolerance level and are friendly to welcome anyone who has different behaviors and values. It will be beneficial to boost the number of tourists to that country.

In conclusion, while foreign people are required to appreciate and follow local values because it will help them to mingle easily with natives and have a more enjoyable visit, local people should also welcome other's cultures in order to make them comfortable to live in and increase the potential of their tourism sector.

@holt , please examine this writing

Writing Feedback / The controversy statement that American's airport left far away from other countries' airports [2]

America's airports are awful

After selected as the USA president, Donald Trump proved his controversy statement that American's airport left far away from other countries' airports, albeit it is tremendously right. Although the USA is the most powerful country in the world, Skytrax's data revealed that several well-knew airports such as New York JFK and Los Angeles ranked 59th and 91 the respectively in the world. Meanwhile, the best airport is Changi Airport, which has achieved such prestigious reward over the last three years.

Source: economist

Writing Feedback / TED Summary - The Internet Secret [4]

Edward Snowden on How We Take Back the Internet

Edward Snowden is a former National Security Agency staff who revealed confidential data to be accessed publically. His aim was to confide citizens the concealed data despite obliging the USA government to not access the privacy of internet users. While the information was employed to obtain the government's internet, they cooperated with several global companies such as google and Microsoft to transfer their user's data.

Source: youtube

Writing Feedback / Article Summary - New Investigation from Malaysia Airlines [2]

Dutch investigators strike blow against Russian fact free politics brought BUK

After Malaysia airlines shutting down by Russian missile on 17 July 2014, 298 people were killed in such incident. While Russia media reported that it was caused by Ukrainian rocket who actually wanted to shot Putin's plane, the Dutch-led Joint Investigation team argued the airline felt due to BUK warhead utilizing by the Russian army. Albeit, it was assumed as speculation and there was no abundant evidence.

Source: economist

Writing Feedback / Jamie Oliver has started a social project, called food revolution. [2]

Teach every child about food

Jamie Oliver has started a social project, called food revolution. It has a predominant purpose to help obesity sufferers getting special treatment as well as prevent it from being epidemic in the USA. Based on his observation, he revealed that most of the children did not recognize kinds of vegetables and they are more familiar with junk food. Furthermore, he stated at least 3 parties who have importance role to overcome such trouble, namely: home, school, and government. Firstly, parents must introduce children to fresh food and prevent them from consuming junk food regularly. Secondly, the school was required to provide organic meals which aim to mitigate the probability of obesity. Finally, the authority shall take a tough decision in minimizing children's junk food consumption.

Source: ted

Writing Feedback / The behavior of people gives more accurate data about what people like, than their clothes [3]

Q: some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

The majority of people regard that an essential factor to indicate what people like is by considering their preferred clothes. However, others argue that people cannot be assessed by their look while in my personal opinion, I believe that there is another measurement which is more effective to assess their interest. Meanwhile, This essay will discuss both views about such trend.

On the one hand, people will try to wear the clothes related with their preference and they are proud of it. They want to create public perspective about themselves while using a particular brand. Once people interact with the surrounding neighborhood, they attain an array of information pertained to their temperament. For example, people who use branded clothes will be judged possessing luxurious lifestyle. In my opinion, although it is an effective way to gain a particular data, there is another factor which should be taken into the consideration.

On the another hand, usually, people know what their friend like from their behaviors while it is the best indicator. People should carry out a regular observation to find out what a community want after that they end up with an outcome. Behavior's analysis will help people to find out data because it truly reflects what people love. Meanwhile, when people pay attention to people's clothes, it seems tricky to have accurate and trusted information due to the unknown condition. For example, a company requires all workers to wear smart dress code to work. As a result, people cannot assume that they are well-educated and have organized behavior.

In conclusion, while some argue that the appearance cannot reflect people's character, in my opinion, the behavior of people gives more accurate data about what people like because it gauges their personality more accurately.

Writing Feedback / The information about the air diffusion in a house and how it reduces heat [3]

Q: The diagram below shows how heat is lost and energy wasted in a house because of air getting into and out of the house. Summarize the information by reporting there main features and make comparisons where appropriate.

The given diagram illustrates the information the circulation of air in a house and how it reduces heat. It is noticeable that there are several types of equipment which mitigate the heat of temperature. In any case, the air is transmitted into varied rooms.

In the first, the air enters into a house trough several ways such as and outdoor faucet while windows are used to cash the light into washing room, the window is used to minimize the electricity consumption. In addition, the air leaking transmits into the door and window beside that electrical outlet and kitchen fan vent stimulates higher amount of air in the second floor. However, air taking out via plan which transfers it outside the house.

Moreover, the air is transferred into the roof before spreading out the house. In the kitchen and electrical outlet, the air is transmitted trough recessed lights and bathroom fan vent. While, attic hatch receives the air from the living room.

Please give me valuable inputs

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Writing Feedback / TED Summary - If superpowers were real: Super speed - Joy Lin [2]

If superpowers were real: Super speed - Joy Lin

Flash is the name of the superhero known by its ability to run reaching 25.000 mph. Although it seems possible to be done by a superhero, it will lead to several problems when ordinary people have such special power. Firstly, it will burn our whole body thanks to we crash oxygen consists of small molecules at a high level of speed. In addition, we will hit anything in front us because we move over 1.4 mps and cannot avoid them. Furthermore, if we want to help the girl who will be killed by a gun and we move her body before the bullet hits her, she will be dead due to she move at the speed of light even faster than it.

Source: youtube

Writing Feedback / The only objective of an enterprise is to generate profit, however, I disagree with that idea [2]

Q: The purpose of businesses is to make money and they should concentrate only on this. Do you agree or disagree?

The main objective of an enterprise is to generate profit. However, I disagree with that idea since the company is also responsible for improving employee's prosperity and society's living standards.

The company focuses on how to earn money and increase its profitability annually. It is thanks to they should rise and divide dividend to all investors who have funded operating business activities. In order to achieve the goal, they should allocate money to the commercial item instead of spend budget on something that has no return. Furthermore, the company should dominate the market. Although the company has been a market leader, who has had the biggest number of customers, they should design up-to-date business strategy to maintain their domination which aims to prevent new competitor enter the market and overtook their position.

Apart from previous explanation, the company has the importance role to improve the quality of living standards of their employees and society. It cannot be disputed that the employee is a company's asset and they should be threatened very well. Although they are uneducated people, the company's operation cannot run effectively without them. Once they attain special treatment and feel happy. It leads to increase company productivity as well as customer's satisfaction. Furthermore, people who live around the company should be one of the company's concerns. Although it does not automatically generate money, it will give positive impact in term of company image and reputation.

In conclusion, while some regard that the company should also concern on generating profit, I keenly disagree with such opinion because they have other responsibilities such as improving the employee's life and helping society who live around them.

Writing Feedback / The finding of two studies that aims to ask workers which the varied skills should they have. [2]

Writing Task 1 - Which communication skills are essential in your job?

The given table illustrates the finding of two studies, in 1997 and 2006. It aims to ask workers which the varied skills should they have. It is noticeable that in term of external communication, dealing with people had the highest number while listening carefully to colleagues was an essential ability to communicate with the internal party.

Selling product or service skill was the lowest percentage over the period of time, it was at 24 and 21 respectively. However, the skill of knowledge of particular products or services increased slightly from 35 to 41 and it overtook advising or caring for customers or clients in the second position in 2006.

Meanwhile, listening carefully to colleagues was a vital skill within the company. Its percentage increased significantly to just under a half in 2006. In contrast, making speeches or presentations was the most peripheral ability, however, its figure showed a slight increment by 4 in 2006.

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Writing Feedback / The electronic media impacts on the alteration of human behavior which tends to be more individual [3]

The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The electronic media has significantly developed over the last decades and it leads to the use of information technology being popular. While most people regard that this conveys negative consequences for the individual relationship between citizens, I firmly agree with that idea since it results in several serious problems for them.

The advance technology has several positive impacts which are to ease people to communicate. It is because even though it is high technology, it is friendly-user so everybody can operate it easily. It helps people to share any information which is accessible for everyone. Furthermore, it enables to have a face-to-face conversation online although they live in different countries. As a result, the way of communication is changed to be uncomplicated while its cost is more affordable.

On the other hand, it impacts on the alteration of human behavior which tends to be more individual. After many gadget applications are available on the internet, people more likely to spend a long period of time using their gadget, the trend impacts on their individual relationship. Although they have the opportunity to attract people around directly, they are too busy with their gadget and lack to attract with their family members. Furthermore, the relationship with people who live far away is more harmonious than close family since they tend to connect trough their mobile device than direct communication.Consequently, people will have a problem how to engage with society.

In conclusion, while some argue that the relationship of people will be fragile since the existing electronic device existing, I keenly agree with that issue since there are several problems will be occurred.

Writing Feedback / A personal interest cannot be the predominant reason to choose an occupation. [2]

To find work you love, don't follow your passion

After a research conducted, it revealed that the number of people who followed their passion for choosing an occupation has increased simultaneously. Although some argue that passion will lead to being success, the study reveals that following fervor results with 90 percent will be failed and it was known that personal interest cannot be a predominant reason to choose an occupation. However, current scholars concluded that "altruism" is an essential basis to select your career. It helps scholars to discover the purpose of life by doing a valuable activity to present superior world for all citizens.

source: youtube

Writing Feedback / TED Summary - What's the fastest way to alphabetize your bookshelf? [3]

What's the fastest way to alphabetize your bookshelf?

Most people have the same problem to arrange thousand of books alphabetically. Although it seems complicated and it takes a dozen days, there are several methods could be conducted. Firstly, we can start to swap the book based on the alphabet, it means that you locate the book which has "A" alphabet in the first sequence, it is called as bubble sort. Secondly, you randomly choose a book which is located in the middle of books as a partition, after that divide the books into two groups which are separated by the partition, move the books to the right if their alphabets come before the partition and move the rest of them after it. This method is the fastest way which is called as quicksort.

Source: youtube

Writing Feedback / The majority of companies regard that they should create regulation about their employee dress [4]

Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value the quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The majority of companies regard that they should create regulation about how their employee dress while others more focus on their working performance than worker's dress code. This essay will discuss two points of view regarding such issue.

On the one hand, the workers should well-dressed when they work in departments where they meet many people whether they came from inside or outside of a company. Those who work in marketing department have to dress properly when they have discussion with potential customers or investors as a measure to show company's professionality. Although the stakeholders are not familiar with the culture of the company, they know about that trough how the employees behave and prepare their appearance. As a result, employee's manner will help the industry to create a good image and increase its reputation.

On the other hand, people who are employed as an accountant and spend most of the time on the desk should concern more on their performance although the appearance comes into the play. During working, they do not interact with their members unless it is really needed. Because of that, they tend to focus on duty and avoid a crowded situation which can distract their concentration. Consequently, they are not required to notice their dress-code since it is not important indicator which contributes most to their performance while their quality of work is above all.

In conclusion, while some argue that employees who well-dressed can increase company's image and others tend to choose the quality of work as the key successful factor of a company. In my personal opinion, I believe that both aspects are essential aspects which cannot be separated

Writing Feedback / The feature of wind plants and where they are applied [3]

The diagrams below show the design for a wind turbine and its location.

The pictures illustrate the feature of wind plants and where they are applied. It is noticeable that the machine which is operated in high hill will produce higher megawatts. Meanwhile, they have the same type of equipment wherever people install them.

The wind plant consists of several importance components such as a blade, wind sensor, generator and computer. The wind generates blades are made from fiberglass or wood to rotate. As its movement, the generator starts to produce electricity almost 1.5 megawatts. Meanwhile, the wind speed and its direction are detected by the sensor which is applied to blades. The computer which is operated below wind turbine will control the movement of blades follow the wind direction.

However, the wind turbine is not only able to install in grassland but also in different places such as in coastal sea and in highland. If it is operated in top of mountain, it will produce higher amount of electricity which is 100 kilowatts

Writing Feedback / It is believed that English has removed other languages due to its popularity. [2]

TED Summary - The world's English mania - Jay Walker

The majority of people believe that English has removed other languages due to its popularity. However, English is used as the mean of communication by a global citizen, particularly to overcome world's issues such as climate change and poverty. Furthermore, people learn English to have a better quality of life. By learning it, they have bigger opportunity to be successful, having better salary and more prestigious job. It is reflected by almost 2 billion people in the world teaching and studying English. Even in the near future, China will become the world largest English speaking country.

source: youtube

Writing Feedback / Positive consequences and drawbacks of working before going to University [3]

Question:
Some suggest that young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the advantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this

Most people believe that work experience is the crucial factor for adolescent before continuing their higher education. I regard that it will convey positive consequences although there are several drawbacks could be occurred.

it has negative consequences such as lack of academic knowledge and negative psychological effect. Adolescent who have been working for such a long time in the company will lose their academic theories since they never review the materials. Although they get new insight regarding their job, they lose the knowledge which will be beneficial to study in university. Consequently, there is a big possibility that they will not be enthusiastic to continue study at university. Furthermore, they will have mental disorder since they must achieve the target and finish it based on the deadline. Although they can accomplish the tasks to be in order, they work under pressure and are stressful. It will be a harmful factor for their psychological development.

Apart from the previous explanations, It is not beneficial step for them due to several reasons. The first reason is to enlarge knowledge/skill. Although people who graduated from senior high school do not have capabilities needed by industries, they have strong motivation to sharpen their skill and gain knowledge that they have never heard. It aims to equip them with the special skill which will be the beneficial factor for their future. In addition, in order to pursue higher education, it needs a great deal of money. Although the government provides scholarship, its amount is extremally a limited amount. Therefore, young people should work to earn money and then save it to fund their tuition fee and living cost during a study.

In conclusion, while some argue that adolescent should not work before going to university. I believe that there is sufficient evidence to prove that its advantage outweighs its disadvantages.

Writing Feedback / Zaria Forman has dedicated herself to preserve indefensible places which are may soon extinct [5]

Drawings that show the beauty and fragility of earth

Zaria Forman has dedicated herself to preserve indefensible places which are projected will be extinct by climate change. It cannot be a dispute that there has been a proliferation of global warming over the last decades, therefore, she wants to witness changes in those sites until the time goes on. Her hope is to inform people to slow climate change. In addition, she has a tendency to persuade people to do so through art, it is because she believes that this easily touch people's feeling.

source: youtube

Writing Feedback / What hasppened with the Beagle Mars - new revelations [2]

Beagle Mars probe probably didn't crash, new analysis shows

After Beagle airplane arrived at Mars in 2003, the scientist did not receive any updated information, therefore they predicted it had damaged. However, after nearly a decade. They successfully detected its operation there, then started the project immediately. In this experiment, they applied the new method which hopefully results in the fascinating outcome, it is called reflection analysis. Furthermore, The solar panels are not only employed to fuel the airlines but also to measure the proportion of sunlight can be absorbed. In addition, after the airline has successfully landed on Mars, it has proved that NASA is the only one space agency which is capable of executing it.

Source:
newscientist

Writing Feedback / Summary TED - What can we learn from shortcuts? [3]

What can we learn from shortcuts?

While, most people argue that shortcut is the best way to reach our destination faster, Tom Hulme as businessman regard that shortcut is changed human behavior to be more indiscipline, because of that he wants everyone to realize that shortcut has a strong relationship with a design, and we need to create a unique feature to live disciplinarily.

Taking London as an example, there is a tiny road in the middle of the public garden. In order to arrive faster, young children pass the road and leave the path which was designed by the government. That activity results to a crucial problem which is destroying the land. The solution government provides is to plant a big tree as an obstacle for people across the street. It aims to support them to walk on provided path. Another fascinating example is policy taken by the University of California, all buyers should be mobile around campus, it prevents students to make shortcut when they have known the exact place.

Source: youtube

Writing Feedback / Summary Article - Speedy bat flies at 160km/h, smashing bird speed record [4]

Speedy bat flies at 160km/h, smashing bird speed record

Brazilian bat has become the fastest vertebrate animal after reaching of speed nearly 160 Km/h. It disputes the previous finding which revealed that bird fly 112 km/h, which made them faster than a bat. However, the research carried out by McCracken's team believed that they have discovered outcome which people had not heard of. They also argue that their measurement is precise, using the speed device which is usually used for the airplane. It is clear that this result invites many disagreements from other analysists who criticized that there was something wrong on estimating process of speed. The first scholar who has a different tendency is Prof. Graham Taylor, he remarked that this is untrusted information which none should know. However, some analysts regard that bat could fly under 160 km/h because it was helped by gravitation force, impacting to increasing their flying speed. He added that this is very possible because the research object was Brazilian bat which well-known by its ability to travel far away almost 50 km.

Source: newscientist