Writing Feedback / In 1981 butter was the most popular spread among others [2]

The graph below show the consumption of 3 spreads from 1981 to 2007 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph shows the information about the consumption of 3 spreads from 1981 to 2007. Overall, there are three spreads: margarine, low fat & reduced spreads and butter. It is noticeable that butter was the most popular of the three spreads in 1981.

Between 1981 until 1986, Butter consumption increased from around 140 to a peak 160 grams per year. During the same period, consumption of margarine decreased from around 90 to 80 grams per year while low fat & reduced spreads had not consumed yet until 1996.

By 2007, butter had significant descended since the first year. The highest consumption of spread is low fat and reduced spreads that had significant rose since the 1960's, to approximately 70 grams per year. The second place, occupied by butter with approximately consumption 50 grams per year. The lowest consumption of spread is margarine with average consumption 40 grams per year.

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Writing Feedback / THE NUMBER OF FOREIGN STUDENTS HAD INCREASED SIGNIFICANTLY AND IT HAD BEEN DOMINATED BY MALE. [4]

The bar chart below gives information about the number of students studying computer science at a UK university between 2010 and 2011

The bar chart presents the number of students studying computer science at the university in Britain from 2010 to 2012. Overall, it can be seen that there are two kinds of students: British home students and International students. British home students dominated quantity of computer science students in the UK for three years in both of females and males.

Between 2010 and 2012, British's home female students had the highest number in 2012 at 45 percent while the lowest number in 2010 around 30 percent. In the opposite, International students had dramatically lower than native students. Females who were studying abroad increased steadily from less than 15 percent (2010) to 20 percent (2012).

In 2011, British male home students had the lowest proportion. By 2012, the number of male students came from British country had increased from less than 25 percent in 2011 to the highest proportion at approximately 43 percent. On the other hand, International male students climbed from 20 percent in 2010 to nearly 40 percent in 2012.

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Writing Feedback / How to speak powerfully to make changes in the world. [2]

TED Summary- How to speak so that people want to listen

The human voice is the most powerful sounds in the world. How to speak powerfully to make changes in the world. There are number of habits that we can avoid. First gossiping, speaking about the others flaw. Second, judging, people who judge the others is hard to be heard. Third, negativity, someone who had negative thinking will be hard to be listened. Forth, Complaining, people who always complaining cannot look for good reasons in their life. Fifth, Excusing, they are blaming on everything, put the responsibility to another people and then take the rest. Sixth, lying, people do not want to hear to something untruth. Seventh, dogmatism, it is difficult to be heard. The thing we could do to be more powerful to speak is to greet or acclaim enthusiastically. First, Honesty, being true and clear. Authenticity, just be yourself and standing in your own way. Integrity, being what you said. Love, wish them well, you will be hard to judge other people.

Lower your voices which mean you can associate powerful. Timbre, The way your voice feels like smooth and warm, you can practice making your voice comfortable to be heard. Prosody, root one for a conversation, makes a conversation more colorful and sometimes makes some divergent meaning. Pace, affect the speed of understanding. Pitch, attract people concern to you. Volume, some people ascend or descend their voices to pay attention. Be a powerful speaker and get convince listener, means creating and receiving.

Writing Feedback / Summary-Immortalising Human Brains at The World's Largest Brain Bank [2]

Nowadays, In the medical field, they used to using brains for medical research. They need a fresh brain that has to arrive in 24 hours after died at least. Jorge Tejada and his team had found effectively frozen brain. The process takes about 17 hours since the moment of death until arriving at McLean Hospital and have to be removed intact and transported rapidly.

First, a brain is weighed, after that then sliced in half rinsed in sterile saline. There are two different way treatments. A half brain sliced from front to back and the cerebellum (key structure) removed. The slices placed into two plates and directly frozen using a cocktail of dry ice and liquid nitrogen. This way aims to minimize tissue damage. The frozen slices are then saved into deep freeze until needed. The other hemisphere is treated for examining and dissect needs. The hemisphere is soaked in formalin for few weeks.

Writing Feedback / Task 1- Energy Generation by Fuel Type [3]

The pie charts illustrate about energy generation by fuel type in Florida in two separated years. Overall, the charts show the trend fuel in 2007 and trend prediction in 2017. It is clear that Natural gas is the most popular fuel in 2007 and is predicted will ascend in 2017, whereas renewables at the lowermost.

In 2007, Florida Natural gas consumption is less than two-fifths, and the amount of Natural gas by average Florida predicted will rise to just over a half in 2017. During the same period, Nuclear utilizing is predicted will climb from 11,9 percent to 15,9 percent.

By 2017, several consumption of energy is predicted will be plummeting. Coral consumption is depicted to descend to approximately 23,7 percent. On the other hand, renewable has a very small number and will plunge to 1,5 percent in 2017. Other energy estimated to sharp drop from just over one in ten to less than one in twenty, while oil plunge to a small number.

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Writing Feedback / Summary- China wants its nuclear industry to grow dauntingly fast [2]

Nowadays, China's utility is quite high. Due to the fact that energy consumption will increase dramatically in 2030 as a prediction. The government planned to expand nuclear power massively. China started their first nuclear plant in 1994. China has 36 reactors in operation and 20 else under construction. Four have been approved and the others still in the planning stages. By 2030, China targeted to increase their nuclear power up to 9%. Nuclear generation capacity will have increased eightfold over the same period.

After Fukushima disaster in 2011, the Chinese authorities halted the nuclear project. They asked the government to check safety system of a nuclear plant. This year, Government had resolved to take care of its nuclear-energy programme. Government ambitious to reduce pollution in china by reducing greenhouse-gas emissions and ambition to expertise in nuclear, so they need to emerge their nuclear.

Chinese are happy that they will have friendly environment power, but they demand safety system. Early this year, the government acknowledge that its safety system still inadequate. In April, a national nuclear safety system was revealed. Debora Selingohn of the University of California said that she believes that government can keep and handle safety standard tightly.

Writing Feedback / TED summary: How does my brain work? [2]

When we park a car in the parking area then we walk into the mall and back, we have to remember where is the car. The hippocampus has memorizing responsibility. Brain made by a hundred billion neurons. Neurons communicate with each other by sending a signal. There is a brain research with rat, that shows the way brain remembers. Brain cells illustrated in the picture with colors. When a rat was put into the box and let move around to looking for food, cells show something like a fire sort but when the box expands the fire location are expanded. In a border puts into the box, fire sort will emerge at the location where the border. There are few cells consist boundary cells, place cells, grid cells, head-direction cells, visual imagery. All the cells are connected to make a pattern like a map. The brain will make a map of a place by exploring around. The brain will record every boundary, the more spacious a location the more fire sort are made. We could people to remember a way or place by walking around.

Writing Feedback / Most of the money in Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey went on food, drinks and tobacco [3]

The table provides the information on consumer spending on different items in several countries in 2002. Overall, there are five countries: Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey. It can be seen that most of the money in five countries spent on food, drinks and tobacco, otherwise, Leisure/ education are the least and clothing/ footwear at the second place.

In 2002, Turkey has a significant proportion of Food, drinks, tobacco consumer spending than the other countries at 32,14 percent. Ireland was at the second place at 28,91 percent, followed by Spain at less than a fifth. Besides, Sweden has the smallest number at 15,77 percent. The middle column describes consumer spending of clothing/ footwear, where Italy was at the first position at 9 percent, followed by Turkey, Spain, and Ireland in a lower position. The smallest number has owned by Sweden at just over than 5 percent.

Interestingly, the percentage shows that Leisure/ education spending has the smallest number compared the others. In this case, Turkey also at the first position at 4,35 percent consumption. Spain has the fewest number at 1,98 percent. Second, third and fourth position respectively occupied by Sweden, Italy, and Ireland.

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Writing Feedback / Differences in rates of various evening courses at an adult education center [3]

Task 1- The number of women and men attending various evening courses

The bar chart provides the differences in rates of various evening course at an adult education center are attended by women and men in the year 2009 and the pie chart indicates the percentage of age group. Overall, Women tended to enroll language course while men tended to choose painting class. At first glance, it can be seen that most of course participant are in the 50+ age group.

In this case, woman who attended language class represented 40 percent in total followed by painting class. In the opposite, men made up the largest number in the painting class at around a quarter followed by language class at a fifth. Women who enroll sculpture accounted for the smallest number at around below one in twenty while men have the same number of drama and sculpture course at 10 percent.

Turning the pie chart, most of the participant of evening course was filled by the 50+ age group at 42 percent. However, the gap between 40-49 age group and 30-39 age group widened significantly with 26 percent of 40-49 age group compared to 16 percent for 30-39 age group. Participant in the under 20 age group was doubled narrow compared by 20-29 age group at 5 percent.

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Writing Feedback / Why helmets don't prevent concussions and what might; TED [6]

Bicycling is one of children concussion causes. The helmet hasn't assessed the ability to protect the brain from concussion. Helmets has not assessed for protection ability. Many experts believe that concussion cannot be prevented. Shortly, concussion process occurs when brain smacked with skull and getting damaged and injured. This theory is not all right since probably concussion is more than impact but deeper. There is a space inside of the brain, only a few millimeters from skull which contain cerebral spinal fluid. The function of spinal fluid is to protect the brain so that the brain just shifted slightly. The brain illustrated as a rigid object, but in fact, the brain is a softest organ. When the brain moves back and forward, the brain was twisting, turning and contorting and the tissues are getting starched. A concussion is unlikely something at the surface but something deeper in the center.

A simulation which recorded by mouth-guard showed the red spot. The red spot described that brain tissues are 50% starched from the particular area while the blue spot is around exterior has only 10 % starched. Corpus callosum is the lobes at the center of the brain. The ex-football player had larger lobes than normal. His corpus callosum getting chronic traumatic encephalopathy which had a lot of death tissue. The point of decrease concussion is to slow down our head movement.

Writing Feedback / TED summary- A New Way to Heal Hearts without Surgery [2]

One of a hundred child in a worldwide has some kind of heart disease. The problem starts during pregnancy. The fetus needs to survive by communicating with the system and pulmonary blood inside their mother. After child getting birth, the communication has to stop and if it doesn't close it will make a hole in the child's heart. This phenomenon caused by prematurity and genetics condition. Major surgery is the only one solution to close the hole, yet Mr. Frenz Freudenthal and team have found a way to solve this problem by using a coil. This method was a success but it doesn't work on the baby who lives at 12,000 feet high. They have different heart conditions, their orifice between the arteries is larger. The baby cannot afford to be treated and die. The coil is only success in a half of Bolivia. Mr. Frenz and team tried to make a new device by using a traditional weaving complex pattern. The weaving let them created a seamless device. The device designed with a smart material that will not rust. It works by expands itself to be a complex structure. The device enters to the baby through the natural channel. The doctor only carries on the device close to the catheter through the hole, it will expand and close the hole. This method is no need a surgery and only takes 30 minutes. They committed to make sure that no one child is left behind, so they started to develop a foundation with one to one model. Everyone device mounted, everyone free device will be given.

Source: ted.com/talks/franz_freudenthal_a_new_way_to_heal_hearts_without_surgery#t-524414

Writing Feedback / Some think that foreign language better to be taught since elementary school rather than high school [2]

Question:
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school.
Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that foreign language better to be taught since elementary school rather than high school. People have the different view about this statement. In this case, there are several advantages of this view but also have disadvantages.

To begin, foreign language is a necessary for modern worldwide population due to the fact that technology was growing up rapidly and using International language. The newest knowledge comes from around the world, for instance, new journal or news written in English. Secondly, according to the sentence before, children will easily upgrading their knowledge everywhere and anywhere, by using technology. Third, Children at primary school are more easily to receive overseas language than the secondary school. Finally, by learning a foreign language earlier, it can make student accustomed with the foreign language.

Nevertheless, learning International language at the first grade will heighten student education burden. Every semester, for example, students have to pass many subject exams including foreign language. By adding overseas language subject into a curriculum, it will confiscate their playing time to study instead. For example, they have to study language at school and do some assignment at home, while it can be uses for playing with their friends.

In conclusion, I firmly agree that foreign language rather be taught since primary school than at secondary school. The advantage of this view more than the disadvantages. According to the benefits, it can be a consideration to add International language subject at elementary school curriculum.

Writing Feedback / Children can be introduced to a foreign language from their first years of study [3]

All children should study a foreign language in school starting in the earliest grades. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people from around the world think that a foreign language needs to be taught at the school since earliest grade. I firmly agree with this view that children can be introduced to foreign language from their first year, especially English as the international language.

According to the statement above that English needs to be taught to earliest school-age children. Due to the fact that children's brain can easily process several languages simultaneously with their intelligence development. Refer to Piaget's theory of cognitive development that Middle childhood is the best moment for the child to gain new skills including language skill. For instance, almost throughout the developed countries, students at kindergarten have been introduced to English by story-telling, sing a song during studying process. To result, this method had successfully devoted children's ability to speak bilingual. In addition, nowadays every technology is using English for every instruction. Giving a child a gadget is a notable to support child needs such as for education or even playing a game. By learning English at school, it drives child easily to using the gadget, so they have the ability to understand the instruction of the application on the gadget.

Nevertheless, an overseas language is a necessary for this decade, a teacher does not have to take a focus only on it, as children need social education rather than language education to build up their social environment and form the personality. At playgroup, for instance, the student not only learns about alphabet or number but also learn build friendship in their new environment, playing in a group which means tolerance is a must. This character formation will affect their future.

To concluded, I completely believe that an overseas language is a need that could be taught since the first-year school. Although English is an assertion for this develop the world, social education needs to be juxtaposed with language education.

Writing Feedback / Bird Migration - Animals normally move to a land to breeding [2]

Animals normally move to a land to breeding and move back to their habit to spend a whole of the year, this phenomenon called migration. Over the centuries, observers attracted to learn about bird migration. Nature shows how they respond the biological imperative for species to thrive and overspread into all possible ecological niche by migration that serves a decisive condition for a few species to breed and raising a baby.

Birds travel to higher traverse curing warm season to breeding and return back for non-breeding period. Migration offers the optimal condition to breeding and feeding. Most of the birds are migrated to Northern hemisphere. None of the species is known migrate to Southern hemisphere to breeding but seabirds.

Even though almost birds migration to the lower or higher latitudes of the Northern Hemisphere, there also many species are trans-equatorial, which means they breed in the Northern side and live in the Southern land. For example, the arctic tern that breeds in the arctic territory and winter in antarctic waters travels about 24,000 miles per year.

Some species take a short migration, such as breeding in the higher altitudinal, imminent or at the top of mountains and spend all the non-propagation season around by close neighbouring valley or the other nearby low country. This is the type of grouse species migration and also ptarmigan, an arctic grouse. The rock ptarmigan had never left the elevated arctic tundra while breeding season. They usually spend the breeding period at the top of the uncovering place arctic summit and the winter season in nearby valleys, bearing the coldest part on earth.

Most of the bird only can fly from six to eight hours per day across several hundred miles but sometimes they have to flights further if through long water flow or other condition such as deserts or mountain. Many species cross the Gulf of Mexico, for instance, they generally have to fly away continuously over 1,000 miles, to approximately 24 hours to 36 hours or longer. There is any non-stop bird use the bar-tailed godwit during migration, so they will cross over 11,000 miles from Alaska to New Zealand every year. Firstly, bodyweight needs to be upgraded to roughly 50 percent to fuel throughout the heavy trip.

The way birds manage the time properly to reach their destination has attracted observers to investigate it for over many decades. Investigators have been trying to learn about this behaviour. Many inventions found out that all migratory birds have the same ability to steer and an original drive to travel in a particular way. Nocturnal migrant is the one who flies at night, led by the star. When clouds coming up and cover up the stars, nocturnal migrant will confuse and may return back and digress. On the other side, there are several Diurnal migrants who fly following the sun. Diurnal migrants use the geographic feature for direction such as mountain ranges or seas coasts. Since night and day move regularly over the time, so the migratory birds have a sense of time.

Writing Feedback / Logging brings harm to the ecosystem. The damage causes habit loss, pollution and climate change. [4]

Asignment- Environmental Impacts of Logging

The logging industry supplied the raw material for many commercial products. It brings harm to the ecosystem. The damage causes habit loss, pollution and climate change that has been spreading from the rainforest of Central Africa, Southeast Asia, and also from South America to the northern woods of Canada and Scandinavia. The extensive of logging gives eliminate of a swath of trees. Terrestrial and aquatic life form are in danger, and soon will be gone by the effect of losing nutrients, water, a shelter for plants, animals and microorganism throughout the ecosystem.

Soil protected by underneath of trees, which means by losing tree nature will lose their integrity. The rainforest ground, home to a large number of plant life, insect, worms, reptiles, amphibians and small mammals, dependent on a compact canopy of branches and leaves to make them stay healthy and not impaired. The canopy catches the heavy rainfall to protect surface runoff, thus the rain will be separated into drips and fall down on to the porous earth. Tree roots make a stable soil and preserve from erosion. The healthy soil will boost root development and microbial activity that helps tree to growth well. Road building gives a heavy compression what damage the spongy soil, creating furrows where water collets and interrupting the underground water path. As result, the topsoil is leaving infertile stones and clays.

Logging also gives aquatic affect. Plants that separate all the rivers and a narrow river bank could help water pathway maintenance by cover the entry of soil and other residues, while tree shade slows down the growth of algae. The loss of forest could reduce the amount of oxygen in the water, killing fish, while the organic needs more oxygen after erosion.

Wood consume carbon dioxide and produce oxygen instead and pollutants will be filtered their leaves. Pollutants will stay in the air and will mix with water vapour and form acid raid if nature cannot handle it anymore. So the streams and rivers have a worsening water and rose sedimentation.

Truthfully, forest ecosystem supply humidity from the soil to the atmosphere, whereas inhibiting volatilization. Deforestation changes rainfall pattern that gives rise a flooding same as drought and forest fires. Deforestation brings up tonnes of carbon into the atmosphere leading to a major factor to global warming. Many logging companies make a way to an area, so they burn forest's tract and release more highly carbon dioxide concentration.

Rainforests are the decisive natural device that has biodiversity and irreplaceable wildlife habitats. Logging responsibility could help protect the world for the next generation.

Writing Feedback / Athlete Has a Great Peripheral Vision Ability in Sports [5]

When we focus on something we usually do not notice our peripheral area, we may know there is something blurry around but we actually do not pay attention to it. Some people need to focus on the blur that surrounds where they stand on such as Athletes. They optimise their peripheral vision ability to see all around clearly.

An athlete is trained to upgrade their visual ability to detecting and tracking what come around as much as he could. In a game, anything could show up suddenly but Athletes can catch their environment condition quickly although they move so fast without losing any concentration. The combination of good footwork, body position and peripheral vision will help improve viewing time and give the opportunity to foreknow what next.

Athlete viewpoint is full of motion which means need to be skimmed but clear. Any object could emerge from any porous quickly, that compel the athlete to balance their head movement an eye motion to move faster in response. A volleyball player needs to stay in a position that ready to face the speed and angel of the direction of the ball and the other player movement.

Contrasting court backgrounds, enlightening, the obvious divergence of uniform and less of-court motion could help the athlete to exacerbate their visual. It is strange to using a grey uniform while bright colours would help them to keep on eyes in each member.

Everything that brings out distraction while they are in focus will carry pause moment. Pause moment will convey a blurred view during visual tracking error. Even, every single of blinking may occur interferes. Human blinking is about two or a half seconds every minute and it will be more if people under anxiety attack. This occurs prompt blurs while eyes motion in and out of focus on particular objects. Athlete trained to be able to anticipate and outgrow all non-visual moment.