Writing Feedback / The way of people dressing is not the most important aspect [5]

Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people assume that someone who dresses well is a good person and another one who wears unpleasant clothes is a bad one. Meanwhile, others think that judging somebody by their appearance is not fair. In my opinion, having good looking may create a respectable assumption but it is not the most important thing that shows the real personality of an individual.

In a common way, people choose what they wear based on their fashion style and their certain purposes. For instance, teenagers usually have unique dressing style and more likely to wear many kinds of clothes with bright colour. In other side, most adults are more willing to wear casual and elegant ones. Another example, someone who works in formal sector like a teacher, an economist or a lawyer is prone to wear smart dress while others who have job as celebrities are dressing in luxury fashions. Therefore, in these ways clothes may indicate personal backgrounds but do not reveal their personality.

On the other hand, personal behaviour and attitude should be more essential to know what kind of person someone exactly is. A good man should have good behaviour such as polite, responsible, humble, easy going, open minded, and so on. The preserve, a bad guy are supposed to be a person who speaks rudely, arrogant, petulant, and having others bad attitudes. Sometimes, even though someone dresses smartly, it is not a guaranty that they have good attitudes. Also when a person wears unpleasant clothes, it does not mean he is a bad individual.

In conclusion, the way of people dressing is not the most important aspect to point out their true characteristic. Other essential things to know the personality of someone are their daily behaviour and attitudes.

Writing Feedback / How good worker relationships based on survey conducted in 2005 and 2009 [2]

The charts below show the results of surveys in 2005 and 2009 asking workers about their relationships with their supervisor and their co-workers.

The pie charts give information about how good worker relationships based on survey conducted in 2005 and 2009. The first two charts show the relationships between workers and their supervisor and other charts display relationships between employees and their partners. Overall, it can be seen that most of the staffs had great relations with both supervisor and co-workers.

The percentage of worker relationships with their supervisor experienced a slight increase from 2005 to 2009. Major workers established very good connections with their chief accounted for 61 per cent and 65 per cent in those years. However, there was a small number of employees who had poor relations in this category made for 2 per cent. Another percentage was provides for those who had no answer for this survey and ones who did not have any superior.

A similar result was given by the relationship with co-workers. There were 63 per cent and 70 per cent working people had very good relation with their partners in 2005 and 2009. In fact, only 1 per cent of them built poor connection with their workmates. Another result of this category was only 1 per cent of those who did not have co-workers in 2005 and 2 per cent of them accounted in 2009.

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Writing Feedback / The process of heat released and energy used in a house related to air circulation system installed [2]

The diagram below shows how heat is lost and energy wasted in a house because of air getting into and out of the house.

The diagram illustrates the process of heat released and energy used in a house related to air circulation system installed. Overall, it can be seen that, the ceiling is designed to release amount of the air from the house while the semi basement is aimed to let the air getting into the house.

The first floor is designed with three ventilators consisted of bathroom fan vent, attic hatch, and kitchen fan vent. Another air circulation device is the window and the door. Those ventilators are aimed to release amount of air from inside. This floor has two recessed lights in the bathroom and kitchen. Besides that, to fulfil its energy needed, this house is supplied by electrical outlet.

The ventilators made in the semi basement are involved dryer vent, and small windows. In contrast to those air circulations in the first floor, ventilators in this basement are prone to let air getting into the rooms. Furthermore, this house has an outdoor faucet which has water source on the crawl positioned under the kitchen.

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Writing Feedback / The increasing cost of living standards has pushed humans to work more. The purpose of a business. [2]

The purpose of business is to make money and they should concentrate only on it. Do you agree or disagree?

The primary aim of working in a business is to earn amount of money. However, people also have to concern in other importance. I believe that general people should care about their society beside of raise a lot of money to address their personal necessities.

The increasing cost of living standards has pushed humans to work more. In the modern era, most of people who live in urban areas spend more than a half of their 24 hours to make money. They are employed in full time jobs or manufacture their own-labelled products. Consequently, they get a plenty of money and they can fulfill all of their necessities even the luxury ones. The reserve, modern individuals almost never have socialized with their social community. They become individualists who have lower empathy for the poor and ignore their societies.

Apart from satisfying personal desire, humans should concern to preserve their social interaction. Another aspect that should get more attention from well-paid workers is helping others who have weaknesses. Instead of buying a number of expensive items, people are supposed to collect their money in order to give funds to others. In addition, individuals have other roles in a society such as establishing a good relationship with neighbours, friends and families. Doing those may give people another enjoyment that cannot obtain by having a lot of money like feeling comfortable and peaceful.

In conclusion, working people should have intentions to not only earn a lot of money for themselves but also to collect social aid for others and having a good social networking. Hence those can completely obtain personal and social satisfaction.

Writing Feedback / Advanced technology has changed human life in several ways particularly in how we communicate. [2]

The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Advanced technology has changed in several way of human life particularly in communication. Some people think that this advancement has affected bad effect on human relationships. However, I moderately disagree with this argument because apart from the negative impact digital media has helped individuals to extend their connections.

Electronic gadget causes negative influence for one thing it has made people became apathetic about their social interaction. A large amount of time belonged to persons for socializing with others has been replaced by diverse activities on the internet. This is more likely to degrade humans' skills to communicate such non-verbal communication skill and managing stress in the moment. Therefore, they become careless and individualists. However, the technology communication also has benefits for establishing larger relations.

Electronic media was one of the biggest inventions over the centuries because it has enabled human to connect to others in a long distance and broadens access to the international information. These days, people are prone to live separately from their nuclear family. Electronic gadget, therefore, has helped persons to keep in touch with their relatives abroad. Furthermore, the media has facilitated humans to build a new community easily such as searching for their interested pet club, making friends with foreign inhabitants, and so on. In fact, the media has improved more personal relationships instead of affected bad influence for those relations.

In conclusion, electronic media has not affected totally destructive human social connection indeed. It has several advanced function which help people to maintain their relationships. Hence, I personally suggest that societies should be aware with the negative effects on digital socializing so that they can maximally obtain the benefits from those sophisticated technology communications.

Writing Feedback / The ''dealing with people'' communication skill was chosen as the most essential in work. [2]

The table below gives the results of two surveys, in 1997 and 2006, in which people were asked which communication skills were essential in their jobs.
The table shows the information about some communication skills which are important for employees doing their jobs based on survey in two different years. Overall, it can be seen that most of external communication skills outnumbered the internal ones. However, the averaged percentage results for both kinds of the communication skills increased from 1997 to 2006.

External communication skills consisted of four different skills related to customers services. The largest number of people selected '' dealing with people'' as the most necessary skill. Therefore, it was accounted for 60 per cent in 1997 and 60 per cent in 2006.

On the other hand, there were six basic skills related to communication skills in internal companies. The most important skill in this category was ability for listening carefully to colleagues which accounted for 38 per cent in 1997 and increased to 47 per cent in 2006. However, this category skill included the least essential verbal skill that was the competence for making speeches and presentation. It only involved 7 per cent respondents in the first year surveyed and 11 per cent respondents in the second one.

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Writing Feedback / Three main causes which effects on land degradation / areas suffering the land destruction in 1990 [NEW]

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.

The chart reveals the percentage of three main causes having effects on land degradation while the table presents three areas suffering the land destruction over in 1990s. Overall, those causes averaged nearly same portion on decreasing function of farmland. On the other hand, Europe had the largest impacts among other regions.

There were three major sources of land degradation. Firstly, the most destroying factor was over-gazing that made for 35 per cent effects on the degradation. The following factor was deforestation that contributed 30 per cent destruction. However, over-cultivating causes 28 per cent effects on reducing the productivity of agricultural land.

Most degradation effects came from Europe which contributed 23 per cent from total land degraded including 9.8 per cent deforestation, 7.7 per cent over-cultivation, and 5.5 per cent over-gazing. On the other side, North America had the least effects on the degraded land consisted of only 5 per cent from total land degraded which averaged just under 1.5 per cent for each cause.

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Writing Feedback / Foreign visitors face a cultural acculturation [2]

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural difference. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Foreign people from across the world who come to other country have their own cultures but they should be accustomed to native cultures. The reserve, local dwellers are supposed to deal with a wide range of cultures brought by visitors. In my point of view, when persons visit foreign region they should face a cultural acculturation. Hence, both foreign travellers and local society should appreciate to each custom.

Visitors should have high tolerance toward local community. The reason is because every country has unique culture and tradition. As an illustration, Western countries have different habit from common eastern regions such moral such as moral value and lifestyle. Therefore, western people should be aware about the diversity in order to establish a good communication and socialization when they are in eastern countries. A further purpose from this toleration is to build the peace worldwide.

On the other hand, host country has a responsibility to make the visitors feel comfortable with the local cultures because they come from other community which has distinctive way of life. Local people should understand if some visitors may not like local food or they do dressing like local residents expected. Welcoming foreign people well might give host society some advantages for host community like increasing financial rate and developing foreign language skills.

In conclusion, experiencing different cultures may not be difficult for both foreign visitors and local society if they have extended understanding of each culture. Those two communities could require profitable impacts instead. In addition, this toleration among different nationalities can build peaceful societies over the seas.

Writing Feedback / "Employees should dress smartly" - Some companies' rules ask their workers to wear a suit [3]

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some companies' rules ask their workers to wear a suit. Meanwhile, others believe that fashion is not necessary because valuable outcome from the employees is more essential. In my point of view, work performance is the most important value while dressing conventionally is not pivotal issue in all corporations.

In common formal sectors, employees have to wear smart dress code in order to give good impression such as trust, credibility, and qualification. For example, people who work in an insurance company must wear neat dress because they have to encourage their clients to open an account in their firm. Therefore, dressing orderly helps staffs doing their job. Nevertheless, wearing such a formal suit has negative impacts as well. Employees might feel uncomfortable and bore to cloth an unfashionable uniform. Hence, it can drop their performance instead.

On the other hand, different companies let their employees wear any kind of cloths. They believe that workers dressing more fashionable are more creative and productive. For instance, Google which is one of the greatest web companies does not regulate a certain rule of dress code. Every staff wears different style of cloths. Hence, they are free to express their personality. As a result, Google claimed that their workers perform their best quality because of the freedom.

In conclusion, apart from work's quality, dress code is a supporting factor for particular companies while other kinds of corporations may not need it. Therefore, I believe that whether dressing smartly or not, it does not matter indeed workers could give their best performance for their organisation.

Writing Feedback / Is fashion an important part of life? [2]

Some people argue that fashion items cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people assume that fashion relates to branded products. Therefore, those think that it is such luxury items. In fact, fashion is an essential need of life so it does not to cost much money. I believe that being fashionable is important for some reasons such as to make first impressive appearance and having good confidence. However, this does not mean that we have to buy expensive things.

Fashion in particularly cloth has advanced since the ancient century. In the earlier ages, it used as a primary necessity in order to keep human from cool temperature or from sunlight. In modern era, fashion is not only a basic need but also a way of life and its function has changed. These days, individuals have dressed on a wide range of cloth designs. They wear it to express their fashion styles or to reach their private intentions like making positive impression when they meet a business partner or relatives. In addition, dressing well and fashionable can make persons feeling good and confidence to interact with others.

On the other hand, people are not supposed to spend a lot of money to acquire it. Fashion depends on each personal income and also how it can fulfil our necessities. Some people on lower wage may obtain their fashion items by purchasing cheaper items in certain markets. For example, in Indonesia there are several markets that offer impressive fashion items with lower price. However, those items can address fashion needs and also basic necessities of cloths for the local inhabitants.

All in all, fashion cannot be separated from human life because it has important function. However, people should not cost too much for it. They can afford to buy those items in alternative market. Therefore, I would like to suggest others to more fashionable by purchase affordable things.

Writing Feedback / Many individuals believe that having independent companies gives them more advantages [3]

Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organization. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?

Many individuals believe that having independent companies gives them more advantages than being an employee in factories or corporations. I personally agree with this opinion because an entrepreneur could obtain more beneficial results than workers get. Although, founding personal business has a small part of risks.

There are two main risks and disadvantages from standing up a new business independently. The one that gives most fraud is the high probability for fail. Most of famous entrepreneurs have dozen of failures. They become succeed by trial and error process. A further disadvantage is that you should have a big financial capital and extra efforts to build your private company. However, most of people avoid this because they have to apply for a large amount of banking loan in order to acquire enough capital. As a consequent, you must pay for its high interest charge.

On the other hand, founding own corporation gives us a big challenge to be more successful. Firstly, it is because we can open a new job vacancy to employ others. In other word, this seems like to be more helpful because helping others might make us satisfy. Another advantage is that it can be earn more money compared to working for other companies. A boss will have more profit from his business than an employee. Moreover, most of businessmen may become a famous one. It is because they have to create a new trend in order to promote their products. Therefore, being an independent worker may make you as prominent as those legendary inventors.

In conclusion, instead of its risks, standing up own business has more advantages than being an employee. Those entrepreneurs might obtain satisfaction, earn more money, and become fame ones. Therefore I am convenient to suggest others to establish their own business.

Writing Feedback / The happiness level of US inhabitants between those who are married and those single ones. [2]

The charts below shoe the results of a survey on happiness ratings for married and unmarried people in the US and the effect of children on overall rating of married couples. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar charts compare the happiness levels of US inhabitants between those have marriage and ones do not have. It also show how having children affected married life. Overall, it can be seen that married people reached higher level of happiness than single ones whereas the percentage of having children did not give significant effect for both married and unmarried people.

Wedded people aged 18-20-year-old was the happiest group in this survey. It obtained about 45 per cent happiness ratings. In the following position were couples in middle age made for 44 per cent. However, those aged 50-64 year-old enjoyed the lowest level of the gladness accounted for 40 per cent.

On the other hand, unmarried individuals had a considerable difference of enjoyment levels compared to married ones. There were three age groups including people aged 18-64-year-old having a similar level of happiness, at around 20 per cent. Nevertheless, elderly who have no legal bond had the highest percentage of happiness for unmarried categories. In fact, having children or not made less sense for the spouses. Those breeding children under 18 years old or above levelled in nearly 44 per cent. In other side, having no children made 43 per cent pleasure ratings for the married couples.

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Writing Feedback / Malte Spitz: Your phone company is watching [4]

This essay is a summary of Malte Spitz speech posted in Tedtalk.com. The original tittle of the video is ''Your phone company is watching''

Mobile phone makes people possible to find out many new activities. However, people have to be aware about self-determination they have. It is related to all data that our mobile companies have. Malte has an experience for asking his data to the companies. He said that he has requested it for several time but the firm rejected it, although they gave it in a number of month later. Malte explained it is important for him because it is his live. He wanted to know what has been done by his self. After he accepted the data he explored it in the internet. He found that the data stored all of his information for six month. Consequently, he claimed if ordinary people have all of their data they can manage their society well. In addition, he showed a blue print of China telecommunication that is a very complex network. He thought that companies have disturbed residents' privacy. Therefore he persuaded others to save their privacy.

Writing Feedback / On Women's Equality Day, More Tech Companies Promise Change [2]

This is a summary of an article posted in wired.com/2016/08/womens-equality-day-tech-companies-promise-change/.

Its original tittle is "On Women's Equality Day, More Tech Companies Promise Change". Women Equality Day for 45 years maybe is a golden opportunity for women in US because of some reasons. Firstly, it can make US residents be aware that women still have unequality. For instance, they earn less money than men in the same interval. Another reason is average of American female are difficult to get higher positions in certain jobs such as among technical positions and at the management level.

However, in this occasion a first foot step to reach women parity had happened. A pledge, the White House Equal Pay Pledge, has been approved by several tech companies included in a new group of Silicon Valley. This commitment is wished as serious intentions of tech giant to overcome gender gaps in US.

Writing Feedback / How a wind turbine will be built and where it is located [4]

The diagrams illustrate how a wind turbine will be built and where it is located. A wind turbine consists of a steel tower, a blade, a wind sensor and a generator. Those are connected to computer system. Wind plants are established in beaches.

Wind turbine is designed to generated energy from wind. Therefore, it is built by set up a steel tower which has three blades made of fibreglass or wood in its top. On the same part, it is completed by wind sensor in order to measure wind speed and direction. As the blades are moved by wind, generator produces 1.5 megawatt electricity. The direction and angle of wind then adjusts with the blades.

The wind plants can be built in to areas closed to coast. One can be located in the depressions while it can produce maximum wind energy if it is set in the hill. The location should be free where the landscape will not spoil the wind turbine. Therefore, a domestic turbine such given by the diagrams can generate 100 kilowatts electricity.

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Writing Feedback / Should the media report ordinary people lives more than celebrities' lives? IELTS WRITING TASK 1 [2]

The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers or footballers. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The lives of public figures get more appreciation from society. This cause mass media write more reports about them. However, many people argue that lives of ordinary persons should be informed more than the celebrities' lives. I personally agree with this opinion because those may have more meaningful story than famous people lives.

Most celebrities like actors, singers or sportsmen have glamour lifestyle. They are accustomed to live in a luxury house or use expensive facilities. As a result, people always curious about them and the mass media use this situation to get more profit. Undoubtedly, it has caused increase of information that share about those lives. However, it is less benefit for one thing that is just gives temporary entertainment. For instance, people may enjoy watching a reality show but they also may become bored soon afterward. Hence, I believe it is useless because it gives less advantage for audiences.

The media are supposed to report benefit information which gives advantages to their customers such to educate people or to inspire others. Some programs that explore ordinary lives are better than celebrities programs. For example, a program called ''Orang Pinggiran" shows lives of the poor and disability persons. It tells the spectators to be more grateful and to help others which have weaknesses. These reports are more meaningful than revealing luxury lifestyle of public figures. The reason is there is there are more important values inside of them.

In conclusion, the mass media should explore more information from ordinary people than famous one because it can share more social values such as kindness and way to be grateful. Therefore, I believe that this information is more valuable than the exploring of celebrities' lives.

Writing Feedback / Summary: Dyslexic Designers Just Think Different-Maybe Even Better [3]

This summary is summed up from an article posted in wired.com. Its original tittle is ''Dyslexic Designers Just Think Different-Maybe Even Better''.

Ordinary people may never think about an exhibit involving dyslexic designers. However, it has run from London to Yorkshire these days. Jim Rokos, a London-based industrial designer, expect that this exhibit can encourage general people to see what dyslexia designer already do. Dyslexia is defined as a literacy disorder in which individual has difficulty to read, write and spell. Unexpectedly, a dyslexic person has great problem-solving skills and amount of creativity. According to Roko's theory, one of five people is dyslexia but it is really hard to identify. Actually, this exhibit will be opened on September 22, Rokos hope that this event could explore a great ability of dyslexia and change others perspective about it.

wired.com/2016/08/dyslexic-designers-just-think-different-maybe-even-better/

Writing Feedback / Suzana Herculano-Houzel: What is so special about the human brain? [2]

This essay is a summary of Suzana Herculano's speech posted in Tedtalk.com. The original tittle of the video is "What is so special about the human brain?"

Suzana said that she has wondered about evidence given by scientific research that related to human brain and asked a question why it is so special. Firstly, does size of human brain make significant difference? We have more number of neuron than other animals. Each person, however, has a brain with average 1.5 kilograms weight. It is almost three times smaller compared to an elephant brain. In fact we have better function of brain. Another question comes from study about time spent by primate for feeding. For instance, orang need 8 hours per day feeding in order to obtain their brain energy. In fact, humans need more energy to make their brain working but this fact means we have to spend ten hours for eating. However, it is impossible for us. Then, she asked what reason that makes humans able to accomplish more advanced way for living than other primates do? According to Suzana, the answer is the invention of cooking. Cooking makes human time for feeding shorter and gives them more time to do other work. Cooking has caused human brain much more functional. Then, cooking has made human the most special among other animal brain.

Writing Feedback / Ontario staffing job for teaching English suddenly fell down (2005-2007 timeframe) to just under 30% [3]

The line graph reveals the percentage of new graduates who found jobs as teachers of English and French in Ontario over a six year period from 2001 to 2007. According to the data, the employment for English-language educators decreased significantly during the period. On the other hand, a trend for French-language teachers witnessed a slight increase with a part of fluctuation. Overall, it can be seen that recruitment for those who teach English became less than before while French teachers experienced a rapid rise from 2001 to 2007.

In the first two years, the proportion of English educators fell from just over 72 per cent to 40 per cent. Data of French teachers, however, went up and down in this period. In the three following years, there was a stable trend not only for the number of English educators but also for French language educators in around 40 per cent and 70 per cent.

Unfortunately, staffing job for teaching English suddenly fell down again to just under 30 per cent from 2005 to 2007. In fact, profession as French teachers decreased of about 3 per cent in 2006 but it peaked at in the end of the period.

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