nida26
Aug 18, 2016
Writing Feedback / Most argue that the advance of electronic communication is harmful towards human interpersonal skill [3]
Halo, Miss Ilmi
Your Introduction:
The way how people interact each other ...
Basically, I have another opinion for constructing the introduction. I want to rewrite your introduction. Here is mine :
The advancement of sophisticated computerized media plays a critical role in the maintenance of people's relationship since it influences the way societies communicate each other. While, it is common belief that the electronic communication renders a negative effect towards inhabitants' life, I personally agree that citizens obtain numerous positive outcomes owing to these modern devices.
Thank you
Halo, Miss Ilmi
Your Introduction:
The way how people interact each other ...
Basically, I have another opinion for constructing the introduction. I want to rewrite your introduction. Here is mine :
The advancement of sophisticated computerized media plays a critical role in the maintenance of people's relationship since it influences the way societies communicate each other. While, it is common belief that the electronic communication renders a negative effect towards inhabitants' life, I personally agree that citizens obtain numerous positive outcomes owing to these modern devices.
Thank you