|Home / Writing Feedback [23,282] - page 224 of 389|
|Both sides have very valid points; GUN CONTROL
2 - In your last paragraph you say you need to take a side, so what's your opinion? Make it clearer....
Writing FeedbackAwarren - Dec 28, 2013 / iacero - Dec 28, 2013
|Many tertiary institutions; University should accept gender equality in classes
Writing Feedbackasdrubaljimenez - Dec 27, 2013 / dumi - Dec 27, 2013
|Is competition good? Yes and No both!
3 - Hope this article would help you polish this essay further; Competition is a contest between people or groups...
Writing Feedbackjaclyn1 - Dec 27, 2013 / dumi - Dec 27, 2013
|BENEFITS OF READING
Writing Feedbackvenguyen - Dec 19, 2013 / venguyen - Dec 27, 2013
|LEAVING YOUR COUNTRY TO LIVE OR STUDY ABROAD: ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES
3 - "overseas" is the right word. Migrating to more developed countries is a good opportunity for an individual to...
Writing Feedbacknybui212223 - Dec 26, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 27, 2013
|GRE Issue Essay - Scandals are more useful than speakers or reformers - feedback
Writing Feedbacknpbart - Dec 25, 2013 / npbart - Dec 27, 2013
|Getting advice from friends who are older vs friends of your own age
4 - Well, it is better to preserve a general tone throughout your essay. Your topic is not directed at...
Writing Feedbacksclee2090 - Dec 25, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 26, 2013
|'Babasaheb Ambedkar'; hich one person in the history would you like to meet?
Writing Feedbackakshayj25 - Nov 22, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 26, 2013
|ART SHOULD NOT BE FUNDED BY THE GOVERNMENT; AGREE/ DISAGREE?
4 - sree_raj Thanks sree_raj, its a nice essay with lot of information and good vocab.I'm making a note of...
Writing Feedbacksree_raj - Dec 19, 2013 / raj_ielts - Dec 26, 2013
|IELTS(Introduction)- Technology Vs Communication/Using Computer/Women in army
Writing FeedbackArun0506 - Dec 26, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 26, 2013
|Some people believe in co-educational classes and others believe in segregated ones
3 - Great advice by Pahan and Misterwandering and it's really good to have you guys around !Take those points they've...
Writing Feedbackminaf - Dec 24, 2013 / dumi - Dec 26, 2013
|IELTS Task 2 - Facing Change vs Avoiding Change. Discuss and give opinion.
3 - Hi Mayara, Your second paragraph sounds like saying the same point again and again. May be you can try...
Writing FeedbackmayaRa - Dec 26, 2013 / Arun0506 - Dec 26, 2013
|TOEFL; What is the most important room for you? playstation in my bedroom
3 - Yes, this is very important for us to understand your writing better and provide meaningful feedbacks. Anyway, your...
Writing Feedbackokaert - Dec 24, 2013 / dumi - Dec 26, 2013
|enthusiastic generation; Who brings up the children: Parents or Teachers
6 - Merry Christmas to you too Arun! ... actually, there is a thing called imprinting. It is that...
Writing FeedbackArun0506 - Dec 23, 2013 / dumi - Dec 25, 2013
|No human being is exactly alike - CLEP composition exam
Writing Feedbackpsjoyce46 - Dec 23, 2013 / akhilles97 - Dec 24, 2013
|IELTS essay : Young people move to cities
4 - However, this phenomenon may cause several negative consequences. "There can be no doubt" - this unnecessarily...
Writing Feedbackgabbie - Dec 22, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 24, 2013
|Entertainment, culture, heritage - What do we need music?
5 - .... this sentence is confusing. I think you have chosen the word advocate without knowing its proper meaning...
Writing Feedbackfarideh - Dec 21, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 24, 2013
|Integrated TOEFL essay; Unexpected effects
3 - First and admin request - You should open new threads for all TOEFL essays in Writing Feedback forum. Also,...
Writing FeedbackApik - Dec 22, 2013 / dumi - Dec 24, 2013
|Every year some languages die out; language as the most important achievment
3 - ..as the most important achievement we have made... ..as many languages have been developed , each language has its...
Writing Feedbackfatihy007 - Dec 9, 2013 / niesaysi - Dec 24, 2013
|Why do we need music? 'effect on the infants'
8 - you said that which music was more important.This sentence can be true but you have to say that which...
Writing FeedbackHelpmepassIELTS - Nov 26, 2013 / okaert - Dec 23, 2013
|IELTS; Both parents, father and mother, are indispensable to grow up a child
Writing Feedbackeagle112 - Dec 21, 2013 / eagle112 - Dec 23, 2013
|INTEGRATED WRITING; Globalization leads to a similarity of nations
Writing FeedbackAbrorjon_20 - Dec 22, 2013 / dumi - Dec 22, 2013
|GRE Analytical Writing - Argument Essay - Adams Realty and Fitch Realty
NEW - Hello! I would very appreciate reviewing of my first writing for GRE. I especially need the evaluation of my...
Writing Feedbackichibanchi - Dec 22, 2013 / — -
|Countries should not isolate themselves from the world but instead engage other countries.
8 - If the hook is so problematic for you, jut forget it and start with the background part of the...
Writing FeedbackBullet32 - Dec 8, 2013 / dumi - Dec 21, 2013
|TOEFL essay: People benefit more from traveling in their own country than foreign country
2 - @ Ninita - I provided you with a structure to construct your introduction. I wish you follow that. Do...
Writing FeedbackNinita - Dec 21, 2013 / dumi - Dec 21, 2013
|Toefl; Self studying or studying with a teacher?
4 - thank you so much pahan for your helping.In toefl essay, I need to develop my ideas very quickly, therefore...
Writing Feedbackokaert - Dec 16, 2013 / okaert - Dec 21, 2013
|When students evaluate their teachers, teachers can know what they need to improve themselves
4 - Well, I think it is better if you take some extra care in presenting your essay. Everything seems cramped...
Writing Feedbackphuongnam95 - Dec 13, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 21, 2013
|Internships are required for university students in order to graduate.
3 - Your whole essay looks like just one paragraph. That's no good dear :( What is this writing for? TOEFL...
Writing Feedbackgabiglima - Dec 13, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 21, 2013
|Food is easier to prepare; life's more convenient for people, save a lot of time
Writing Feedbackebychris - Dec 21, 2013 / Ninita - Dec 21, 2013
|The educational process - Parents are the best teachers?
7 - That's very kind of you.thanks 4 ur encouragement. pls always have time to review my work,i believe with your...
Writing Feedbackebychris - Dec 19, 2013 / ebychris - Dec 21, 2013
|Same amount of money for students' sports activity/ university library?
Writing Feedbackftn - Dec 20, 2013 / ftn - Dec 20, 2013
|Introduce yourself : Tell me about your family ? Tell me about your house ? ..
5 - Well, I find the first sentence is not adding any value to this response. Pleasure and enjoyment always deal...
Writing Feedbacklequangninh - Dec 18, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 20, 2013
|IELTS task two essay about job satisfaction
Writing Feedbackhastihyt - Dec 20, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 20, 2013
|Ielts essay; in what way the money should be spent.
2 - this sounds a bit odd... compensate damages of the wars? You could have said some people struggle to...
Writing Feedbackhandsome7boy - Dec 20, 2013 / dumi - Dec 20, 2013
|Overpopulation; Effects and Solutions
2 - I guess you are preparing for IELTS. It is good to mention this purpose in the title itself so...
Writing Feedbackbloodkid - Dec 15, 2013 / dumi - Dec 20, 2013
|IELTS-More and more people want to buy famous brands of clothes, cars and other items.
5 - Why would you link famous brand products to fake items, instead more people would feel comfortable with the idea...
Writing Feedbacktiyuok - Dec 12, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 19, 2013
|GRE Essay - Analyze an Argument (Assumptious Managers)
2 - Hi, I'm way underqualified to critique the content of your GRE essay but I found a few grammatical errors....
Writing FeedbackHenryCastillo91 - Dec 19, 2013 / Liyuan - Dec 19, 2013
|''TOEFL'' any children can be an expert in every distinct of creativeness because of technology
Writing FeedbackNinita - Dec 15, 2013 / Ninita - Dec 19, 2013
|Toefl ; Who are the best teachers? If parents are able, they should teach them.
3 - .... this has some grammar errors; First, the children are very dependent on their parents. It is a...
Writing Feedbackdeisem - Dec 18, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 19, 2013
|Television damaged our interactions and made us disconnect from each other for several reasons.
3 - Before the TV was introduced, the family members had better interactions and more private time for the family...
Writing Feedbacklast - Dec 18, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 19, 2013
|I plan to live in the United Kindom!
Writing FeedbackkodyBlurton - Dec 18, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 19, 2013
|IELTS 2: Should governemts spend money on art?
2 - ... actually, you need not to give examples in the introduction. Your body paragraphs are the places meant...
Writing FeedbackAlexielts - Dec 18, 2013 / dumi - Dec 19, 2013
|Private funding for education may encourage citizens to become less dependent on a governments
6 - Ok.... the easiest way to handle both the quality of writing and time is to follow an essay structure...
Writing Feedbackdaniel280187 - Dec 17, 2013 / dumi - Dec 19, 2013
|IELTS: parenting courses in school
Writing Feedbacklippea - Jan 20, 2011 / znack - Dec 19, 2013
|IELTS 2: Food travels thousands of miles from the farm to the consumer. Good or Bad
Writing FeedbackAlexielts - Dec 12, 2013 / Alexielts - Dec 18, 2013
|IELTS; Importance of academic and non-academic subjects
5 - thank u dumi...
Writing Feedbackhandsome7boy - Dec 16, 2013 / handsome7boy - Dec 18, 2013
|College and attaining a degree will give you a chance to more successful career.
Writing Feedbackpratisharora - Dec 17, 2013 / dumi - Dec 18, 2013
|With the advent of television in the XX century, people started to change; we became better persons
4 - Thanks for your feedback everybody. Thanks for your mark. The point of asking you for evaluation is...
Writing Feedbacklast - Dec 17, 2013 / last - Dec 18, 2013
|IELTS: Some people believe that students should study a wide range of subjects. Others,
5 - Students will benefit from learning a wide range of subjects which can facilitate their life and career.However ,it is...
Writing Feedbackzhengda - Dec 17, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 18, 2013
|IELTS; The Internet Vs Newspapers - Which is more powerful?
4 - I suggested you the appropriate structure for the introduction in your other thread and hope you would follow...
Writing Feedbackhandsome7boy - Dec 16, 2013 / dumi - Dec 18, 2013
|IELTS letter- apologise to your friend for not being able to meet him/her
Writing FeedbackFrankZheng - Dec 17, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 18, 2013
|Internet and video games; ASSIGNMENT
Writing Feedbackoad94 - Dec 16, 2013 / dumi - Dec 18, 2013
|Six different categories of families living in poverty in Australia - report
2 - I think you have written this in preparation of IELTS Task 1. It is always good to mention the...
Writing Feedbackzyxily - Dec 15, 2013 / dumi - Dec 18, 2013
|TOEFL: It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends
3 - Well ... your essay looks like a direct answer to the prompt. However, you need to present it in...
Writing Feedbacksivian - Dec 15, 2013 / dumi - Dec 18, 2013
|Video Games and the American Dream [Help with a Naysayer]
Writing FeedbackDizonl - Dec 1, 2013 / ali ahsan123 - Dec 18, 2013
|TOEFL:Some people prefer to work for a large company; international conferences
5 - I'll put in some comments about your grammar. As mentioned by Sivian easier already has a comparative...
Writing Feedbacklast - Dec 15, 2013 / Liyuan - Dec 17, 2013
|There are many types of music in the world today; 'mental disease therapy'
Writing FeedbackJOYCE TENG - Dec 17, 2013 / znack - Dec 17, 2013
|Charity began at home - helping others essay
3 - Charity is about helping people either with money or other forms of aids such as medicine, clothes and...
Writing Feedbackakhalifa - Dec 16, 2013 / dumi - Dec 17, 2013
|IELTS- Workers in traditional industry (doctors, nursing and teachers)
7 - Yes, this is much better than what you wrote previously. :) People hold beliefs / People believe...
Writing Feedbackvmagic - Dec 13, 2013 / dumi - Dec 17, 2013
|Humankind is interested to imitate novel things, since he opened his eyes in this world
6 - youhold an opinion Also, I prefer if this fits in with the structure I suggested to you above. Conclude...
Writing FeedbackNinita - Dec 14, 2013 / dumi - Dec 17, 2013
|Home / Writing Feedback|