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|Caring - UBC: "Tell us about who your are and what are you proud of?"
3 - Your essay reflects your honest opinions, making it really compelling and unique. You also did a really great job...
Undergraduateastrous - Dec 28, 2020 / navss - Dec 28, 2020
|The practical values of Liberal Arts - WESLEYAN ADDITIONAL ESSAY
4 - Your response does not fit the prompt. The last paragraph should be the overall basis of your expanded response....
Undergraduatetoodii2102 - Dec 27, 2020 / Holt - Dec 28, 2020
|My success - who you are - University of British Columbia Personal profile essay
2 - Dear Meugen, I honestly feel the first paragraph is waste , when you could have talked about things you...
Undergraduatemeugen - Dec 27, 2020 / akalo - Dec 28, 2020
|sparkles in their eyes' - Some students have a meaningful background, identity, interest, or talent
2 - Hi! I suggest that you should summarize the title of your essays to short but appealing phrases that could...
UndergraduateBelsuSeyran - Dec 25, 2020 / toodii2102 - Dec 27, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile Unfamiliar Situation - Baseball Team Manager
Undergraduatenavss - Dec 26, 2020 / navss - Dec 27, 2020
|UBC - tell us about who you are: Coding/humor
2 - @geetang Don't start a paragraph with like you should start withI was inspired by movies... and make the...
Undergraduategeetang - Dec 26, 2020 / Ariana Parker - Dec 27, 2020
|UBC - tell us about who you are: I got into computer science because i missed a tournament
3 - @senseofhumour Thank you for feedback. I was trying to show how coding formed a large part of my personality...
Undergraduategeetang - Dec 25, 2020 / geetang - Dec 26, 2020
|Graduate Early from High School Prompt
2 - The change or your progression through high school should be explained in this statement. I am not sure what...
Undergraduatetyouts - Dec 25, 2020 / Holt - Dec 26, 2020
|UWATERLOO - HELP AIF FOR MECH ENG, MATH, CS
6 - All comments are appreciated! Here is a completely new take, fits the character count and sounds pretty juicy to...
Undergraduatemakineau - Dec 23, 2020 / makineau - Dec 24, 2020
|My first business - draft of personal statement - University of Victoria
2 - Rather than mentioning an actual age in the essay, which often works against your application, you would do better...
Undergraduatevmoretti - Dec 24, 2020 / Holt - Dec 24, 2020
|Waterloo AIF Nanotechnology Engineering program
5 - @makineau Thanks a lot for your advice!! I did a bit of research about clubs in Waterloo and include...
Undergraduategigi1924 - Dec 23, 2020 / gigi1924 - Dec 24, 2020
|Robotics - essay about how MIT align with my goals.
5 - @toodii2102 @Holt Hello, i have develop a completely new essay with your recommendations. One of my biggest goal...
Undergraduatedane0305 - Dec 22, 2020 / dane0305 - Dec 24, 2020
|Culture Shows & Campus-wide brain parties - WELLESLEY SUPPLEMENT ESSAYS
2 - There are 100 reasons why you would want to choose the university and you focused on only one aspect?...
Undergraduatetoodii2102 - Dec 23, 2020 / Holt - Dec 23, 2020
|A Dream of an Artist with a learning Disability
UndergraduateAriana Parker - Dec 23, 2020 / Ariana Parker - Dec 23, 2020
|What is Important to you? And Why - Bond with my mother
4 - This does not respond to the question. Sure the bond with any parent is important to a child. Most...
Undergraduatesimonp00 - Dec 21, 2020 / Holt - Dec 23, 2020
|Born in Columbia - Tips for my MIT transfer essay
Undergraduatedane0305 - Dec 19, 2020 / hphatmessi - Dec 22, 2020
|How overcoming depression shaped me.
2 - Two things that need to disappear from this discussion are the quotation at the start, which does not make...
Undergraduateiamnotsure - Dec 20, 2020 / Holt - Dec 21, 2020
|People around me - UBC Personal: What is Important to you
4 - @Holt @ekawanda Hi, thank you for your response! I was having similar doubts about my topic so this advice...
Undergraduateapinkpie - Dec 20, 2020 / apinkpie - Dec 20, 2020
|Neuroscience major - WELLESLEY SUPPLEMENT ESSAY
2 - Do not keep repeating your college major in your responses. This is starting to become a tiresome topic in...
Undergraduatetoodii2102 - Dec 18, 2020 / Holt - Dec 20, 2020
|AN ADVENTURER - PS TO VANDERBILT UNIVERSITY
3 - Hope these help. ... and friends, and in another[b]there was a secret place ... ... saw me always...
Undergraduatetoodii2102 - Dec 16, 2020 / akalo - Dec 18, 2020
|UBC personal profile - Environmental Club - Tell us about who you are.
3 - @Holt would it be better if I switched the whole "When I set my mind to something I...." spiel...
Undergraduatesuchicha - Dec 17, 2020 / suchicha - Dec 17, 2020
|Design projects - review my Cornell's prompt
3 - @Holt Can I discuss my interest about solving problem in the architecture as a specific aspect of architecture ?...
UndergraduateMariopc7 - Dec 16, 2020 / Mariopc7 - Dec 17, 2020
|Describing Work activities in the essay for The University of British Columbia
3 - Hi! I think you should use stronger and more descriptive verbs such as "augment", "host", "manage", "led", "organize", "attract",......
UndergraduateDeen1911 - Dec 8, 2020 / toodii2102 - Dec 16, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile Question 2020 - Response to an unfamiliar situation
Undergraduatehngminh215 - Dec 16, 2020 / hngminh215 - Dec 16, 2020
|Why I wanted to be an Explorer - Personal Statement WELLESLEY UNDERGRAD
4 - @Holt Hello Mary, your feedback almost killed my soul but it is very helpful :) I've written another PS...
Undergraduatetoodii2102 - Dec 15, 2020 / toodii2102 - Dec 16, 2020
|Personal statement with a focus on what you learned from and felt during an extracurricular activity
4 - @Holt Thanks for the feedback, but I'm afraid that the essay will be longer than 1500 words. What should...
Undergraduatescythe - Dec 13, 2020 / scythe - Dec 15, 2020
|Why I chose the New York University Abu Dhabi - to learn about the world
3 - The first 3 paragraphs of this essay are throw away presentations. You are not explaining why you chose to...
Undergraduatewhoisyulia - Dec 14, 2020 / Holt - Dec 15, 2020
|Essay for application in the textlixes, merchandising and fashion design department in a korean uni
UndergraduateHellothere123 - Dec 13, 2020 / Hellothere123 - Dec 14, 2020
|Persistent-UBC Personal Essay- Tell us about who you are
Undergraduateeve1112 - Dec 14, 2020 / eve1112 - Dec 14, 2020
|Attributed to William Hastie, Amherst Class of 1925, the first African-American to serve as a judge.
2 - This is not an impressive essay response. The situation you presented, the stuttering in relation to your participation in...
Undergraduatesuhelsrandhawa - Dec 12, 2020 / Holt - Dec 13, 2020
|THE ART OF EXPLORING - COMMON APP PROMPT #1
Undergraduateochurus_drafts - Dec 8, 2020 / ochurus_drafts - Dec 9, 2020
|An exuberant boy - UBC ESSAY - Tell us about who you are
2 - There is too much reference to "I" in this essay when the question asks about "They or them". How...
Undergraduateik4y3d - Dec 8, 2020 / Holt - Dec 8, 2020
|Describe how you can apply the knowledge gained from your master studies to contribute to your home
2 - This essay was almost a total throw away. That is, until I reached the last portion of the final...
UndergraduateAkinola98 - Dec 6, 2020 / Holt - Dec 7, 2020
|UBC Essay - My way to react to an issue and/or an unfamiliar situation
2 - The essay should have a singular topic for its focus. At this point, you are merely narrating all of...
Undergraduatevchndr - Dec 6, 2020 / Holt - Dec 6, 2020
|University of British Columbia Essay - How would you describe yourself?
2 - The reviewer will read this and know that you are writing about yourself, using other people as the reference...
Undergraduatebrothify - Dec 6, 2020 / Holt - Dec 6, 2020
|NTU Scholarship Essay - Personal Importance - How a simple incident in my life had motivated me
2 - The essay that you wrote is nothing more than a suck up presentation, hoping that making it seem like...
UndergraduateNahrafe - Dec 6, 2020 / Holt - Dec 6, 2020
|"You're such a mom" - Yours and others opinion about yourself
2 - It is an incorrect response to the prompt. Tell us about who you are always asks you to present...
Undergraduatedorkystudent - Dec 3, 2020 / Holt - Dec 3, 2020
|Undergraduate Common App Essay - "Mirror-crafter"
3 - @Holt Thank you! Your insight is always helpful. I'll change the prompt and title to accommodate the essay....
UndergraduateLc10077917 - Nov 30, 2020 / Lc10077917 - Dec 1, 2020
|Tell us your biggest fear (this is the prompt). To being bullied
3 - As Holt mentioned earlier, I think this essay focused more on overcoming previous conflicts rather than describing the biggest...
Undergraduatekthienfighting - Nov 29, 2020 / Lc10077917 - Nov 30, 2020
|A problem and/or an unfamiliar situation essay - delegating tasks to solve long line issue
2 - This is a highly effective response essay. As far as I am concerned, your essay portrays you as a...
Undergraduateknices - Nov 30, 2020 / Holt - Nov 30, 2020
|UBC personal profile question on how you dealt with unfamiliar and difficult situation
5 - Merged: UBC personal profile question on how you dealt with unfamiliar and difficult situation try #2 I...
UndergraduateSofiaJohnson - Nov 29, 2020 / SofiaJohnson - Nov 30, 2020
|UC Application Essay: leadership + forming a black student union
3 - Being a co-leader is not the same as being a leader. As a co-leader, you shared responsibilities and decision...
Undergraduatestargirl21 - Nov 28, 2020 / Holt - Nov 29, 2020
|College Entrance Exam practice — I have a dream
3 - You should try to avoid using 2 quotations in a single personal essay. Kicking it off with the quote...
UndergraduatePeggy1116 - Nov 28, 2020 / Holt - Nov 29, 2020
|Insulting words - Tell us your biggest fear
3 - @Holt thank you so much for the evaluation!! I have one question: What I fear most is the widespread...
Undergraduatekthienfighting - Nov 28, 2020 / kthienfighting - Nov 28, 2020
|Wonderland - The prompt is what is your favorite word and why
3 - You cannot make your favorite word the title of the response and then never mention it within the essay....
Undergraduatehahasowhat - Nov 25, 2020 / Holt - Nov 26, 2020
|Shy, curious, analytical - UBC Personal - Tell us about who you are.
4 - What the contributor Holt said is important, you should change your writing and describe yourself based on the opinion...
Undergraduater1852z - Nov 24, 2020 / ItziMh - Nov 25, 2020
|UBC - Application essay which define who I am
Undergraduatexxdior - Nov 25, 2020 / xxdior - Nov 25, 2020
|Black History - the most important Activity essay for UBC PERSONAL PROFILE!
Undergraduateseun1234 - Nov 24, 2020 / seun1234 - Nov 25, 2020
|Yale Essay - How COVID-19 helped me manifest a dream
3 - Hi, It is difficult to review this essay because there are several essays that Yale requires their students to...
Undergraduateprathamchawla - Nov 23, 2020 / Holt - Nov 24, 2020
|UBC - tell us about who you are: intiative-taker
Undergraduateturtleneckturtle - Nov 23, 2020 / turtleneckturtle - Nov 23, 2020
|UBC 1. How you responded to a problem and/or an unfamiliar situation - work shift
Undergraduatesauderacceptme - Nov 22, 2020 / sauderacceptme - Nov 22, 2020
|Initiative - What is important to you? And why? UBC PERSONAL PROFILE
2 - Reviewers really dislike applicants who open their responses with a quote from a well known figure. While you think...
Undergraduateemmmyyy - Nov 21, 2020 / Holt - Nov 22, 2020
|My future after high school graduation - Help With Clearly Expressing My Personal Qualities
3 - We no longer offer proofreading as a part of our free services. For that, you need to make this...
UndergraduateSwoleMcBro - Nov 20, 2020 / Holt - Nov 21, 2020
|Time Management - Tell Us About Who You Are UBC Personal Profile Question
2 - There is a lack of clarity in some of your sentence presentations. For example: - I have always been...
Undergraduatejenniexd - Nov 20, 2020 / Holt - Nov 20, 2020
|Freedom - the right to choose. What is most important to you and why?
5 - The most important thing to me is equality of the girl child. The struggle for equality is an ongoing...
Undergraduatetemiajare - Nov 17, 2020 / temiajare - Nov 19, 2020
|Extremely opinionated - Tell us about who you are. UBC application essay
5 - @Mazid1989 I appreciate your contribution. The question was "Tell us about who you are. How would your family, friends,...
Undergraduatetemiajare - Nov 17, 2020 / temiajare - Nov 19, 2020
|The most important thing to me is family - UBC Personal Statement
3 - @Holt thank you so much for your comment. I'll work on other things that I value which play important...
Undergraduatexkq0802 - Nov 18, 2020 / xkq0802 - Nov 19, 2020
|A creative family - What is important to you? And why? UBC APPLICATION
3 - Your response is not properly focused. You are discussing creativity in relation to your family. Which has led you...
Undergraduatejosh b - Nov 18, 2020 / Holt - Nov 19, 2020
|Why Tufts essay about me having many interests
UndergraduateCong Nguyen Chi - Nov 8, 2020 / temiajare - Nov 17, 2020
|Well-balanced and fulfilling life - APPLICATION FOR UBC -- TELL US ABOUT WHO ARE
4 - Generally well written essay but I would advise a look at your sentence beginnings. Variety is the hallmark of...
Undergraduatechrispereira - Nov 7, 2020 / temiajare - Nov 15, 2020
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