Writing Feedback / The sales of travel, clothes, film/music and books in 2003 and 2013. [2]

The pie charts compares the percentage of online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand. The data covers the sales of travel, clothes, film/music and books in 2003 and 2013. Overall, it can be seen that while film/music and books sold more via online, the sales of travel and clothes was smaller in the end of the period.

The biggest increase in online shopping was experienced by movie and music items. Its figure stood at 21% in 2003 and 10 years later, the proportion was 12% biggerwhich made it dominated online sales in 2013. The number of books sold online also witnessed an increase.In 2003, books sales contributed 19% to online shopping which was the smallest number of that year. However, the figure rose to 22% in 2013 so that it no longer in lowest position.

The other two subjects saw drops in online sales proportion. Online purchasing of travel which once became a dominant sale in 2003 (36%) had lost its popularity in 2013, indicated by a dramatic fall of 6%. The proportion of clothes sold online also smallerin the end of the period. In 2003, 24% of online sales was experienced by clothes sales, but ten years later it sales was the smallest, which was only 16% of all sales.

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Writing Feedback / Cutting-edge surveillance technology is beneficial for public safety [2]

Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cell phone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

• Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
• Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Rapid development of surveillance technology makes it easier to monitor people's activity. Considerable number of monitoring devices are intentionally utilized without people awareness nowadays. It is true that this case has several disadvantages in people's lives, but I firmly believe that it brings more benefits, especially in public safety.

Silent surveillance is unpleasant for some people as it makes them lose their privacy. Because of ubiquitous CCTV and tracking devices, societies experience discomfort since they feel that their personal lives are deeply observed by others. Related to this, I have an experience of choosing private items in a supermarket. The presence of hidden cameras made me uncomfortable when choosing feminine hygiene products so that I ended up buying random items which I found unsatisfying. Apart from that, the convenience offered by monitoring devices will eventually make police officers lose their basic skills for solving crimes. It is because they rarely use their tracking and identifying skills to find crime offenders and rely this stages on modern surveillance technology.

On the other hand, I believe that public monitoring equipment is beneficial for public safety. First of all, it will effectively decrease crime rate as crime offenders concern about hidden cameras that automatically record their action. Thus, criminals will think twice when they want to do harmful action. In addition, camera and tracking equipment are extremely useful in crime measurement. Recorded CCTV videos act as evidence so that the offenders cannot avoid punishment by confuting their accusation. Tracking devices also very helpful to locate the criminals so that police will spend less time to find them. Not only that, it also useful to find missing people so that they can be found quickly and send back to their family.

To conclude, it is clear that cutting-edge surveillance technology has more benefits than its drawbacks. I totaly believe that it offers better public safety although sometimes it causes discomfort for some people. In my view, surveillance devices is better to be hidden in order to prevent destruction by bad people.

Writing Feedback / 2002-2011 timeframe VHS and DVD's. The number of sales and rentals of films in a store. [2]

The bar chart gives information about the number of films which were rented and purchased from a store between 2002 and 2011. Overall, it can be seen that while DVD sales increased in popularity, the number of rentals showed a downward trend. Interestingly, blue ray films sales emerged in the middle of this 9-year period after VHS sales totally diminished.

In the beginning of the period, most people preferred to rent movies rather that bought them. More than 180,000 films were rented in 2002, while the sales of VHS and DVD stood at 85,000 and 45,000 respectively. The figures of rented films and VHS sales experienced downward trends and no more VHSs were sold in 2006. In the end of the period, only 80,000 films was rented. In contrary, DVD sales kept rising and reached a peak at 215,000 in 2007. However, this figure witnessed a steady drop which made its number just slightly below 180,000 in the end of the period.

Turning to the new movie format, after the popularity of VHS movies was gone in 2006, a year later blue ray films was available in the store and sold for 3,000 items approximately. Coincided with the steady rise of blue ray sales, the sales of DVD sales gradually decreased. For the following 4 years, blue ray become more popular since the first time it was sold. More than 50,000 units blue ray films was sold in 2011.

Writing Feedback / Human consumerism leads to a huge debt [2]

Some people get into debt by buying things they do not need and cannot afford.
What are the reasons for this behaviour?
What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

Financial issue is highly correlated with consumerism. These days, many people tend to buy unnecessary, unaffordable things which leads to a huge debt. In my opinion, major causes which lead to this problem are advertisement and social status. A big effort is needed to tackle and prevent people get into debt by their own bad habit in shopping.

Human consumerism is strongly influenced by internal and external factors. First of all, most people have a strong desire to be considered that they are belong to high social status in their community. They believe that buying luxury goods will help them to be seen as wealthy people so that they will get more respect from their peers. However, some of them push themselves to purchase such things by borrowing a huge amount of money either from other people or banks. Secondly, abundant advertisement in this digitalized era always succeed to persuade people to buy unnecessary things. This case fuels people consumerism behavior so that they will be easier getting into debt.

Some solutions can be suggested to diminish this kind of bad behaviour. From personal scale, each person must have self-control to differ their needs and desire. People should restrict their purchase on things they do not need although they have a strong desire to own such items. They should buy goods which are really needed for their lives. Secondly, stakeholders also have to take action to alleviate this case. They must avoid taking benefits from human consumerism. TV agencies, for instance, should restrict the number of advertisements in their shows so that viewer do not excessively exposed to tempting offers of unnecessary items. Although advertisements are main source of money in television industry, they are dangerously influence people tendency to purchase unaffordable things. Overall, if both societies and stakeholders make a huge effort to fight consumerism, the problem of huge debt relating to shopping habit can be avoided.

In conclusion, it is clear that a huge debt for unnecessary shopping is caused by internal and external factors. People's desire to gain higher social status and abundant advertisement are the two major causes. To tackle this problem, both individuals and stakeholders have to control those factors which lead to consumerism.

Writing Feedback / Charging people for admission to the museums; original writing, 40 minutes [2]

Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Mostly, museum's visitors have to pay admission before they can enjoy the display. However, I strongly believe that although this policy has a certain benefit for the museums, it cannot offset the disadvantages both for visitors and the museums.

It is undeniable that every museum needs money to maintain the artifacts and pay the worker. For this reason, most of them mandate that the visitors must pay a certain amount of money when they want to enjoy the interior. This way undoubtedly increase the museum's revenue so that they can provide better service for the visitors such as cleaner toilets, wider open spaces and better view of the display. However, this advantage is minuscule compared to the drawbacks it brings.

Not every people have a huge interest in antiques. Because of that, many people will loss their interest to visit museums if they have to pay just to enter it. This case will decline museum's popularity because only few of people visit the museum. Not only that, the function of museum which originally intended for educational purpose will be missed. By charging admission, museum is seen as a business rather than educational tool. All in all, admission fee brings several negative effects.

A free museum obviously cannot earn money by itself. Therefore, it needs support from others to maintain its function as educational tool. For example, the government should fund more to make the museum an interesting place to be visited. Donation from visitors also very useful for the existence of this place. Overall, there are some ways besides admission fee for museum to earn money.

To sum up, it is evident that charging admission has more disadvantages rather than its benefits. It is imperative that societies and the government should pay more attention to museum's revenue so that it will stand still although no admission is charged from the visitors.

Writing Feedback / This species originally hatch in fresh water, then live in the sea when it grows. The life of salmon [2]

The diagrams illustrate the life cycle of salmon, one of large fish species. Overall, it can be seen that this species originally hatch in fresh water, then life in the sea when adult. The stage of its development can be predicted by its length.

The life cycle of salmon begins in the river. Salmon eggs are laid between reeds and small stones in upper river in which the water moving slowly. These eggs then hatch, and the fry swims to the lower area of fast flowing river and lives there for about 4 years. Once the fry becomes smolt, it swims to the open sea and lives there for 5 years approximately. In mating season, adult salmon swim back to the upper river where they originally come from, to lay their eggs. Then this cycle is continued.

The body size of salmon represents its developmental stage. A 3 - 8 cm sized salmon is called the fry. After growing for about 12 - 15 cm long, the fry is called smolt. Salmon can be considered as adult fish after it reaches at least 70 cm in length.

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  The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called the salmon
  

Writing Feedback / Beginning formal school in early childhood is not a wise decision [3]

In some countries, it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight.

In many nations, children is often suggested to attend formal school in early age. Meanwhile, some countries allow children to join formal class after they reach 7 years old of age. I firmly agree that starting formal study at a very young age is not a wise decision as it influence the student's personality.

In some countries, 4 years old children normally go to school. It is because the society believe that their kids will be benefited by thismanner. First of all, they argue that young brains can absorb virtually everything effectively so that students who begin school at earlier age will achieve higher level of understanding compared to their older counterparts. Not only that, by being formally educated it the early childhood, the opportunity of being employed in a prestigeous institutions will be raised. The cause is the younger students begin their formal education, the wider range of in-depth knowledge they learnt. However, this case had bad influence on the children's characters.

Childhood is a crucial stage in human development as in this state, young people receive the greatest amount of new experience and information in their life. It is because their ability to communicate with others is developing, and huge curiosity fuelled it. Thus, it is better for the youngsters to be educated formally, by teaching them moral values and ethics which are very useful for their lives instead of facing them with formal education. If children begin to learn formal subjects in their childhood, they will have less time to learn about human ethics. This will results in highly educated people without sense of community. It is a common knowledge that this kind of people is harmful for the societydue to their tendency to get benefits for themselves as much as possible by unacceptable ways. All in all, it is clear that children are better educated formally at older age because they will have much time to learn abou moral.

In conclusion,it is clear that although beginning formal scool in early childhod will results in impressive level of understanding, their moral education is less developed than those who starts school at older age. I believe that moral and good sense of community is more imporant than formal education subjects.

Writing Feedback / 'potatoes and fish are the main ingredients' - Fish pie manufacturing diagrams [2]

The diagrams illustrate the frozen fish pie production in a factory. Overall, it can be seen that a fish pie consist of 4 ingredients in a container. At a first glance, it is made through 2 major stages, which are preparation and packaging.

The main ingredients of fish pie are potato and fish. The fish is putted in a microwaveable container along with additional ingredients such as peas and sauce. The top side of this mixture is covered by a layer of sliced potatoes.

Turning to manufacturing process, the first stage of making fish pie is preparation of the main ingredients. Delivered potatoes have to be processed before a month of its arrival. The potatoes is washed in cleaning machines before those are peeled and separated from its skin. Once peeled, the potatoes are sliced then boiled. The boiled potatoes than chilled and stored before it is used.

Meanwhile, the fish must be prepared less than 12 hours after its delivery. Lemon juice and salt are added to the fish before it is steamed in oven. Its skin and bones are removed from the cooked fish. Once it is inspected, the fish is ready to be combined with other ingredients, which are prepared peas, sauce and potatoes. After those materials are assembled in a container, they run through packaging machinary. There, the pie is wrapped and freezed before it is stored or dispatched.

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Writing Feedback / The amount of coffee sales in five European countries was bigger in 2004 than in 1999 [2]

The tables below give information about sales of fairtrade*-labelled cofee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

The table compares the sales of fairtrade-labelled coffee and banana in five European countries, which are the United Kingdom, Switzerland, Denmark, Belgium and Sweden. The data covers the period between 1999 and 2004, and is measured in millions of euros. Overall, the amount of coffee sales in all five countries were bigger in the end of the period. Meanwhile, the number of bananas sold in Sweden and Denmark were fewer.

The biggest increase in coffee sales was witnessed by the UK, where only was sold for €1,5 millions in 1999 and rose sharply to €20 millions in 2004. This dramatic increase had made this country in the first position in the end of the period, contrasting with 5 years earlier when Denmark dominated it by €1,8 millions. Sweden sold the least coffee over this 5-year period. This nation sold €0,8 millions of coffee and this number only increased by €0,2 millions in 2004.

Turning to banana sales, Switzerland experienced the most dramatic rise between 1999 and 2004. Banana sold in this country, which was €15 millions in the beginning of the period was the biggest among other nations. Interestingly, this number jumped to €47 millions 5 years later. The UK and Belgium witnessed a rise as well, but those were a lot smaller than that of switzerland. In contrast, Sweden and Denmark sold fewer bananas in 2004 which made those countries stayed in the bottom two of banana sales.

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Writing Feedback / Freedom to choose university subjects [2]

Some people think that all university students should study whaever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology.

Discuss both these views and giveyour own opinion.

Students should have a freedom to choose their own education subject. However, some people argue that university students have to be forced to study certain considered useful subjects. I strongly object that atitude because in my view every subject is is worthy to be learne, especially when it matches with passion.

In this globalising era, some field of studies such as science and technology are standout due to the high demand of graduates from these subjects in many institutions. Therefore, society tend to force their children who will attend college to choose particular field of study even though those youngsters are not passionated of it. According to those people, studying high-demanded subjects will make students' future is brighter as they will easily find a well-paid occupation. Overall, restriction in the choice of study is one of some efforts to achieve a good quality of life in the future.

From my point of view, it is true that studying subjects which are desirable by many institutions in this era will rise the probability of being hired in prestigeous companies. However, students who do not have passion about those particular subjects will waste their time in university. The cause is they do not feel engaged to their study so that they lack incentive and their study process will not efficient.

The best decision in education subjects is following own desire. When students happily study a subject, they will absorb information fastly and effectively. This results in a huge improvement of their skills which is very useful for their future career. If students are passionated about one less-demanded subject, after graduation they can create job opportunities for people who have the same desire. Thus, in the future they can work together in pleasure. All in all, it is clear that following passion to determine study field is beneficial.

In conclusion, although choosing potential education fields for future high-salary job may be useful for same people, studying subject in passion is more advantageous. In my view, students shuld be allowed to choose any subjects they want as long as they take it seriously.

Writing Feedback / Fashion choice vs personality of people [2]

Some people say that the clothes peopl ewear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Since long ago, society always associates people's characters with their appearance. However, the opposites argue that judging others' personalities just by how they look is not wise. In this case, I firmly believe that people's choice on fashion does not truely reflect what they are like.

Fashion is beliaved as the main indicator to predict characteristic of someone. First of all, fashionable community is seen as a group of people who care too much about what others' think, as they tend to follow the latest trend althogh it is not suitable for them. Meanwhile, their counterparts, ones who are out-dated in fashion, considered as easygoing because they love to wear comfortable clothes in order to allow them to move freely and fit into virtually every kind of occassion. Overall, there is a list thet society have made to determine people's personality just by their taste of fashion. However, in my view this belief is not true because it is too superficial to indicate somebody's personality.

They way pople dress is easily faked purposely to impress others. The common belief that well-dressed people means good personality, nowadays, is missused by some immoral people. They try hard to be good-looking in order to gain much respect from society. However, most of their personalities is absolutely the opposite of what people see. An impressive clothes is used as a tool to manipulate people's view on them so that they can easily be deceived. Those fake people badly use a good impression brought by their clothes to get benefits by deception. All in all, many people use social common belief to form their fake characters so that fashion choice is no longer accurat to indicate people's personality.

To sum up, it is evident that taste of fashion is completely unacceptable to be used as an indicator of people's personality. In my opinion, the way people behave is more accurate to determine it, as faking attitude is far more harder than faking fashion choice.

Writing Feedback / Dress choice vs work quality in a business [2]

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance.

Some institutions forced their employees to be well-dressed. However, there are several arguments state that the way people dress is not as important as their quality of work. In my view, both aspects are significant in business field as they can affect company's income.

Since long ago, ones who dress smartly attract more attention and get more respect from society, compared to them who dress casually. This social beliefs is applied in business in order to make good impression to the customers. This case can be found in car exhibitions, for example, where sales propotion girls wear attrective dress to attract people so that they want to purchase the items. Another institution is bank, which makes formal dress a must for their workers to show and gain respect from their customers. Overall, well-dressed workers indirectly help companies to earn money because they can attract and gain respect from societies. However, I believe that work quality has the same importance as appearance.

The employees' quality of work is also a significant point in business. Formal dress limit worker's movement, so that some jobs which need a lot of physical activity such as manual labor, tend to allow their workers to wear casual dress in order to bring the best performance. Mechanics do not have to dress sharply for maintaning and repairing machines as formal dress will interrupt their maneuver so that the repairing act cannot be done properly. People always want best service so that good work performance will gains more customers. Thus, if the labourer cannot perform a good quality work, the company will lose their customer's faith. All in all, working performance also determine successfulness in a business.

To sum up, it is clear that both appearance and capability perform good quality work are extremely important to a business's success. In my opinion, company should make policy which adjust their worker's style of dresses to the types of work so that it will be more beneficial for the business.

Writing Feedback / Remakarble changes were shown on the data of workers relationships with their cooperators. [2]

The pie charts compare workers' relationships with their supervisors and co-workers. The data covers those subjects in 2005 and 2009. Overall, the relationships with co-workers got better in 2009. Meanwhile, relationships with supervisors only experienced several small changes.

Remakarble changes were shown by the data of relationships with co-workers. Between 2005 and 2009, a rise from 63% to 70% was experienced by the group of employees having very good social interaction with their supervisor. However, there was fewer workers who had good and fair relationship with each other in 2009. People who had no partners in 2005 (1%) was double in proportion when the survey was ended. It is important to note that the relations between co-workers got better as no one had bad connections with others in the end the period.

The quality of relationships between worker and the bosses were not shown big changes in proportion since the beginning of survey. In 2005, 61% of workers admitted that they had excelent relationships with their supervisor, then this number rose by 4% in 2009. The same increased proportion also was witnessed by another group, which is one who had no relations with any supervisors. However, good and fair relationships decreased in proportion by 2%. Interestingly in 2009, every worker answered the question about their relationships with the bosses, different from the attitude 4 years before when 2% of them kept silent.

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Writing Feedback / Businessmen should consider another aspect when they want to raise the company's income [2]

The purpose of businesses is to make money and they should concentrate only on this.
Do you agree or disagree?

Undeniably, most businesses are intended to earn money. Therefore, there is a view that business doers have to focus only on this matter. However, I absolutely disargee with that opinion because there is another aspect that have to be paid much atention as well.

Businessmen start a new company because they want to sell their idea to the public so that they can improve their standard of living by the money they earn from it. In business, plenty of money is needed to supply materials and pay salary of the workers. To maintain established company, a great deal of money also is needed to maintain and improve facilies and services so that bankruptcy can be prevented. Those are the reasons why most business only concentrate on big income, but unfortunately the way to reach this goal is usually unacceptable. I totally oppose the idea of neglecting other aspects just to earn money from a business.

One of ways to get much more money from business is reducing disposable income. In many company, a proper waste management takes a lot of money so that it reduce the income significantly. For this reason, some businessmen attempt to make this expenditure in minimal rate, by ignoring the fact that what they do can damage non-money-related aspects, which is environmental condition. The accumulated waste that is not treated properly will damages the environment severely, so that it will eventually brings drawbacks for people around them, including the business doer. Thus, ignoring the bad effects of reducing waste expenditures in order to keep some money is not a wise decision.

In conclusion, it is evident that although money is essential in a business, I totally disagree with one-dimensional focus on income. The people who involved in business also have to pay attention to the drawback that will eventually affect them if they inconsiderably reduce money for waste management.

Writing Feedback / Cutting-edge communication technology affect people's personal relationships [2]

The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Cutting-edge communication technology influences the way people interacting with each other. It is true that electronic devices bring a drawback in social relationships, but I totally disagree if this developed technology is seen as a sinister in people's personal lives.

Some people state that social connection among them is badly affected by the mass uses of electronic communication equipment, such as convenient mobile phones. Electronic media these days are easy to be used by people of all generations, from the children to the old. The most handy, sophisticated and favourite communication device, smart phone, makes people more likely to focus on their devices when they met with other people in real life. When in a meeting, for example, people who addicted to smartphones are easily distracted by the ring of it and ignore their surroundings. However, although it is evident that there is a bad effect of using electronic media for communication, I state that the use of this style of communication are absolutely beneficial.

Undoubtedly, electronic devices widen the range of people's connection with other people. As nowadays virtually every people owns an advanced communication devices, it is possible for the to keep in touch with anyone, anytime and anywhere they want. The difference of time zone and the length of distance does not matter. In addition, recently group chat becomes popular among people as it can connect people with someone who is barely known in the past. Thus, it can increase the number of relations they have.

In conclusion, it is true that there is a negative effect of electronically communication style, but it is not a great deal compared to the benefits. In my view, people should balance their virtual and real-life communication in order to avoid their prior relationships get worse.

Writing Feedback / Happiness Ratings of people in US, based on marital status [2]

The bar charts give information about the percentage of happiness ratings of people in US, based on marital and parental status. Overall, it can be seen that from all age groups, which are 18 - 29, 30 - 49, 50 - 64, 65 and over, married people are happier than their counterparts. However, the presence of children of different age also is slightly influential to the rate of happiness.

Married people are happier than unmarried ones. The biggest rate of happiness in married group is experiencedby them who aged 18 - 29 years old, which is 45% of all respondents. According to the data, older married couple are less happy than the younger, but when people reach the age of 65 years old, their rate of happiness is almost as high as young couple. Unmarried people tend to be unhappy, indicated by only around 20% of them state that they are happy. However, the oldest age group's rate is more than 10% higher than younger unmarried people.

Children also smoothly determine people's state of happines. Children who bring the most happiness in families (44%) are them who aged under 18 years old. Interestingly, parents whose children is older than 18 years old are less happy, even compared to them who have no children. The happiness ratings for those two groups are 41% and 43% respectively.

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