Writing Feedback / TED Summary Joshua Prager Wisdom from great writers on every year of life [3]

Based on the Armies of the Night, a book was created by Norman Mailer in 1968, he said that aged 44 is the age which someone was a rigid embodiment of bone, muscle, heart, mind, sentiment to be a man. Still on the same book, Thomas Mann also said that in that age, a man steps out of the darkness and wasteland of preparation into active life. Because of that reason, Joshua Prager, as a TED speaker, feels his birthday in April will become a tremendously good year. In this chance, he tries to tell us about wisdom from great writers on each year of human life. He argue that every writers want to share their precious experience based on their life. For illustrate, Thomas Mann in his book entitled Joseph and his Brothers, he said that it will happen to him as to them. It means that every people will face same moment along of their life. Book also tells us who we are and who will be to. Similar with James Salter book's entitled Burning the Days, he said life passes into pages if it passes into anything. In the other word, every people will pass every step in their life. The last, William Trevor book's entitled The Love Department said you are thirty-seven. It's an age of discretion. All of them is quotes from greater writers, to teach every people about life.

Writing Feedback / Article Summary about Christine Corbett Moran [3]

Christine Corbett Moran is a coder and theoretical astrophysicist which want to enroll herself to space-agency officials such NASA. At the moment, she stayed in South poles for 10 months and studying about echoes of the Big Bang. Because of she knows that NASA want to interview for a candidate. To anticipate the time for interview, she was scheduled to leave the coldest continent in south hemisphere and booked flights to get to Houston. Not only a coder and theoretical astrophysicist, but also she worked in propulsion at SpaceX, assistant of creation of the iOS version of the encrypted communication app signal. NASA try to make a journey to Mars. Fortunately, for Moran, condition in Antartica and Mars have the same conditions with constant darkness and limited mobility. Of course it is pretty easy to see how her experience could fitly with NASA's future vision of an astronaut. Furthermore, Moran also proven to herself hardy in that environment. In NASA training, not only she reads, but also she study to play instruments and speak languages. She makes herself as a busy person , busy enough to go to Mars.

Writing Feedback / Commuting in Houston using various modes of transportation [NEW]

The table shows essential information about commuting to office in Houston and measured by percent and the number of age while CO2 fumes is produce by various of vehicle is shown by bar chart and is measured by kilograms per person per kilometre. All in all, cars-driver only are produce the greatest CO2 pollutant and the most common kind of transport by commuters while cycle and walk are the least common transport to office and cause the least of pollutant rather than others kind of vehicle.

Commuters who use cars-driver only are the greatest percentage of transport reach a half. On the contrary, cyclist and pedestrians have the least of proportion only a little number. Furthermore, train and bus are the highest average age of worker at 47 while cyclist and pedestrians are lower than train and bus percentage by 8.

In the other hand, car without passenger is the greatest type of transport which produces vast amount of CO2 fumes reach more than 0.3 kilograms per person per kilometre. On the contrary, CO2 pollutant is produce by cyclist and pedestrians is the least of emissions amount reach zero pollutants. In addition, there are the large amount of fumes different levels between car without passenger and cyclist and pedestrians by almost 0.33.

(Sorry, i cannot show the table in this post because the picture on my book)

Writing Feedback / IELTS writing task II most inhabitants where everyone knew each stayed in suburban. [4]

In the past, most inhabitants stayed in suburban knew each other. Recently, most citizens live in urban areas only knew a little number of people in their environment. Otherwise, there are several benefits and negative impacts inhabitants living in little community.

Living in tremendously peaceful community, protect and help each other member of community for illustrate. Firstly, each member of community will appreciate to another member, without see the occupation, social status or economic condition. It will leads to condition of harmonize and peaceful environment. For example, the rich families still appreciate and humble to the poor families although there are huge different in economic condition. Because all of them have sense of belonging and tolerance in a community, they will appreciate each other. Secondly, each member will help and protect each other. Because every member will know each other, they will work together to keep the safety and security of their community. For illustrate, every man in a small village community in Indonesia always work in team with others member to patrol and watch their village in the night to ensure safety of the village condition.

However, there are several negative impacts living in well community such as they are close minded about the recent news in bigger community and every member has same activities in their daily life. People living in remote are for instance. In remote area, almost all of inhabitants in there have common job and daily activities such as hunting wild animals for their food and work as a farmer. They only get few of information in the village and they never know about the development of world industries. They only live in monotonous life make them close minded.

All in all, there are several advantages and drawbacks of living in small community. I suggest we can take the advantages and try to find best way to tackle the negative impacts.

Writing Feedback / IELTS summary TED Celeste Headlee 10 ways to have a better conversation [2]

Every conversation has a potential way to develop an argument and trivial issues. Based on research, more than ten thousands of the United States adults more polarize and more individual. The common problem is each conversation requires a balance between talking and listening, but some of us lose that balance. Moreover, one-third of American adults are more likely to send thousands of text each day, most of them more prefer to text their friends rather than face to face with their peers. Celeste Headlee, as a TED speaker, talks to wide range of people in her life such as kindergarten teacher, truck driver, billionaire and Noble prize winner. She also says that several advices to make greatest conversation such as eye contact, think about interesting topic and look a note are the crap suggestions. To solve about the problems, Celeste gives some suggestions based on her regular life. Firstly, do not multitasking when you are in a conversation, it means that be present in that moment. Secondly is do not pontificate and close any opportunity of respond.

Writing Feedback / IELTS summary task Papua New Guinea Hides Some of the Most Dangerous Volcanoes on Earth [4]

Dakatua, Pago, Billy Mitchell were volcanoes in Papua New Guinea which produced the biggest eruptions in the past and stood at VEI 5. Not only both of them, but also some volcanoes such as Rabaul, Tavui, Ulawun, Lolobau, Lamington, Karkar, Manam and Long Island which produce the second largest of eruptions and reached by VEI 4 in few millennia ago. For information, VEI is Volcanic Explosivity Index and the function of VEI is measuring the size of an eruption. It means that Papua New Guinea hides several of the most dangerous volcanoes on our planet. That's why inhabitants in there should be reminders about the most hazardous threats and the worse possibility if one of the volcanoes in there is eruption. Not only for the citizens in there, but also this warning for people in the world which is the chance of massive eruption that could be have a worldwide impact.

source: wired

Writing Feedback / IELTS Summary 2016 now looks dead set to become the hottest year on record [3]

The WMO officially informed that 2016 will become the hottest year ever recorded globally. Petteri Taalas, a WMO secretary-general, also say the same argument that every year has different record of global temperature. Moreover, WMO officially released the newest information in UN climate talks in Moroco which more focused on applying the appropriate preventions on global warming. Based on research, smog from fossil fuels constant in the last three years while increasing of carbon emissions was happened in the past. An interesting fact is when Donald Trump as the 45 president of the United States argues that an issues about the environmentalist was fought toward climate change, he also argue that the Chinese spread the hoax issues to make the American industries uncompetitive.

Writing Feedback / IELTS summary Aimee Mullins opportunity of adversity [4]

Every word has value and how we construct the value is depend on our way to delivered. Our language affects our thinking and how we view the world and other people. In fact, many ancient civilizations such as the Greeks and the Romans believed that to utter a curse verbally was so powerful, because to say the thing out loud brought it into existence. For several ancient civilizations such as the Greeks and the Romans are believe that a curse by verbal has a great power. She gives an example from his precious experience how powerful a word. When Aimee Mullins, a TED speaker, got broke in her feet, that's why he got a elastic bands in her feet to help built up her muscles. To motivate Aimee to more exercises, Dr P, a doctor who take care her, gives a simple ploy to her. He promise will gives amount of money to her if she did what she does not like did. Fortunately, the notion from the doctor affects to Aimee. It is represents that every word gives great power and impression for the audience depend on how you delivered your viewpoint and suggestions.

Writing Feedback / Nadia Lopez wants to open a new school, located in a place with high crimes rate in Brownsville [2]

IELTS Summary TED (v) Nadia Lopez Why open a school To close a prison

Nadia Lopez, an educator and social activist, said "I want to open a school and close a prison" which she cited from Victor Hugo quote. The implication from the quote is she wants open a new school which located in a place with high crimes rates in Brownville section, Brooklyn. According to NYPD records, Brownsville is a city with the greatest crime rate in the US, particularly in shooting case. Commonly, like other orphan schools, she also faces several crucial problems such as low parental involvement, lack of funding and finding educators. Moreover, bad environment and high crime rates also contribute as obstacles in her way. Not over in that case, her students also have several problems come from their internal problems such as more than a quarter are need special treatment, majority of them unable in English and Math and all of students living in poverty.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Summary Article (v) Energy-efficient engine turns waste hot water into electricity [4]

Recently, Exergin, a company which focus to produce electricity from waste hot water in a wide range of applications, plans to run the first industrial trials of its technology. Exergyn also estimates the heat lost in waste hot water from several sectors such as cargo ships and big factories as equal as energy in Saudi Arabia's oil and gas output. They try to use new material called nitinol which has several usage such as medical equipments, sunglasses and NASA's transportation. They also argue that although a device only improves a less efficiency, but this is free energy we can get. Furthermore, company had spent their time to perfecting the design and the material. They also predict will expand to the geothermal market.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TED Summary (v) David Burkus Why you should know how much your coworkers get paid [2]

Discussing salary is one of the taboo activities that almost all of people never discuss. How much our salary, the next person in our position salaries and office friends salaries are several questions we are never talk in advance and still become a secret. David Burkus, a TED speaker, thinks that if the secrecy of the salaries issues is removed, it will improve sense of fairness and collaboration each worker inside the company. Based on his research and experience, when a company do not make transparency of their employee salaries, so the worker cannot compare with their friends income and it will leads to make the worker feel underpay and discriminated. That's why in the US the law protects worker to discuss about their pay. Moreover, more than two-third from 70000 workers feel they are under pay, and 60% from them have a tendency to quit from the company. That's why transparency about salary is the major purpose to make worker more trust to their company and they can measure about their salary by their self.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Summary Self-Flying Choppers Fight Wildfires So Humans Don't Have To [2]

Wildfires accident which makes The US to spent more than 2 billion dollars to fight with them and kill 6 firefighters is the major reason why expert in the US try to develop a new way to solve the wildfire problems occur annually. The best way is researchers try to develop autonomous vehicles, so firefighters can out of the battle and let the vehicles to solve the problems. In the result, a contractor which developing the idea showed off 4 unmanned aircraft that join with Firefighter department. Indago, a quadcopter drone, uses several advance technology such as infrared and visible light cameras. So, the firefighters become the viewer to see about the situation use a small device such tablet and help victim to safe place. To prove the abilities of this autonomous, The Indago was fought fires in Australia.

Writing Feedback / IELTS writing Task I about the number of fish caught and the number of fishing boats. [6]

(NB: i am sorry i cannot insert the graph pictures because the image in my book)

A breakdown of the number of fish caught and the number of fishing crafts in Westhaven since 2008 until 2011 is shown by the bar charts. Taking everything into consideration, 2011 is the year with the greatest number of fish caught in both types of fish and fish crafts.

There was a gradual rise of the number of tuna that was caught since 2009 by 10. In 2008, swordfish caught stood at 75 while tuna caught was higher than tuna catching. Although the swordfish caught had an alternate trend between increase and decrease in each year, we can say that the swordfish caught had an increase trend. In the other hand, the swordfish caught stood at 75 and was reached 100 at 2011. The number of tuna catching in 2010 as equal as the sum of swordfish caught in 2011.

Furthermore, the total number of fish crafts stood at 50 in 2008. After a year, it was increased slightly in 2009 by 5 and continued reached a peak in 2011 by 15. In addition, there was a linier relation between the number of swordfish caught and the sum of fish crafts.

Writing Feedback / A breakdown of the amount of fund that a city government contributes to book associations [4]

IELTS writing Task 1 about how much money a city council gave to book clubs and the club members

(NB: i am sorry i cannot insert the graph pictures because the image in my book)

A breakdown of the amount of fund that a city government contributes to book associations during four years period is measured in pound sterling and the total members of book clubs are shown by line graphs. Taking everything into consideration, the number of book association members and the sum of fund given by a city council had increase trends in both of them.

The sum of fund was given by a city ruler in the first year stood at 20,000 and was reached a peak at 40,000 in the third years. Moreover, there was a decreased trend of the sum money of a city government was given to book clubs in the fourth year by 5000. In the other hand, the number of book club members reached 6,000 and continued by gradually decreased to 5000 in the second year.

There was an increased dramatically the number of club members in the third year at 10,000 and reached a peak at 12,000 in the fourth year. Furthermore, in the second year to third year, there was the same raise trend between the sum of fund was given by a city government and the number of book club members.

Writing Feedback / Information about learning something from television [2]

Question
Some people say that you can learn more about another country by watching television programmes and films about it than by actually visiting it.
Is there anything you can learn about another country by visiting it that you cannot learn by watching programmes and films about it?

Observe television programs and movies to learn about the others countries in overseas are better than directly visit. I tremendously disagree with the statement that people have better understanding about worldwide countries only by watching programs and films.

People can answer their curiosity is one of the benefits they can get from observe television programs or films about a country in the world. Not only they can study about common information about the nation, but also they can know more about the building structure, inhabitants and others essential information. For illustrate, from my own experience, I can found a new facts about the environment particularly American inhabitants, they are consist of large number of culture, religions and region states. Moreover, I also can broaden my knowledge about wildlife in Africa when I saw National Geographic program in television.

Although the viewer able to expand their knowledge from television and movies, they also only know small portion of factual information about the country. Furthermore, viewers only know the information is offered by media and not the real conditions such their upward aspects in economic. That's the background why visiting is the better way to know about any aspect of the country. When we visit directly to a country, we can face the real condition of the social atmosphere in there. In addition, we can learn about their lifestyle, habits and prosperity of local inhabitants which not expose by television program and movies. For example, when I was visited German few years ago, I felt cultural shock because the citizens in there are very discipline and obey any rules in their country rather than our people.

All in all, directly visit to other country are better way than observe television programs. Personally, for some condition, we can still expand our knowledge not only by watching television programs and directly visit the country, but also we can read several books and search on the internet.

Writing Feedback / Is working in a friendly environment and doing things which you like, the main factor to be happy? [6]

Certain people believe that to become the happiest person, you should have an occupation your love doing while the others argue that additional aspects are more crucial. Whereas, a person can be happy if they have a job which their love, I keen on to agree with the statement that there are several issues that encourage a person to become happy.

On the one hand, loving their own occupation can makes employees more enjoy and raise their work spirit and ethic of work. Moreover, when they enjoy with the tasks on their job, automatically the work atmosphere will makes them comfortable and finish every tasks with ease. As a result, it leads to increase of their outcome for their company and personal satisfaction. For illustrate, my personal experience when I was worked with my lecture. I love to do an engineering project and I worked as a ship designer because that is my passion. When I got several tasks to draw several parts of system, I can finish my job earlier than the deadline because that is my enthusiasm.

However, salary, career advancement and work hour are the others aspects which can make people happy in their job although they do not love what they do. Their priority is to get their purpose as a result from their effort such to improve their position in the company with a short time. For instance, a woman as a mother with 5 sons and daughters, prefer to choose teacher as their occupation rather than a career woman because teacher has flexible time and condition to teach their students and she still can nurture her children at the same time.

Taking everything into consideration, there are several factors can make a person happy with their occupation although they do not love what their do. Personally, all of those aspects are the essential factors we can consider about that, so we can get the best resolution for our job in the future.

Writing Feedback / Summary TED (v) Jill Heinert Underwater explorer [4]

Become an astronaut is Jill dream while an underwater explorer is her passion today's, especially a cave diver. Jill Heinert, a TED speaker, was tried to explore about the wonders of Mother Earth in the past. For her, cave diving is the most dangerous attempt in the world. Swimming in blackness, silent environment and without clues to exit makes her occupation more risky. But every ways she does to explore new environment under the ocean. Firstly, she told that our Earth in not a solid but more likes a sponge with many tiny holes. Diving inside the Antarctica makes her become the first person who ever explore the inside cave of iceberg. Secondly, her purpose are discovers ice ecology and investigate for life-forms beneath the ice. As an exploration result, she found a species that no one ever existed before with unique features such as no pigment, no eyes and tremendously live longer since dinosaur's age. Furthermore, she with biologist and physicists also take a sample for rocks in the caves, slice them and look at the layers in the rocks. In addition, her team found that they can estimate about the climate changes in our planet at very different times.

Writing Feedback / summary article Arctic ice melt is killing birds [3]

Nowadays, the environmentalists and scientist believe that global warming is one of the most dangerous issues around the world. Not only affects to the widespread countries, but also ecosystems across the Arctic and Antarctica. As a result, the population of obvious species such as fish and seabirds will decline because the warmer climate. In the other hand, animals in other continent are affected critical part of the ecosystem in the Canadian Arctic Archipelago, which has more than 36,000 islands. Reindeer or well-known as caribou travel over the ice land to find food and shelter and raise their young.