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|Why I decided to try in school - AIF Waterloo; tell anything else about yourself
4 - You need to write a new supporting statement. It is alright to brag, in a less direct manner in...
Undergraduatehowardturtle - Jan 19, 2020 / Holt - Jan 20, 2020
|The Reason Why I Am Interested In Engineering And Willing To Perform Well
5 - Can you provide the complete prompt for this essay so that a proper review of your work can be...
Undergraduatetheone2020 - Jan 19, 2020 / Holt - Jan 20, 2020
|AIF For Software Engineering (More About Your Goals)
2 - Without access to the actual prompt you are responding to, I cannot really tell you that you are responding...
Undergraduatetheone2020 - Jan 20, 2020 / Holt - Jan 20, 2020
|Why I'm not motivated in highschool
3 - I'm not sure if lack of motivation is what they're looking for, typically I believe this is used for...
Undergraduatehowardturtle - Jan 17, 2020 / georgiaberg - Jan 20, 2020
|International issues - Personal Statement for Applying to undergraduate course at NUS
7 - Have you tried build your own games? You can elaborate more on that. What programming language or platform did...
UndergraduateLemonBreadKing - Jan 1, 2020 / Ulaai - Jan 18, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile: Importance of a Balanced Life
3 - I am afraid that the essay ran away from you and the prompt itself. What you discussed was more...
UndergraduateFamai - Jan 4, 2020 / Holt - Jan 18, 2020
|Moving to the Philippines - NTU: event or incident you have encountered personally
2 - What is missing in this essay is the actual impact of how these immersive experiences on you as a...
Undergraduatejtjt99 - Jan 18, 2020 / Holt - Jan 18, 2020
|One employment opportunity - it's impact and the greatest learning outcome for me
2 - As of the moment, what I think is implied in the essay is that you are a self-centered person...
UndergraduateSakyo107 - Jan 16, 2020 / Holt - Jan 17, 2020
|UW AIF Part B: Question 4. Data Science / Machine Learning
2 - This statement is meant to get to know you beyond your interest in Data Science and Machine Learning. I...
Undergraduatejust_a_gene - Jan 16, 2020 / Holt - Jan 17, 2020
|Uw AIF for computer science coop. Part A Question 1
3 - As Holt mentioned, try to be more specific in your goals and what led you to them. For example,...
UndergraduateIR_567 - Jan 16, 2020 / just_a_gene - Jan 16, 2020
|Writing my personal statement on moving states and finding myself
2 - Try to make this essay stronger by explaining what research path you wish to take. If it is laboratory...
Undergraduatenormsauce - Jan 15, 2020 / Holt - Jan 16, 2020
|'to make a difference in Prague' - ERASMUS MUNDUS SCHOLARSHIP: TOURISM DEVELOPMENT AND CULTURE (MSC)
2 - The last paragraph should be the opening paragraph of this essay. It carries your actual motivation for your desire...
UndergraduateVitova6 - Jan 15, 2020 / Holt - Jan 16, 2020
|My plans are connected with Indonesia if I'll be not able to receive the scholarship (100 words max)
3 - Your response sounds too relaxed for the prompt provided. You need to take a more serious tone in response...
Undergraduateandreazarina - Dec 30, 2019 / Holt - Jan 15, 2020
|"adaptable" - UBC application essay----tell us about yourself
2 - You only responded to the last part of the essay regarding what you are proud of. You failed to...
Undergraduatekarmalea - Jan 15, 2020 / Holt - Jan 15, 2020
|Engineering as a major - China student enrolling in USA
3 - @Holt I really appreciated your response, and I tried to fix my answer by the order of question that...
UndergraduateHotDragon10 - Jan 13, 2020 / HotDragon10 - Jan 15, 2020
|I am putting forward my candidacy for enrollment in electrical engineering of an University
2 - Don't just rely on Elon Musk and his accomplishments in the field of neural science to prove your motivation...
Undergraduatemoog2001 - Jan 14, 2020 / Holt - Jan 15, 2020
|COMMON APP, is this necessary? Details of circumstances or qualifications...
3 - This part of the application essay is optional because it has to do with some factors that may exist...
UndergraduatePabloEscobar - Dec 25, 2019 / Holt - Jan 14, 2020
|Tell us about who you are. How would your family, friends describe. (UBC personal profile)
4 - It would be better if you used a different personality trait for every section required in the essay. The...
UndergraduateArmaanS - Jan 5, 2020 / Holt - Jan 14, 2020
|Waterloo Engineering and AFM AIF - Accounting and Financial Management
UndergraduateWaterCivEngAFM - Jan 14, 2020 / WaterCivEngAFM - Jan 14, 2020
|The band that I organized by myself. Activities that are most important to you
Undergraduaterichardli0124 - Jan 14, 2020 / richardli0124 - Jan 14, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile: What is important to me (Ikigai - a simple, but fulfilling philosophy)
2 - The last paragraph of this essay should really be the first paragraph because that is the direct response to...
Undergraduatehumairak - Jan 13, 2020 / Holt - Jan 14, 2020
|Social anxiety, academic failure - My Common App Personal Statement
4 - "Show, don't tell" is vital to writing an engaging essay, and this is the point students struggle with most....
UndergraduateLearn2Do89 - Jan 8, 2020 / sky004 - Jan 13, 2020
|Unfortunate circumstances - UBC essay question for admission
3 - The essay doesn't respond to the prompt. You are telling me about your brother with special needs when the...
Undergraduateaaron_20222 - Dec 30, 2019 / Holt - Jan 13, 2020
|Ivey MSc Business Analytics - Technical and Quantitative Aptitude
2 - The essay sounds more like you explaining what you understand about the course objectives. You come across more as...
UndergraduateXindy - Jan 9, 2020 / Holt - Jan 13, 2020
|UBC application essay--- What is important to you? And why? To respect one another's views.
2 - The theme of the response should be found in the first paragraph. Since respecting the point of view of...
Undergraduatekarmalea - Jan 13, 2020 / Holt - Jan 13, 2020
|ADMISSIONS ESSAY: TELL MORE ABOUT YOU. RELATE ONE/MORE EXPERIENCE AFFECTING YOUR DEVELOPMENT.
2 - The essay theme is a good one. However, the presentation is not very good. It suffers from proper editing...
Undergraduatethaithu - Jan 10, 2020 / Holt - Jan 13, 2020
|UBC PERSONAL PROFILE - study of psychology (WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO YOU AND WHY)
2 - The title of your essay could use some improvement. It is not as eye-catching nor interesting as you might...
Undergraduateharsh003 - Jan 10, 2020 / Holt - Jan 13, 2020
|Canada summer 2018 - Social10. Your reaction to a problem and/or an unfamiliar situation
UndergraduateEstellaL - Jan 6, 2020 / EstellaL - Jan 13, 2020
|Energetic boy / family love - UBC personal profile_Tell us about who you are
Undergraduatejane2020 - Jan 11, 2020 / jane2020 - Jan 12, 2020
|SOP for Research Internship (machine learning project)
2 - The essay is too informal in presentation. Since you are writing an academic essay, you have to avoid placing...
UndergraduateShan99 - Jan 8, 2020 / Holt - Jan 12, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile essay - About my aspirations and describing myself
Undergraduatekathleenjeanne - Jan 4, 2020 / Holt - Jan 11, 2020
|Queen's Commerce PSE - ECs Impact and Learning Outcome, value of collaboration
2 - I do not feel as if you have properly reflected the lesson in cooperation and community in the 2nd...
UndergraduateUyenN272 - Jan 3, 2020 / Holt - Jan 11, 2020
|Square ONE - Common app essay suggestions
2 - There are several development plot points in your essay that require further attention in order to tie the essay...
UndergraduateDaisy7703 - Dec 31, 2019 / Holt - Jan 11, 2020
|Society goals - WHY WOULD YOU BE A GREAT PARTICIPANT FOR THE GLOBAL UGRAD PROGRAM? #ESSAY 1
2 - Sam, your essay provides a generalized review of how you view your country and leadership skills. Unfortunately, these types...
UndergraduateSoukeang Sam - Dec 25, 2019 / Holt - Jan 10, 2020
|Solar Cooking - WashU Supplemental: Something that sparks your interest and curiosity
UndergraduateJiaxin Ye - Dec 23, 2019 / Jiaxin Ye - Jan 3, 2020
|Arabic music rhythm. Last minute Stanford Application Essay
2 - @Abraham29 HI there. Welcome to the forum. I hope that my feedback suits you well. While I find...
UndergraduateAbraham29 - Jan 1, 2020 / Maria - Jan 2, 2020
|UBC Personal Profile: The Idealistic Dreamer
3 - @Maria Thanks for the feedback! Actually, the essay doesn't even have a title, I just included it to highlight...
UndergraduateFamai - Dec 26, 2019 / Famai - Dec 29, 2019
|Good habits - what you learned from and felt during curricular and/or extracurricular activities
2 - Hi, here are some suggestions for you. 1.You may want to rearrange the proportions, emphasizing more on the...
UndergraduateLongho22042001 - Dec 20, 2019 / Emily Chiang - Dec 24, 2019
|UBC Personal Profile #1: To Grow and Excel
NEW - This is the first question on UBC's personal profile. I essentially talked about how my character has evolved over...
UndergraduateYQUnionville - Dec 24, 2019 / — -
|UBC Personal Profile - A person of Family and Friends
2 - It's great overall. But I think you can elaborate more on "stepping away from safe zone" because the sentence...
UndergraduateDhiyoU - Dec 21, 2019 / Jiaxin Ye - Dec 23, 2019
|My race has made me both the insider and outsider - Duke University
2 - It's great overall. But I'm not quite sure of what you mean by "both an insider and an outsider"....
Undergraduatesleepyshamrocks - Dec 19, 2019 / Jiaxin Ye - Dec 22, 2019
|Even The Most Random Decisions Can Cause A Major Turn In Your Life
3 - @Maria Thank you so much, am an international student and writing isn't my strength at all but I would...
Undergraduateitukuboy - Dec 17, 2019 / itukuboy - Dec 21, 2019
|Cite any cases you practiced cooperation, sharing, conflict management describe what you have learnt
Undergraduatekimvu123456 - Dec 17, 2019 / kimvu123456 - Dec 20, 2019
|Living for the society - I gave this essay for my college application
UndergraduateLalith_Boi - Dec 19, 2019 / sleepyshamrocks - Dec 19, 2019
|The story of hedgehog. Common App Essay / Personal Statement about a period that sparked my growth
UndergraduateJiaxin Ye - Dec 18, 2019 / Jiaxin Ye - Dec 19, 2019
|Do you think that it's relevant ? -Globa UGRAD Program : What is your definition of a great leader?
2 - @FairuzDhiaKhalis Hi. This will be my feedback on your writing. While I appreciate the straightforward answer on the...
UndergraduateFairuzDhiaKhalis - Dec 17, 2019 / Maria - Dec 18, 2019
|Discovery - What attracts you to Duke? - Duke University essay
2 - @sleepyshamrocks Hi. Thanks for approaching the forum! Here is my feedback. While I appreciate the general topic you...
Undergraduatesleepyshamrocks - Dec 16, 2019 / Maria - Dec 16, 2019
|My Purpose and Qualities- Global UGRAD Program : Why would you be a great participant ?
2 - @FairuzDhiaKhalis Hi. Here is my feedback on your writing. While I think that the first paragraph is decent...
UndergraduateFairuzDhiaKhalis - Dec 16, 2019 / Maria - Dec 16, 2019
|UBC- Reading buddy - ONE or TWO activities listed above that are most important to you.
2 - @ubcessayhelp Welcome here! I'll provide you with feedback on your writing. I think that the activity you have...
Undergraduateubcessayhelp - Dec 16, 2019 / Maria - Dec 16, 2019
|From Germany to Florida - UBC Personal Profile: "Tell us about who you are..."
Undergraduatetararanganatha - Dec 7, 2019 / tararanganatha - Dec 16, 2019
|UBC- personal profile - Your reaction to the problem and/or an unfamiliar situation.
3 - @Rachell Welcome to the forum. As a contributor, here is my feedback on your essay. Making sharper and...
UndergraduateRachell - Dec 12, 2019 / Maria - Dec 14, 2019
|(PERSONAL STATEMENT) Write a letter to your future self to read on your graduation day.
Undergraduateim da one - Dec 11, 2019 / im da one - Dec 12, 2019
|UBC Personal profile question: Club - Important activities - Hackathon
2 - @marethyu12 Hello, welcome to the forum! Here's my feedback on your writing that I hope will somehow be of...
Undergraduatemarethyu12 - Dec 4, 2019 / Maria - Dec 6, 2019
|Law and Humans - UCAS University Law Personal Statement Essay
2 - @melissafng Hi! Welcome. I'm here to provide you with feedback on this write-up. I hope this helps somehow. ...
Undergraduatemelissafng - Dec 4, 2019 / Maria - Dec 6, 2019
|CommonApp Essay support: kind of attributes conveyed, revew and improvements
UndergraduateBastian - Dec 3, 2019 / XPROFF - Dec 5, 2019
|UBC Personal Profile, List One or Two Substantial Activities.
3 - There are some minor proofreading errors such as missing articles ...to find a common ground on... and errors of...
Undergraduatemguo - Dec 1, 2019 / Bastian - Dec 3, 2019
|Beyond the silence! / Personal essay / Common App : Discuss an accomplishment, event....
3 - I think your topic of choice is really phenomenal and the way you've weaved it into a story of...
Undergraduatezabdou - Dec 1, 2019 / Bastian - Dec 3, 2019
|SSRF - motivation letter for applying a project
UndergraduateChenxi_D - Dec 3, 2019 / XPROFF - Dec 3, 2019
|Hockey and losing weight - UBC Personal Profile: Tell us about who you are?...
3 - @Arsidhu Hello there. I hope you're doing well. This is my feedback on your writing that I hope somehow...
UndergraduateArsidhu - Nov 30, 2019 / Maria - Dec 2, 2019
|Most Important activity: volunteering a Zither store/ UBC personal Profile
2 - @k009999 Welcome to the forum! I hope my feedback gives you somewhat of an idea of how to improve...
Undergraduatek009999 - Dec 1, 2019 / Maria - Dec 2, 2019
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