Unanswered [25] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by BAMS14 [Suspended]
Name: BAMS
Joined: Aug 25, 2016
Last Post: Sep 29, 2016
Threads: 18
Posts: 29  
Likes:
From: INDONESIA
School: ENGLISH STUDIO

Displayed posts: 47 / page 1 of 2
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / The new finding - birds can avoid crashing in flight [4]

WHY BIRD NEVER COLLIDE IN FLIGHT

The new finding, birds can avoid crahsing in flight, based on research they are have preference to veering right. In several observation with more sample birds who releas together in same time and same location, the result they are not collide each other. On the other hand they are flight different hight each others. Those behavior are duplicate to drone. The drone be equiped sensors to avoid hitting others object. In conclusion bird have unique behavior who can mantain each other in flight by coloni.
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / The spellbinding art of human anatomy - Summary TED [2]

Anatomy especially human anatomy is one of many subjects ...
This can describeS how our organs work to healthy ...
... vital organs, or even how they function.

Because human anatomy is a difficult and needsMORE TIME TO LEARN IT .

Those ARE paint and draw the medical ...
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / A Storm Wiped Out Power to An Entire State in Australia [3]

ABC News reported(REPORTING) that power had been resuming (...) are without electricS supply and horrible weather ...

According to THE ABC, the storm destructedDESTRUCTING public facilities such ...

Official said, force winds took out...

.
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / SUMMARS TEDx HOW TO LEARN AN LANGUAGE IN SIX MONTH [3]

HOW TO LEARN AN LANGUAGE IN SIX MONTH

Speaker at TED talked about learn the second language they said this is hard to several people. Many methods in the world to study foreign languages. That is about psychology, effort and industry. How to can normal learn second language quickly and efectively? It is big question everyone who want learn other language. According to the speaker everybody can belonging stranger language only six month, the progress about spending more time to focus. To illustrates heavy stuff doesnt fly, a plane cannot flight if more load but cars can fly with technology and they do not have big loads. This is Same logical to human, they are need strategy, organizing material and feel happy to study.

To make efectively learn speaker gave five principle those are:
1 .Focus on Languages, the problem of several people is not focus at one languages, they are always use first language every days. Focusing to one language during six month it will make easy learner.

2 Tools of learner, in this case is practice and adaptaion, learner should practice the new languages every time, every days, and every moment and adaptation whit it.

3. Understanding the mesage first. Understanding is crucial point to learner, understanding can do with body languages, observe or listening.

4. Language is not about knowledge but psicological training.It Is not about knowledge which must spend more time to reading science book, observation, writing an article but it is about training, so learner should more exercise speaking, listening and adaptation.

5. Make it happy,do not frustation and stress, make the process study to happy and fun.

Not only above but also there are seven rapid action to get new languages, those are:
1. Listen Alot
2. Get the meaning first, body language
3.Use patern already know, start mixing
4. Focus in the core
5.Glue words complex meaning,
6. Get language parent
7. Direct to conect to mental image
All in all, people can learn more language in six month with those strategy, to require more exercise, strive, and spend more time learn.
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / HAWAI'I VOLCANOES NATIONAL PARK [5]

( MY ADVICE YOU SHOULD USE CONJUNCTION TO CREATE GOOD FLOW, YOUR PARGRAPH NOT CONECT EACH OTHER)

GOOD LUCK KEEP WRITING!
BAMS14   
Sep 29, 2016
Writing Feedback / Summary : The September 30 Black Moon Explained [7]

Nowadays, people isARE extremely interesting in all eventS relating to the (...), total eclipses, etcAVOID TO USE IT .
... experienced another lunar name,IT CALLED black moon, that ...
This happens because OF (BECAUSE +NOUN USE OF) moon surface that is illuminated ...

GOOD LUCK
BAMS14   
Sep 28, 2016
Writing Feedback / The more we talk to others, the more links gets stronger - 7 Ways to Make Conversation With Anyone [5]

Conversations are links. Every time we ARE talkeSd with s omeone we never know beforeWITHSTRANGERa tiny link is formedIS MAKE LINK .

The more we talk to others, the more links gets strongerHONESTLY IM CONFUSED WITH THIS SENTENCES
In every conversation construct new links EVERY CONVERSATION CREATES NEW LINKS.

1. ATTENTION STRUCTURE (S+V+O)
2. USE CONJUNCTION TO CREATES FLOW PARAGRAPH
3. USE MORE VOCABULARIES

GOOD LUCK!
BAMS14   
Sep 28, 2016
Writing Feedback / Everybody who wants to be happy, and get the dream, is suggested to read book every single day. [5]

WHY I READ BOOK EVERY SINGLE DAY

Speaker in TEDx said, every body in the word want good life, but also there cannot get it one of them. Todays, globalizations are moving faster, it can be seen developing modern technology, business global, international diplomationand etc. People are not chalanges if they do not have good strategy, More persons are success in worldwide followed by good ways, like mentor who guidance their plan. Mentors are vital item to be success, they have power to changes life, more powerfull and give the best ways in the future, such as Mahatma gandhi, Bill gates, Kennedy they are mentors. For example many people came to Hollywood every year to got their dream as artist, businessman, politics and many kinds, every body want to got something in hollywood but every body not got they want in hollywood, because they are do not know the best ways. As the result gread deal of people are not perfect to get their dreams without mentors.

Design life what do you want, thinks it when you are in 60 years old, to answer it more persons in the worldwide said, they want to be succes in politics, carreer, life and etc. However lifes is short, but also we should get best achievment during life, thats why we are needs tutor. Based on speaker there is good and best mentor in the world, that is book. You can enhance your skills, changes good mindset, more knowledge and get do you want by books, that is short cut mentors. Most people in Europe divide to budgeting money for buy books, they are save their money espesially for buy it, this phenomenon is common in Europe civil. On the other hand most people in Europe are consious that book is treasure, good tutor and good teacher, everybody who want hapiness good life and get the dream, suggested to read book every single day.
BAMS14   
Sep 27, 2016
Writing Feedback / The best speaker must be able to present HAIL - honestly, authenticity, integrity, love [2]

TED How to speak so that people want listen.

Speaking is vital to iunfluence audiences. There are several points should avoid on speaking. These are, speaking ilness, judging, complaining, excuses, lying, and dogmatism. This is because many people have consider to speak and listen what other said.

Based on the speaker many way to be best speaker that were HAIL. It was stand for H " honestly", speaker should be honest about the topic. Than A " authenticity" content is real not make up mind, the next is I " integrity", speak with integrity do not make combat. The last is L " love", speaker should speech by feeling. Those are way to get good speaker and response from audience.

Not only above but also there are other ways, that is pitch. Some people do not care about it, basicly it is critical, because voice will ifluence feeling of audience. For example customer operator of customer services using good voice and pitch to service customer. That will make customer comfort and feel satisfy.

In conclusion, speaking powerfull will make audience be good listener and speaker can influences the audients.

Source: youtube.com/watch?v=eIho2S0ZahI
BAMS14   
Sep 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / From 1981 to 2007 butter was the most popular spread that was consumed by people [2]

Between 1981 and 1986, butter consumption rose from around 140 to a peak of 160 gramsTHAT IS NOT MATCH BETWEEN AROUND TO A PEAKper person per year. The other way,YOU COULD CHANGE WITH OTHER VOCAB SUCH AS ON THE OTHER HAND, ON THE OTHER SIDE, ETC . consumption of margarine declined from around 90 to 80 grams per person in the same period

... margarine consumption declined from around 100 to 80 grams person per year .
..., to nearly 60 grams per person , while the figures for lowfat and reduced spreads rose from around 10 to a peak of 80 grams per person .

AVOID REPEATATION, USE OTHER VOCABULARIES IT WAS SHOWN POOR VOCAB
GOOD JOB!!
BAMS14   
Sep 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / The rank of education of Bulgaria citizens who chose to live in another country [3]

hallo
there are few advice for you

Base on bar chart, the highest percentage of education rank to Bulgaria of societies is secondary but it experienced a slight decrease to nearly two-fifth percent every year. Besides, people who hold higher education show a slight rise of 9%.

The primary and lower education experienced( experience or experienced be carefull because that is different meaning) a gradual increase from 2002 to 2008(how many??) . At beginningavoid use first sentences with at begining you could use firstl or the fisrt or first of all) , the both of them saw( WHO??? NEED O) a increase 8% in 2002, then the proportion (...) experienced a rapid growth of 13%.

CREATE GOOD FLOW AND CHECK YOUR GRAMMAR FIRST,BEFORE UPLOADED
BAMS14   
Sep 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / GPS Accuracy in Australia versus moves of tectonic plates in America [5]

At the moment in Australia occurs shifted the continents. That is most phenomena in the world including America and others countries. To illustrates, Australia has shifted plate in a year about 2.7 inchis, not only them but also America get the shifting continents, report from new york times.

According to the director of the carthography national geographic, damien saunder, America has faster moving otentonic plate than others land approximately three to four inchis a year. This ensue influence to accuracy of coordinate GPS and cellphones don't have that level of accuracy also. In the other side they said when there is significant shifting land plate, we need to revise coordinate of GPS.

It is aim to get accuration coordinate with high technology. Although it will spending to more time, the technology will create maps including by farmers who spray fields with precision agriculture and self-driving vehicles.
BAMS14   
Sep 26, 2016
Writing Feedback / Overall, there are four kind of meat noted in the graph: Beef, Pork, Broilers, and Turkeys. [2]

The graph presents information about you need verb meat and poultry consumption in US( at introduction you should be carefull, use present tensese and pay attention with structure )

Overall there are four kind of meat: Beef, Pork, Broilers...this part should put on introduction

During the same period broilers consumption arose with 30 ... ( create good flow and use good vocabularies)

Between 1976 and 2012 the amount of beef consumed had ...( please check grammar before uploaded)
BAMS14   
Sep 23, 2016
Writing Feedback / TEDX Finding work you love dont Follow your passion [5]

Finding work you love dont Follow your passion

Most people in the world hard choosing career, because it is complexes problem. Rightnow many people Focuses on wrong thing, they can not find out the best way. Majority people have same strategy to got best career, such as following their parents and following money to get passion.

On the other side, several society have different way, likes find out passion match first before get success and fullfilling career after success. Based on the research academic during three years, That is reserved with reasearch data, particularly data can give us information that presentation people have passion does not match with their career. Generally People get different career with their passion. From the data we can see what we should do to get best career. We should doing valuable thing and avoid useless activity. focus on valuable thing anything that can give us advantages to improve skills. Doing important activity and focus to three part, firstly explore skills, secondly get good flexible skills, and the third solve pressing problems. Those are clear and concrete way to get work you love it. For example, the boy doing valuable thing such as reasearch, study hard, business, etc. without leave their passion to get best career.
BAMS14   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / News contributor elect what to show on television and what to print in newsletter [2]

News contributor elect what to show on television and what to print in newsletter. This essay will describe decided factor influence brodcast on television or newspapers.

Nowadays news are critical things, because audience have get information quickly. Based on the reasearch, audience can be divided to several types, those are active and pasive audience. Society active is who frequently get the news from tv and newspaper, while passive audience is peopel who only read the news. Data show precentage active society more hight than passive audience. All of those can be influence editor to decided the publication. For example been saw the data editor will be decided what they will do, if the data shown many active audience like good news, they will publice news on TV and newsletter.

On the other hand public will atract with bad news and fast to respon it. Reserved to good news, people trend not interested, and slow to respon it,because they are think it is not crucial information without hysteria event. Not only that news also can be washing public brains, it is happening right now. The other fascinating phenomena society pradigm shifted caused by news. The media give more news to give knowledgeand drive it to think something, but in other side also have negative efect, if news are not valid.So in my point of view bad news more atrract than good new. For example has been murder in someplace, it is can be viral news than news which shown the prestation of elementary student.

In conclusion, many factors influence contributor to devided publice the news on tv or newsletter and good or bad news can influence the audience interest.
BAMS14   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / Nadia Lopez: Why open a school? To close a prison [4]

HALLO
THERE ARE FEW ADVICE FOR YOU

When Nadia Lopez openedOPENING THE Mott Hall Bridges Academy school in 2010 , Mott Hall Bridges Academy in 2010

Open OpenING school to Close prison.

This school started with 45 pupils with , special needS and live behind the poverty. She neededNEEDS more classroomS which could be provided to them. However, RIGHT now, at 98 per cent graduation rate ...

They start to revolute the education with mature who conduct love, structure,...
... to become more usefulL in the future. However, it is WAS not easy dutyWORK . S
It can be very helpful. They ARE prepare the nest leader ...
BAMS14   
Sep 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / In China, Michelle Obama Tours School, Forbidden City [3]

1.According VOA news dailyACCORDING TO THE VOS DAILLY NEWS

2.Michelle Obama hadBEEN visited China that aim to speech exceedingly human rights and trade in theON international conference.

3.She said, the crucial aspect that is WAS basically had inhuman is human'S rights.

4.( ATTENTION TO USE TENSESE)
BAMS14   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / The background of the kind dolphin and the ferocious shark [3]

Hallo
there are few advice for you

1. This story isaboutdescribes two animals which ( use clause ) have different characteristic.
2. image in fronT
3.yet this dayTODAY was different with yesterday.
4. place was so long termFAR
BAMS14   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / TED Talk Summary; Nicholas Stern: The State of The Climate - and What We Might Do about it [3]

hallo rizal
there are few suggestion for you

Countries, nowadays, face remarkable enhances (...) economic achievement,nowadays , but they are vulnerableS to overcome the impact ...

Following that , (NOT ONLY ABOVE, BUT,) public must pay attention into ...

transform a fine(GOOD/KIND/BEST) relationship between(FOLLOWING S AND S) human being with the planet.

people must succeed lowREDUCE carbon economy in the next two decades LATTER .
BAMS14   
Sep 20, 2016
Writing Feedback / FACTORS INFLUENCE OF HAPPINESS - is it directly correlated to an economic success? [2]

Most people views that happiness is directly corelated to economic success, while another opinion that happiness depends on reserved it. This essay would like to describes both point of view.

It is clear success economic influence happines degre some people. According to the phsicology science, human feel happy if their can fulfill their need, which corelated with economic factor. Many case in the world people can not feel happy because limitation economic. Being social creature, human need actualize their life and relaxing for the moment. Automatically people requires good economic for fulfill their needs. For example, a small families need home to living, car to travel and other facilities as main need. If those are not fullfilled, they feel not excited.

However, several people disagree that not only above the factor of happiness but there is other reason. That is family, as several people family is main factor which make happiness. Behind the scene success person have happines Family who support, accompany and doing daily activity. Study shows that person more spend time with familly campared than other activity. The first environment which dealing on person is household thats why if one of their member home is gone they are sad, because family is key of happiness. For example, person who was born in around and growth household, feel happy and strong although have problem. They are feel comfort and safety, every day spend more time was child until old, if have option which one, family or economic will you choose, in my point of view many people choose member of household.

In conclusion, the factors of happiness not only economic success but family is one of several factor.
BAMS14   
Sep 20, 2016
Writing Feedback / Hunting and moving from one place to another for meal - the first phase of human civilization [2]

hallo
there are several advice for you
Hunting and movingtraveling from one place to other places to search for meal is considered as the first phase of human civilization development. (WHAT DO YOU MEAN?)

... of semi permanent village, since people (...) of relocating, when the soil (...) fertile; while irrigation was believed ... (ATTENTION FOR PUNCTUATION )

YOU SHOULD CHECK FIRST BEFORE UPLOADED
KEEP WRITING..
BAMS14   
Sep 18, 2016
Writing Feedback / Some informations we get from the map of island, before and after construction of travel facilities [2]

Writing task ONE maps of island before and after constructions

From the pictures we can see map of island before and after contsuction of traveler facilities. Generally the island before builded there were no building and amenities while after builded there are any facilities such as ships, restaurant, accoodations and pier. The map shows although the island was builded, environtment still perserved.

In the picture one we could seen the island before constructed there were facilities, only beach, sea, and field with trees, the environtment still natural. On the other side island after builded there are any facilities. Those are one food shop and one reception between accomodations, the right side of island we can see nine accomadions while on the left side there are six accomaditons. The map also prsent information about vehicle track which conecting between pier, reception and restaurant and also there are footpath which linking accomodation each other. Not only above, but there are some facilities around the island such as one beach, two ships and a pier.




BAMS14   
Sep 17, 2016
Writing Feedback / CONSUMERISM CULTURE IS BEHIND ADVERTISING [5]

hallo
there are few advice for you

Did you ever seeSEEN(ATTENTION FOR PAST TENSES ) a repetitive advertisement that ...
... beware of consumerism cultureamong us it cause the industry engage the [...] force their parents to buy them things. ( ATTENTION GRAMATICAL DONT MAKE READER CONFUSED)

The ads aims to persuade people for buying a ... PURPOSE OF PERSUADE PEOPLE FOR BUYING A PRODUCT IS MAKE THEM HAPPIER.

keep writing i believe yo will got good writing
BAMS14   
Sep 16, 2016
Writing Feedback / COMBINED CHARTS; global water usage by sectors; which country used more: Brazil or Congo? [2]

The line charts show Ratio global water use by sector domestic use, industry use and agriculture between 1900 and 2000 while the table give information about water consumption in brazil and congo in 2000. Overall line charts show most poeple were use agriculture sector and the least was domestic use, on the other hand the table illustrates ratio water user in brazil much more than congo.

According the information line chart, we can see utillization agriculture sector increase steadly at 3,000 cubic, it was seem highly part in the global water, and the domestic use rise gradually at two thousand, althought it was describe slights more than industrial use and agriculture. While the table present information the big population followed by water utillizer. Comparasion irigated land brazil twenty sixth times more bigghest than congo. Comparing both table and line charts, in 2000 there were fascinating phenomena, irigated land brazil and global water both of them increase, on the other hand water consumption in brazil much more than domestic use in global water.




BAMS14   
Sep 16, 2016
Writing Feedback / The Positive and Negative Consequences of Consumerism in Social Life [3]

HALLO
THERE ARE FEW ADVICE FOR YOU

Nowadays, the demands of goods increase higher and higher HIGHEST GRADUALLY , because those have lower charge than some years agoHAVE LOWER THAN YEARS AGO and the availability (...) is easy to find OUTAT modern or traditional market.

more informationS about positives and negatives of consumerism.

THERE ARE MORE MISTAKES YOU COULD FIND OUT BY OWN AND EVALUATION IT.
======> ATTENTION FOR USING COLOCATION (KEEP STRIVING)
BAMS14   
Sep 16, 2016
Writing Feedback / Learning a tonal language like Chinese is tricky, however there's a new tool.. [5]

HALLO
THERE ARE FEW ADVICE FOR YOU

... but it could be adapted to help with speech or ...
This system isHAS designed by part of the team, saysSAID Lou Anne Boyd atIN the University of California at Irvine. It isWAS called SayWAT, it gives real time ...

... which has feedback in different effect, because pitch isWAS more complicated ...

=====> ATTENTION USING PAST TENSE AND PUNCTUATION.
BAMS14   
Sep 15, 2016
Writing Feedback / Quickly scanning and noticing tracking objects - an athlete's recipe for success [2]

Being a good athlete just not depend on muscles, but need visual ability peripheral. Its vital for An athlete to detecting and predicting physical manuvers which is rival,Quickly scaning and notice tracking objects. Many factors requires good visual ability one of all is environment. For cases backround field and degree of lighting have big contributing to might focus an athlete. In other hand blink eyes influencing peripheral an athlete, everityng that catches they should quickly record and predicting next occure for example a volley ball player must pay attention to body positioning in relation to the speed and angel of the moving ball when the rival smashing or passhing. Overall the good athlete is good muscle, strategy and peripheral.
BAMS14   
Sep 15, 2016
Writing Feedback / Too much, too young should schooling start at age [7]

hallo nice passage
there are few corection for you

shoulD begin their education?
It can be disputed WHAT DO YOU MEAN? controversyor ather
The UK minister of EducationMinister of education the UK still advocate earlier formal teaching

might softed passage and check first before uploaded

fighting!
BAMS14   
Sep 15, 2016
Writing Feedback / Contrasting of energy production in France between 1995 and 2005 [2]

The pie charts shows compare kinds of energy in france between 1995 and 2005. Overall the highest energy had been coal and the lowest was other steam.

According charts highest type potency both years was coal, more than a third, while the minority was other sources at 4.90%. The highest in 1995 was coal, less than a third and the smallest was nuclear at 6.40%. while, the biggest in 2005 was coal at 30.93%, reversed was other energy 9.10%.

Comparing the two groups, gas and coal increased between 1995 and 2005 approximately 1%. Not only above, nuclear has rise around 3% and gas 1%, it was seem france have good potential source. While, Potential energy in france not only improved but it had decrease in petro circa 9%. Most item had increased but the extremely icrease is other power, roughly 4% and the smallest is petro plunged to on the order of 10%.




BAMS14   
Sep 15, 2016
Writing Feedback / It Cannot Be Denied, There are the Pros and Cons of Using Internet for People Appearing in This Life [3]

hallo asma there are few advice for you

The Internet is has completely fulfilled individuals ways to communicate, gain information, shop, do business and other activities, and a . N umber of people assume that it is the most necessary ...

... some individuals think that the Internet makes users addicted.

One of the advantages of using Internet is that we can be easier to gain ...
For instance, students who want to do their assignments ...
... using some social media like such as Facebook, Instagram, Path, and Twitter.
BAMS14   
Sep 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Many birds migrating very long distances to breed and feed their youngsters [3]

summarys task 2 migration bird

Many bird migration regularly which fascinating observer. Types of migration are different each other, many bird migration to breeding and feeding their young, they travel in breeding season and returning in non breeding period. Many types bird traveling, nocturnal species traveling at night seem to take their navigation cues from the star, while diurnal species traveling during at the day, take their cues from location of the sun.During migration many birds fly to find out nest to provide feeding their young and rise it, for example bar-tailed godwit birds flight non stop over 11,000 miles from alaska to new zealand.
BAMS14   
Sep 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Your health depends on where you live - from the TED summary [3]

hallo david
marvel summarys

there are few suggestion for your article

At the beginning of the talks, Bill Davenhall talked, a Health and Human Services Expert talked about ... (writes article directly to the point)
. And sharing about formula for ... (be carefull using conjunction and punctuation)
factor which people doesn't does not realize that has potential
such asfor the example methane gas
so he decided tomakemight a healthcare system called geomedicine
BAMS14   
Sep 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Student books: international visitors to New Zealand: reason for visit [2]

hallo mita
there are few advice for you

count of word atleast 150 your word are 148, create more word and improve your skills it was seem to limit ideas "poor word"

The pie charts shows activity where the international visitors come for visi to New Zealand.
The highest percentage of visitors activity is walking in New Zealand, and then followed by other groups, which there's no list of the reasons from (ATTENTION STRUCTURE S+V+O) the body should be adding more tensese

Overall it can be seen from the bar ... (attention to using punctuation, clause etc.)

create more comprehensive article
bravo!
BAMS14   
Sep 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / How many people of both gender registered in a fitness center between year 1970 and 2000 [3]

WRITING TASK 1 MEMBERSHIP FITNESS WOMEN AND MEN BETWEEN 1970 AND 2000

The bars chart shows quantity of fitness membership women and men between 1970 and 2000. All of all bars chart has shown the highest men membership was in 1995 peaked at 5000, and the highest women membership was in 1985 simillar in 1995 peaked at approximately 2800. In the opposite the lowest men custommer was 1000 in 2000 and women membership was 1000 in 1970 .

Based on bars there was facinating phenomena, men membership increasing three times during five years from 1970 to 1995 as much as the number of 3000, while there was similar between men membership in 2000 and women membership in 1970 grades 1000. In 2000, men membership droped dramatically 3000 in reach trought of 1000, it was similar to first year in 1970. During 1980 to 1990 bars has shown fluctuated men and women member. The unique data shown in 1990 almost simillar between men and women member, it was shown only little gap grow both men and women, meanwhile decrease from 1985. Among 1970 to 1980 men membership always bigger than women membership.




BAMS14   
Sep 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / There are five common activities for tourist in New Zealand [3]

hallo fadhil
there are few advice for you

The bar chart shows the percentage of aim of travelers
There are five common activities of tourist in there, which are ...(INTRODUCTION USE PHARAPRASING TITLE SHOD BE SIMPLE AND SEEM A FACT USE SIMPLE PRESENT TENSES)

Overall, people tend to outdoor[...] to spend holiday in there. (OVERALL ADDING TENSES ATLEAST TWO TENSES)

The percentage of people who prefer to do walking are approximately ninety percent, which becomes the most popular outdoor activities.

..., tourist who love toCHOOSE hiking volcanoes and boating, are recorded equally as much as fifty percent (ATTENTION TO USING PREPOSITION CONJUNCTION AND PRONOUN)
BAMS14   
Sep 13, 2016
Writing Feedback / Logging industry has many negative effects on the life in our planet. [2]

Logging industry is the suplies of raw materials an array products. However it is following with untold harm to the environment such as habitat loss, pollution and climate change. Logging industry also have Other negative effect likes nutrients, water, micoorganism, plants, terrestrial and aquatic are lost.Forrest can be defense effect of logging with leaves root and vegetation. Vegetation can blocking and maintan steady water flow. Leaves of trees produce natural oxygen can be defense pollutan it is can reducing emit carbon dioxcide with their oxygen.

Trees also creates healthy forest ecosystem, its draw soil and release to into the atmosphere while they provide shade to lessen evaporation. To sump up reforestation vital to keep climate change from untold harm of logging industries.

Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳