Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Color is Not The Predominant Aspect in Determining Buyers' Decision [2]

Color is a powerful tool that is used to great effect by manufactures and retail companies when they try to sell us something. In fact, many of the purchasing decisions we make are partly or largely influenced by color. How true is this statement? How much does color influence us when we buy something?

It is generally argued that color has a significant influence in several companies' determination when products are offered to customers. The majority of buyers today tend to purchase sorts of commodities based on their colors. Although it is true for some extents, I would argue that there are several aspects such as the excellence and the cost that have a stronger effect on stuffs which are purchased.

Encouraging consumers to choose the best commodities which are provided in the markets based on their color is inevitable for many companies. Since different colors present various conditions of products, especially food, people tend to decide buying diet in certain colors. For example, a red chili is often purchased by the housewife than green ones as the red color indicate the rope of vegetable. In reverse, there are several indicators which play more essential role in determining the costumers' decision when buying products.

The quality and the price are the main factors that affect noticeably people decision. It is because some people require high living standards, particularly in their dishes as the prime need. They also are keen on a lower price product as they can save their money to another necessity. An Empirical Study of Perceived Factors Affecting Customer Satisfaction in China in 2015 proved that price and quality are the predominant factor influencing shoppers' attitudes towards offered commodities.

In conclusion, even though colors tend to impress people's attention as they provide a specific meaning of commodities, the degree of excellence of products and the economic aspects are often to be a consideration for majority of people when they purchase sorts of goods.

Writing Feedback / Developing a law to restrict smokers' zone is very beneficial to reduce the passive smoking effect [4]

In some countries it is now illegal to smoke in public places. It is only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. Do you agree or disagree?

Smoking has been forbidden legally in public areas such as gardens, restaurants, public transports, and hospitals in several parts of the world. I would agree that it is a right method to preserve passive smokers and young generation from harmful effects of cigarettes' smoke.

The essential reason why smoking in public places is illegal is preventing others' health from breathing smoke of cigarettes. It is because cigarettes' smokes consist of various danger substances such as nicotine, benzene, and tar which lead people getting serious medical problems such as heart attack and bronchitis. A survey in Paris showed that more than 600,000 passive smokers who breathe cigarettes' smokes intensively die every year.

Children are driven directly to unhealthy habit is an essential reason to forbid people smoke everywhere. Although the majority of adults in children's neighborhood show smoking as a part of their lifestyle, children can be protected carefully since there is a real law to restrict smokers' zone which teaches them that smoking is hapless activity. In my country, Indonesia, most of public areas such as shopping center and restaurants provide free smoke area, especially in children zone to protect their health and show them that serious disease will be occurred if they use it.

All in all, producing a law to restrict smokers' zone is very beneficial to reduce the chance for others becoming second-hand smokers and protect children' healthy lifestyle early since smokers are surrounded by the strict alarms which are legal to be convicted. Where, possible, some awful punishments should be taken into deliberation.

Writing Feedback / Is deleting art subjects for students who do not have specific abilities an appropriate decision? [2]

It is pointless making children who lack artistic talent learn painting and drawing in Art classes at school. Instead, they should concentrate on other creative and practical subjects which they may have more aptitude. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often believed that deleting Art subjects for students who do not have specific abilities such as drawing and painting is an appropriate decision. It is because students should be taught any subjects that can improve their original capacity practically. I would agree that a better achievement can be reached in school when this point of view is applied as just a few of children who are capable doing plenty of various tasks and they need to focus on one subject to achieve the best performance.

Constraining students who do not have suitable skills in Art school subjects is inappropriate decision for students' growth. It is because art skills such as painting and sketching are not owned by every child and require a great technique which is formed in long process, so it is difficult to reach a significant result for lower learners. Based on research in New York, just a few of children who have balance ability both right and left brain. If they master science and mathematics, they tend to lack art capacity as they are not good in multi-tasking.

Specific natural ability of children should be improved in their classes to reach the immense progress in their formal education. Due to the reason that children are multiple intelligence, they have own talent as their special aptitude which is should be guided and directed in school. My friend is a talented footballer as he exercises frequently in his leisure time, while school does not provide appropriate time to improve his ability because school subjects requires him to learn many aspects within just several minutes for sport subject, especially football.

In conclusion, locating children in certain courses which offer the most appropriate improvement for their aptitude is better than forcing them to study many subjects that they cannot present their acts since there is a limitation in their capacities.

Writing Feedback / Wealthiness is not the only motivation to be loyal in a company - Ielts2 [2]

Do you agree that money is the only motivation at work why people prefer working in the same company for many years?

Finance is generally believed as the most predominant aspect which affects the loyalty of employees. While this is true to some extents, I would disagree with this statement since there are other factors such as the surrounding and readability which present a significant effect on staffs' decision to show their dedication in company.

Friendly environment has noticeable influence in determining workers' loyalty in corporations. It is because a conformity and strong emotion are offered that can improve their solidarity in working time, more than work relationship. A survey in America proved that 70% of people who work in enjoyable groups tend to stay in same company for over 10 years since they experience a priceless interaction with their team and there is no guarantee that they will find a similar or more comfortable situation if they alter their organization

Gaining interest in occupations encourages people to spend most of their time in their permanent working location. Since they are really keen on their working field, like they do their hobby, they never feel bored and tired to face monotonous surroundings. My uncle is an employee in Food Company since 7 years. As cooking is one of his hobbies, he find working in this place very enjoyable. He is never tired, although his job requires him to perform in constant environment.

All in all, even though some argue that people will prefer to work for a longer period in company which provides a large amount of salary, getting a compact teamwork and satisfaction in jobs presents a higher desire to be loyal in enterprises.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Interviews are not the best method to select the applicants [2]

Most employers interview candidates before hiring them. Do you think this is the best way to do it? In your opinion, what is the best method for choosing employees?

Most companies decide to recruit many applicants based on an interview test. This essay will argue that this is not the most suitable method because the measurement of person's capacities cannot be determined by their words and the best method is requiring an objective test to assess their proficiency.

Interview is not an effective way because it does not provide an opportunity for interviewee to perform their best ability. The skills tested in interview do not cover all aspects that have to master by employees since just a communication skills such as how to answer question appropriately can be measured. For instance, a technically experts such as programmers are rare to build a communicative discussion since their work only connect them with many computers, so they will face an awkward moment in their interview, while there is no chance for them to show their great skills.

Discovering the ability of applicants by applying aptitude test as the one of selection series is the most appropriate way to measure their capability. This is because specific skills of candidates can be shown clearly which allow them to be located in suitable position. For example, people who want to be a secretary in office should be tested about their ability in operating computer properly and understanding how to arrange documents and data clearly since it will be their main duties when working in the real job.

All in all, interviews have boundaries as they often test interviewing skills rather than occupation related abilities and the more appropriate method is requiring a test which can figure the real challenges that should be passed in any jobs.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Encouraging Industries and Businesses to Move to Regional Areas [2]

In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Some would argue that locating industry and business areas in the countryside brings drawbacks for many factories. This essay will argue that although lack customers can be occurred, the positive effects of providing a job and equalizing the population growth far outweighs any demerits.

Reconstructing large factories and companies from central city to countrified area can reduce their popularity in public. This is because modern inhabitants in a great town cannot access easily the new location as it is located in not well-known area. In my country, Jakarta as the capital city is the most appropriate location for business since it provides an immense population density where people are more consumerist. When the location is altered, a smaller demography presents little attention about this business. However, by several decades, this place will be more crowded since this industry is growing every year and inhabitants will adjust to be more dependence on products which are produced.

Building the novel industry outside the city center creates a job opportunity and helps the government to arrange the population. Local people who live around the new location of industry are recruited to be a staff since they have convenient access to the company, also citizens are encouraged to live in this place as this industry will be an advanced area. A study in California found that virtually 65% local people are recruited in a new company since they are needed to help various busy activities there. It is very beneficial for them since it helps their financial. This opportunity means that relocating industries is very important for government and society as it provides occupation and reorganizes demography.

In conclusion, economic growth and controlled-growth of population are the noticeable impacts far outweigh the supposed disadvantages of increasing the fame of any companies.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Grandparents are the best nurturer for children's growth [2]

Some parents think that childcare centers provide the best services for children of pre-school age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better cares for their kids. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is generally argued that children age below 7 years should be entered in the childcare since it provides the most appropriate support, while others who have a busy working time believe that grandparents is the best option for caring their generation. Whereas childcare offers a lot of professional staffs to look for those children, I believe that own family is the great trusted nurturer.

Childcare center is the beneficial place for parents who want to protect the growth of their children since the fully-trained staffs are offered there. It is because the company has improved the capacity of their employees by giving more experiences based on their tasks in training center before permitting them to enter the real job. For example, my friend's mother has worked as a baby sitter since 5 years. Initially, she should follow a compulsory training with other employees for 3 months where they are taught how to serve suitably a child who has unpredictable mood.

However, some parents who do not have available time for their children since they have to finish their work tend to choose grandparents as the great choice to entrust their children growth. Grandparents are trusted people since they have a direct relation and a strong responsibility with their grandchild. Most children in my region are entrusted by their grandparents since their parents should spend most of their time in working field. Interestingly, those children present a great performance in their social skills such as interacting appropriately with others in their daily life. It is proven that direction from grandparents has noticeable positive effects in their grandchild growth. Therefore, I believe that the best nurturer for children is grandparents as they have learnt how to educate children since several decades.

To conclude, although sorts of advanced attendances are offered in childcare, each member of a family is the best supporter for children's growth as the closest relation is formed.

Writing Feedback / Although locating addicts in prison can alter their bad habit, this solution is not full enough. [2]

Should drug addicts be jailed or rehabilitated? Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Some argue that people who are addicted to drugs should be jailed since they have infringed the law, while others believe that it is a kind of medical problems and should be hospitalized. Even though punishing them into a prison is the practical solution, I believe that allowing and treating them in the infirmary are the best completion.

Jail limits the chance for users to access drugs. This is because all staffs have a high responsibility to observe and manage their activities, so they can adjust to a healthy lifestyle and stop using drugs as they are offered several diets and medicines to decrease their addiction. In reverse, a survey in Indonesia proved that when addicts are confined in a prison, they cannot alter their dependence on drugs since it need more direction and instruction, although they are limited to access it.

Rehabilitation is thought as the great way to help medical problems of addicts. By providing any specific and suitable treatments for them, the cause can be detected and the suitable cure can be presented to reach a noticeable change in their health. A study in many hospitals in England showed that by rehabilitating drug users, the number of addicts has decreased considerably as they gain clear instruction and new knowledge about how to get a healthy life in their cure.

All in all, although locating addicts in prison can alter their bad habit, it does not offer the essential problem and that is the main reason why medical treatment is the right decision to help them discontinue using narcotic.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Encouraging Children to Find Some Kind of Paid Work - controversial issue today. [2]

In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Persuading a job for children is being controversial today. Some argue that it is a false point of view because children's academic achievement can be disrupted, while others say that valuable knowledge is provided as they learn how to build attractive communication with many costumers. Although giving them an opportunity in working field disturbs their focus in school, I believe that it is more wisely to encourage and offer them an occupation.

It is assumed that entering working field for children aged below 18 is wrong since students have to focus on their skills in education. They should not work at the same time, due to the reason that people are not capable in multi-tasking, thus students cannot present their best capacity in academic performance if they have another duty. However, a recent study by Endsleigh found that children who worked part-time were immensely show great achievement in their school.

Priceless knowledge such as well time management and great socialist personality are the positive effects of having an experience as a worker in young age. Having an experience as a worker whilst still at school teaches children to be an independent person and having great time management skill. This effect can be shown in their independence and discipline when they finishing their assignments in the classroom since they learnt it in their working experience. For instance, a student who has a part-time job learnt how to make balance his time for studying and working, and then he applies it in his school when he has a lot of tasks. This results in handling all assignment very well.

In conclusion, even though allowing children to find a job is risky decision since their studying time can be reduced, it is better for their future as they have learnt communication ability which is not appropriately provided in school.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: A higher tax on fast food to tackle the health problems [2]

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. it is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Today's issue is a large consumption of fast food. Since majority of people are grieving from sickness as a consequence of overeating junk food, some people argue that enhancement of taxes on convenient diet should be applied by governments, but nevertheless it is not the most appropriate measurement. It is agreed that other methods such as persuasive communication and preventive education will be more effective.

Practical food plays an essential role in human's lifestyle, it is inevitable for everyone. However, it causes any medical problems, like obesity, high cholesterol, and hearth disease. One of tactical solution Is increasing the tax since it encourages people to buy other food which have a lower price. As a result, some consumers alter their life's menu and limit their consumption of junk food, although it does not show a noticeable change. Accustoming a new habit on diet requires more serious efforts, most people just fight in several week, then they back to their previous attitudes. Therefore, locating a more expensive product is not the long term way to cut the number of fast food consumption.

Due to the fact that teenagers are the predominant consumers of fast food, a British newspaper showed that the main cause is they have a great opportunity and high desire to purchase and try sorts of unhealthy dishes. The price is not the essential aspect determining their choices on food, but their knowledge about the dangerous of convenient food is the most essential aspect. Presenting an interactive parents-children discussion and providing the real comprehension by showing any attractive figures of their body which are attacked can realize students successfully.

All in all, it is clear that junk food affects human's health. Even though the government put a higher price on fast food, people still consume this diet. It would be better if people are taught about the drawbacks of fast food frequently and regularly in interesting ways.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: When children should start learning? [3]

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight.

How far do you agree with either of these views?

The appropriate period to start learning for children leads an international controversy. Some argue that children should enter the formal education when they are four years old, while others require a higher standards of students' age, between seven or eight. Having an early chance to stimulate brain is essential to improve students' capacity but there are several attitudes of 4-years old children which create ineffective outcome such as their mood and awareness. In contrast, children aged 7 have a better capability to receive various new knowledge. However, I agree that providing a place for children aged 4 to improve their skills is needed, although it is not a part of formal education.

At the present time, most developed countries allow their young generation to gain much knowledge as soon as possible. Playgroups are offered to exercise student's brain frequently in childhood period. Also, they are persuaded to have a high responsibility. However, 4-years old students tend to have unpredictable mood and lack of responsibility, so achieving a great result in learning process is difficult. Nevertheless, offering formal education for students aged 4 is not relevant to their characteristics.

On the other hand, some developing countries apply a different rule in their education system. Children aged below 7 cannot enter schools since the best period to study in formal school is 7. Although students have enough cognitive skills, they are lack of psychomotor skills since the subjects in elementary school focus on academic skills. Physical development is crucial, so offering a place to learn this subject is needed. Although it does not include in the formal education, I believe that it is very beneficial as an option for children who need more exercises in their childhood.

All in all, learning process is better to be given for 4-years old children to improve their psychomotor skills but the readiness of students is very important to consider since it has a large influence in learning result. Therefore, it would be better if it is just a choice, not an obligation.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: Online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand - very convenient transaction [2]

A breakdown of proportion of internet-based trade for different four commodities in New Zealand between 2003 and 2013, a 10-year period is presented in the pie charts. Overall, it is immediately apparent that the largest growth has occurred in the film or music sales, while clothes become the most unpopular products in online shopping.

In 2003, people who bought film or music on the internet shops showed a medium percentage, at 21% and increased significantly in 2013, by 12%. Similarly, the rate of books sales had an upward trend although in the first year costumers did not interested in this sector, at less than a fifth of the total as the smallest number but there was a slight rise to 22% in 2013.

Turning to other commodities, travel and clothes. Travelers found online transaction very convenient, at over a third of online sales came from travel services. However, the proportion decreased gradually by 7% in another year. Interestingly, the greatest drop appeared in the amount of clothes. By 2003, it presented the second largest well-known commodity in online commerce, at approximately a quarter of the total but in the following decade, it fell considerably at 16% as the lowest number in this year.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: Should people judge others by their clothes? [2]

Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Clothes not only protect humans' bodies, it is believed that garments conventionally reflect the performance and characteristic. For this reason, people are precisely judged others as what they wear. However, it is argued that judging people by their clothes is inaccurate opinion. Although dress has different meaning for people, I strongly believe that clothes are the primary need, while the aims of wearing clothes depend on the person.

These days and ages, most people consider fashion plays an important role in their personalities. In particular, people who work as farmers tend to wear a thin and simple shirt with bright colours as they work in farmland in which the sun light is very blazing. In contrast, official workers wear the formal neat suit since they work in an office where the weather is colder and a lot of attractive communication are built between employers and customers. The different clothes portray different personals, so it is acceptable for others to indicate what people are like by their clothes.

Yet there are some who do not believe that what people wear are the imitation of their attitudes since every person has a different style, they wear what they want. No one cannot generalize the characteristics of people as the clothes which are covered their body are same. Another view is clothes are the primary need, everyone has a large chance to apply any styles which are provided comfort in their life. Therefore, it is a false belief to judge people by their dress.

In my opinion, it is a tolerable to create a description of people based on their clothes because many occupations in our country require specific costumes, such as teachers and the government's employees should use their uniforms. As a result, public tend to describe these workers as a polite and responsible person since it is reflected in their jobs. Nevertheless, every person has a right to wear any dress, so the previous belief cannot accept generally, it depends on person's aims.

All in all, it is clear that people tend to judge others by their clothes since it can represent others' characteristics. However, it is not a universal habit some believe that clothes are their predominant needs, not the reflection of their attitudes. It would be better if every person has a deep understanding about others' characteristics before judging them by their clothes.

Writing Feedback / 'LaGuardia was the most popular' - TASK 1: The number of travelers using airports in New York city [2]

A breakdown of the number of people who travel by airplane in three different airports in New York city from 1995 to 2000, a 5-year period, and is measured in millions of passengers per year is presented in the bar chart. Overall, it was immediately apparent that LaGuardia was the most popular airport and had an upward trend. In any case, there was a fluctuation in the total of people who visit john. F Kennedy airport.

In 1995, LaGuardia airport was visited by 35 million people and there was a gradual increase in the next four years, by 15 million. Interestingly, by 2000, the total of passengers in this airport reached a peak of almost 70 million as the largest number over the period. Turning to the John F Kennedy airport, the number of visitors stood at 25 million in 1995 then rose considerably from 1996 to 1997, by 10 million per year. However, it was the less famous airport during two years which was followed by significant increase, at 45 million, at the end of period. The last airport experienced a gradual growth between 1995 and 1998, by approximately 35 million, and remained stable for the following three years, at over 40 million.

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Writing Feedback / Some people argue that the great device to communicate people should be internet [3]

It is generally believed that the Internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information.

Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Some people argue that the great device to communicate people should be the internet since it provides much information which is easy to access and up to date. However, others assume that it is not the most appropriate media to gain news because every person can upload any explanation which has not clear sources and very subjective. I strongly believe although the internet presents doubtful information, users find much easiness in their communication, especially between people who live apart by operating internet.

These days and ages, the internet is very accessible for every user. It is very easy to create a wrong issue and upload it as everyone has a large right to construct a private account in the internet. Blogs are the main example, now there are many blogs which present sorts of anonymous references since they just plagiarize information from certain sources and do not put the identity of original writers. Also, bloggers tend to combine their subjective opinions with information that they want to share, they contaminate the real information. Therefore, the internet will be an inaccurate place to gain information.

Although there are people who do not use the internet wisely, it helps citizens to build an effective and communicative communication. The internet has used in several decades and improved people's chance to access information. In the past, citizens took very long time in their long distance communication, but today there is the internet which allow people to keep up to date and keep in touch not only with local country, but also people who live in other countries. They just go on the internet and find any facilities such as Facebook. Fortunately, it is affordable for every person and takes only several minutes to make both verbal and textual communication. Hence, it is a great means for communicating people around the world.

All in all, it is clear that the internet can spread inappropriate news since every user has a large opportunity to provide negative and wrong information. However, it develops residents' communication since they just need a shorter time to share and/or gain any information. People can maximize the useful of the internet if they read and analyze carefully news that they read, watch, or listen, especially the sources to ensure that they find the accurate descriptions.

Writing Feedback / Electronic media, through their services, can create a great relation between people [2]

The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days and ages, advanced technology takes a significant part in human's life since it encourages people to alter their lifestyle. In particular, electronic devices as a part of modern equipment are harmful for their reciprocal lives since it leads users to be a selfish personality and lack of real socialization. Although some people argue that it brings drawbacks, I believe that there are many positive effects which have improved the standard of people' lifestyle such as creating a large chance to communicate with others and building the priceless relationship.

Electronic equipment such as computer and smartphone attract much attention of inhabitants, they operate it frequently to go on their social media. Since they find there are a lot of enjoyable activities, like chatting and sharing their great pictures. It causes the addiction of using these devices. As a result, they become an individual person since they just care with their selves. Even though they are in a gathering with their best friends, they just focus on their computer or smartphone and show less interaction with others. It will be a serious problem in their social growth if they still act this behave because they just gain the virtual friendship but they lack of the real socialization such as warm relation and interactive communication with their neighborhood.

Nevertheless, every development wants to improve many aspects in live, so I believe that electronic media has benefits in relationship between people. First, it allows people around the world to keep in touch with their relatives who live apart from them. It is very contrast with citizens in the past, they sent a letter and waited for long time to communicate with others. Another merit is now people have plenty of social media which connect them to many other users. They can find people who have same interests with them and set a time to meet each other. Therefore, these devices construct the strong relation between people.

To sum up, although the electronic equipment can alter human attitudes to their relationship such as being alone and an anti-social person, there are many convenient services that is presented in human's friendship. They can create the great relation with all people and build a precious friendship. Their relation would be more precious if they can control the use of these devices carefully.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: The advantages and disadvantages of taking a job between school and university [6]

Some suggest that young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the advantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this.

These days and ages, graduated students are expected to take a part in working world for several years before they continue their formal education in university. it is immensely clear that young generation will present their best performance in a higher level of education if they have the mature practical skills and own saving accounts. However, it brings negative effects on their life because most of them are positioned in the low-paid job and working period can reduce the quality of their academic skills.

Working for a while provides a large opportunity for young people to construct their life skills in the real situation since they interact with many people who have various characteristics. it teaches them building an attractive communication, controlling their time, and handling money which these abilities are very essential in their future. There could be the best time for adolescents to earn money by their own sweat. It leads them to be independent people since their salary can be allocated for their future education, like reaching the best university. Therefore, having a job gives many positive effects for young people.

However, it is difficult for people who had passed the school to be accepted in the well-paid occupation since most companies require high requirements. Applicants who have the highest degree have a large probability to be chosen in good position, while the graduated students are placed in a lower level. Another drawback is there is a limitation of productive time based on the capacity of their brains. In the working period, they are rare to exercise their brains, then it causes their previous knowledge are forgotten easily. It is a serious problem as in the university they will be taught complex subjects. Hence, they lack of the appropriate jobs and academic skills since they prefer working before entering the university.

To sum up, it is true that having a job before attending a higher level of formal education is important for graduated students since it provides additional income and some social skills which play crucial role in their future. Nevertheless, working can decrease their cognitive comprehension in the university. it would be better for young generation if they can make balance their careers and their education.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1: The air circulation system in the 2-floor house [3]

The figure illustrates the air circulation system which causes the heat loss and energy wasted in the 2-floor house. Overall, air enters the house through every slot in the basement and first floor, while the rested lamp and air which leaks out of the house in the attic release the energy as wasted energy.

According to the picture, some features such as a dryer vent near a washing machine and windows in the lowest floor allow the air to enter the house. Similarly, there are an electrical outlet, a big window and a door in the middle room, also a window and fan vent in the kitchen which provide a space for air to leak into the first floor. It produces the large amount of air in the house which causes the big amount of heat loss.

The opposite process occurs in the rooftop. The air flows out of the house through cracks such as a bathroom fan vent, a plumbing stack vent and an attic hatch. Also, the lamps in the kitchen and attic generate rested light. It affects the energy consumption since it releases the energy, like residual heat from the lamp's light.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 - the happiness rate of American based on their marriage status [3]

The bar charts illustrate the happiness rate of American based on their marriage status and generation which is resulted from a survey. Both are measured in percentage. Overall, it is noticeable that people who have married are happier than unmarried citizens. It can also be seen that there is no significant effect of having children in the family.

Turning first to the married people in the US in different four age groups, the youngest couples have the highest number, at approximately a half of total, whereas the happiness of people aged 50-64 saw the lowest rank, at 40%. The remain two age groups provide a small difference with the youngest group, by 1%. In contrast, the small rate, at about a fifth of total, is given by bliss level of unmarried residents aged 18 to 64 which covers three age groups. However, the oldest people tend to be happy although they are single since they are the happiest group in this category.

On the other hand, second graph reveals that a gap between all families narrows down. Parents who have children aged under 18 are the happiest family, at 44%, while the adult generation bring the level of their parents' happiness at 41% as the lowest level. Interestingly, married couples who do not have generation show the second largest percentage, at more than two fifths of total. It gives information that children do not affect their parents' happiness.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: The advantages of having own business outweigh the disadvantages [2]

Question:
Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organisation. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?

At the present time, some people believe that having own business is better than working as employees in offices. Due to the reason that laboring in any companies lack of autonomy since the majority of power is controlled by the chiefs. In contrast, running a private business provides an independence, improves a creative thinking, and creates the job opportunities. However, it also has plenty of difficulties such as the large capital and alterable profits.

It is clear that every single worker in companies or organisations has a fixed salary for several years according to his contract, so the guarantee in his future is presented. Contradictory, the entrepreneur faces many complexities. The first problem is people who want to start a venture require a lot of money to complete their preliminary properties for producing their first products, like a textile business needs sorts of sewing equipment. Another dilemma is their incomes are unpredictable since it depends on consumers' demands. When their products are becoming famous, they will produce the maximum profits, but when the market condition shows the revers, their trade will fail. Thus, starting and maintaining a business are not simple, it provides extra efforts.

Nevertheless, the merchants believe that even though there are some challenges, making a business offers them many advantages in their life. They have the largest freedom to executing many innovations regarding to their own opinions to advance their productivity and it led them to be the independent people. In addition, the buyers, especially in the culinary aspect, tend to find the attractive dishes which have unique color, shape, or taste. It allows the owner to put their creative thinking in these elements as an identity of their outputs, so it can guide much attention of people. Furthermore, it can help many people because it provides a chance for others who are looking for occupations. When the financial of a trade shows the significant increase, it allows the owner to recruit workers to help him enlarging his business.

All in all, it is clear that being an entrepreneur is riskier than working in the companies since it has many obstacles, like hard efforts and uncertain income. However, it brings positive effects in a larger field such as offering a job for others. Therefore, its benefits outweigh the drawbacks.

Writing Feedback / Generating electricity from wind turbine - IELTS [2]

The diagrams illustrate a piece of technology for generating electricity from wind and where it can be installed to achieve the productive power. According to the picture, a wind turbine consists of steel tower, blades, wind sensor, and generator. Basically, the blades are made from fiberglass or wood. A steel tower buttresses the blades since it requires high location for reaching much gusts of wind.

The process starts when the wind blows the blades. As a result, it rotates and produces lots of energy. At the same time, wind sensor detects the velocity and direction of the wind. This data will be analyzed by a computer to ensure that the turbine is operated properly. The amount of power which are produced will be collected in generator, about 1,5 megawatts.

The wind strength influences the amount of electricity, so there are predominant possible positions to set this turbine. The first place is in the bottom of sea which approximately a third of tower is in the water. It is a great choice to protect the environment since it will not cause damage in the landscape. Another location is near from house; the turbine is called domestic turbine. The last and the best position is in the high areas, such as on the hill or mountain as it provides the strongest toots, so the electricity which is resulted also has the largest quantity.

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Writing Feedback / It would be better for their health if every child had a high awareness for keeping fit. [2]

Question:
Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?

These days and ages, most children have an unwell lifestyle such as consuming many risky dishes and using too much their time to do superfluous activities. It is a blow for Parents since they are the first teacher in families who have a prerogative to control their generation's behavior. Another place which influences the children's conventionally is school as they spend a quarter of day there. I immensely agree that both parents and schools provide the largest effect on this problem, although fundamentally, every single child should have a high awareness to protect his life.

Family and school are the predominant places to educate children about the way of life as they have the highest power to form their children's routine. Family shows plenty of practical habits in their life that they are easier to imitate and practice. Unfortunately, they escape presenting bad activities. Taking watching TV as an example, they have learned from their parents to watch any useless programs on TV until the middle of night. Consequently, they do not have enough time to take a rest. Therefore, parents have to play their roles carefully and control their children growth perfectly.

On the other hand, most of children's life is spent in school, so there are a lot of activities they have learnt, both knowledge and attitude. In particular, school canteens offer sorts of dishes. They will consume fast food which contains ingredients if their teachers and other school members do not give the right direction. It will be a great responsibility for school to protect their students' healthiness.

However, there is another important cause such as their awareness. Even though parents and schools protect them totally, they cannot preserve their life or alter their bad style if they do not realize the importance of their health. To sum up, it is true that the essential parts are taken by parents and schools as they are closer to children than other. However, it would be better if every child has a high awareness for keeping fit.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: The essential communication skills in people's job from 1997 to 2006 [2]

A breakdown of the crucial abilities in the external and internal communication of people's professions according to the two surveys, between 1997 and 2006, and measured in percentage is presented in the table. Overall, it was noticeable that the important skill for communicating with others was dealing with them. In any case, listening to partnerships carefully was the most essential ability in the internal communication.

Turning to communicate within society, 65% people assumed that dealing with others was needed in 1997 and increased slightly by 5% in another year. Having information of several products or services and paying more attention for clients had the similar number, between 35% and 41%. People found that ability of selling a product or service was not necessary in their job, at just a third of dealing's proportion in 1995 and decreased considerably at 21% in 2006.

The communication within company saw the high percentage of listening to colleagues carefully, at 38% in the first year and rose by 9% in 2006. The second largest numbers, between 20% and 30%, were showed by training and identifying problem together. People believed that preparing the activities and persuading or influencing others were less important in communication, at under a fifth of total proportion in 1997 and 2006.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS 1: The percentage of teachers recruitment by year of graduation in Ontario [3]

The line graph provides information about selection of English and French teachers in Ontario according to the graduation year from 2001 to 2007, a six-year period and measured in percentage. Overall, it can be seen that a gap between two different teacher's groups had narrowed down in 2001, whereas it showed the large difference in the end of period.

Students who graduated in 2001 and taught English had the similar number with France teachers, at about 70%. Over the next three years, there was a significant drop in the total of English teachers, at approximately a half of the previous proportion. On the other hand,, the first-year French teachers witnessed a fluctuation, at over 50% and below 70% respectively. 2003 to 2005 saw a slight increase, by 3% for both French and English teachers.

In 2007, students who became French teachers reached a peak at 75%, even though the number decreased considerably at over two-thirds in 2006. On the other hand, just a few of the students who were chosen as English teachers in the end of time frame since there was a sharp fall over two years, at 28%.

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