|Writing Feedback [23,059] - page 222 of 385|
|GRE - ISSUE/ARGUMENT; All parents should volunteer time to their children's schools
3 - I like if you concluded this introduction with expressing you opinion rather than opening your essay with the opinion....
Writing FeedbackMoralesJ - Dec 3, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|[IELTS - Task 2] Examinations can give a clear picture of students' true ability
7 - That's good news! Please go to the EF Contributors page (you find it at the bottom - click on...
Writing Feedbackgreenleaf - Dec 9, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|IELTS essay - role of news editors in broadcasting the news
Writing FeedbackSreeSam - Dec 10, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|How do movies or television influence people's behavior? it is part of our lives
Writing Feedbackaoey - Dec 7, 2013 / aoey - Dec 10, 2013
|Homework helps teachers to assess students' understanding ; Advantages of homework
6 - Body paragraphs are used to elaborate on reasons. What is the key reason here? It is time management....
Writing FeedbackFofo123 - Dec 8, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|Characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality n development
5 - I think this sentence have no strength. It emphasizes nothing. Try to rewrite it and include your main...
Writing Feedbacknidhishaw - Dec 1, 2013 / mariali - Dec 10, 2013
|UK economic structure had experienced considerable changes over the last century - the graph
Writing Feedbackgreenleaf - Dec 7, 2013 / greenleaf - Dec 9, 2013
|IELTS Writing Task2 - Causes and solutions in preventing bad influence of adult products
7 - FrankZheng: Yep, thank you, now I find it clearer :D I should rewrite the second paragraph, and focus to...
Writing Feedbackmariali - Dec 9, 2013 / mariali - Dec 9, 2013
|Work or travel before university; very difficult to resume after discontinuation
4 - .... since you mentioned countries, you should have included at least one more country. Again the word "perspective"...
Writing Feedbacknidhishaw - Nov 30, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|hometown clean - if you could change one important thing about your hometown?
3 - Ok.... First, I have a few admin requests for you - Include the purpose of writing (e.g. TOEFL, IELTS)...
Writing Feedbackkhodekhodam - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|[TOEFL] Getting opinions from many sources could augment people's performance.
Writing Feedbacksomething - Dec 9, 2013 / something - Dec 9, 2013
|IELTS: applying community service in schools serving a good purpose
7 - You could rewrite again and again ,and assess according the standards by yourself. Maybe ,in this way ,you can...
Writing Feedbackfatihy007 - Dec 8, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 9, 2013
|Change is a defining moment that brings both positive and negative impacts; Life Changes
2 - Change is a defining moment that can cause both positive and negative impacts on our lives. The...
Writing FeedbackSamuel101 - Dec 1, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 9, 2013
|Effects of computers on children/youth
7 - Okkkkkk... you've posted the above response and that's exactly how you should make a comment on someone else's thread....
Writing Feedbackalmam - Nov 19, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|[IELTS / TASK 2] The government has to pay for aged care
5 - It's quite clear and I think your essay could hit the 6.5 band score :D Just pay more attention...
Writing Feedbackbellavista0414 - Dec 8, 2013 / mariali - Dec 8, 2013
|IELTS Writing Task 2 - Should we judge people by their appearance?
9 - haodiep7640 I'm so sorry, but what essay are you talking about? because there is one more essay above your...
Writing Feedbackmariali - Dec 3, 2013 / mariali - Dec 8, 2013
|[IELTS - Task 2] Trees are essential for the existence of the human race
Writing Feedbackgreenleaf - Dec 8, 2013 / greenleaf - Dec 8, 2013
|the one general thing everyone is going to buy is Technology; Persuasive Essay
Writing Feedbackkeikox - Dec 4, 2013 / mj2794 - Dec 8, 2013
|Who could this person be? descriptive essay
4 - Anyone????...
Writing Feedbackkawsneffect - Sep 19, 2013 / kawsneffect - Dec 8, 2013
|children in many countries are eating more fast-food and convenience snacks.
5 - "children and adult" should be "children and adults" "Furthermore, children's are more effective by this modern trend of...
Writing FeedbackGirishgautams - Dec 1, 2013 / bonjour - Dec 8, 2013
|if it should be parents who choose the partner of their children
5 - I guess you have written this essay in preparation for IELTS or TOEFL. It's always good to include that...
Writing Feedbackmonokakau - Nov 14, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|The charts below show the number of girls per 100 boys in all levels of education.
4 - Use the "Attach file(s)" feature that appears on the top in the Message block. Then select your file and...
Writing Feedbacktarhuna16 - Nov 12, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|Public utilities and surroundings are the primary factors to consider before moving to a place
7 - I don't find much meaning in this line.... Your introduction sounds better without this line. Therefore,...
Writing Feedbackaoey - Nov 21, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|"Whether or not violent media has a harmful effect on children"
3 - First of all, what is the purpose of writing this essay? Is this for practicing for TOEFL or IELTS?...
Writing FeedbackT1G - Nov 11, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|university students required to attend classes; learn better when attend
3 - .... Secondly followed by Firstly gives a bit of an odd feeling to the reader. You better rephrase...
Writing Feedbackanteros06 - Dec 7, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|IELTS letter- request for a training course to your manager
5 - Many thanks to sigh3508,dumi,pahan. I rewrite this letter to make it more convincing. I am writing to...
Writing FeedbackFrankZheng - Dec 6, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 8, 2013
|Difference between Public and Private School
6 - I'm not sure if your post is looking for help in general or just grammar help, but there seems...
Writing Feedbacklaxmineupane - Dec 7, 2013 / Lydmeister - Dec 8, 2013
|The salary of top management stuff and menial workers in big companies differ
4 - The salaries between the top management members and the members of lower grades differ significantly. This...
Writing Feedbacktarhuna16 - Nov 10, 2013 / dumi - Dec 7, 2013
|TOEFL: people can communicate faster and more conveniently using phone or e-mail
Writing Feedbackphuongnam95 - Dec 4, 2013 / phuongnam95 - Dec 7, 2013
|University studies are easier than you think
Writing FeedbackYazale - Dec 3, 2013 / dumi - Dec 7, 2013
|IELTS Writing Task 2; Old values have no relevance in the modern world
Writing Feedbackgreenleaf - Dec 5, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 7, 2013
|"Adolescence Stripped Away"
Writing FeedbackGreg Wolf - Dec 3, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 7, 2013
|TOEFL PRACTICE - I prefer to live in big city - more convenient and appropriate
Writing Feedbackllxcodegeass - Dec 5, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 6, 2013
|IELTS practice-Government should subsidize traditional arts? by doing what?
Writing Feedbackterry_tian - Dec 5, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 6, 2013
|Toefl. Should countries engage with others or they should isolate from other countries.
Writing Feedbacksanzhar - Dec 4, 2013 / sanzhar - Dec 6, 2013
|IELTS1: process by which academic books are published
4 - Where is the flow chart? It's good to upload all the diagrams so that others can refer to them...
Writing Feedbackinhe - Nov 11, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|Lots of people choose to have a pet as a companion in their lives
6 - Some grammatical errors: teach somebody something (to do something); expect somebody to do something I think you...
Writing FeedbackKate64 - Nov 23, 2013 / greenleaf - Dec 6, 2013
|IELTS: ECOLOGICAL BALANCE; 'technology as major culprit for ecological impact'
Writing Feedbackgtamani - Nov 23, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|No field of study can advance significantly unless it incorporates outside knowledge.
2 - What is the purpose of this writing? Is it for GRE? It's always better you include this purpose in...
Writing FeedbackPriGo - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|[IELTS ,Letter] Apply for a housekeeping position
Writing FeedbackFrankZheng - Dec 5, 2013 / FrankZheng - Dec 6, 2013
|agree that telephones are playing a more effective role than television in people's life
Writing Feedbacksurichen - Dec 5, 2013 / haodiep7640 - Dec 5, 2013
|IELTS (Academic)Task 2- Responsibility to pay for the cost of road development
Writing FeedbackRachel26HJ - Nov 28, 2013 / JethroJosh - Dec 5, 2013
|In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods.
Writing FeedbackCASOON - Dec 3, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 5, 2013
|IELTS Task 2 - Will the Internet make schools unnecessary in the future?
2 - voldemortlucky [i][i]Hi My first language is not English, may be I'm not good at telling you how to correct...
Writing Feedbackvoldemortlucky - Dec 4, 2013 / buheboljgin - Dec 4, 2013
|Is the Affordable Care Act a good idea;English1001 Explanatory Paper on Health Care Reform
2 - Yh that's really good.you shouldn't include 'the main sticking point'!try something like the main priority stance is.......
Writing FeedbackRowbear - Dec 3, 2013 / Emerald123 - Dec 4, 2013
|IELTS; Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together
4 - I think that the second sentence is like a fact and Internet not only touched aspect in the past,...
Writing Feedbackgtamani - Dec 4, 2013 / phuongnam95 - Dec 4, 2013
|Ielts ;Does modern technology make life more convenient, or otherwise?
Writing FeedbackLorax - Dec 1, 2013 / gtamani - Dec 4, 2013
|School violence is one of the social issues that is demanding corrective attention
Writing Feedbackhaodiep7640 - Nov 30, 2013 / haodiep7640 - Dec 4, 2013
|Toefl Essay- How do movies and TV Influence our behavior?
Writing FeedbackAlice123 - Nov 29, 2013 / sanzhar - Dec 4, 2013
|IELTS : consumers and advertisements
Writing Feedbackgavin - Dec 3, 2013 / gavin - Dec 4, 2013
|Do you agree that every organization has a right to set age maximum for the candidates ?
6 - Hey...don't worry, with practice you'll get over it :D You need a good hook to start with. This hook...
Writing Feedbackalex90 - Nov 30, 2013 / dumi - Dec 4, 2013
|IELTS (Academic)Task 2- Museums VS. Internet
Writing FeedbackJiaYin - Dec 2, 2013 / MisterWandering - Dec 3, 2013
|some people prefer to eat at food stands. other people prefer to eat food at home.
Writing Feedbacksaadati - Nov 24, 2013 / saadati - Dec 3, 2013
|Does Media Violence Cause Violent Behavior?
3 - dumi ty...
Writing FeedbackTiffanye Duthie - Dec 2, 2013 / Tiffanye Duthie - Dec 3, 2013
|IELTS TASK 1; Making sea water drinkable
Writing Feedbackhanasaka - Dec 1, 2013 / khodekhodam - Dec 3, 2013
|Introduction of essay: How to become a doctor
Writing FeedbackPraewa - Dec 3, 2013 / Praewa - Dec 3, 2013
|Toefl ; Independence from parents
2 - First, it is better if you post the prompt together with your essay so that we can understand what...
Writing Feedbacksanzhar - Dec 3, 2013 / dumi - Dec 3, 2013
|'Jail time or community sevices work' - Ielts essay 02
5 - First, I have an admin request for you - IELTS threads should be opened in Writing Feedback forum (...
Writing FeedbackHgly - Nov 21, 2013 / dumi - Dec 3, 2013
|IELTS ; Individual greed and selfishness has been the basis of the modern society.
Writing Feedbackpooh - Dec 3, 2013 / pooh - Dec 3, 2013
|IELTS (Academic)Task 2- Is advertisement just a form of entertainment?
2 - Well, I think this introduction of the background of this issue is somewhat deviated from the actual one....
Writing FeedbackRachel26HJ - Dec 2, 2013 / dumi - Dec 2, 2013
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