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Researching and writing effective scholarship essays (page 5)

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The Introvert - SEAYLP Application: Why is participation in this program important to you?

2 - This is a personal reason that definitely helps add a different touch to the application. However, this cannot be...

Scholarshipnotngoc - Dec 31, 2022 / Holt - Dec 31, 2022

Statement of purpose for pursuing a Bachelor of Computer Science in Hungary.

8 - @ahad checkout other people's SOP to get an insight of how to convert your achievements and education background, relevant...

Scholarshipahad - Dec 10, 2022 / itachi99 - Dec 26, 2022

Global Issues - ACADEMIC OBJECTIVES AND INDICATE HOW THESE ARE APPROPRIATE TO YOUR LONG-RANGE GOALS.

4 - Try to be a little more genuine. Although it is very well written, I think you do not need...

Scholarshipanaluglii - Dec 21, 2022 / bvalkyrianzz - Dec 22, 2022

Leadership Essay Chevening - Sustainable Fashion

2 - I would not refer to modern slavery in this discussion. The screener is not interested in controversial topics. most...

Scholarshipdalrashid - Dec 19, 2022 / Holt - Dec 19, 2022

Bachelor's degree in computer science - scholarship essay for UK universities

2 - There are 2 aspects of this essay that need to be addressed. The first is the section about the...

Scholarshipitachi99 - Dec 18, 2022 / Holt - Dec 18, 2022

NTU Scholarship Essay - Personal Importance - Belief systems

3 - Beware of the negative sentences you put in your presentation. Remember that an essay is a descriptive interview, a...

ScholarshipExceptional - Dec 18, 2022 / bvalkyrianzz - Dec 18, 2022

Passion for Fashion - GKS U Personal Statement 2023

3 - Thanks for your advice.I will try to write another personal statement ....

ScholarshipAlexaaaDay - Dec 17, 2022 / AlexaaaDay - Dec 17, 2022

Study Plan- COMMONWEALTH SHARED SCHOLARSHIPS - the University of Cambridge

3 - @Holt Thank you for the insights. Corrections were made accordingly....

ScholarshipPettypet - Dec 12, 2022 / Pettypet - Dec 16, 2022

Being A Student, A Daughter, A Human Being, and Everything in Between

2 - Do not make blanket assumptions Not everyone grieves in the same way. There are people who do not...

Scholarshipchelseaanasts - Dec 14, 2022 / Holt - Dec 15, 2022

GLOBAL UGRAD Essay 1: I know what I can change and what I have to do!

2 - Skip paragraphs 1 an 2. Those are irrelevant to the prompt focus so the screener will not appreciate the...

ScholarshipLa_la - Dec 12, 2022 / Holt - Dec 12, 2022

More than just school or studying - Global UGRAD Program

2 - The screener will not pay attention to the information in this essay as it does not pertain to community...

ScholarshipOmar_E - Dec 11, 2022 / Holt - Dec 12, 2022

Question : Discuss the differences between the condition in your country now and in the past

2 - Indonesia only became independent 77 years ago. The internet is approximately 39 years old. Therefore, the internet discussion is...

Scholarshipshafirazsya - Dec 11, 2022 / Holt - Dec 11, 2022

Different experiences - Why am I a great candidate for Global Ugrad ?

3 - thank you so much for your feedback, there is a section in the application that asks for the varied...

ScholarshipMeriem slimani - Dec 2, 2022 / Meriem slimani - Dec 2, 2022

Erasmus Personal Statement: GLOCAL Global Political Economy (Track F)

2 - I do not think that consequence is the correct term to use in this case. Consequence refers to a...

Scholarshipmaroksklaut - Nov 30, 2022 / Holt - Dec 1, 2022

Africa and Poverty - personal statement

3 - ... poor family and grew up in a small poor village.... I failed to see the coherence between the...

Scholarshipsimion - Nov 20, 2022 / Bun cha - Nov 25, 2022

Erasmus Mundus - Excellence in Analytical Chemistry (EACH) Motivation Letter

2 - Try to develop the research team participation in the essay since that is an essential part of the discussion....

Scholarshipkuronoma_sawako - Nov 13, 2022 / Holt - Nov 13, 2022

Grandmother and Dominican Republic - my application for Global Ugrad

2 - The aim of the writer is incorrect. The target of the essay should not be what the applicant hopes...

ScholarshipNanya_26 - Nov 12, 2022 / Holt - Nov 13, 2022

Energetic, hardworking and ambitious - great participant in the Global UGRAD Program

2 - The essay is too self centered. Being a Global UGrad participant, the applicant should show a sense of community...

ScholarshipKjavier - Nov 7, 2022 / Holt - Nov 7, 2022

e-health challenge * Leadership and influence

2 - This is a good start to responding to the question. As we both know, the Chevening scholarship is looking...

ScholarshipMamka - Oct 30, 2022 / Holt - Oct 31, 2022

Things that need to be improved - Chevening - leadership essay

2 - The essay is very technical in presentation. It does not carry an ounce of humanity in the leadership and...

Scholarshipidoremi - Oct 29, 2022 / Holt - Oct 29, 2022

Challenges found in Indonesia fashion startups: A Chevening Essay on Studying in the UK

3 - Hi, You have to state clearly why Chevening should select you for the scholarship award not the other....

ScholarshipHlong54 - Oct 21, 2022 / segrid15 - Oct 28, 2022

Master of Fine Art RESEARCH PLAN for MEXT Scholarship Japan 2022

3 - @holt Thank you so much for your advice! It makes sense how i should open it with Indonesia first...

Scholarshiphojichalovers - Oct 26, 2022 / hojichalovers - Oct 27, 2022

Erasmus Mundus Scholarship - Global Market Local Creativities personal statement - Study Track B

2 - You asked, I obliged. Here is the review. The second paragraph would make for a more direct and...

Scholarshipcosmos1171 - Oct 19, 2022 / Holt - Oct 20, 2022

My Performance - Leadership and Influence essay for Chevening

2 - This presentation is not very effective as it does not provide specific instances of leadership nor influencing situations in...

ScholarshipTheYodash - Oct 18, 2022 / Holt - Oct 19, 2022

Commonwealth Scholarship development impact p.1; Climate change poses a huge problem for the planet

2 - Since the writer has not provided the complete essay in response to the given prompts, I find it difficult...

Scholarshipnajam - Oct 15, 2022 / Holt - Oct 16, 2022

The cosmetics market value - Chevening scholarship

3 - Thank you for the reply. Of course that i have professional experience but not in that field. What i...

ScholarshipDelya - Oct 14, 2022 / Delya - Oct 15, 2022

Study abroad - Language Plan for Global Korean Scholarship

3 - @Holt Thank you so much for the directions I did feel like I missed some details and needed advice....

Scholarshipdumbandpabo - Oct 7, 2022 / dumbandpabo - Oct 7, 2022

I want to bring awareness of wildlife conservation. Commonwealth Scholarships - Personal Statement

4 - Well explained essay. Try to also include the reasons for applying to your university of choice...

Scholarshipshraddha1997 - Oct 4, 2022 / Pettypet - Oct 6, 2022

Wildlife conservation. Commonwealth Scholarship - Personal Statement

2 - Since the applicant already has a previous MS certification, his paper should be sounding more professional and more career...

ScholarshipSgogoi - Oct 6, 2022 / Holt - Oct 6, 2022

Digitalization in Indonesia - Career Plan for Chevening Essay

2 - What does the visa policy for Chevening students have to do with the career plans? That is an irrelevant...

Scholarshipaulia - Oct 5, 2022 / Holt - Oct 6, 2022

Chevening Study Essay - Career Change to Arts and Illustration Field

2 - Unfortunately, the Chevening Scholarships are not meant for students who are looking to create a career change for themselves....

ScholarshipTanzeelaWasti - Oct 4, 2022 / Holt - Oct 5, 2022

Master's degree in Korean language and literature - Goal of study and study plan

2 - The goal of study and study plan for a graduate student must be approached based upon the career plan...

ScholarshipSubhratri - Oct 3, 2022 / Holt - Oct 3, 2022

"For the longest time I dreamed"- GKS- U Personal Statement

4 - Hi Mowa, I think you should delete that part where you talk about becoming a pediatritian, that part...

ScholarshipMowa - Sep 22, 2022 / kiale - Oct 2, 2022

Ambitious things in life - ugrad SOP

4 - I think you should try to give more personal motivations into your SOP in order to be an outstanding...

ScholarshipKenChicken - Sep 20, 2022 / leo0528 - Sep 30, 2022

Scholarship essay for M.A Learning Science

2 - The discussions provided are relevant but does not highlight anything special about the applicant. Since this is a scholarship...

ScholarshipChukwuagozie - Sep 29, 2022 / Holt - Sep 30, 2022

Questbridge Personal Essay - Context in which you grew up - "Life in America"

4 - @Holt Thanks for the feedback, my teacher said the same thing. I'll be sure to edit it....

Scholarshipsaady1519 - Sep 23, 2022 / saady1519 - Sep 27, 2022

Using what you know about Edtech in Africa and Arizona State Uni, why are you interested in this?

3 - Thank you very much for your feedback...

ScholarshipChukwuagozie - Sep 26, 2022 / Chukwuagozie - Sep 27, 2022

GKS - Study plan Language Before and after (Undergraduate); practice journal and Korean classes

2 - The prior to arrival activities for language development of both English and Hangul are good enough. It shows that...

Scholarshipmiesse - Sep 26, 2022 / Holt - Sep 27, 2022

Questbridge Short Answer Essay - Proudest Achievement/Moment; I led prayer at the Islamic center

2 - The essay feels under developed. While the first and second paragraphs are striking and somewhat memorable, there is a...

Scholarshipzamzap - Sep 26, 2022 / Holt - Sep 27, 2022

Names can determine one's destiny; the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspiration

2 - The context in which you grew up and formed your aspirations should not be focused on the name pronounciation...

Scholarshiphli6855 - Sep 25, 2022 / Holt - Sep 26, 2022

College prompt for the scholarhip essay on my proudest achievements happened so far

2 - Left what? Home? School? An organization? This sentence should set up the whole statement instead, it confuses the...

Scholarshipaytaiwo - Sep 25, 2022 / Holt - Sep 26, 2022

Public Health methods - CAREER PLAN - COMMONWEALTH SCHOLARSHIP

3 - @Holt Thank you for the insights. I'll make improvements bearing in mind your inputs....

ScholarshipPettypet - Sep 23, 2022 / Pettypet - Sep 25, 2022

Mastery Choir - QuestBridge National College Match Short Answer

2 - This essay is good in terms of narration. It delivers a strong connection between the accomplishment and the overall...

Scholarshiplt3737 - Sep 23, 2022 / Holt - Sep 24, 2022

COMMONWEALTH SCHOLARSHIP: Development Impact statement

2 - We have a one essay per thread policy here so I can only provide advice on the first post....

ScholarshipPettypet - Sep 22, 2022 / Holt - Sep 23, 2022

I am interested in Kpop. 2023 GKS-U language study plan to improve foreign languages.

6 - I agree with @Mowa. The mention of Kpop might be a phrase/ statement used by so many applicants. I...

ScholarshipHannakei - Aug 31, 2022 / Pettypet - Sep 22, 2022

KGSP - personal statement - physics; I see a versatile and significant vocation

4 - @Holt Thank you for your advice! :)...

Scholarshipkiale - Sep 14, 2022 / kiale - Sep 22, 2022

Digitally talented person. Chevening Scholarships: Leadership & Influence

2 - This is neither the kind of leadership nor influencing essay that will make it past the screening round. It...

Scholarshipinekeyuliam - Sep 21, 2022 / Holt - Sep 22, 2022

Economics GKS personal statement undergraduate - public economics

2 - The essay is highly informative and well developed. That is the problem with the presentation. The writer has used...

Scholarshipgeovannafrra - Sep 18, 2022 / Holt - Sep 19, 2022

Accounting - Statement of purpose for POSCO Scholarship

4 - I am not a teacher, it is just my humble comment depending on my experience, so don't be so...

Scholarshipnitakajole - Sep 13, 2022 / mt30 - Sep 15, 2022

Economics and Abroad - GKS U personal statement; WHAT MAKES YOU WISH TO STUDY IN SOUTH KOREA?

4 - I did something similar in my first draft, and after I read it it felt kind of childish and...

ScholarshipMabel09 - Sep 13, 2022 / cruellapoisonz - Sep 15, 2022

KGSP: STUDY PLAN FOR CHILD AND FAMILY STUDIES

2 - Remove the link to the website. The reviewer is not going to bother to peruse it so save the...

ScholarshipSarah009 - Sep 13, 2022 / Holt - Sep 14, 2022

Personal Statement - INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS ADMINISTRATION - GKS 2023-U

3 - Hello i think you need to do a research first about the ideal essay structure and you dont have...

ScholarshipOH Mari - Sep 12, 2022 / nitakajole - Sep 13, 2022

Korean films - KGSP Scholarship for undergraduate . GOAL OF STUDY PLAN

NEW - Korean films Korean films was one of the big factors that made me decide to pursue a major...

Scholarshipmylife1234 - Sep 13, 2022 / — -

Korea Trip - GKS - Language Study Plan

3 - Try specifying free language apps, pdf books etc you will use to learn Hangul...

Scholarshipfamma12345 - Sep 10, 2022 / julia_stn7 - Sep 12, 2022

Grew up in India - Study plan for Global KOREA SCHOLARSHIP

4 - i will see myself as a person give you a scholarship, you need to make this study plan logically....

ScholarshipTan18 - Sep 9, 2022 / mylife1234 - Sep 12, 2022

KGSP 2023 Scholarship for undergraduate. Multimedia Communication

2 - The essay needs to be completed totally in English or Hangul. Remove the Korean alphabet/ characters that were used...

Scholarshipmylife1234 - Sep 11, 2022 / Holt - Sep 11, 2022

GKS-U PERSONAL STATEMENT - DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION.

4 - I feel English is not your first language. Please get it reviewed by some professional whi can help you...

ScholarshipOlisan19 - Sep 4, 2022 / Tan18 - Sep 9, 2022

'How money is an essential in our life prosperity?' GKS-U personal statement

3 - @Holt Thank you so much for you feedback and suggestion, it will help me to improve my essay....

Scholarshipnazwa_adz - Sep 7, 2022 / nazwa_adz - Sep 8, 2022

"My life the way i want it" GKS-U Scholarship Personal Statement

6 - @Opeyemichristy Hello!! thank you for your advice! I will work on it! do not have many extracurriculars about my...

Scholarshipleo0528 - Sep 2, 2022 / leo0528 - Sep 7, 2022

I never thought the school media team would be a turning point in my life - GKS personal statement

4 - First of all, check your grammar please. And second, instead of answering "each" guidelines, write an essay with a...

ScholarshipMaLina - Aug 18, 2022 / Olisan19 - Sep 4, 2022

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