Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback [29222] - page 467 of 488

Writing Feedback

Research advice on TOEFL, SAT, IELTS, GRE and other academic essays (page 467)

Threads | Replies
No Driving Licenses for People Under 18 - Argumentation/ Persuasion Essay

4 - Haha, I would argue that kids should be allowed the right to drive as early as 15 if they...

Writing Feedbacknewuser1 - Jun 29, 2009 / Mustafa1991 - Jun 30, 2009
"Going overseas for the university" essay

7 - Why thank you. I'm afraid it doesn't bode well for the essay, though. When your reader's first thought is...

Writing Feedbackzeny - Jun 27, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 30, 2009
Libraries are not just a collection of books: Are public libraries important?

4 - People still do this? I thought going off-line would result in a horrible death by some form of...

Writing Feedbackiris1 - Jun 27, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 27, 2009
IELTS essay: Newspapers will soon become a thing of the past

7 - For this sort of essay, a completely one-sided argument is generally okay, and easier to write. In general, though,...

Writing Feedbacktrangquynh - Jun 26, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 26, 2009
1st essay in 13 years. Disadvantages that working mothers give to their children

12 - I wasn't offended by your essay. I was trying to point out that it is not a black...

Writing Feedbackdhachem - Jun 25, 2009 / Notoman - Jul 9, 2009
Your decision to enter the education field - CBEST Essay pratice

10 - I'm not so sure: Mark Twain wrote several humorous essays in the first person voice of a wrong-headed narrator....

Writing Feedbackrolandj727 - Jun 23, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 25, 2009
"tip the waiter" essay - what have you learnt from a mistake?

9 - Should we tip the waiter?". "Okay.", he said. Outside the restaurant, we (me and my 4 friends) were...

Writing Feedbackchintan - Jun 21, 2009 / Liebe - Jun 25, 2009
Social Work Theory, Skills and Methods Assignment

6 - Post the essay you submitted originally, and the comments you got back on it. That way we can give...

Writing Feedbackelzbietabielec - Jun 21, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 30, 2009
The relationship between an organization and environment - essay

9 - The first sentence is awkward, due to the lack of an article in front of "business environment" and the...

Writing FeedbackTarunPathak - Jun 21, 2009 / EF_Simone - Aug 28, 2009
Narrative essay- important decision for CBEST Pormpt

2 - First I will talk about content and then about grammar and style. You've made a good choice concerning which...

Writing Feedbacksapst21 - Jun 16, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 17, 2009
a baby doesn't know the intricacy of external world; TOEFL IBT Essay "Parents are the best teachers"

6 - Content-wise you could shore up your essay by defining what exactly you mean by "best teacher" before attempting to...

Writing FeedbackHVC - Jun 16, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 17, 2009
CBEST Essay using technology prompt

8 - The handbook I am using is the one created and required by a major U.S. university. Again, Sean, your...

Writing Feedbackrolandj727 - Jun 15, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 16, 2009
TOEFL Writing: 2 short essays (reading versus doing things; Neighbors)

6 - I agree with Sean, I have seen in TOEFL essays this type of starting some time confuses the...

Writing Feedbackbon - Jun 15, 2009 / biggestv - Jun 18, 2009
TOEFL Essay on why people want to study (give me any comment on my following essay)

8 - Sean, thanks for giving me further clarification. Any other comment, please let me know....

Writing Feedbacklinjuncai - Jun 14, 2009 / linjuncai - Jun 16, 2009
Cultural psychology short paper

9 - When Sean asks you to say the same thing in fewer words, he is asking you to write more...

Writing Feedbackcarlychan - Jun 13, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 16, 2009
The Advantages of Capital Punishment-- very short essay --

6 - thank you.......

Writing Feedbacksilentheart - Jun 12, 2009 / silentheart - Jun 16, 2009
Yet another CBEST Essay - an unforgettable person you have encountered in life

4 - This is not the essay that I wrote for the CBEST test. I have been working to improve since...

Writing Feedbackrolandj727 - Jun 12, 2009 / rolandj727 - Jun 12, 2009
My first essay exercise - "we learn our most important lessons in school?"

7 - thanks a lot, Special thanks to Mustafa1991. I know this article is far from perfect. But there are only...

Writing FeedbackHellANgel - Jun 10, 2009 / HellANgel - Jun 13, 2009
CBEST: Technology today has been positive or negative impact?

16 - Actually, I think you have done a very good job of showing that the creation of the atomic bomb...

Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jun 10, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 24, 2009
TOEFL - modern society has become more complex, so it is essential for the young people

10 - Hmmmm . . . it seems that you are writing to a formula, in which you use the same...

Writing Feedbacklibo_for - Jun 10, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 19, 2009
Essay response to Thoreau - "Does adulthood takes away the true spirit of life?"

5 - Threre are plenty grammar errors. For example: - convey a sense of nostalgia *for* - childhood is...

Writing Feedbackcarladguez - Jun 9, 2009 / Mustafa1991 - Jun 10, 2009
CBEST personal essay - an unforgettable person you have encountered in your life

13 - Notice: Several people have now repeatedly told you to omit that first paragraph, which says nothing. That's good advice....

Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jun 9, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 11, 2009
ielts essay: Should students be taught to compete or to cooperate?

5 - Don't call your mistakes "stupid." Making mistakes is how we learn. I'm glad you are feeling more confident....

Writing Feedbackwudan - Jun 9, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 10, 2009
TOEFL - should history be a mandatory course to university students?

5 - But how would this be of any use to international students? Bear in mind that universities often have a...

Writing Feedbackrealele - Jun 9, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 10, 2009
A paragraph to persuade someone not to smoke

3 - You might also want to add more details to make your paragraph more persuasive. "Five million people died last...

Writing Feedbackferocious12 - Jun 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 8, 2009
How can I play into the hands of my Maker - Sunday Morning   2

51 - Yes, you have great potential as a writer, and should definitely keep on recording your thoughts. Starting new reflections...

Writing FeedbackRajiv - Jun 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
Essay about: what would you change of your former high school?

14 - Whenever I hear the word school, I immediately visualize phrases like exams, presentations, essays, textbooks, or dictations, rather than...

Writing Feedbackivan9210 - Jun 6, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 24, 2009
IELTS Writing - "clean learning environment"

3 - Be careful, too, that you don't get off topic. The prompt doesn't assert that an attractive and clean learning...

Writing Feedbackbon - Jun 6, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 6, 2009
Making life better

5 - Yes, yes it is. :-) Feel free to post a revised draft here for more feedback....

Writing Feedbackbon - Jun 6, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 8, 2009
Essay on the Types of Germs - bacteria

22 - I like the quotation you used. Perhaps you should cite it, according to whatever format you are supposed to...

Writing FeedbackHaya - Jun 4, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 19, 2009
descriptive essay-The heart of the Matter.

6 - In need of some revision: "An inspiring, strong, and caring person has a lot to offer, especially if...

Writing Feedbackpnkberrychmpgne - Jun 4, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 5, 2009
Traveling in a group led by a tour guide give us a safe, useful and exciting excursion & save time

7 - Or Tour guides possess professional knowledge of an city that allows them to avoid dangerous areas....

Writing Feedbackthinhthanh92 - Jun 4, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 9, 2009
Help with a paragraph about marketing claims

7 - Hi all, Thanks for all the comments. Regards, Fizzi...

Writing FeedbackFizzi - Jun 4, 2009 / Fizzi - Jun 5, 2009
Socials Essay: Robespierre and Cromwell Which is a more effective leader?

7 - Your main problem is that you are comparing these two people in terms of the effectiveness of their leadership,...

Writing Feedbackicemaster2340 - Jun 3, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 4, 2009
a pretty short story, Return of satan

5 - Some minor fixes for you: "and argued that Satan was damned forever and he would never deserve to...

Writing Feedbacknewsha31 - Jun 3, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 3, 2009
Test essay: Should children obey authority?

7 - Others think controlled children are not well-prepared for children's adult life into make the important decisions of their lives...

Writing Feedbackxinyuqingxin - Jun 2, 2009 / ferocious12 - Jun 4, 2009
IELTS essay : Nowadays majority of people are trying to live in the cities

6 - You have a decent essay structure, and while you do have some grammatical errors, they tend not to interfere...

Writing Feedbackferocious12 - Jun 2, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 8, 2009
"the disparity (gap) between rich and poor" - sample writing

4 - I like the way you focus on the difference in the two camps' views of wealth. The redistributionists subscribe...

Writing Feedbackcarladguez - Jun 2, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 3, 2009
ielts essay - Useing animals for the benefit of the human beings

4 - Simone makes an excellent point -- you haven't presented any compelling arguments for your thesis. Making your case shouldn't...

Writing Feedbackxinyuqingxin - Jun 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 2, 2009
ielts essay: should governments pay university course fees?

3 - This is better than your other essays, as it has a clear thesis with some decent reasons to back...

Writing Feedbackxinyuqingxin - Jun 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 2, 2009
itels essay: should children learn foreign language from elementary school?

7 - To sum up, though teaching the elementary school students foreign languages pose a threat to thehas risk for the...

Writing Feedbackxinyuqingxin - May 31, 2009 / ferocious12 - Jun 2, 2009
April's first day essay - A Quick Grammer Check

5 - My bus driver continues that, if anyone thinks he/she can't do it just tell him. It kind of tempts...

Writing Feedbacknewsha31 - May 31, 2009 / ferocious12 - Jun 2, 2009
Random weightlifting reflection piece.

3 - I'd say you should flesh out the essay a bit more, possibly adding narrative elements to the beginning and...

Writing FeedbackMond - May 31, 2009 / EF_Sean - May 31, 2009
I came to knew about Jesus at young age; My salvation testimony - kindly edit.

4 - thank you guys for the quick replies....

Writing FeedbackAlfred - May 31, 2009 / Alfred - May 31, 2009
'useless in applying theories'; Daily homework is not necessary for students

5 - Thanks a lot . I will change my point to make it more believable....

Writing Feedbackeric_ly - May 30, 2009 / eric_ly - May 31, 2009
People should read only those books which are real events& real person

10 - It's really difficult to make a determination on that without actually seeing the essay. In general, grounding your essay...

Writing Feedbackbiggestv - May 29, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 2, 2009
Critical essay about Persepolis.

2 - Persepolis is such a wonderful book! I'm glad to have this opportunity to review an essay about it. I...

Writing Feedbackannedoherty - May 29, 2009 / EF_Simone - May 29, 2009
Journal essay (welfare state)

3 - Hi Geoff, Kindly find my help below; If I was Head of State of any given (state...

Writing FeedbackGeoff - May 28, 2009 / justivy03 - Apr 9, 2015
People want stay healthy. Health is must to enjoy the life to the fullest.

7 - Notoman, That is such excellent advice!! Thank you for participating so actively in peer editing. That's what makes this...

Writing Feedbackbiggestv - May 28, 2009 / EF_Simone - May 29, 2009
Australian Gold Rush: Introduction writing

16 - Hey Notoman, thanks for mentioning the plagiarism detector. I knew such software existed, but I didn't know there was...

Writing Feedbackjgv115 - May 28, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 14, 2009
If you could invent something new, what product would you develop? (TOEFL essay)

10 - Bear in mind too that the TOEFL isn't a one shot deal. If you don't do well the first...

Writing Feedbackbiggestv - May 27, 2009 / EF_Sean - May 28, 2009
Essay on the legal drinking age

8 - Your essay come up with a very different way of presentation. I loved it. I will use it...

Writing Feedbackkokujampo - May 25, 2009 / biggestv - May 28, 2009
Causes of Global Financial Crisis

3 - While moderating here, I have often found myself recommending three books over and over again: Stechen King's On Writing,...

Writing Feedbackferocious12 - May 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - May 26, 2009
WPE --The minimum wage in the U.S.

5 - Yes, that's the one. You know that there are reasons to increase minimum wage (protect workers from exploitation)...

Writing Feedbacksapst21 - May 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - May 26, 2009
[TOEFL ESSAY ] Should the Government Provide Free College?

4 - Thank you sooooo much. It helps me a lot. :)...

Writing Feedbackrjsdndi - May 24, 2009 / rjsdndi - May 25, 2009
History, Royal Engineer essay.

6 - You also need to work on integrating your quotations better. "The following quote proves my point" is a horrible...

Writing Feedbackeddy9898 - May 23, 2009 / EF_Sean - May 28, 2009
Toefl: Is this good enough to get 24 score in writing section.

3 - Aye, the more concise the better, as multiple writers have noted. However, your fix for the sentence changes his...

Writing Feedbackbiggestv - May 23, 2009 / EF_Sean - May 24, 2009
Clep essay-Laws should not be rigid or fixed. Instead, they should be flexible.

4 - Your essay is very general and need specefic examples. Your grammer still need improvement. so I think to improve...

Writing FeedbackIndian - May 22, 2009 / biggestv - May 27, 2009
TOEFL - Prefer to work for a large company; good material rewards

7 - Actually, it is generally a good idea to avoid labeling your conclusion with one of those phrases. It should...

Writing Feedbackwing - May 22, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 6, 2009
CLEP English Comp. -- "That Government is Best Which Governs Least"

5 - Essay is very nice, I am also planning to take the same test. Your essay helps me knowing some...

Writing FeedbackTWRTW106 - May 21, 2009 / Indian - May 22, 2009

Home / Writing Feedback

Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
✖
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳