Home / Writing Feedback [29449] - page 14 of 491

Writing Feedback

Research advice on TOEFL, SAT, IELTS, GRE and other academic essays (page 14)

Replies | Threads

Overpopulation is the world's most serious environmental problem.

2 - Your paraphrasing was off to a good start. The basis for the succeeding discussions were also well established. However,...

Writing Feedbackthanhbui64 - Aug 17, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

[IELTS WRITING TASK 2] EDUCATION - vocational training

2 - This is not an extent essay. You need not over state your opinion. Just keep it simple. You...

Writing Feedbackbhan - Aug 16, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

The chart below show reasons why Americans travelled and the pie chart what problems concerned them

2 - There is an immediate problem to be found in the summary overview presentation. The first, is that you wrote...

Writing Feedbackntoaht17 - Aug 16, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

SHOULD SCHOOL CHILDREN BE GIVEN HOMEWORK (OPINION)?

2 - What do you think about homework? Do you see it as a necessary part of learning? Why did you...

Writing Feedbackminwy - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Nowadays, mobile phones and internet have become increasingly important in people's social life

2 - The advantages presentation is far better than the disadvantages discussion. You clearly have a better idea of how to...

Writing Feedbackjadenguyen252 - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

The graph below show the number of overseas tourist to three paricular areas

2 - The task is to complete a simple analysis of the given image. That should be completed within 200 words...

Writing Feedbackthuylinhdo - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Essay about behavior in schools is getting worse.

2 - Do not refer to a particular educational level in your restatement. This was not indicated in the original...

Writing Feedbacktrangnt - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

In recent years, more and more people are choosing to read e-books rather than paper books

2 - Good work on presenting the basis subjects for the discussion in your restatement and thesis section. However, you wrote...

Writing FeedbackDuy Dang - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Task: In the past lecture was the traditional method of teaching a large number of students

2 - It is not necessary to indicate how the essay will be written. You already made that clear in...

Writing Feedbackbuiha02 - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Writing task 2: Some people think that in the modern world, getting old is entirely bad.

2 - You are missing the personal opinion. The first paragraph is therefore incomplete. You cannot receive full scoring considerations...

Writing Feedbackdaniellee94 - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Historical information of residential areas is fascinatedly looked for by recent inhabitants

2 - There is no argument referenced in this discussion. An idea or public opinion was presented for discussion. Examiners...

Writing Feedbackquinlinn_21 - Aug 15, 2023 / Holt - Aug 21, 2023

Task 1 (barchart): Percentage of Canadians which gave money to charitable organisations by age

2 - The trending statement is too over emphasized. You do not need to present the middle part. The trend is...

Writing Feedbackeya123456 - Aug 14, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

The questions received by the tourist information office by letter or email, and by telephone

2 - I am not sure if you can complete this essay within 20 minutes. You wrote almost enough words for...

Writing Feedbackhung12345612 - Aug 14, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

IELTS Writing Task 1 - The use of water by four different countries (%)

2 - The summary is incomplete. The sector divisions should be listed to help add clarity to the references in the...

Writing FeedbackTonynhan - Aug 14, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

IELTS TASK 2 ACADEMIC - TOPIC: EDUCATION; In the modern world, schools are no longer necessary

2 - The first sentence of your prompt restatement is unnecessary. You need to be more focused on presenting the actual...

Writing FeedbackLinh1601 - Aug 14, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Write essay about consumption of 3 spreads from 1981 to 2007

2 - Always present a complete summary. Your information is good, but lacking one vital piece of information. You did not...

Writing Feedbackckhanb - Aug 13, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Newspapers, books? Internet offers people satisfying methods to get unlimited access to information

2 - Try to limit the presentation to 300 words. Keep track of how many words you can actually write within...

Writing FeedbackLENGUYENHONGPHUC - Aug 13, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

A topic of interest regarding the money for building the roads rather than new railways

2 - The prompt for this essay asks you to discuss "To what extent do you agree or disagree?" You are...

Writing Feedbackminh23102006 - Aug 13, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Advertising has become an inevitable part of our lives.

2 - You have used an incorrect discussion format in this instance. Since you opted to use the 3 opinion discussion...

Writing Feedbackjason hoang - Aug 11, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Consumers being overwhelmed with commercial advertisements since fierce competition among companies

2 - The promot restatement is acceptable but, the writer's opinion is not. You did not directly respond to the extent...

Writing Feedbackhaonhien15 - Aug 11, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

A controversial topic if governments should invest on railways rather than on roads

2 - The first sentence is unclear in reference. What is people's repair? It is a reference that does not connect...

Writing FeedbackNguyen Tan Hieu - Aug 11, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

IELTS Writing task 1 the number of people eating more than 5 portions of vegetables and fish per day

2 - The first major deductions to this essay will be applied to the GRA score. Please note that you are...

Writing FeedbackThanh John - Aug 10, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Students desire to study other courses beside their majors

2 - The prompt restatement is a bit confusing. If there are only some students claiming something, then why is there...

Writing Feedbackmolisa - Aug 10, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Writing IELTS Task 2: These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries

2 - While I do commend your effort in writing this essay, and you did do a good job in writing...

Writing Feedbackmaiannh - Aug 10, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

The number of magazines sold per person

2 - You should have taken the time to identify how the countries were enumerated in the presentation. That way...

Writing Feedbacktradauvantue - Aug 10, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

The two maps below describe a number of alterations which took place on a small offshore island

2 - You should not be referring to the positioning of the images on the screen. The examiner is assumed...

Writing Feedbacktrytoget7score - Aug 9, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Traffic and accommodation problems increasing, the government encourage some businesses move rural

2 - This is an advantage and disadvantage comparison essay. When writing such an essay, you are not asked to...

Writing FeedbackThuminh - Aug 9, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - The chart below shows the depth of snow (cm) in a particular ski resort

2 - This is a 20 minute writing task that should be allotted no more than 200 words for the full...

Writing Feedbackserebi2704 - Aug 9, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

Some people think that schools should teach/enroll students according to their academic abilities

2 - Do not lose sight of the writing time allowance for the task. Your presentation is hyperfocused on vocabulary, which...

Writing Feedbackvuongthaolinh - Aug 8, 2023 / Holt - Aug 20, 2023

CBEST WRITING: money available from the state budget for school districts

NEW - funds for school districts Question: The amount of money available from the state budget for school district X...

Writing FeedbackCbestcset - Aug 19, 2023 / — -

Some people say that aging population cause problems, others see benefits of it. Discuss both views

3 - @roadto8writing The writing is also a bit too passive. For an argumentative essay, I think you need to present...

Writing Feedbackroadto8writing - Aug 8, 2023 / kokosi - Aug 17, 2023

Are advertisement directed children?? (IELTS task 2)

4 - @thaoly2007 Your paraphrasing in the introduction part is good, but there is not your opinion. That is a crucial...

Writing Feedbackthaoly2007 - Aug 8, 2023 / thanhbui64 - Aug 17, 2023

Respect for educators and criticism for their teaching methods

3 - @Ta Nhi I think you should talk more specifically about the meaning of "two-way communication". The best method is...

Writing FeedbackTa Nhi - Aug 8, 2023 / thanhbui64 - Aug 17, 2023

[IELTS WRITING TASK 2] The news media should show equal amount of good and bad news

2 - You have failed to justify your opinion in this essay so it will not get a passing score. The...

Writing Feedbackhinam74 - Aug 7, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

[ IELTS WRITING TASK 1] The percentage of people going to the cinema once a month according to ages

2 - You failed to do a complete identification of the image for the summary overview. You need to specify the...

Writing Feedbackhaibinh20 - Aug 7, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

Juveniles should receive the same punishments as the adults. To what extend do you agree or not?

2 - Be careful with your word usage. The wrong word can decrease your LR, GRA, and C+C scores. Rejevenating...

Writing FeedbackMaeve111 - Aug 7, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

Not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. Why? Effects on society

2 - This is an empty thesis statement. There is no basis for this discussion presentation. What reasons relate to...

Writing Feedbacktieuthanh - Aug 7, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

WRITING TASK 2: People are spending less time with their families. What are the reasons + effects?

2 - Part of the preliminary scoring process is based on your ability to present summary responses to the given...

Writing FeedbackAdamClaus - Aug 7, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

Young people are required to work without pay in their free time to help the local community

2 - This is a comparison essay that is based on the advantages v. disadvantages of the given topic. The overall...

Writing FeedbackNhun - Aug 6, 2023 / Holt - Aug 16, 2023

Writing Task 1: Statistics of people who passed their driving exam in an Asian country in four years

3 - Here my opinion: - "it is clear that higher percentage of women who passed the test than men who...

Writing Feedbackrosiiieee12345 - Aug 4, 2023 / eya123456 - Aug 14, 2023

Task 1: The percentage for clothes, books, film, music and travel in online sales in New Zealand

4 - In my opinion, your essay is excellent! There is only one thing that could be improved to do better...

Writing Feedbacksemmast - Aug 5, 2023 / Tonynhan - Aug 14, 2023

In the chart the proportion of women employed in the USA, Korea, Afghanistan and France

4 - I love the way you describe the given data in the chart. But the final paragraph you connect the...

Writing FeedbackKbang - Aug 6, 2023 / selenakieu - Aug 14, 2023

Many museums, historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not by the locals - IELTS WRITING

2 - The writer's opinion could have used a clearer reference to the questions being asked instead of merely repeating the...

Writing Feedbackchauphan224 - Aug 6, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

Who do you think should fund medicine and treatments researches: individuals or the government?

2 - It is nice to know how you plan to write the essay. The problem is, you were being...

Writing FeedbackZen - Aug 6, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

Advertising in social media such as Facebook or Youtube

2 - Since you are self studying, Ic an understand why you will tend to write less than the minimum word...

Writing FeedbackNhatnotop - Aug 6, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries

2 - Use at least 2 sentences for the summary overview. You will get an impressive summary score if you use...

Writing Feedbackmmmphugn - Aug 5, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

Financial support to poorer countries is not effective

2 - The summary overview does not need to be a social studies lesson. It should only be composed of 2-3...

Writing Feedbackurrachelbae - Aug 5, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

WRITING TASK 1: The graph below shows the price of bananas in four countries between 1994 and 2004

2 - ther eis a conflict in this reference between the singular and plural words. 4 indicates a plural number...

Writing Feedbacktp123 - Aug 5, 2023 / Holt - Aug 13, 2023

The data about the volume of travelers who visited an island in the Caribbean between 2010 and 2017

3 - @Holt Thank you so much for your evaluation. I will have some fixes and adjustments in my next test....

Writing FeedbackRTroMT - Aug 4, 2023 / RTroMT - Aug 11, 2023

Writing task 1: The chart gives information on the percentage of women going into higher education

3 - @Holt Thank you so much for your review, I really appreciate it: This is the overview part I have...

Writing Feedbackeya123456 - Aug 4, 2023 / eya123456 - Aug 10, 2023

What brings more merits - getting an occupation or continuing studies after finishing school?

3 - @Holt that you mean those in body graph? sorry I dunno exactly what u mean to improve my writing...

Writing Feedbacknhim3607 - Aug 1, 2023 / nhim3607 - Aug 10, 2023

The pie charts show results of a survey of university about their part-time and full-time students.

3 - @Holt Thank you for your advice, I will note it down....

Writing Feedbackmyhelianthus - Aug 4, 2023 / myhelianthus - Aug 9, 2023

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other

2 - Do not over emphasize your opinion statement. It is not necessary in this case since you were not...

Writing FeedbackStellalightfairy - Aug 5, 2023 / Holt - Aug 9, 2023

Writing task 1: The two pie charts below show the percentages of industry's sectors contribution

2 - You incorrectly interpreted the image. When you say between, that means there are years mentioned that connect the...

Writing FeedbackVivian Gia Linh - Aug 4, 2023 / Holt - Aug 9, 2023

Both views to indicate the impact of using phones by students in school

2 - It is fine that you told the reader what you will be discussing. However, you will not get...

Writing Feedbackmayanhshine1803 - Aug 4, 2023 / Holt - Aug 9, 2023

Both view when using smartphones.

2 - You atr trying to convince the examiner that you have a valid opinion regarding the subject based on...

Writing FeedbackQngiua - Aug 3, 2023 / Holt - Aug 9, 2023

It is argued that parents should educate their kids to become a good person in society, not school

2 - This sentence will result in preliminary task accuracy score deductions. That is because you did not offer a...

Writing FeedbackLehau - Aug 3, 2023 / Holt - Aug 8, 2023

Learning history in school

2 - Try to write no more than 300 words with your next essay. You cannot write more than that during...

Writing Feedbackhayeon1402 - Aug 3, 2023 / Holt - Aug 8, 2023

Children should do organized activities or be free in their free time.

2 - There is a problem with the prompt restatement. You did not accurately restate both public opinions, standing aside from...

Writing Feedbackvantotet - Aug 3, 2023 / Holt - Aug 8, 2023

Convenient foods will replace traditional foods in the future... you agree or disagree?

2 - You showed that you understood the writing task. You also provided the correct response format for it. The word...

Writing FeedbackNgoc Ling - Aug 2, 2023 / Holt - Aug 8, 2023

Home / Writing Feedback

ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?

✖

Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳