Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 : Recruitment English Teacher and French Teacher in Ontario between 2001 and 2007 [5]

Topic :

The graph below shows information about the recruitment of teachers in Ontario between 2001 and 2007.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features , and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph gives information about how many graduation who choose become a teacher in Ontario from 2001 to 2007. Overall, although English and French language teachers started the same point in 2001, but they had different result in 2007. When French language teachers remained stable, English Language teachers decreased slightly.

According to the data, from 2001 to 2003, people who work at school as a teacher being recruited declined by 40 percent. In other hand, there was a fluctuation for enrollment of French educationers, starting in 70 percent in 2001,it fell by 19 percent and then grew up again to 69 percent.

In 2003, both of French and English teacher enlisting had slowly increased for over three years. Afterwards, both off these recruitment had the same pattern like in 2001 - 2003 that happened in 2005 - 2007. The number of education bachelor who recruited fell by 25 percent, however the number of French teacher went up and down until reached a peak at 74 percent.

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  Percentage of first year teachers with regular teaching jobs by year of graduation
  

Writing Feedback / The chart gives information about problems that people who live abroad may face. [4]

Topic :

The chart below shows information about the problems people have when they go to live in other countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart gives us information about cities problems when they living abroad. Overall, it can be see that the problems remain stagnant although there are slow fluctuation. The main fact that stand out is middle age inhabitants have the biggest percentage facing the problems.

The greatest problems for people aged 35-54 years old are to manage their heath body at 37 percent. However, older people with the range number over 55 year come last for under 30 percent and the second from the bottom is the youngest individuals. Financial problem become the second biggest problem to handle and the average middle-ages inhabitants still in the first position with 35 percent. The next is the younger people only with one percent difference. The easiest problem for all ages is to get school for their children with under 20 percent and specially grandparents come last about under five percent.

Writing Feedback / Producing electricity using two methods: hydroelectric dam and wave air generator [4]

Topic :

The diagrams below show two methods of using water to produce electricity. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The diagrams show how electricity can be made from water by using two methods : hydroelectric dam and wave air generator. Both of methods have same devices like turbine, spindle and generators. However, wave air generator is more simple than hydroelectric dam.

First, hydroelectric dam consists of gate, resevoir, penstock, turbine, spindle and generator. The process begins when the gate is opened, and the amount of water come into penstock. The quickness of water flow is depending on the width and the angle of the penstock. Fastly, the water head to the generator and twist the turbine and spindle. As the tools rotate, the generator starting to produce electric power and distributed by power lines.

Second, wave air generator consists of chambers, turbine, spindle and generator. The procedure activates when the waves go trough the first chamber and get into the second chamber where locate in the upper floor. In this area, the waves bend the spindle and push the generator to create electricity.

Both of methods have same devices like turbine, spindle and generators. However, wave air generator is more simple than hydroelectric dam.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : Living in the High-Rise Apartment : Lonely Experience or Better Sense of Community [NEW]

Topic :

Some people say that living in a high-rise apartment block is a lonely experience because there is no community spirit. Other say that people who live in high-rise apartment have a much better sense of community than those who live in the houses

When a high-rise flat build in the urban area, citizens usually have their own opinion, some have positive reactions but another have negative one. The ones who have certain opinions say that skyscraper apartments gave us chance to enhance the sense of society. On the other side, they state that they feel lonesome from neighborhood.

If I could tell my opinions, living in the block of flats have many advantages. They usually have public facilities such as spa, gym, swimming pool, and function rooms. All of the spaces make us interacting to the neighbors. Some who against it reply the building create a closed society who are separate from street life. People on the ground cannot see where you are and what are you doing. It is very different when you live in house.

However, the skyscrapers are more accessible for everyone. There are connected area from from our residence which link with grocery shops, malls, restaurant, and other entertainment area allowing us to easily have social gathering for examples : school gathering, business meeting, or community services projects. From my experience as a person who stay in a tall apartment, I easily conduct a meeting with my schoolmate, because we live in the same structure. I don't need much time to spend in the street, so we have more quality time.

In conclusion, some citizens can say high-rise apartments divide us with street life. Nevertheless, we can have better impression to community. It all depends on the way we live in the society itself.

Writing Feedback / People rather choose sitting in the sofa, watch the show, and get information about other countries [3]

Topic :
Some people say that you can learn more about another country by watching television programmes and films about it than by actually visiting it.

How true is this statement? Is there anything you can learn about another country by visiting it that you cannot learn by watching programmes and films about it?

Nowadays, a lot of TV channels broadcast many beautiful places from other countries. People rather choose sitting in the sofa, watch the show they want to know, including the information about other countries. For many, this changed when they began to travel. They started to learn many thing about culture, different types of food, habits, and get personal benefits for experiencing itself than just seeing it in the TV. As a result, they had better understanding by learning their behavior.

However, for some people, their ideas remained unchanged. They believed that we don't have to go to other countries if we only want to learn about them. By having a trip, we just spent our money for nothing. Unfortunately, this is still true today. In my country, Indonesia, despite having a vacation to other country, citizens loved to used their money to buy or used by something important, such as : house, education's bill, health insurance and other equipment, because they think vacation to other countries just for wealthy inhabitants, so for middle classes, learned other nations from screen is enough.

In addition, for some people who don't have so much time to spend, learning from TV is the best options. They just need to switch on the TV, choose the information the want to know, and they will get it in instant. It is very different when they experience it directly. The need to make a plan, choose the date, and other requirements.

In my opinion, therefore learning from experiencing the trip to other countries itself make us have better understanding, but for some middle class citizens like me, watching television is more than enough to get all information from so many countries.

Writing Feedback / Most citizens claim that spectacular landmarks are essential for a town [3]

Topic :
Some people think that large, impresive buildings are important for a city. Others believe that the money should spent on improving schools and hospitals. Disscuss both these views an give your own opinion.

Most citizens say that spectacular landmarks are essential for a town. As many city in other countries built great buildings, sometime they take aside money from improving schools and hospitals. They think goverment should use money wisely by improving schools and hospitals.

Public facilities are the most basic needed for a town. It is a great investment for a city to make better future. The goverment cannot left behind this critical problems because we do not know what will happen in the next ten or twenty years later. If we are not ready facing the global issue, the new challenges and disease problems next are more difficult. However, if goverment only focus on the facilities, I think it is not a wise choice too. There is a reseach about happiness citizens which said if the city make good big buildings for public, it will increase inhabitants happiness. Because, some people in urban area, will spend their free time to go to beautiful places and relax their mind before go back to work. Happy mind means healthy body. Not only for neighbourhood, but also tourist from other area will come and incline city's income. City income can also grows up, because if the building is a well-known enough, many investors will easily invest their money to this town. Afterwards, goverment can use more money to build better public facilities.

Overall, schools and hospitals are important as basic tools for a city, but by build a spectacular building, goverment can get more income to improve more public facilities.

Writing Feedback / Interesting information about two traditional methods used to collect water in the past [3]

Topic :

The diagrams below show two methods of collecting water for irrigation purposes.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams give us information about two traditional methods used to collect water. Overall, both of the methods are useful to the farmland. However, they rely on different power and depth of the water.

The first methods called the swing basket used to irrigate water from the river that is usually 1-2 meters deep to the farmland. The tools consist of basket made of bamboo or leather and tied by four ropes on the all sides. Two people will hold he ropes and get the water from the river. Then, they will swing the ropes, so the water from the basket can splash to the agricultural land.

The other method is rope and bucket. This method is different from the swing basket because it is pulled by buffalo and are not got from humans. The ox is tied in a slope that connected into bucket in the deep well under 50 meters. When the buffalo pulls the slope. the rollers and pulley will moved, and the bucket full of water will come out from well and enter the irrigation channel beside the well.

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Writing Feedback / Is it worth to promote tourism? It has many negative effects on the country and society [2]

Topic :
Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to

How true is this statement? What can tourist do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments?

In the past century, the number of tourist increased to the countries where the travelers go to. At many places, we can easily find people from another countries which were once just locals. I think it has bad impact on these countries.

Firstly, tourism can promote local culture. Because of tourist, local citizens try hard to improve their place, such as make a unique festivals and innovate local food, so other visitor can enjoy their trip and locals can get money from it. However, when they go to sightseeing around looking the culture, it does not mean any problems happens to the local citizens habits. Sometime, visitors bring their habits and culture to the countries they went to. For example, Nowadays, there are so many pub and cafe selling alcohols in Yogyakarta, although the Yogyakarta inhabitants do not drink alcohol. It is just one example, there are many others such as drugs and prostitution.

On the other section, environment also get a big impact of tourism. When tourist season come, many people will gather in one favorite destination, and the destination will become very crowded so congestion are everywhere on the road. Other environment problems are water supply, littering, pollution, and sewage production.

The best solution is make ecotourism in some places. The visitor not only come as a tourist but also can give good impact by helping local citizens keep their nature and culture safe. The other aspect is how goverment make good policies for tourist such as pay fines for littering or use minimum and maximum people who can enter the historical sites so it can reduce the damage of the sites.

Writing Feedback / The amount of money for book clubs received from city council and how it affected members number [4]

Topic :
The graph below shows how much money a city council gave to the book clubs over a four-year period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

You should write at least 150 words

The graph shows the amount of money of book clubs received from city council. The graph also gave information how many book clubs members there were in the city. Overall, there were an upward trend in the number of book club member and the amount of money a city council gave to book society.

Over the four-year period, there were a slight increase in the amount of money that was given. The amount of money rose slowly from first year to the second year.There were a sharp rose in the third year and reached a peak in the same year. However, the customers number fell for the first time in the fourth year.

At the same period, the number of book club members fluctuated. The book club number declined dramatically from year one to year two. Accidentally, same as the money city council gave, the book member clubs also had a significant growth . In year four, the book number still incline rapidly and reached a peak.

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  Council Donation to Book Clubs
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 : The Number of Library Books Read by Boys and Girls at Starmouth School [2]

Topic :
The graph below shows the number of library books read by boys and girls at Starmouth School from 2006 to the present.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relecant

The graph shows information about boys and girls who read books. They are students in the Starmouth School. It shows the trends between 2009 and the present day. Overall, the girls has had stable increased than the boys who has had fluctuation.

According to the chart, the number library books read by the boys grow up slowly from 2009 to 2011 and peaked at 2011 with 100 books. However, suddenly drop came over 20 books in 2012. On the other side, although the girls had minimal incline from 2009 to 2012, it jumped rapidly between 2010 and 2011.

In 2011, both of boys and girls had intersection point because they had the same amount books they ever read in the library after the gradual upward. Nevertheless, they had different path. The girls keep rose the books they read until get a peaked at 140. For the girls, the amount books growing from 2009 to 2012 is 125 books. It was 25 books in the beginning and 140 books in the last. For boys, it was fluctuative from 50 books, reached peak at 80 books in 2011,but dropped to 80 books in the end of 2012.

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  Starmouth School Library
  

Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : People can Only be Happy if They Have a Job They Really Enjoy [3]

Topic :
Some people say that in order to be happy, you must have a job you love doing. Others say that order factors are more important.

Do you think that people can only be pleased if they have a job they really enjoy?

The purpose of working is make a better life or make us richer, so people can buy stuffs they needed. Citizens will spend their lives at working place, so it is important to have a good job to make us happy. But, if someone say that loving our job is the only one to be glad, I'm not really sure about it.

That's true, more than 50 percent, the place of some worker are in the office, so they need to choose the best working environment and represent their skill. However, if you only focus on it, you will not have any experience taking pleasure yourself. Because happiness is not only about working. For example, when you come back from work, go home and meet your family or your children, it can make you blissful.

For some workaholics who really love to labor, spending free time it's not a good thing. But, I believe, although workaholics like it, it must be a time, they feel saturated. They need to do something else to refresh their mind. They can go on vacation, relaxing them self, enjoying the panorama and forgetting everything about job for a while. So, when they come back for toil, they will have healthier mind and body.

In conclusion, having a job you love is not only way to make citizens cheerful. There are other aspects which can make people happy like : meet family often after back from the bureau and spare time for day off to have a trip, so it can revive our mind and easier to get good idea for work.

Writing Feedback / Exhibiting ability in front of television becomed popular among citizens all around the world [2]

Topic :

Televised talent shows have become popular in many societies today

Are these shows a good methods of finding talented people or are they just entertainment

Recently, exhibiting ability in front of television become popular among citizens all around the world. Most of the series can create talented inhabitants into a well known star, also gave a chance for nobody change their lives as rich people.

Using talent show as a media to increase career path faster is the best way to do. For example, Fatin Sidqia, a famous singer from Indonesia, started her journey from a talent show called " X - Factor". Long ago before it, she was a normal high school student, but she want to prove the world that she has an unique voice. Talent show also performs a real process "from nothing into something" from the beginning. First step, they opened a big audition for everyone, Britain's Got Talent for example, accepted all inhabitants with different countries and range of age could enter. Second, the partisipants got exercise and chance to learn from the best tutor, sometimes the judges them self, so they improved their skill. Third, to win the competition, the show use an online platform for citizens to choose their favorite candidate, and it made it impossible for them to manipulate.

However, few television stations use the show just for entertainment. Most of them pretended they would searched brilliant talents, but then end up make their relatives an artist. Although, it doesn't always a bad thing because, if their relatives have a great talent and follow the given rules, so it was no problem.

In conclusion, I think using television channels to find talented citizens is a wonderful thing. People can change their lives that never imagined. The stations also show the whole process so it's unworkable to cheat to turn into successful person.

Writing Feedback / ARTICLE SUMMARY : UNTOLD STORY BEHIND CHILDREN's TALE "The Little Prince" [2]

Time Magazine Lily Rothman : The True Event That Inspired The Little Prince

The Little Prince is a famous children book spreading all over the world. The story is about " Prince ", a curious child, who traveled different planets and met diverse people throughout his journey. However, just few individuals knew about the untruth behind the tale.

The fable is based on a true story, Saint Exupery as the author himself, on his work as a pilot. While Exupery experienced a plane crash accident, he trapped in the spacious desert called Sahara. It was in the middle of 1930, when he was running an airmail from Paris to Saigon. After that, he started to considerate making himself stay awake by imagining something before the Rescue Team saved him. Later on, his idea led him into kid's story book "The Little Prince". The catastrophe is similar to the beginning of the story. Afterward Exupery became a famous person as his book has deep meaning not only for the children but also for the older people.

Few years later, in the 1944, Exupery passed away when he rode plane, working on war investigation. The cause keeps on a mystery.

link : time.com/4255854/little-prince-1943-history/

Writing Feedback / TED Talks : Track Your Happiness; Want to be Happier? Stay in the Moment. [2]

TED Talks Matt Killingworth : Want to be Happier? Stay in the Moment

Happiness is the most interesting word. In instant, we will think about smiling people or person, and then started to think about our self, having a big luxurious house, having an extravagance car, or maybe getting a good job with great salary. However, it becomes a paradox, when individuals get what they want, it doesn't mean that they become happier folks. Many scientists have debated what caused happiness for a long time. Using scientific methods and demografic, the scientists experiment what is the big causes of happiness. There are four major points : income, education, gender, and marriage, but if talking about general is contents of moment to moment experience, what we are doing, and what we are thinking about.

Killingworth found an application which can help citizens trail their cheerfulness in the real time. The residents need to download the application first in the trackyourhappiness.org .There are three step to make this app works : first, make an account in the apps; second, answer the questions; third, track your happiness; fourth, you will get your happiness report. Seeing the data, more than 650,000 instantaneous result , over 15,000 inhabitans arround the world, and more than 80 countries are already using it.

link : ted.com/talks/matt_killingsworth_want_to_be_happier_stay_in_the_moment#t-217100

Writing Feedback / An info - how long it took to go arround the city before and after the transport was improved [2]

The table and bar chart show how journey times in a city centre changed after improvements were made to the transport network, and the costs of using different forms of transport in the city.

Sumarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows how long it took to go arround the city before and after the transport network was improved. The bar chart tell how much it costs to use different type of the transport in the capital.

Taxi was the fastest vehicle before and after the upgrade. The other hand, tram took less tim than bus journey just about four minutes differences, but after the improvement it turned out six minutes different . Tram still served faster than before. The cheapest one to have a trip was by bus, it was around 0.40 poundsterling so that it made a big gap between bus and taxi, and it is very useful for backpacker who needed cheaper accommodation. The other alternative for rambler was tram, because the price was cheaper than taxi, although higher than bus. For others who need luxury they can use taxi as their choice.

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  Methods of Transport
  

Writing Feedback / The Beauty and Darkside of Fireflies [3]

TED Talks Sara Lewis : The Loves and Lies of Fireflies

Fireflies are wonderous creatures living in the noctural world. They are like magic, charming and charismatic lominous insect which always make our childhood memorable.

The shape of fireflies by evolutionary types are natural selection (strugle of survival) and sexual selection (reproductive opportunity).

In this world, fireflies belong to beetles cluster with about 2,000 species and more than 100 varieties are from North America. All of this species was very similar, especially 115,000 years ago, when male fireflies used tentakles at day to snifed perfume of by female firelies. Only female setted up the light million years later.

The glow is amazingly beautiful started at youthful fireflies. They use it to save themself from predators as endurance for their childhood. When they grow up after spending two years becoming larvas, they just need two week to think about sex life. The masculilne fireflies use the brightness to fascinate female. They using light as silent conversation to talk each other. The males bllink the beam and if the female attracted, they will answer with a blinking glow too. After that, the female will see which one them have the longest light to choose as partner. They will have sex all day along, attached each other.

The great lominous also has a darkside. To survive, fireflies have toxic to against predators. When the toxic exhausted, they need it from other fireflies genus. This other class will distract "the silent conversation", and if they lucky enough they can get closer enough from the other type and started to drink blood. The blood is very useful to manufacture protective chemicals. The biologist call them a vampire fireflies.