Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 2] Newly-invented technology VS the role of teacher at schools. [3]

Some people think computer and the internet are important in children's study, but others think can learn effectively in school with teachers. Discuss both side and give your own opinion.

Hello ES users, I'm gonna take the IELTS test as soon as possible, so I need several actionable pieces of advice.
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Education is a valuable investment for a great future. For this reason, several people argue that the newly-invented technologies are the significant aspects in children's study. However, critics claim that the great place to educate young people is at formal education. Therefore, I believe that both points of view have different perspectives.

Thanks to advanced technology, there are some advantages for schoolchildren. Firstly, technological devices in the classroom have undeniable links to academic performance. It is clear that the use of computers is the precursors to improve students' ability in computer science. In addition, computer and the internet arouse children's interest in new lessons. So, they will gain the novelty to operate a smart application such a word processor for writing report which is useful for their future. Lastly, the internet is an ideal place to do research. It provides many online resources which help students to acquire much detailed knowledge quickly.

However, schools engage many professional teachers in order elevating children's intelligence. Schoolteachers play an essential role to teach their pupils and to control children behavior in the classroom. Take William Henry Perkin, inventor synthetic dyes, as an example, he secured a place at one of the country's most prestigious seats of learning to read chemistry. Perkin's teacher identified his as having unusual intelligence and remarkable mental agility and his teacher encourage him to attend a series of lectures. In this opportunity, Perkin presented the impressive speech and made some expert breathtaking. From this reality, there is no doubt that schools are the effective place for children's education.

In conclusion, the development of latest technologies address some parents to channel their children with some sophisticated devices in educational area, whereas it is imperative that teachers' role in school cannot be changed by computers and the internet. Having said and that, I strongly deliberate that schools should concern in the collaboration between technological and traditional approach.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 : Wheat exports [2]

The line chart illustrates the amount of wheat exports for 5 years, from 1985 to 1990 and is measured in millions of tonnes.

It is noticeable that the total of wheat exports in the three countries fluctuated. However, the figures of European Community and Canada were of a significant increase over the period, while the amount of wheat exports in Australia showed on negatively correlated.

The highest total of wheat exports belonged to Australia in 1985, then followed by European Community standing at just under 20 million tonnes. In term of wheat exports, Australia as the lowest exporter was 15 million tonnes compared to the two other countries.

A closer look at the data reveals that the total of wheat exports in Canada inclined sharply from around 17 million tonnes to 25 million tonnes between 1986 and 1988, a rise of about 13 million tonnes in 3 years. By 1987, the figure of wheat exports in European Community and Australia broke the equal record at approximately 15 million tonnes. Furthermore, by 1989, the total of wheat exports in Canada had gradual rebound to the same amount in 1986 and overtook that for European Community's figure. In any case, the amount of wheat exports in Australia experienced a slow downward until the end of period.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS TASK 2] Young people should be under surveillance on parents' discipline [2]

In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

School is the second home for some students. Moreover, in the some parts of this world, teenagers have less free time and are engaged in many duties in their studies. While this situation is addressing young people in some problems, some measures are being taken to tackle this problem by parental and educational involvement.

Teenagers have a pretty hectic schedule because many assessments have to be finished at the strict deadline. So, young people tend to kill their spare time doing homework and attending some private courses. With those activities, they are expected to gain a great mark in school. Taking Japanese schoolchildren as an example, they join in an intensive math course which is a difficult lesson. It happens because parents force children to achieve high educational achievement. If their children fail to earn an excellent score, they will punish them. It can be seen from parents' tendency that educational record is the measurement of person's success. As a result, teenagers bear the high pressure in many educational activities which spend their free time.

Having said and that, some solutions can be taken to solve this problem. Firstly, school should create a positive learning atmosphere which results in sense of competition in school. The complete facilities which are provided help students doing the assignments such as library and computer laboratory. In addition, parents hold an essential role in children's behavior. They have to teach their children to be disciplined on each schedule which adjusts children's daily activities. Finally, the responsibility of teachers plays a strong influence to drive young people in proper manner. Teachers must have power to impose a fine upon disruptive students. It can be concluded that those solutions help students to overcome the difficulties which make them under pressure and reduce their leisure time.

To sum up, the causes which bring young people in the terrible situation appear from parents and school's circumstance. However, young people should be under surveillance on parents' discipline in order to spend their free time well.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 1] The line chart shows popularity of fast food among Australian young people [2]

Australian teenagers' consumed of different kind of fast food is illustrated in the line chart and it is measured the times eaten per year.

It is noticeable that the number of times eaten per year between pizza and hamburgers increases significantly, while the figure of fish and the amount of chips consumed is reverse.

In 1975, fish and chips consumption was the highest number of times eaten. Then followed by hamburgers, this figure recorded at about 15 times. In terms of pizza experienced the lowest number of time eaten per year approximately 8 times. Like pizza, this figure for hamburgers consumed by Australian teenagers was a dramatic incline in 1980. In any case, by 1985, the number of hamburger consumed reached a peak at just above 80 times and had a significant movement onward.

Turning to the figure for fish and chips consumption, in 1985 this figure had gradual rebound to the same times eaten in 1975. After a sort peak, the number of fish and chips which was consumed by Australian teenagers decreased gradually from around 90 times to approximately 38 times between 1985 and 2000, a drop of about 53 times in 15 years.

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Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 2] Pollution and damage of environment are resulted from a country developing. [6]

Some people think pollution and damage of environment are resulted from a country developing and becoming richer, and this is hard to be avoided. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

People's activities change the atmosphere and environmental condition. Many people regard that in a non-globalized country, a significant improvement in all sectors, results environmental damaging and air pollution. Personally, I strongly believe that this argument can be accepted.

In the one hand, the development in poverty country can effect environment. A developing country adheres to its principles to establish all sectors in order for playing an economic drive. This can be seen in one country in which becoming richer founds many industrial companies to provide abroad income. An economic growth in this country arouses Samsung's interest, the largest multinational company, to open a new branch in. In fact, this requires many raw materials to resemble a newly- invented technology such as smart phone and portable computer. Those have a tendency for using harmful chemical which can be a precursor of endangering many species of plants and animals. As a result, some areas in this country will damage in certain period.

On the other hand, pollution and damaged of environment are not only resulted by the development in a developing country. Firstly, human behavior is the crucial aspect which has to be investigated and be reformed in term for keeping environmental health. Throwing rubbish in the river and cutting down many plants in the forest exemplifies why environment in developing country is being vanished. So, those habits increase the number of air pollution significantly. In addition, using artificial fertilizer for farming can damage soil. Finally, disaster is the strong possibility of environmental damage which usually demolish many plants and animals such as eruption of volcanoes and hurricane storm.

In conclusion, environmental problem appears for many causes and the development of country also gives a contribution. However, I believe people awareness should be engaged to solve this problem.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 1] Strategic area for a new school in the town of Canterbury. [4]

The map below is of the town of Canterbury. A new school (S) is planned for the area. The map shows two possible sites for the school.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map depicts the city planning in the town of Canterbury where are connected with two areas; Chartham and Sturry. There are three public zones; educational facility and infrastructural public transportation. Overall, there are two strategic areas which will be built a new school in the town of Canterbury.

To begin, 5km is the distance from Sturry to planned site for S1 with 7,000 populations. S1 area is located between Housing and Countryside zone. Moreover, the university can be seen in the northeast of the S1 area and in the west there is Town Centre. The main road connects from Town Centre to Sturry.

In any case, planned area for S2 is situated in Town Centre which is no traffic zone. S2 area, which has a population of 4,500, lies 7km from Chartham and running along from the S2 planned area to Chartham is main road. This area is covered by Housing and Countryside zone and university is located in the north of S2 site.

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Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 2] Technologies have suggested everyone in the world. [4]

It has been suggested that everyone in the world wants to own a car, a TV and a fridge. Do you think disadvantages of such a development outweigh advantages?

Some newly-invented technologies have been taking a part in human life. A car, a television and a fridge is being basic needs to overcome daily routine for many people. While I believe that this phenomenon provides some merits, demerits also appear to be a precursor of lack activities.

In the one hand, watching a television, driving a car and keeping foods in a fridge gives convenient life for some people. Firstly, most workers spend almost their whole day to work with the pretty tight schedule in the office. Then, they need a source of amusement to make them bursting into laughter, and television is the great companion when they lay in the sofa and eat some snacks. In addition, in the some metropolitan countries in the world have a problem which relates with traffic congestion and the high level of crime in busy main road. Indonesia, for example, does not have excellent public transport which can deliver everyone on their own destination. So, private car is the best preference for some people who have much money. Also, for working mother in the world, frozen foods are to be a choice when they do not have enough time to rustle up a meal. Indeed, they need a fridge to keep their meals fresh for several days.

On the other hand, some sophisticated devices make people illness. For some children, television programmes are excellent powers of imagination. There are some animation programmes which catch toddlers' attention to waste their time in front of television. Those give a strong influence to abandon their assignment and turn to be a disease such myopia. In any case, the police department in the some countries in part of the earth record more than a hundred accidents in 2012 which occur of driving a car. This result is an evident that many drivers cannot take priority over safe drive. Moreover, climate change happens from some causes and the negative ion of refrigerator is a factor which conducts the diminution of ozone layers. It can be conclude from these reasons that advanced technologies run into trouble.

In conclusion, several technologies are valuable when people use them to help chores activities properly, whereas it can be lack tools when people cannot set on their own needs. However, self awareness to deal with those tools should be concerned in order for safety.

Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 1] The proportion of energy from coal [4]

The graph shows the proportion of energy that was produced from coal in four European countries from 1995 to 2010.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph illustrates the percentage of energy produced from coal in 4 European countries during 15 years, between 1995 and 2010.

It is noticeable that the percentage of coal energy in three countries decline simultaneously. However, the figure of coal power in Denmark shows the reverse over the period.

The highest percentage of power produced from coal was recorded by Denmark in 1995. Then followed by Germany, this figure for coal energy stood at under 60%. In terms of percentage of energy produced from coal, France as the lowest percentage was 30 percent of all countries. Between 1998 and 2001, the percentage of coal power experienced a dramatic decrease in Sweden, France, Denmark and Germany.

A closer look at the data reveals that the percentage of coal energy which is produced in three European countries remained reasonably stable from around 28% to 20% between 2004 and 2007. Standing in contrast, the proportion of energy produced from coal in Germany saw a sharp downward from approximately 15 percent to 5% between 2004 and 2007, a drop of about 10% in 3 years.

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Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 1] the number of population in three different countries - biggest in Washington [3]

The graph below shows the population change between 1940 and 2000 in three different counties in the U.S. state of Oregon.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph shows the number of population in three different countries in the United States of Oregon; Columbia, Yamhill and Washington during 6 decades, between 1940 and 2000, and it measures in thousands. It is clear that the population in three countries show a significant increase during the period.

The number of population in Columbia recorded the lowest in the state of Oregon, while the figure of Washington was the highest number of population 75,000 people in 1940. In terms of population, the number of population in Yamhill stood at the second position 30,000 people.

A more detailed look at the line graph shows that the number of Washington people inclined sharply from just over 120,000 people to above 240 thousand people between 1970 and 2000, a rise more than double the number of population. By contrast, the number of Columbian people experienced a steady incline, from approximately 25,000 people in 1940 to about 33 thousand people. Interestingly, the figure of population in Columbia and Yamhill had similar patterns which were a significant upward.

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Writing Feedback / [IELTS Task 2] Text messages or phone calls; I prefer talking on the phone [3]

Compare and contrast sending text messages and talking on the phone. Which do you prefer, and why?

These days, there are many ways to communicate with each other. Text messages and phone calls are the ways which have changed people keeping touch. However, I regard that there are several merits and demerits of each method.

For a variety of reasons, people tend to make a phone call to give snippets of information. Clarity is the main reason why people believe that talking on the phone is better that sending a text message. For some couples who do a long-distance relationship make a phone call using a smart application,skype, can be deliriously happiness to share their daily routine due to her or his voice can be heard. This application provides free phone call which can connect easily every time and everywhere. Moreover, talking on the phone reduces misconception which usually appears when people send text message. Taking email an example, a purchasing staff send an email to order stationary such as paper and pencils. She or he writes some abbreviation words in electronic mail and those make mistake to catch the main point. As a result, telephone is useful device to communication.

On the other hand, text messages are the popular communication method which can integrate many people. Firstly, smartphone users are closer with many instant messaging such as whatsapp and blackberry messaging. They can create a group, and invite other users to share information. In addition, sending text messages is more economically to compare with talking on the phone. Lastly, messaging applications have a conversation record as an evident, so they can review what they said in abroad agreement. It is obvious that some features of instant messaging lead efficiency in communication.

In conclusion, communication with text messaging and phone call has benefit as well as negative. So, people should pay attention when they do a communication. Personally, I prefer talking on the phone rather than sending a massage.