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Research advice on TOEFL, SAT, IELTS, GRE and other academic essays (page 446)

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Is Experience More book learning or significant in a person 's life ? Why ?

4 - I think I know what you are trying to say. It is not "fact." It is "question." ...

Writing Feedbackthaitam - Aug 22, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 25, 2010
'my actions have really touched' - day you made up a mistake which upset other people

3 - Both good and bad experiences which taught me a lot in life. However, I make it a must to...

Writing Feedbackkingofremix - Aug 23, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 24, 2010
TOEFL Topic: Lessons can be learned through playing games

5 - EF Kevin: I am so encouraged and will definitely keep practicing! :-) thank you for your advice. I really...

Writing Feedbackryutei133 - Aug 23, 2010 / ryutei133 - Aug 24, 2010
IELTS essay: Student behavior, causes and solutions.

5 - Children are our future, and it is crucial that we address this issue as early as possible. Government can...

Writing Feedbackadriennelin - Aug 16, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 24, 2010
Gap years between finishing high school and starting university.

8 - Yep, many factors are involved. If I grow up in one state and want to go to school in...

Writing Feedbackadriennelin - Aug 14, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 24, 2010
SAT essay:Should schools help students understand moral choices and social issues?

4 - Whatever I did may have been because of my own brain malfunction, so let's go back and check... ...

Writing FeedbackSnowWolf - Aug 19, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 24, 2010
TOPIC Schools should teach students about the overweight burden

NEW - Contemporarily, school students always complain about the overweight burden resulted in myriad of subjects. Yet school never fails to...

Writing Feedbacksonghongbo - Aug 24, 2010 / — -
'Books cannot meet people demand in time so radio is the appropriate supplement'

4 - With the development of technology, media for communicating information are growing faster and more modern than many years ago....

Writing Feedbacknxthanhxuan - Aug 21, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 23, 2010
The simplify of food preparation---toefl essay

3 - Take your time and write a few sentences in that first paragraph. Really explain what you mean to say,...

Writing FeedbackMrTom - Aug 21, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 23, 2010
TOEFL: I believe children should not learn a foreign language as they start school

NEW - Topic: do you agree or disagree: children should begin learing a foreign language as soon as they start school....

Writing Feedbackvirtuosoyell - Aug 22, 2010 / — -
Essay about Moving Image Technique in Advertising and Virtual Photography

4 - So what is that group called? It is called art (n)? That is strange with the parentheses... Be...

Writing Feedbackcvani - Aug 18, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 22, 2010
Agricultue as livelihood

3 - Dear Kelvin, Thanks for the valuable advises. Asoka Palamakumbura....

Writing Feedbackasokapalama - Aug 19, 2010 / asokapalama - Aug 22, 2010
The differences and similiraties of PIURA and AREQUIPA -Comparison/Contrast Essay

6 - What do you mean? You are concerned about the last sentence of each paragraph? The topic sentence is the...

Writing FeedbackMakubexD - Aug 17, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 21, 2010
Schools should ask students to evaluate their teachers. Do you agree or disagree?

8 - Students should get to judge their teachers. It could effect their the futures of their peers and people younger...

Writing Feedbackvaishali1980 - Aug 13, 2010 / kaylakay2012 - Aug 21, 2010
TOEFL- Saving money helps us meet the costs of our further studies; pivotal role

2 - "Them" is not correct with "money." Write like this: I believe that we should save our hard earned money...

Writing Feedbackshashank543 - Aug 18, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 20, 2010
IELTS: theoretical knowledge couples with useful skills are not only practical but also necessary

2 - some hold the view that a university is a temple of knowledge most students choose to go on...

Writing Feedbackadriennelin - Aug 19, 2010 / Yayz - Aug 19, 2010
GRE:ISSUE218 - "In order for any work of art-whether film, literature, sculpture,

4 - Thanks! Jonathan and Kevin, really appreciated your comments!...

Writing FeedbackEdward_L - Aug 15, 2010 / Edward_L - Aug 19, 2010
GRE- In any profession, those in power should step down after five years.

4 - ...change the leader every five years . I see that you end your first para with an example....

Writing Feedbackbroad - Aug 16, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 18, 2010
IELTS Task1: Describing data about travel to and from the UK

4 - hahah, no matter. This looks nice. It is clear from the graph that the number of visits...

Writing Feedbackadriennelin - Aug 16, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 18, 2010
TOEFL TOPIC:Parents and adult relatives should make decisions for older teenagers

3 - I read Ryan's correction version, but I am sorry, I did not find any correction or change in the...

Writing FeedbackMissS1987 - Aug 15, 2010 / MissS1987 - Aug 17, 2010
GRE-The arts reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society.

7 - thank you! Kevin, a good image given!...

Writing Feedbackbroad - Aug 8, 2010 / broad - Aug 16, 2010
Transportation is one of the source which convert area from rural to urban

5 - Transportation is one of the source factors which convert areas from rural to urban. It functions to...

Writing Feedbackjems007 - Aug 15, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
Parents are the best teachers?--Toefl essay

4 - Hey, it looks like I forgot to add the word "of." That's how the first and perhaps...

Writing FeedbackMrTom - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
How important are staff working condition? Employers role?

2 - In many companies, staff working condition is a matter of great con cern. --- This is a difficult sentence...

Writing Feedbackthaonhung - Aug 15, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
Playing sports teaches people more lessons about life.

2 - First and foremost, if people keep on training hard for a long period of ti me, they will have...

Writing Feedbacktingting - Aug 15, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
IELTS Essay : Role of mobile phones.

2 - Work on singular and plural: Mobile phones and its their... This is even better: Mobile phones and...

Writing Feedbacknishanthand - Aug 15, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
My relationship with my family (mother / father / step parents / siblings)

5 - You need a comma and an apostrophe: My parents were not married when I was born, and because of...

Writing FeedbackSocialorphan - Aug 14, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 16, 2010
Should we encourage children to be competitive or cooperative?

4 - That's a really good sentence! You should keep it! =) I think that is my problem...

Writing Feedbackadriennelin - Aug 15, 2010 / Yayz - Aug 15, 2010
GRE AW eassy_ how to raise children who can help bring about a better society.

2 - When it comes to solving the above problem, the first question we have to answer is "What is GOOD...

Writing Feedbackandy_Z - Aug 14, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 15, 2010
Choose one resource that is disappearing to save it - toefl test

4 - I like your first sentence a lot! Within Among the resources that are most critical is water....

Writing Feedbackrobchavar - Aug 13, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 15, 2010
Low salary and more vacation time or high salary and less vacation - TEOFL

3 - Add one more sentence to that first paragraph. Make it a sentence that tells the main idea about why...

Writing FeedbackMissS1987 - Aug 13, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 15, 2010
Some young people believe not staying with parents and some believe in staying.

2 - Hello Yats, I hope Maria's corrections are easy for you to understand. Do you have any questions? I also...

Writing Feedbackyats - Aug 12, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 15, 2010
Why do some students study abroad? Review my TOEFL.

2 - ...that these situation are more common.--- is this supposed to say 'common'?? Also, I think you should list...

Writing Feedbackclaros - Aug 12, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 15, 2010
To speak well is more important than to write well

3 - Hi. I think the example you use is appropriate, the language is fair good and the ideas are...

Writing Feedbackhonghee - Aug 5, 2010 / zengrz - Aug 15, 2010
IELTS essay:the disvantages of cars

6 - Hi, I am also an IELTS student (sometime my opinion may not be 100% correct). I believe that it...

Writing Feedbackstomnus - Aug 7, 2010 / nishanthand - Aug 15, 2010
It is impossible for a man to stay alone - groups are part of human's life

9 - oh ok I thought that sentence we have to add last paragraph means in conclusion but now I...

Writing Feedbackvaishali1980 - Aug 10, 2010 / vaishali1980 - Aug 14, 2010
IELTS Essay : Should Society Ban All Forms of Advertising?

8 - Good points, Preacherjew, so you think it is not good to ban advertising. I guess I think it is...

Writing Feedbacknishanthand - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 14, 2010
Environemtal problem, to inculcate a sense of genuine commitment

4 - I think it is better to be more conventional in this intro: Boosting the price of fuel is one...

Writing FeedbacklittleJenny - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 14, 2010
A two-paragraph essay about speaking in front of a crowd of people.

4 - I think it should be like this: They have are not used to speaking reasonably and choosing proper...

Writing FeedbackZubaida - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 14, 2010
CBEST essay (Hiking and camping): Memorable childhood experience

3 - After this sentence, I think you should add a thesis statement that intriguingly expresses the main theme of the...

Writing Feedbackfenrir - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 14, 2010
IELTS ESSAY : CONSUMER SOCIETIES

5 - Hi Dong, I'm taking IELTS at the end of August and I understand how frustrating it is to write...

Writing Feedbacklin54390 - Aug 9, 2010 / adriennelin - Aug 14, 2010
GRE AW eassy_ individuals VS groups of people in the significance of history study

5 - Overwatch_UA Hi Alexandr Thank you very much for your revised work!! I will make the sentences more...

Writing Feedbackandy_Z - Aug 11, 2010 / andy_Z - Aug 13, 2010
self assesment : attitude towards writing

3 - I think I agree, but what else do you have to say about this essay? Surely you have more...

Writing Feedbackmcolome - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 13, 2010
Summarise information about expenses on different items in five different countries in 2002

4 - Yep, so I was thinking that it would be good for you to give a sentence that tells...

Writing Feedbackgugacb - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 13, 2010
Baku-- a short paragraph about the hometown

9 - Ok, I will change to Oriental - it sounds better in the sentence. Exactly. I usually...

Writing FeedbackAzeri - Aug 8, 2010 / Azeri - Aug 12, 2010
My Dad; He always stands by my side - A Person That Has Influenced My Life

7 - Hi, Please I will like you to give more specific on the second paragraph, like an example of...

Writing Feedbackqbt512 - Aug 10, 2010 / mikkychy - Aug 12, 2010
People attend university because they want to prepare themselves for future career

3 - Thank your Kevin, I hope i will do it more better....

Writing Feedbacknhoc_tini - Aug 10, 2010 / nhoc_tini - Aug 11, 2010
A paragraph about something that makes me angry.

2 - Having picnics at beaches and lakes is not enjoyable because of sickening smells. "Unenjoyable" is not in my...

Writing FeedbackZubaida - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Susan - Aug 11, 2010
TOEFL Essay: Are there times when lying is acceptable?

2 - Since childhood, we have been told that we should be honest no matter what happens. A lie can...

Writing Feedbackcanto - Aug 11, 2010 / EF_Susan - Aug 11, 2010
GRE-Should governments solve the immediate or the anticipated problems?

4 - Is this supposed to say closer? -----> Local governments are more closed closer to the common people and...

Writing Feedbackbroad - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
my Toefl: which do you prefer?get up early and start day work or get up later...

4 - Others are inclined to get up ... When you use 'incline' it should be like this: "inclined to" example:...

Writing Feedbackoceanyang - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
GRE Issue: The intellectual benefits of attending a university or college are vast

3 - ...There are successful self-taught individuals such as Minhong Yu, who is the owner of trains of English training school...

Writing Feedbackinspiration - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
Cooperating of fathers in child rearing

3 - Yes, cooperation is better in the title. However... cooperating is not exactly wrong. It can be a kind of...

Writing Feedbackhaghshenas - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
Arts such as painting,music and dancing are the most colorful compositions.

2 - We all know that nearly all the outstanding humans have some hobbies involving art.---- good point!!! This is a...

Writing Feedbackmathsgao - Aug 10, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
Children may be stimulated by some new subjects and enjoy a more colorful and meaningful childhood

2 - Oceanyang you have an interesting username!! In Chinese medicine, the top of the head is considered yang, and it...

Writing Feedbackoceanyang - Aug 9, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
THE IMPACT OF ELECTRONIC MEDIA ON CONTEMPORARY GRAPHIC DESIGN - starting?

6 - 2,000 words is less than 7 pages. It's like writing 3 short essays of a page or two each....

Writing Feedbacksimondo89 - Jul 28, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 11, 2010
The Cask of Amontillado - Research Essay -Cask of Amontillado- in MLA

6 - 1. Read Yahz's suggestion (you didn't bother to follow this site's suggestion, did you?). 2. You may ask...

Writing Feedbackrhaineydaze - Aug 3, 2010 / EF_Team - Aug 10, 2010
IELTS essay feedback, regarding the idea of talking about power of advertising.

5 - Thanks everybody for the help. I will follow the advices and write more. Regards, Jose....

Writing Feedbackjcmorais - Aug 8, 2010 / jcmorais - Aug 10, 2010
How to take a good photograph? Chronological order - process Essay

4 - Thanks a lot for all the answers!! I'm not a native English speaker so I have some problems...

Writing FeedbackMakubexD - Aug 9, 2010 / MakubexD - Aug 10, 2010
Topic:My father.It's a preparation of speaking section for toefl.

4 - Okay, you got some very good corrections here. You can look at them all and practice typing the essay...

Writing Feedbackhonghee - Aug 9, 2010 / EF_Kevin - Aug 10, 2010

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