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Research advice on TOEFL, SAT, IELTS, GRE and other academic essays (page 4)

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(IELTS Essay) In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large

2 - The second sentence in your prompt restatement is a problem. While it does represent a part of the original...

Writing Feedbackaurangzaib517 - Feb 24, 2023 / Holt - Feb 24, 2023
[Ielts 1] The proportion of school boys, based on two groups of age, who took part in various sports

3 - I'm not an expert but I think there are some major errors in this report 1. The data is...

Writing Feedbackceewlz - Feb 23, 2023 / Sachin341 - Feb 24, 2023
Task 2: Some people believe that governments should take large proportions of people's salary

4 - @Holt Thanks for feedback, I'll look forward to correct my mistakes....

Writing FeedbackSachin341 - Feb 23, 2023 / Sachin341 - Feb 24, 2023
TASK 1 the percentage of people of different age groups who watched a movie in cinema once a month

5 - @claireorg Though your response is somehow meeting the task requirement, I think you need to work on the...

Writing Feedbackclaireorg - Feb 22, 2023 / aurangzaib517 - Feb 24, 2023
The proportion of jobless women in 4 different countries of Britain in 2013 and 2014

2 - Do not forget that the task 1 essay always uses plural word references. None of the information that is...

Writing Feedbacksomeoneishere - Feb 12, 2023 / Holt - Feb 24, 2023
WRITING TASK 1: The graph below shows consumers' average annual expenditure on cell phone, national

2 - Try to stay under the 200 word count for the task 1 essay. The last thing you would want...

Writing Feedbackpigchienn - Feb 22, 2023 / Holt - Feb 23, 2023
Sugar-based drinks trend in mordern life

3 - From my experience , you have a grammar and vocabulary knowledge but you need to use more connect words...

Writing FeedbackKieuVan - Feb 22, 2023 / Panjasrose - Feb 23, 2023
The benefits for Vietnam as a member of international organisations

3 - From my experience ,Your essay do not go straight to the main point but the content is good ....

Writing FeedbackNguyencki - Feb 20, 2023 / Panjasrose - Feb 22, 2023
IELTS 1: Number of visitors to Louvre, Vatican Museums, London Science Museum, and Shenzhen Museum

3 - There are some serious issues with your essay in my opinion.... 1. This line ..... Looking at the details...........to...

Writing FeedbackDat Nguyen - Feb 20, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 21, 2023
TASK1: The given line graph illustrates the average carbon dioxide emissions per person, 1967-2007

3 - I feel the main problem with this report is underdeveloped and incorrect data. Example of undeveloped data..It moderately increased...

Writing FeedbackDat Nguyen - Feb 19, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 20, 2023
Free time on my smartphone - Writing task 2: Direct question

3 - Merged: Redone Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time on smartphones. I've rewritten...

Writing Feedbackrishabhk4896 - Feb 10, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 20, 2023
Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime

3 - Okay so there are many errors in your essay but most significant are these: Spelling errors.. these can cost...

Writing Feedbackdaidang869 - Feb 19, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 20, 2023
TASK 2: Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious problems,

3 - You used " on the other hand" twice in two different paragraph. It might lead to misunderstanding...

Writing Feedbackduonghien - Feb 18, 2023 / Dat Nguyen - Feb 19, 2023
Online shopping is increasing dramatically. How could this trend affect our environment?

3 - Modern way of transaction via social networks may not a strong argument. Because online transaction based on e-banking system...

Writing Feedbackquoctinhdk25 - Feb 14, 2023 / Dat Nguyen - Feb 19, 2023
"Depression" - An experience that has shaped my character

2 - Who placed the call? I know you are going for dramatics here but, dramatics without proper buildup just...

Writing Feedbackthaonhhi29 - Feb 19, 2023 / Holt - Feb 19, 2023
Ielts writing task 2: Economic growth, environment damage

2 - The first paragraph is not completely developed. You did not present your clear opinion, either in support of one...

Writing FeedbackAndrew198 - Feb 18, 2023 / Holt - Feb 18, 2023
IELTS WRITING PART 2: buy product made in other countries

2 - The prompt restatement will receive a failing score as it is not a prompt restatement but rather, the beginning...

Writing Feedbackzth - Feb 17, 2023 / Holt - Feb 18, 2023
In the near future, car without drivers can be created. Do you think this development is positive?

2 - This essay would normally receive an automatic failing score because it does not meet the 250 minimum word count...

Writing FeedbackPanjasrose - Feb 17, 2023 / Holt - Feb 18, 2023
People are consuming more and more sugar-based drinks. Why? What can be done to reduce sugary drink

2 - Although you have managed to achieve a good word count in the essay, I am afraid the final score...

Writing Feedbacklinaa121 - Feb 17, 2023 / Holt - Feb 17, 2023
IELTS WRITING PART 2: Printed newspapers - some people say we don't need them anymore

2 - The prompt restatement and writer's opinion is well developed. The thesis statements are clear to the examiner and fully...

Writing Feedbackmatchanh - Feb 16, 2023 / Holt - Feb 17, 2023
IELTS 1: The given diagram demonstrates the figure for shops closing and opening from 2011 to 2018

3 - @Holt Thank you so much for your constructive comment!...

Writing Feedbackanhnhat - Feb 12, 2023 / anhnhat - Feb 16, 2023
Social vs academic qualifications - Ielts task 2

2 - The writing task gives you a full 1 hour to complete your tasks. 20 minutes for the first task,...

Writing Feedbackredchild - Feb 16, 2023 / Holt - Feb 16, 2023
The main factors causing less productive agricultural land, and how it affects three world regions

2 - This is an automatic fail essay based on the 138/150 word count. When the word count minimum is not...

Writing Feedbacknguyenthiminh180 - Feb 15, 2023 / Holt - Feb 16, 2023
IELTS WRITING TASK 2 (topic : international aids to poor countries)

3 - @Holt I wrote the essay with 2 reasons in 2 different paragraphs. I don't really understand your comment about...

Writing Feedbackdathao - Feb 14, 2023 / dathao - Feb 15, 2023
IELTS WRITING TASK 1: The chart shows requests for information at a tourist office in the UK

3 - @Holt Thank you for replying to me! Your advice helps me a lottt. After reading your advice, I have...

Writing Feedbackhnathu - Feb 13, 2023 / hnathu - Feb 15, 2023
The pie chart below shows the share of Oscar winners by film genre for 2003 and 2008.

2 - The number of pie charts and what sections each pie chart represents should be a part of the summary...

Writing Feedbackharleneeee - Feb 14, 2023 / Holt - Feb 15, 2023
WRITING TASK 1: Police budget sources and their use in 2017 and 2018

2 - This is a failing task 1 essay. The major problems I found here have to do with C+C and...

Writing FeedbackPnnm604092 - Feb 13, 2023 / Holt - Feb 14, 2023
IELTS Students who gave a ''very good'' rating to the resources

4 - @rishabhk4896 thank you so much <3...

Writing Feedbackxuanmai2911 - Feb 12, 2023 / xuanmai2911 - Feb 13, 2023
IELTS 2: Country is already rich, any addition in economic wealth does not make its citizens happier

3 - Thanks very much for your comment. I noticed my high verbosity and will try my best to improve....

Writing Feedbackd2507 - Feb 12, 2023 / d2507 - Feb 13, 2023
Essay about educational policy which favor certain subjects

2 - The prompt restatement is slightly incorrect. The first presentation, which you are restating does not indicate that the government...

Writing FeedbackNamLeHanoi - Feb 12, 2023 / Holt - Feb 13, 2023
Even though governments have worked hard to bring about improvements in the healthcare system

2 - Avoid exaggerations in the prompt restatement. This paragraph in particular must be as true to the original presentation...

Writing Feedbackkesky101 - Feb 12, 2023 / Holt - Feb 13, 2023
IELTS WRITING TASK 1: The chart shows the percentage of people born in and outside of Australia...

3 - Your number of sentences is quite short for writing task 1. Moreover, the descriptive comparison is quite simple. Especially...

Writing Feedbacknh_thanhnha - Jan 30, 2023 / someoneishere - Feb 12, 2023
Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through online learning - pros and cons

2 - While some people truly type quite fast and could manage to click off a series of sentences within the...

Writing Feedbacksomeoneishere - Feb 12, 2023 / Holt - Feb 12, 2023
Ielts Writing Task 1: The supplied line graph indicates the consumption of beef, lamb and fish

4 - Also I notice other small mistakes: taken => took, stayed remain over a period of ten years => remained,...

Writing FeedbackTommy Jasper - Feb 9, 2023 / someoneishere - Feb 12, 2023
IELTS Writing task 1 - Museum Maps

4 - You did a great job keeping the word count around 200. The numbers included in the bulk, are outstanding...

Writing Feedbackrishabhk4896 - Feb 10, 2023 / someoneishere - Feb 12, 2023
The bar chart below gives information about four countries' spending habits of shopping on consumer

2 - An examiner would consider this task 1 essay under developed because it contains only the minimum word count number....

Writing Feedbackmoonsun06_56 - Feb 11, 2023 / Holt - Feb 12, 2023
The rise in the production of consumer items leads to the damage of the natural environment

3 - I think the essay is very well written but most of the sentences are in informal language, like cause...

Writing Feedbackwho know - Feb 11, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 11, 2023
Technology inventions making people socially less interactive

3 - I think this essay is overdone and you need to understand the essay type prior to plan your essay....

Writing Feedbackthanhtammm - Feb 10, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 11, 2023
Writing task 1: Top seven movie genres from 1995 to 2005

2 - 235 is considered an overwritten task 1 report. It is impossible to complete this type of long form analysis...

Writing Feedbackdominhhieupro69 - Feb 11, 2023 / Holt - Feb 11, 2023
Essay about whether technology has made shopping today easier or not.

2 - The opening statement is acceptable but could use improvements in relation to the effectiveness of the restatement and opinion....

Writing FeedbackThanhvinhtran - Feb 10, 2023 / Holt - Feb 11, 2023
[IELTS WRITING TASK 2] The role of constructing free libraries in town.

2 - You should "render" your position at the start of the essay to meet the task accuracy requirement for a...

Writing Feedbackjeangrrr - Feb 10, 2023 / Holt - Feb 11, 2023
The annual expenditure on cell phone, national and international fixed-line services of Americans

3 - I found these mistakes yearly expenses ... from 2000 and 2001 to 2010. phone services had...

Writing Feedbackhuukim - Feb 9, 2023 / rishabhk4896 - Feb 10, 2023
Rich countries often give financial aid to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty

2 - 323 words would not be easily achieved in an actual test. Not if you are aiming for properly developing...

Writing Feedbackmariachiarafico - Feb 9, 2023 / Holt - Feb 10, 2023
Expenses for mobile phones, domestic and global fixed-line, and services in America

2 - This is another example of an overwritten and impossible to complete within 20 minutes task 1 essay. the task...

Writing Feedbacksomeoneishere - Feb 9, 2023 / Holt - Feb 10, 2023
TASK 2: Would it be better for children to grow up in rural areas or cities?

3 - I think most of the problems I saw have been resolved by @Holt. Nevertheless, the most important aspect of...

Writing Feedbacklehmy - Feb 9, 2023 / Ahmadjb225 - Feb 9, 2023
Artificial intelligences and their role in modern life.

2 - The one thing that a task 2 essay does not do is over discuss a given topic to the...

Writing FeedbackGiorgi_2059 - Feb 9, 2023 / Holt - Feb 9, 2023
Is the primary function of music to reduce stress?

2 - You have a presentation over 300 words here. While it allowed you present a proper reasoning series, it affected...

Writing Feedbackquocdat - Feb 8, 2023 / Holt - Feb 9, 2023
Task 2 - Caring for children is important in any society

2 - The response provided contradicts itself. The writer used the term "concur" which literally means "I agree" but, in the...

Writing FeedbackMinh Tri - Feb 8, 2023 / Holt - Feb 8, 2023
ielts writing: Describe a city that you have visited (Ha Noi)

4 - @tsyiaa99 thanks a lot...

Writing Feedbackhuychamchi - Feb 3, 2023 / huychamchi - Feb 7, 2023
The essay about the question: Should people restrict video games?

3 - ... many disputes between ... or schools (excessive). In fact (unsuitable transition) In my opinion, electronic games are thought...

Writing Feedbackdinhhavan16 - Feb 7, 2023 / mylittlepony - Feb 7, 2023
The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten

4 - It much better to replace "they prefer eating them to the main dishes" with " they prefer to eat...

Writing Feedbackyennguyenkim - Feb 1, 2023 / tsyiaa99 - Feb 7, 2023
A positive situation of owning a home rather than renting one

5 - Hi @han0212! There is one mistake that I noticed in your essay is the word "theirselves". It has to...

Writing Feedbackhan0212 - Jan 30, 2023 / selenakieu - Feb 6, 2023
Opinion are varied when it comes to the social media website

4 - Afterof + V_ing For example. in your essay you write "...are created for the purpose of connect people together."...

Writing Feedbackphuongnhi - Jan 29, 2023 / selenakieu - Feb 6, 2023
Video Platforms - IELTS WRITING TASK 2 - AGREE OR DISAGREE?

2 - This is an extent essay so an emotional response is required or a reference to an unmeasured (dis)agreement. It...

Writing Feedbackspinode111 - Feb 6, 2023 / Holt - Feb 6, 2023
WRITING TASK 2: Do the advantages of studying abroad outweigh the disadvantages?

3 - @Holt Thanks for your comment!...

Writing Feedbackselenakieu - Feb 6, 2023 / selenakieu - Feb 6, 2023
Summarise the information from the chart about passing the driving test in Asia

2 - The summary overview will receive a failing preliminary score. This is due to your inability to restate the given...

Writing FeedbackLee99 - Feb 4, 2023 / Holt - Feb 5, 2023
[Toeic Writing Part 8 ] Some companies block their employees from using social media network.

2 - The presentation is not grammatically perfect but works for the purpose of the writer. While there are some incorrect...

Writing Feedbackmrhuyprono1 - Feb 4, 2023 / Holt - Feb 4, 2023
Writing task 2: Should violent criminals' personal information be made available to the public?

3 - Regarding the introduction, it is my view that you should not mention your personal opinion since this essay is...

Writing FeedbackHeo Nguyen - Jan 28, 2023 / Camtu25 - Feb 4, 2023
IELTS WRITING TASK 2: State investment in medical research or environmental protection

NEW - Governments should spend more money on medical research to protect citizen's health rather than on protecting the environment. Do...

Writing FeedbackCamtu25 - Feb 3, 2023 / — -
Food advertising should be banned the same as smoking is since overeating is harmful as smoking.

3 - @Holt Thank you for your response!...

Writing Feedbacktrananhthu686 - Feb 1, 2023 / trananhthu686 - Feb 2, 2023

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